Traditions and the Triumph of Persistence
"Hey, Sunshine!" Debbie called out as she walked into the living room from the
kitchen, carrying a plate of cookies that Vic had just made.
Justin looked up from his calculus homework he'd been working on at the coffee
table and gave her a questioning look.
Debbie walked over to Justin and sat down next to him, setting the plate of
cookies down, and smiled as she watched Justin eye the cookies with interest.
"How about a break, kiddo," she suggested.
Justin shrugged. "I'm finished, I was just checking my answers."
"Of course you are," Debbie gushed, and affectionately smacked his cheek, making
Justin blush slightly at her praise. He was still getting used to that. It had
always just been expected that he be a responsible student -- especially
considering how much his parents were paying for him to be in a private school.
He certainly wasn't accustomed to people coddling him over his good grades...
but he found that he kind of liked it.
Justin grabbed a warm freshly baked cookie and took a big bite from it, enjoying
the taste of the melted chocolate chips.
"You know, I used to have to nag Michael to do his homework every night. He was
always so caught up in that fucking Captain Astro comic, he never wanted to pay
attention to anything else -- well, except for Brian, of course," Debbie added,
rolling her eyes.
The mention of Brian's name, made Justin perk up. "And what was Brian like?" he
asked with intrigue. He was always interested
in learning more about Brian Kinney, and loved it when Debbie or any of the
other gang would fill him in on past or present details of the older man's life.
Debbie chuckled as she thought back to a tall, skinny, and rather reserved
teen-aged Brian. "Shit, that kid had a fucking photographic memory! 'Course,
Brian has always been smart -- soaks up information like a sponge. The only
class Brian shared with Michael in school was P.E. because Brian was in all
advanced classes. And despite all the shit he went through at home, he was
still able to focus on his schooling and maintained straight "A's" throughout
high school," Debbie said, and then shook her head in amazement. "Used to say
that it would be his ticket to get the fuck out of here."
"But... he's still here," Justin said with a puzzled look.
Debbie nodded. "Things don't always work out the way we think they will,
kiddo," she said. Justin could sense that there was something missing that
Debbie wasn't telling him about Brian; maybe the reason that kept Brian in
Pittsburgh, and Justin wondered what in the world could have deterred Brian from
leaving the place he loathed.
Before Justin could question Debbie some more about Brian, she stood up. "Well
then, Sunshine, since you're done with your homework, you can follow me," she
said, and started walking towards the staircase.
"What for?" he asked, standing up.
Debbie turned around and faced him. "You're going to help me bring out all the
Christmas stuff from the attic, that's what."
Justin frowned. "Deb, Thanksgiving, like, just ended. Isn't it a little early
for that?"
Debbie looked at the teen like he had two heads. "Early? I should have already
had the stuff out last week! With Kiki and John both being out sick with the
flu, I've been filling in extra shifts at the diner, so I haven't had the
time." She saw that Justin still had an uncertain look on his face and frowned
at him.
"You got a problem with that?" she asked, with a hand on her hip.
Justin shook his head vehemently. "Uh, no. It's just that at our house we don't
put our decorations out or get a tree until the second week of December. Mom
always says it's better that way because the tree stays more fresh until New
Year's Day."
"Well, around here, we get into the Christmas spirit fucking early. The earlier
the better, I always say! And we have been using the same tree every year for
the last fifteen years -- one that doesn't shed pine needles all over the
fucking floor. If you really want it to smell like a tree in here, we can have
Michael bring home some of that Christmas tree scented spray -- that pine in the
bottle shit, or whatever it is, from the Big Q," she said.
Justin made a face. "I think I can live without it."
"Good. Now get your cute bubble butt up off the couch and come help me," she
said, and started walking up the stairs.
Justin glanced at his watch. "Hey, uh, Deb, is this going to take very long?"
She turned around to face him again. "Why, you got somewhere to be, Casanova?"
she asked.
"Well, um, actually Brian --"
"Uh-huh. I should have known," she said, rolling her eyes. "You know, it
wouldn't kill you to spend at least one night away from Mr. Wonderful. You're
part of our family now, Sunshine, and you should be here sharing in this
tradition!"
"But... I had plans to --"
Debbie's hand was still planted on her hip and she gave Justin her stern
"don't-even-
Justin sighed, but didn't argue further, knowing it would do no good. Shit! He
didn't exactly have plans with Brian per se, but he'd overheard Michael mention
to Ted and Emmett over breakfast the day before about some big event that was
going on at Babylon the following evening -- some contest of some sort, and
undoubtedly, Brian would be there. Justin had headed straight over to Torso
after school and ended up spending the last of his paycheck on a hot new outfit
for Babylon -- one in which he'd hoped would catch Brian's attention enough to
take Justin back to the loft tonight rather than some stupid trick, and fuck him
all night long. Again.
Justin grinned at that thought. Yes, he just knew he was getting under Brian's
skin little by little. Mister "I don't fuck guys more than once" had broken his
rule for Justin -- and definitely not just once. When Justin started losing
count in his head how many times they'd fucked around, he'd started a journal to
keep track that way. To date, they'd had sex
eight times so far -- and that didn't include all the blow and rim jobs in
between -- which he also logged in the journal faithfully. They probably would
have done it more times by now if Brian didn't snub him so often for older,
beefier tricks he met at Babylon and Woody's. Justin knew that when he showed
up to Brian's usual hang-outs that there was about an eighty-five percent chance
that Brian would ignore him and leave with some trick. However, there were
times that Brian ended up calling Justin to come over to the loft after said
trick was unsatisfactory. It was apparent that Brian was a lot more tolerable
of Justin now, and even though the older man could still be a mean bastard or
make him feel about twelve years old, Justin knew that Brian liked him. There
was no way he would be in his bed as often as he was, if he didn't. Constantly
hanging around really was paying off! Daphne
was a fucking genius!
"Don't even think you can make any more excuses to get out of this, kiddo,"
Debbie said, breaking Justin out of his thoughts. "Come on," she told him, and
started back up the stairs, knowing that he would follow.
Justin sighed again, mentally saying goodbye to any hope of what might have been
his and Brian's ninth fuck-fest. He'd have to plan something else soon. Justin
knew that in order to maintain his place in Brian's life, he had to keep
thinking of ways to hold Brian's interest, and in order to do that, meant he
needed to constantly be around him. So far, it had worked. And sometimes he
didn't have to try hard at all, like when Brian let Justin live with him because
of Justin's father's attitude about his being gay. And then of course he'd
never forget the fact that Brian actually went to look for him in New York!
That was when Justin really knew Brian cared.
And if he could help it, it was going to stay that way.
****
"Here, start with these, Sunshine, while I unravel all the lights," Debbie said,
handing Justin a small box of various colored ornaments. Nat King Cole's
O Come All Ye Faithful was blaring on the
record player, and the living room was littered with boxes and Christmas
paraphernalia that Debbie was sorting through.
It felt a bit strange for Justin to be participating in such a family oriented
thing where his parents weren't involved, and a wave of nostalgia and sadness
hit him, as he thought about how every year, he and his dad went together to
pick out a tree to chop down. Afterward, they would go home and he and his
little sister Molly would help his mom decorate the tree and they'd munch on the
gingerbread cookies that were made from his great grandmother'
"Your mom came into the diner this morning," Deb suddenly said, as if sensing
Justin's nostalgia. She watched as he silently tried to focus on his task.
"She was dropping off your refill for your allergy medicine."
"Oh," Justin said quietly.
"She mentioned that your sister's gettin' pretty good on those new skates your
dad bought her for her birthday."
Justin turned around and nodded nonchalantly. "Skating is Molly's biggest
obsession. She never gets tired of it," he said.
Vic walked over and set another plate of cookies on the coffee table. "Maybe
you could join them at the rink next time," he suggested.
Justin shrugged. "Yeah, maybe."
Justin thought about the ecstatic look on Molly's face when she had received her
new skates for her birthday, how she had squealed in delight and immediately put
them on, swearing she was going to wear them forever and ever, and damn, the kid
had meant it. After that day, his mother had a hard time getting Molly to take
the skates off. She even wore them at the dinner table. Somehow, Justin found
himself missing his little sister skating throughout the house, their mother
yelling at her to go outside before she tracked mud on the floor. Justin had
always complained that Molly was a pest, and she was, but she
was an eight year old girl, after all... and
admittedly, he missed her. Justin knew she probably didn't understand what was
going on with him, and he wished he could explain to her why he wasn't home.
He'd be willing to bet that she was asking a lot of questions and that his
parents were avoiding them like the plague. Justin guessed his father probably
avoided all topics concerning his only son. Maybe they were hoping that one day
he'd "straighten up" and things would go back to the way they used to be so they
wouldn't have to explain anything, ever.
"Michael was never any good on skates," continued Debbie, with a chuckle.
"Every time I'd take him ice skating when he was a little boy, he spent more
time on his butt than his feet!" She and Vic laughed, and Justin laughed along
with them at the mental image of Michael being a klutzy kid.
"So, um, how come Michael isn't here joining in on this tradition too?" Justin
asked, wondering if Michael was out with Brian somewhere, and feeling a tinge of
jealousy at the thought.
"Well, he's got plans with David later tonight, but said he'd stop by. He
called earlier to say that he had to stay at work for a couple extra hours. One
of his co-workers was feeling ill and so he offered to stay and finish her shift
so she could leave early," she smiled.
"Good old Michael," Vic smiled.
"Damn right. That boy's got a heart of gold!"
With his back turned, Justin made a face that Debbie couldn't see, as he
continued putting the colorful bulbs on the branches of the artificial Christmas
tree. He didn't exactly share Deb's enthusiasm about her son. It was clear
Michael didn't like Justin, and frankly, he didn't care for Michael much
either. He hated that Michael was always so patronizing toward him. Add to
the fact that it was getting old really fast that Michael, a
grown man,
kept whining that Justin had taken over his precious bedroom. Justin wondered
why the fuck Michael cared so much that Justin was using the room. It was just
a room! One that Michael didn't even sleep in anymore, at that. What the fuck
did he think Justin was going to do to it, scribble all over the walls in
crayon? Break all his Captain Astro action figures? Justin agreed with Brian;
Michael really was pathetic.
Furthermore, if Justin had to hear Michael brag about Brian being his best
friend "since we were 14!" one more time, he was going to fucking scream. And
he wanted to. Really bad. He wanted to scream, "Get the fuck over yourself!
He doesn't want you!" But after the comment he'd made to Michael about hanging
around Brian after all these years because he'd never gotten off, Justin decided
that he should keep more of those kinds of thoughts to himself - even if they
were true. He didn't need to give Michael a reason to be an even bigger asshole
to him. Justin wondered if he and Michael would always dislike each other or if
there would ever be a possibility of friendship. He seriously doubted it.
"Michael's always been the kind of person to go out of his way to do nice things
for people," Debbie went on.
Someone snorted. "Yeah, Mikey's a fucking angel."
Brian.
Justin felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, and couldn't help the
smile that spread across his face. He hoped that he wasn't blushing, and was a
little glad his head was turned so they couldn't see his face. He hated being
so obvious.
"Thanks a lot, asshole," Michael told his friend, and walked over to give his
mother a kiss on the cheek.
"We didn't hear you two come in," Vic said.
"Gee, I wonder why. Could it be that the Christmas music is so loud, you can
hear it all the way down the fucking block?" Brian smirked.
"And what's wrong with enjoying Nat King Cole during the holiday season?" Debbie
demanded.
"Nothing at all. I especially love that it makes me want to cuddle by a roaring
fire with my beloved and share a nice, hot, cup of cocoa!" Brian said with fake
enthusiasm.
Debbie rolled her eyes at Brian. "Yeah, and I'm fucking Cleopatra!"
Brian looked down at the open boxes which were sprawled throughout the living
room, and picked up an ornament that looked as if it were made by a
kindergartener, and laughed at Michael's embarrassed face. Obviously, Debbie
had saved Michael's hand-made ornament from all those years ago. She was
sentimental like that.
Brian smirked, then set his eyes on Justin, who looked way too interested in his
task of putting ornaments on the tree. "Bet those weren't the kind of balls you
had in mind to spend an evening with, eh, Sunshine?"
Justin chuckled and felt his face heat up as he turned to face Brian. "Did you
guys come to help?" he asked. As he looked at Brian, he felt his lower region
start to react. The man was so fucking hot, and Justin wondered if it was
possible for Brian to grow more beautiful every day. He was dressed in
form-fitting black 501 jeans, and a long sleeved burgundy cotton shirt that
Justin loved. Brian looked great in just about any color, but Justin thought
that there was something about burgundy that made the man look even more
irresistible. A black wool Prada coat completed the man's outfit, which of
course fit his body like it was made for Brian and Brian only. All Justin could
think about was how he'd give anything to slowly undress the handsome stud right
there, and then drop to his knees to suck him off. Maybe he could somehow get
Brian to follow him upstairs...
"I'm not staying. I'm just the designated driver," Brian said with a smirk.
"But you look like you're having loads of fun," he told Justin.
"Deb sort of made me help," Justin replied, feeling a little self conscious. He
knew how it must look being surrounded by all the Christmas stuff and decorating
the tree; oh, the *kid* must be sooo excited for
Christmas! Hands down, he would much
rather go with Brian to Babylon than decorate Deb's fake Christmas tree.
"Yeah, well, if you don't like it you could always go home," Michael said.
"Cut it out, Mikey," Brian said, rolling his eyes.
Justin gaped at Brian. Had he just defended
him?
"What? If it's so bad here, why doesn't he just go back to his own family?"
Michael said, grumpily.
Debbie frowned and slapped her son upside the head.
"Ouch! What the hell was that for?" Michael cried, rubbing his head.
"Sunshine is family, and he's not fucking
going anywhere, so you're just going to have to get used to it, Michael," Debbie
said. Michael crossed his arms and pouted, but didn't argue.
"So, where are you off to for this evening, Brian?" Vic asked, redirecting the
conversation.
"There's an important 'event' at Babylon," Michael said dryly.
Debbie cackled. "I'll bet!"
Brian looked at Justin. "And before you even ask, no, you can't come."
"I --"
Michael shook his head at the teen. "Oh, no. Don't even think about it, boy
wonder. You're staying here. I'm not babysitting
two people tonight," Michael huffed.
Justin glared at Michael. "I'm not a little kid. I don't
need a babysitter."
Michael rolled his eyes. "Right. Seems like that's all everyone has done since
you showed up, is babysit."
"What the hell is your problem? And what the fuck did you mean by babysitting
two people?" Brian asked Michael.
"You know exactly what I meant, and you know damn well how it goes. You go off
to drink and drug yourself stupid; get lost in the crowd to dance with some
potential trick; then disappear in the back room with said trick. Wash, rinse,
repeat. In the meantime, when I'm not busy making sure you haven't passed the
fuck out somewhere or are getting dehydrated, who's going to watch
him?" Michael said, pointing to Justin.
"Well, excuse the fuck out of me for wanting to fuck as much as I can before I
get to be an old, wrinkly, fat-fuck with hemorrhoids and dementia."
"I'm 17. I don't need anyone to watch me," Justin tried to chime in, but the
two friends continued to ignore him.
"Wait a second. I thought you said you were going to be with David tonight,"
Debbie said with a frown.
"Now, why would Michael want to give up the chance to see his boyfriend for one
night instead of hanging out with the people who
really care about him?"
"You know, this is so typical of you! You belittle everything that David does
and says. He's shown me that he cares about me, and I think you're jealous!"
"I don't do jealous, Mikey. You know that," Brian said, but Justin wasn't sure
he believed what the man was saying.
"I was supposed to be with David tonight, but no; it was
so important to you that I go out to Babylon
instead. But for what? So you have someone to drive you home later?" Michael
was getting angry.
"You're right, Mikey. You shouldn't be wasting your time at Babylon with the
rest of us lowlifes. You'd be much better off hanging out with your rich doctor
boyfriend at some fabulous dinner party pretending to be someone you're not,"
Brian said.
"Fuck you," Michael growled and then stormed out of the room. They were all
silent for a few moments.
"You just had to do that, didn't you?" Debbie finally said, giving Brian a
knowing look and then shaking her head.
"Justin, I'm going to the kitchen to make some coffee. Why don't you join me,"
Vic said. Justin nodded, thinking that was a good idea, and followed the older
man out of the room.
Several minutes later Deb came into the kitchen shaking her head.
"Did Brian leave?" Justin asked.
"Oh, yeah. Straight to Babylon to fuck and suck his problems away, I assume,"
she said, taking a seat at the kitchen table and pouring herself a cup of coffee
that had been left out for her.
"Give Brian a break, Sis. You know this is the first time that Brian has ever
really felt threatened by someone taking Michael away from him."
Debbie frowned. "That doesn't give Brian the right to fuck this up for him!
Michael has never really had a boyfriend like David, and Brian is going to ruin
it, just like he does every time Michael seems interested in any guy who is more
than a one-night stand."
****
Justin awoke in a dazed state, realizing there was an annoying noise blaring to
the left of his ear. He reached out in an attempt to hit the "snooze" on his
alarm clock, when he noticed that the time was 2:34 a.m. and that it wasn't his
alarm that was going off, it was his cellphone ringing. He looked at the Caller
I.D. which read "Unknown number," and reluctantly answered.
"Hello?"
"Rise and shiiiiine, Sunshine!" a voice said, music blaring in the background.
"Brian?" Justin asked, more awake now, resting back on his elbows. "Are you
still at Babylon?"
"You get a goooold star, boy genius!"
"You're drunk," Justin sighed, and laid back on his pillow.
"Among other things," the man slightly slurred. "Which brings me to the reason
I'm calling."
"What?"
"I called a cab to come pick you up. I need you to drive me back to my loft."
Justin sat up in bed. "You -- you want me to
drive your Jeep?" he asked in disbelief.
"How the fuck else am I supposed to get it home? Ted and Emmett already left
and Mikey's at the good doctor's house."
"Um --"
"Be ready in ten minutes. The cab should be there soon." Before Justin could
reply with "Okay," Brian hung up.
****
Brian walked over to the cab's driver's side window and
handed the man a wad of bills. He then looked over at a tired, sleep-tousled,
Justin, and chuckled. The kid's hair was sticking up in the back.
"What?" Justin asked innocently.
Brian shook his head. "Forget it." He held out his keys. "Let's get the fuck
out of here. I've been freezing my balls off for the last ten minutes waiting
for you," he said, dropping his cigarette butt onto the ground and stepping on
it.
"Okay," Justin said, and tentatively reached out to take the keys from the older
man, when Brian pulled them back out of his reach.
"You do know how to drive a stick, right?" he
asked.
Justin smiled at him. "Sure. My dad taught me, like, six months ago," he
said.
Brian stared at him, contemplating whether or not the teen was telling the
truth. After a moment, he handed the keys to Justin, but didn't let go of them
just yet. "I don't let just anyone drive this Jeep. Do not make me regret
this," Brian said, and finally let go of the keys.
"Trust me, it'll be fine," Justin assured him, albeit annoyed. He was so sick
of people thinking he couldn't do things just because he was a teenager.
"It better be," Brian said, as they climbed into the Jeep. "And don't fuck with
my radio settings," he added.
"Whatever," Justin shrugged.
Justin managed to get them back to the loft in one piece, with Brian only
bitching a few times along the way. After parking the Jeep, Justin sat
nervously in the driver's seat and looked at Brian. "Um... so are you going to
call a cab to take me back to Debbie's?"
Brian leaned in, casually letting his hand rest on the crotch of Justin's
cargos, then put his lips to the young man's ear. "Do you
want to go back to Debbie's?" he asked, in
that tone that made Justin tingle inside and out.
"Are you kidding?" Justin almost laughed. Of course he didn't want to go back
to Deb's. He wanted nothing than for Brian to drag him up to his loft and fuck
him into the mattress. However, he had learned never to assume anything with
Brian, and always prepared himself for the let-down. Brian's moods were
unpredictable, and he never really knew what to expect from the man.
"Well, then, young man. Let's get the fuck out of this Jeep and go up to my
loft so I can show you just how much you won't
be missing at Deb's," he smirked.
"Let's go," Justin said, and thought that he'd probably never exited a car that
fast in his life.
****
"Brian?" a satiated Justin whispered. Brian's body was facing away from
Justin. They had been laying there for a few minutes, and although Justin was
pretty tired, his mind was busy, and he couldn't help but think about his
conversation with Debbie earlier.
"The fucking sun is about to come up, Justin," Brian mumbled.
"I know. It's a good thing tomorrow is Saturday," he said. He hoped that
Debbie wouldn't freak when she called him down for breakfast in a few hours and
found he wasn't there. "Um, Brian?" he asked again, and heard an exasperated
sigh.
"What?"
"Do you hate Pittsburgh?"
Brian turned around and glared at the younger man. "What the fuck are you
talking about?"
"It's just that -- I don't know, you're always talking about how much the Pitts
suck."
"Yeah, and...?"
"But... you've never left. Why?"
"Who the fuck are you, Barbara Walters? It's almost 5:00 in the morning,
Justin. Do you really think now is the time to play twenty questions?"
"Sorry." Justin avoided looking at Brian. He always managed to come off
looking like a pathetic kid in front of Brian.
Brian sighed. The kid was so fucking inquisitive. It really drove him nuts
sometimes! "If I tell you, will you promise to go to sleep and leave me the
fuck alone?" Justin's surprised eyes darted back to look at him, and he
nodded.
"I was going for a soccer scholarship in my senior year of high school. Scouts
from UCLA, Notre Dame, and a couple other colleges were coming to see our
championship tournament. The night before the tournament, I'd come back home
late and ran into Jack, whom of course was fucking drunker than a skunk. We
argued about me coming in late, and he ended up taking a swing at me. I ended
up punching him back, and then we started wrestling. At one point he knocked me
onto the tile floor hard and I heard a loud crack. Fucking dislocated my
kneecap and ended up having to wear a knee brace and be on crutches for weeks.
Needless to say, I couldn't be in any soccer games, and there went my chance at
that scholarship.
Justin reached over and gently squeezed Brian's hand. "I'm sorry that
happened."
Brian shrugged. "It is what it is. I had good enough grades to get into those
colleges those scouts were from, but I couldn't afford to go to any of them. I
applied for an academic scholarship but I found out that it only covered half of
the tuition. So I applied at Carnegie Mellon and majored in business. I worked
my ass off to pay for tuition and books. I was able to get few grants and that
helped out a lot. I thought about maybe leaving the Pitts after I graduated
college, but during my senior year, I started interning at Ryder and was able to
get my foot in the door, so I stayed."
"If you had the opportunity to leave Pittsburgh now, would you?" Justin asked.
"If it was a good opportunity and the price was right? Fuck, yeah, I would
leave in a heartbeat."
"Oh."
Brian looked at the kid's face and could see that it wasn't the answer Justin
was hoping for. It was apparent that his leaving Pittsburgh actually bothered
Justin. The damn kid actually cared whether or not Brian stayed. It was
actually kind of sweet.
Brian rolled over so that he was on top of Justin, and pulled the covers down to
expose the younger man's hardening cock. "But I'm still here, Sunshine," he
said, and crawled down the smooth, lithe, body. He heard Justin suddenly gasp,
and smiled back at him as he wrapped his hand around the base of Justin' hard,
weeping, rod, before dipping down to take the member into his mouth, never
letting his gaze leave the dilated blue eyes that stared back at him.
Justin watched as Brian devoured his cock and struggled to keep his eyes open so
he could hold the intense stare Brian was giving him. All the meanwhile, he
said a silent prayer that Brian wouldn't get a good opportunity to leave
Pittsburgh any time soon.