Authors Note:  Takes place after 307.




            Brian surveyed the kingdom below him, trying to decide which one of his subjects he would allow to please him tonight.  He watched the gyrating, sweaty bodies below  and felt that familiar twitch in his cock.  One man caught his eye, he’d recognize the blonde anywhere.

            Shit, he’s been here every night this week.

            Brian was going to assume something had gone terribly wrong in paradise.  Little Sunshine didn’t wear the ring the fiddle player had given him, and the spark had gone out from his eyes.  Brian had to admit he was unnerved when he and Justin locked eyes in the back room last week.  His eyes held that same dead look.  No one mentioned anything and he sure as hell wasn’t going to ask.  For a moment Brian wondered where Justin was staying if he had broken up with Ethan.  In all honesty, he was kind of surprised Justin didn’t show up at his door.

            He headed downstairs and saw Emmett and Ted at the bar.  He sided up to them, “Shouldn’t you be entertaining your suburban society friends?”

            Ted glared at Brian, Brian knew darn well that they had to give up the house when the “porn” charges were dropped against him.

            “You know Bri, you should get out there and protect your kingdom, it looks like your favorite little pupil is staking his claim.”  Emmett gestured to the dance floor, where Justin was leading a trick to the back room.

            “Yeah, since he’s been single, he’s giving you a run for your money.”

            Brian barely heard Ted’s comment, he was stalking across the dance floor.  He headed into the back room just in time to see the trick going down on his baby.  Justin’s head was back and his eyes were closed.  Brian smacked the trick on the back of the head, surprising the man, “Fuck off!”          

            Justin’s head snapped up.  When the trick made no move to leave, Brian leaned in and said menacingly, “Fuck off!”

            The trick walked away, and Brian found himself looking into blazing blue eyes, “What the fuck are you doing?”

            “Well I want to fuck you, and I wasn’t about to do that when some trick is sucking your dick.”

            “I thought you liked group sex.  Besides why would I want you to fuck me?”

            “Since you’re single again, you wouldn’t be cheating, and you know we’re still hot for each other.”

            Justin’s eyes turned sad and his gaze lowered a second before he looked into Brian’s hazel eyes, “That’s the problem Brian, you were always hot for me, but I was in love with you.  Getting over you has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done, it almost killed me.  You’ll have to excuse me if I don’t want to do it again.”

            Justin turned and walked away, leaving a speechless Brian in the back room.



            Justin quietly let himself into Daphne’s apartment.  She had been really sweet about letting him use her couch until he figured out a place to stay.  Luckily Daph’s roommate Teri really liked him so she didn’t mind either.  There were a few details he didn’t think about when he walked out of Ethan’s.  A place to live was one of them.

            He knew he made the right decision.  He almost wanted to laugh when Ethan brought Brian up, that nailed his coffin.  No matter how much hurt and pain Brian caused, he never lied to Justin and never promised things he wouldn’t give.  Ethan had no comeback for that, he knew it was true.  Maybe Brian was right, maybe love and romance were bullshit.  Ethan had done the romance so well, Justin was sucked right in.  In the end, Ethan cheating on him with one guy hurt him more than Brian cheating on him with hundreds.  It all had to do with promises.



            Brian thought about the scene at Babylon.  What the hell had he been thinking approaching his former lover and announcing that he wanted to fuck him.  That’s what caused this whole two and a half year drama.  He wanted to fuck Justin that first night, and look what happened.  He should be thankful Justin was smart enough to not want to go back there.  But in the back of his mind, was the nagging suspicion that he wanted to.  Brian decided he needed to get some help.




            The next day Brian found himself driving to the Pittsburgh campus of the University of Pennsylvania.  He was hoping to be able to find Daphne.  He briefly wondered how he went from not giving a shit about Justin to wanting him back.  He had no idea what to do.  Maybe Daphne could give him some ideas, if she’d even speak to him.

            He saw her coming out of one of the buildings.  “Daphne!” 

            Daphne looked up at the sound of her name.  You could have knocked her over with a feather when she saw Brian Kinney standing across the street next to a hot Corvette.  He held his hand up in slight wave.

            “Umm, guys I’ll catch up with you later.”  Her friends were suitably impressed when they saw the hot guy she went running over to meet.

            “Umm, hi Brian.  What are you doing here?”

            “I was hoping to talk to you, are you free right now?”

            “Sure, I just finished my last class.”

            The two climbed into Brian’s car, and he pulled away from the campus.

            “This is a hot car Brian, is it new?”

            “Yeah, I’ve had it a few weeks.  I outgrew the jeep.”

            This made Daphne laugh, “and you replaced it with the ultimate mid-life crisis, I’m still a stud sports car?”

            Brian glared at Daphne, he’d forgotten how blunt she could be.  He’d never forget when she popped him one at Woody’s when Justin ran off to New York.  His glare only made Daphne laugh harder.

            Brian parked in front of a sidewalk café, and the two sat down with steaming cups of coffee.  “So what did you want to talk to me about?”


            “I figured as much.  I wondered when the two of you would drift back together after he left that weasel.”

            “I take it you didn’t like Ethan.”

            “God no!  I thought he was an arrogant prick.”  Brian laughed at the words coming out of the young woman’s mouth.

            “Yeah, but aren’t I an arrogant prick too?”

            “Of course you are, but you never made Justin lie.  You never made him pretend to be your cousin and me his girlfriend so some interviewer wouldn’t know you were queer.  You never lied to him.”

            “What happened?”

            “That’s Justin’s place to tell you, not mine.”

            “So if he left the fiddle player, why didn’t he come back home to me?”

            Back home to me, Daphne thought that was an odd choice or words.  “He should come back to you with your romantic sentiments like ‘I want to fuck you.’”

            Brian had the decency to look a little chagrined, “He told you about that?”

            “Of course he tells me everything.”

            Brian’s eyes widened at that, Daphne just stared back at him, “Wow, I’m amazed you would even talk to me, if he told you ‘everything.’”

            “I should hate you for all the shit you pulled, but I don’t because I know how much you love him.”

            Brian’s eyes narrowed at the girl, “I never said …”

            “You forget Brian, I was there too.  There were three people at that prom, and only one of us can’t remember it.”  Brian’s face wore a blank expression as Daphne continued, “You were in love with him that night.  The way you looked at him, with love not lust in your eyes.  You actually smiled, not your usual smirk.  And afterwards, everything you did for him, letting him move in, the computer, paying for school, everything.  You practically screamed that you loved him.”

            Brian asked softly, “Then why did he leave?”

            “You also did a lot of shitty stuff to him.  I remember walking in on you doing that guy on the couch.  It crushed him, not five minutes before he had been talking about great things were between you.  It’s like you would do nice things for him, and he would start to have faith in your relationship, in how you felt about him, but then you would do something really nasty and knock him on his ass, figuratively speaking.  I think he just got tired of it.”

            Brian sat really quietly, contemplating what Daphne had told him.  She reached over and rested her hand on his arm, “I think he wants to come home, you just need to give him a reason to.”




            His conversation with Daphne had wiped him out.  After dropping the girl off at her apartment, Brian just decided to go home.  He had hoped he could get Justin back, and they could just continue as before, but he realized now that they couldn’t.  The only way Justin would come home was if he was being offered a real, equal, permanent, monogamous relationship.  “Fuck!” he screamed to no one in particular.

            He couldn’t remember how many times he’d interacted with Daphne in the two years he was with Justin, but she sure had great insight into their relationship.  Damn, he thought, did I really say the “R” word?  Daphne was right about one thing, well a lot of things, but one thing in particular.  The prom.  He had been in love with Justin that night, and he had forgotten that she was there.  He figured his secret was safe as long as Justin didn’t remember.  He could never be held to what he felt that night, because no one knew.  But it was true, three people were there and only one didn’t remember.

            She was right about all the other things too.  He would do nice things for Justin, and he could feel the boy coming closer, and feeling more secure.  Then he would freak out, and do something to push Justin away, Brian didn’t want anyone that close to him.  God, no wonder he left, you can only get played like a yo-yo so many times before you tire of it.

            If he wanted Justin back, he would have to face his fears and accept that what he felt for Justin was real.  He would have to trust Justin with his heart and pray it wouldn’t get broken.  Justin had given Brian his heart long ago, Brian could do no less.  He started formulating his plan.




            The next morning, Brian pulled out Justin’s school schedule.  PIFA had sent it along with the payment receipt after he paid Justin’s tuition.  He should have known then that it wasn’t really over.  He kept doing little things that would keep Justin tied to him, the tuition, the Carnival poster etc.  Looking over the schedule, he found that Justin had a free period at ten.  He called Cynthia, and told her he would be in late.  He hopped in the car and headed off to PIFA, making on quick stop on the way.

            If Brian remembered correctly, Justin spent his free periods on the lawn in the quad.  He liked to sit on the grass and sketch.  Brian strode across the campus, and found the blonde exactly where he was supposed to be.  Justin’s back was to him.  Brian knew if he did this, there would be no turning back.  He walked up behind his Sunshine, and allowed the petals of the feather rose he carried to brush against Justin’s cheek.  The gesture startled the blonde and he quickly turned around, “Brian!  What are you doing here?”

            Brian handed Justin the rose, “I wanted to ask you to have dinner with me tonight.”

            Justin was taken aback.  He looked at Brian suspiciously, he had learned the hard way that gestures like this of Brian’s could have crushing outcomes.  As though he could read his mind, Brian spoke, “No ulterior motives Sunshine, just dinner.”

            Deciding to take a chance, “Ok, where should I meet you?”

            “I’ll pick you up, still staying at Daphne’s?”

            “Yeah, let me give you the address.”

            “I’ll pick you up at seven.” Brian started to walk away.

            “Brian,” the ad-exec turned around, “what should I wear?”

            “Something nice.”  Brian quickly turned around before the smirk on his face turned into a full-fledged grin.



            “Cynthia!”  Brian barked as he got into the office, “my office, now!”

            “Jesus Brian, you are such a bitch before you have your morning coffee.  Since you were coming in late, you could have stopped.”

            “Shut up, close the door.”

            Cynthia did as he asked, and rolled her eyes at her boss.  “What do you want?”

            For a second, Brian looked nervous.  Cynthia had never seen Brian nervous.  “I need your help to plan a romantic evening.”

            He murmured it so low that Cynthia wasn’t sure she had heard him correctly, “A romantic evening?  For two?”

            Brian just glared at her, “Yes, a romantic evening for two, ok?”

            “Does this mean that you’re finally going to get your head out of your ass and fix things with Justin?”

            This got Brian’s attention.  What did Cynthia know about Justin?  He never talked about that part of his life around the office.

            Cynthia could read his thoughts.  “Of course I know about Justin.  You don’t think I noticed when Justin Taylor was added to your list of people whose calls you would take at anytime?  Michael and Lindsey were alone on that list for years.  So I knew Justin had to be important.  You don’t think I noticed when I would call you at home and someone else would answer the phone?  You don’t think we all noticed how much nicer you were around here?  Oh you were still an asshole, but not quite as big of one.  You don’t think I noticed the tuition statements coming from Pittsburgh Institute of Fine Arts, I know you weren’t a student?  And finally you don’t think I noticed six months ago when the old Brian Kinney returned, only a little bit meaner, and the calls from Justin stopped?  I may be blonde, but I am not stupid.”

            Brian was shocked.  Apparently he didn’t hide his personal life as well as he thought.  “So do you have any ideas?”

            “Well there are plenty of restaurants that have a romantic ambience, but I think you could host a beautiful romantic evening at the loft.  Candles, flowers, soft music and a great dinner.”

            “Will you help me?”

            “I’ll need the rest of the day off, keys to your place and your credit card.”

            Christ this was going to be expensive.




            Justin was sitting on the couch in deep thought when Teri got home.  “Hey Justin, what’s up?”

            “Oh, hey Ter, not much.”

            “Well you look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

            “Just stuff on my mind.”

            “Like what?”

            “Brian asked me out to dinner.”

            “Brian, Brian?”  Teri had met Justin after he broke up with Brian, but she had heard a lot about him from Daphne.

            “Yeah, and it just has me so confused.”  He looked at the feather rose he had been holding all afternoon.

            “Maybe he wants you back.”

            “And I would love to go back, but I don’t know if I can.  The hardest thing I ever did was leave him.  It ripped my heart out.  I can’t go back to the same situation.”

            “Did he give you that?”  she indicated the rose Justin was holding.  He nodded.  “Well from what I’ve heard, he doesn’t do romantic gestures, so maybe he wants something different too.”

            “I guess I’ll find out tonight.” 

            Their conversation was interrupted by Daphne coming home.  Justin got up to take a shower.  Daphne looked questioningly at Teri, “What’s with him?”

            “Brian is taking him out today.”

            “No kidding, he’s actually going to give it a shot!”

            “What do you know about it?”

            “He came to see me yesterday.”


            “Yeah, he told me that he wanted Justin back.  We had a long talk, but to summarize it, I told him the only way Justin would even consider it was if some major changes were made.”

            “So I’m going to finally meet the infamous Brian Kinney.”

            “You’d better prepare yourself, that man can knock you off your feet just by looking at you.”

            “Please Daph, I’ve seen Justin’s sketches, I know what he looks like.”

            “Trust me Ter, Brian on paper and Brian in real life, are very different.”




            Brian got home at four, and found the loft transformed.  Cynthia had put out votive candles over every surface.  She’d changed the light bulbs to give off a soft romantic glow.  He found Cynthia in the kitchen cooking.  “Wow, Cyn this is amazing.”

            She looked over at him, “Thank you, I try.  My mom is a party planner, I used to help her a lot when I was in school.”

            “The food smells delicious.”

            “I hope you guys like it.  I was going to get a bunch of flowers, but then I remembered Justin’s allergies.”

            “How did you know about that?”

            “Jesus Brian, do you think its fairy elves that do all the mundane stuff for you.  How many times have I filled prescriptions for you?  Do you think I didn’t notice when I started getting refills for allergy medicine listed under Justin Taylor.”

            Brian felt like a shit.  Cynthia kept his office life running very smoothly, the same way Justin had smoothly handled things at home.  He had taken them both for granted.  “Cynthia I’m sorry.  You’ve done so much for me over the years, and I’ve never thanked you.”

            “Don’t get all mushy on me boss, it will ruin your image.  Now go get ready.”

            Two hour later, Brian emerged from his room as Cynthia was finishing up things in the kitchen.  “Don’t worry Brian, I’ll be out of here before you get back.  I’ve put the serving dishes in the oven on warm.  I’ve thought of a perfect entrance.  Ring the loft when you’re leaving, just let it ring once.  I’ll go outside, when I’ve seen you go inside, I’ll call your cell.  That way you can hand Justin your keys to open the door while you take the call, that way he’ll be the first one inside.”

            “Sounds perfect.  Thanks Cynthia, I owe you.”

            “Don’t worry, I’ll think of a way to collect.”

            Brian laughed as she gave him a quick hug.




            Brian felt nervous as he walked up to Daphne’s fourth floor apartment.  He felt like a teenager, and he didn’t like it one bit.  He almost laughed earlier when Justin was giving him Daph’s address.  He almost gave himself away by saying he knew where she lived.  Justin would be livid if he knew that Brian had talked to Daphne.  Swallowing the lump that was forming in his throat, he knocked on the door.

            “I’ll get it!”  The door opened and he was greeted by a pretty red-haired girl.  She must be Daphne’s roommate, “Hi you must be …”

            Teri’s words stopped as she got a look at Brian.  Daphne was right, Brian on paper was nothing compared to Brian in the flesh.  The man before her was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.  His auburn hair had that “just rolled out of bed look” and his eyes were a beautiful shade of hazel.  The only way to describe them was “bedroom eyes.”  But it was his lips that fascinated her.  They were full and raspberry colored.  Teri could just imagine what it was like to be kissed by those lips.

            Brian noticed the girl’s reaction, and laughed inwardly.  Another member of the straight girls for Brian Kinney club.  “Hi, I’m Brian.”

            “Umm, hi, umm I’m Teri, Daphne’s roommate.”

            “It’s nice to meet you.”  Daphne came into the living room at that moment.  She chuckled seeing her roommate’s reaction to Brian.  Oh well, she tried to warn her.

            “Hey Brian, you look amazing.”  And he did.  He was wearing a pair of light linen, black pants that gracefully draped down from his hips.  He had on a dark red silk shirt and his black ¾ leather coat.  He remembered that Justin loved him in red and black.

            “Hey Daph,” he pressed a kiss to her cheek.

            “Justin, Brian’s here.”   

            Justin stepped into the room.  Brian could only stare.  The artist was dressed in a crème colored pair of linen slacks and a royal blue silk sweater that brought out his eyes.  He was beautiful.  “Umm, hey Bri.”

            “Hi, are you ready to go?”

            “Yeah, let me grab my coat.”  Brian took advantage of Justin turning away to dial the loft to signal Cynthia.

            As the two men left, Teri just sighed, “My god Daphne, he is amazing.  Are you sure he’s gay?”

            “Yeah, I’m sure.”

            “Wow, what a shame for straight women everywhere.”

            “Actually, I have seen him naked.”

            “What?!?!?”  The two friends laughed as Daphne recalled her first visit to the loft.



            Brian opened Justin’s door for him and they climbed into the Vette.  He noticed Justin’s silence.  Brian decided to not read too much into it, he supposed if the roles were reversed he would be silent too.  “I forgot something at the loft, do you mind if we stop there before dinner.”

            “Umm, no, that fine.”

            Brian pulled in front of the building.  “Do you want me to wait here?”

            “No come up.”

            Justin hoped Brian wasn’t trying to get him upstairs to fuck.  He was really confused about what was going on, and sex would only deepen that confusion.  They rode the elevator up.  As they reached the loft door, Brian’s phone rang.  He handed Justin the keys, “Can you open the door, while I take this real quick?”

            “Sure,” Justin took the keys and unlocked the door.

            “Good luck Brian,” was all Cynthia said into the phone.

            Justin opened the door, and walked in.  The sight that greeted him was beautiful.  The loft was bathed in soft white light, with candles everywhere.  Soft jazz music was playing quietly on the stereo.  The dining room table was set with china and crystal.  He turned around, “Brian?”

            Brian reached and took Justin’s coat, “Let’s have dinner.”

            Brian held out Justin’s chair for him and then uncorked a bottle of wine.  He pulled the serving dishes from the oven.  Cynthia had prepared fresh Caesar salad and Beef Burgandy with rosemary potatoes and asparagus.  Brian served the plates, and proposed a toast before they started eating, “To you.”

            Justin just nodded, he didn’t trust his voice.  The two men ate.  At first there was an uncomfortable silence, but then they began talking. About nothing, just work and school and gossiping about their friends.  After they finished, Brian cleared the table and refilled their wine glasses.  He reached for Justin’s hand and led him to the sofa.  The two men sat down.  “Brian what is going on?  What’s this all about?”

            “When I first found out you had broke things off with Ethan, I expected you to show up here, wanting to come back.  I had it all prepared.  I would be an asshole, let you grovel a little bit, and then make the magnanimous gesture of taking you back, same rules applying of course.”  He saw Justin hang his head, so he continued, “but that didn’t happen.  So then I started seeing you at Babylon.  The other night, I figured if I could fuck you, you would remember how great we were together and want to come back.  Same rules.  Well you told me what I could do with that plan.  I finally realized there was no way to get you back unless I wanted to change some things.  I realized you wouldn’t come back to the situation that you had left.  I had to decide what I wanted, and it finally came to me.  I want you to come home.”

            Justin was silent, and the silence was deafening.  Brian was sure his heart was going to beat out his chest while he waited for Justin to speak.  “Are things going to be any different Brian?  I love you and I always have, but I can’t go back.  I compromised so much of myself to be with you.  I gave up things I wanted and accepted things I didn’t want because I thought I had to in order to be with you.  It nearly destroyed me.  I became someone I didn’t recognize, and I had to get out before I was lost forever.  Now here you are asking me to come home, but what home?  This was never my home, it was always yours.  I just stayed here for awhile.  So I have to ask Brian, what are you asking, what are you offering me?  Another deal, more rules?  I can’t do that again.”

            Brian looked down, before looking up into the blue eyes he loved so much, “I’m asking for locks on our doors.  I’m asking for no curfews, because I want us to always come home together.  I’m asking for your love and trust again.  I’m offering you my heart because you gave me yours so long ago, and I can do no less.”

            “Why did you give me a feather rose?”

            “Well I figured it was the first time I had ever given you flowers.  I didn’t want it to die in a day.”

            The blue eyes were shimmering with tears that threatened to fall.  Brian reached out and caught the first tear, “No tears baby.”

            He leaned in and captured Justin’s lips in a kiss so soft and so full of promise.  He took Justin’s hand and led him up the stairs to the bedroom.  Justin looked around.  “The bed is new.”

            “It was delivered today.  It’s a new start baby, a bed that only you and I will be in.”  Justin launched himself into Brian’s arms.

            Brian was surprised by the lack of urgency he felt.  He’d assumed his first time with Justin, after so long apart would be rushed.  He didn’t want to rush, he wanted to savor every second that he held Justin in his arms.  Their love-making was slow and full of promise.  It was something Brian had never experienced.  The closest they had come to this was the night after Gus’s birthday when Justin remembered the attack.  But this was different.  “I love you Justin.”  This was their future.  The two men fell asleep in each other’s arms.

            A few hours later, Brian woke up to find his lover gone.  He panicked for a second that Justin had left, but then he saw Justin standing at the window.  The soft light illuminated his lover’s pale skin.  Brian walked up silently and wrapped his arms around his baby.  He rested his chin on the top of Justin’s head.  “What are you thinking about?”

            “This feels like home.”




            The next morning, Brian dropped Justin off at Daphne’s.  He would have liked to take the day off, but there were a few meeting scheduled that he could not miss.  He secured a promise from Justin that he would move his belongings back into the loft today.  Justin agreed that he would.  He didn’t have any classes on Friday and neither did Teri or Daphne, so they could help him.  Stealing one more kiss from his sunshine, Brian sped off to work.




            Justin silently entered the apartment.  Since Teri and Daph had Friday’s off, they tended to party on Thursday nights, and he didn’t want to wake them.  What surprised him was to find the two girls waiting for him on the couch drinking coffee.

            “Well since you didn’t come home last night, I am going to assume last night went very well?”

            Justin blushed at Daphne’s words, “Yeah it did.”

            “So?”  Teri was bursting with curiosity.

            “Well, you guys have to help me move today.”

            Both girls jumped up and hugged Justin.  They were like his sisters and were thrilled that he had his man back.

            “You’re not going to miss my show tonight are you?”  Teri was in a band, and they had their first gig tonight at a bar on campus, “I mean I would understand, but …”

            “Of course I won’t miss it, I’m part of your road crew.”

            “You could bring Brian,” she was dying to see the man again.  Justin shook his head, he was going to get t-shirts made Straight Girls for Brian Kinney.

            “I don’t think so Ter.  Spending a Friday night at a college bar listening to a bar band is definitely not Brian Kinney’s style.”

            Daphne nodded her head in agreement.

            “Don’t worry Ter, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time to see him, just because I’m moving out doesn’t mean we won’t see each other.  Besides, Brian and I fight all the time, so I’m sure this couch hasn’t seen the last of me.”

            The three friends dissolved into giggles.




            Cynthia was getting antsy.  She was anxious for Brian to come in, she was dying to know how the evening went.  When he finally appeared, the “Justin Taylor Era” Brian Kinney was back.  He stopped at her desk and kissed her on the cheek.  He dropped a jewelry box on her desk and whispered, “Thanks” before going into his office.

            Cynthia barged through the door, “You are not off the hook that easy Kinney.”

            Brian smiled, he knew this was coming, “He’s moving home today.”

            Cynthia gave him a big hug, “Thank god!”

            Brian laughed with her, “Wow, you must be hard up for gossip, you didn’t even open your thank you present.”

            Cynthia looked at the box she still held in her hand.  She opened the box and found a perfect diamond solitare hanging on a gold chain, “Brian, this is beautiful.”

            “It’s my way of saying thank you.”

            “It was my pleasure, believe me I will benefit from this reconciliation as much as you will.”

            The hours dragged by as Brian was forced to sit in meetings.  All he could think about was his baby.  He wondered if he got everything moved ok.  Finally at two-o-clock he called.  “Hey baby!”

            “Hey Bri!”

            “Get everything moved ok?”

            “Yeah we just finished.”

            “Great, do you want to go to Babylon or Woody’s tonight?”

            “Umm, actually I can’t, I have plans.”

            Brian was not expecting this, “What kind of plans?”

            Justin rolled his eyes on his end, “Plans that I had made before last night that I can’t change.”

            “Well what are you doing?”

            “Participating in a gay orgy.”

            “Justin,” Brian said warningly.

            “Just kidding baby.  Teri is in a band and they have their first gig tonight at a bar on campus.  I promised I would be there.”

            “Well, I’ll go with you.”

            “Brian, a college bar is not your style.”

            “Well I want to be where you are.  So if you’re going to be at some hetero college bar, then I guess I will be too.  What time?”

            “They start at ten.”

            “We can have dinner before then.”

            “Actually no, I’m kind of a roadie, I have to help them set up.  How about you meet us?”

            Brian rolled his eyes, exasperated, “Ok, give me the directions.”

            Brian knew he had it bad for the young blonde.  He didn’t hang out at college bars even when he was in college.  It was going to be a long night.




            Brian arrived at the bar around nine-thirty.  He found Justin and Daphne and they got a table.  “Did you ‘roadies’ get everything set up?”

            The two friends laughed, “Yeah, but Teri is a basket case.”

            Daphne spoke in defense of her friend, “She’s really good, but the only one who doesn’t realize it is her.”

            The next two hours flew by.  Brian had to admit he was having a good time.  Teri’s band was really good.  They did mostly cover songs, but they did them well.  The only thing Brian didn’t like was that he couldn’t be affectionate with Justin.  The frat boy/sorority girl crowd did not allow for gay PDA’s.  Two songs that Teri sang hit Brian hard.  The first he thought could have been Justin’s words to him.


I spent years and all this time
thinking I was better off cuz you were mine
You always said it was your way or the highway
So I'm shiftin my life into drive
I'm getting out kissing the past good-bye
Like Toby said, "How do you like me now?"
This conversation has run dry
And I keep telling myself

There's more to me than you
 Don't underestimate what I can do
Well I'm alright, it's okay
I know I'll make it through
Cuz there's more to me than you

I'm not saying I'm battered and bruised
but I might as well be with the words you used
I believe in myself, that makes me stronger
Things changed and so have I
I'm gonna make hay while the sun still shines
You can clip my wings, but I'm still gonna fly
I'm on my own and on my way
And I keep telling myself

There's more to me than you
Don't underestimate what I can do
Well I'm alright, it's okay
I know I'll make it through
Cuz there's more to me than you

There was always something that meant more to you than me
And I'm just sorry it's taking this for you to see

There's more to me than you
Don't underestimate what I can do
Well I'm alright, it's okay
I know I'll make it through
Cuz there's more to me than you
There's more to me than you
There's more to me than you


            That song seemed like Justin screaming out to him.  Brian knew that for a long time, Justin had been defined by being the one trick that Brian Kinney let stay.  Sometimes even Brian felt that way, but it wasn’t true.  Justin was an amazing talented man in his own right.  There was so much more to him than being Brian’s ‘trick who never left’ and Brian finally realized it.  That was part of the reason he knew he had to make changes.  Justin had a whole life ahead of him, and if Brian wanted to be included in that, he needed to learn about Justin’s world.  Because there was more to Justin Taylor than Brian Kinney.

            The second song was a sappy romantic piece.  The kind he imagined heteros and straights sang to each other.  However, it described how Brian felt whenever Justin was beside him.


Maybe, tonight, we could close the door and lock ourselves inside
Take time to feel
I don’t wanna miss the chance to be so real
The days all fly away
And I forget the truth
Everything that matters is in this room

When you lie next to me
Breathin’ the air I breathe
We don’t have to speak
And just be
Our love’s a precious thing
Don’t wanna waste a day
Or one more minute
Without you in it
Life if so sweet
When you lie next to me

My heart is yours
But every part of me still wants to give you more
More time to love
Cause you never know when life will leave us
I wanna take in all the beauty here
Let the world around us just disappear

When you lie next to me
Breathin’ the air I breathe
We don’t have to speak
And just be
Our love’s a precious thing
Don’t wanna waste a day
Or one more minute
Without you in it
Life if so sweet
When you lie next to me

When you lie next to me
Breathin’ the air I breathe
We don’t have to speak
And just be
Our love’s a precious thing
Don’t wanna waste a day
Or one more minute
Without you in it
Life if so sweet
When you lie next to me

            Brian shook his head at the ridiculously romantic thoughts, but the blonde did that to him.  He glanced over at Justin who was talking to Daphne.  He gave Justin a brief caress on his leg and was rewarded by that smile.

            The band finally finished around midnight.  Although Brian enjoyed it, he needed to get to Liberty Avenue.  He wanted to be on his turf so he could hold and kiss his lover and not worry about getting the shit beat out of him.

            Teri came to their table, flushed by the success of the night.  Brian kissed her on the cheek and she blushed.  “You were great.  I hate to break up this party, but I have got to get somewhere that I can act like a fag and not worry about getting into a fight.  So ladies, how would you feel about heading out.  Dancing at Babylon.”

            Teri looked at Daphne for help.  Daphne eyed Brian with a knowing glance.  “Well Ter, would you like to go to a club where you can see beautiful, half naked men dancing and not have to worry once about getting picked up?  A place where you can just enjoy the scenery?”

            “Let’s go!”  The four friends headed off to Babylon.




            Daphne had forgotten how much she loved going to Babylon.  She was such a fag hag.  She loved watching the beautiful men around her.  Teri was having sensory overload.  Brian got them in without having to wait in line, and without ID.  As soon as they walked in, Brian dragged Justin out onto the dance floor.  Daph and Teri headed over to the bar to get drinks.

            Teri was enjoying all the eye candy around her.  She shared as much with Daphne.  “Just wait Ter, the temperature on that dance floor is about to rise about 50 degrees.”

            “What are you talking about?”  

            Daphne gestured to the dance floor where Babylon’s Royal Couple was taking their thrones.  Justin and Brian began the subtle seduction that always brought Babylon to its knees.  All the queers in Pittsburgh had followed the romance with great interest, and were thrilled to have a new chapter.


            She turned when she heard her name called.  Emmett and Ted were heading over towards her.  Emmett engulfed the girl in a big hug.  “I haven’t seen you in ages, what are you doing here?  Who is this cutie?” he gestured to Teri, “Did you switch teams?”

            “Yeah Em, sex with Justin turned me off men completely.  This is my roommate Teri.”

            Emmett shook Teri’s hand, “We came with Justin and Brian.”

            That remark cause Ted to take notice, “Justin and Brian?”

            “Justin and Brian are here?  Together?”  Daphne gestured out to the dance floor where the men were dancing, lost in their world of seduction.

            “Well, well, well, Liberty Avenue’s Royal Couple has reclaimed their throne.”

            This confused Teri, “Royal Couple?”

            “Sweetie, let me tell you a story …”  Emmett began to weave his tale about the two men who were dancing.  Oblivious to the stir they were causing, the two men just stared into each others eyes.  Both of them were thinking the same thought, This feels like home.


The End

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“There’s More To Me Than You” words and music by: Jessica Andrews/James T. Slater/Marcel Chagnon

“When You Lie Next To Me” words and music by: Kellie Coffey, Gerald Derstine and Trina Harmon.