Ballz& Babez

Brina sat on the couch agonizing on how to tell Justin what he had to tell him. He knew it wouldn't be easy. He was very afraid he'd loose his bone smuggling partner. Brian feared that Justin would see him as less of a cock crusader. When the door rattled open he practically jumped out of his skin. Justin trudged in looking so tired.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Justin we need to talk."

"Can we do it later? I want to take a shower. I smell like the brown plate special."

Brian sighed "yeah sure."

Justin headed towards the shower by the conflicted look on Brian's face it must be something important. Justin didn't particularly care at the moment. He stunk and he didn't feel well so the world could just fuck off. Justin took his time in the shower making sure all his bits were squeaky clean. When Justin came out dressed and a bit more refreshed he joined Brina in the living room.

"So you wanted to tell me something?"

"Well I was at the eye doctor having my eyes checked when the doctor discovered that I had a lump in my testicle. So I went to my cardiologist and my proctologist and even to my Florist and they all said the same thing."

"I didn't know you have a Florist."

"Well it's not something I like to talk about. Anyway I'm scheduled to have my testicle removed tomorrow do you still love me?"

Just then Justin bolted to the bathroom and through up everything he ate that day and the day before. When Justin came back pale as milk and a bit weak he saw Brina sobbing on the couch.

Brina wailed "I knew you wouldn't love me any more! You think I'm less of a man now, I'm going to be neutered and you don't even care you selfish fuck!"

"Brina shut the fuck up. I don't give a rat's ass if you have one ball or ten. I'm not feeling well and could really give a flying fuck right now what's between your legs."

Brina just sobbed louder.

"Geeze fucking Christ I'm going to Daphne's where I can puke in peace."

Brian was left all alone or at least he thought he was.

"Now you've gone and done it, way to go."

Brina looked up. "Vic…. But your ded!"

"Of course I' am. Can't you two ever get along for a few minutes? I mean really."

"Vic am I going to die?"

"How the fuck should I know. I just go around haunting old queens… Boo"

"Are you saying I'm old?"

"If the frilly pink pump fits."

Brina was even more depressed than he had ben previously.

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Justin sat in the waiting room. He was grumpy and still nauseous but he was going to be their for his man. After all he was loosing a nut. He waited what seemed like days but it was more like seven hours. Finally a blood soaked doctor and his ASSisting nurse appeared.

"Are you hear for Mr. Kinney?"

"Yes is he ok?"

"Um define ok" the doctor looked guilty.

Justin's temper flared. "What did you do to my love monkey?"

"Well I've been up for 72 hours and I was drunk so sue me I cut off the wrong ball. So then I had to cut off the other one which was the right one so now he has nun."

"You made Brina fucking Kinney a eunuch!

"Calm down we can fix it. He just needs a testicle transplant and the sooner the better. No one likes stale nuts!"

Suddenly the room was filled with Concerned Citizens for Brian Kinney's Testicles. The whole gang was their. The patrons of Babylon and Woodies. Everyone was vying for the chance to give up a ball for Kinney.

Justin looked around bewildered. "How did you guys find out so fast?"

Deb popped her cum with a horsy smack. "You know how gay news travels. It's already front page news in the local fag rag.

The doctor spoke to Justin "Since he is your partner we'll test you first to see if you are a match."

Mickey screeched "I'm his bestist friend we have to be a match."

Ted grumbled "He can have mine I'm not using them."

Deb boomed "He can have mine although they might be to big."

Hunter cried "I want him to have mine, cuz he's hot!"

The nurse ran tests on Justin then ran still more tests. By the time Justin was done all he wanted to do was see Brina. He was shown Brina's room and he all but collapsed in a chair by Brina's bed.

"How are you feeling Pookie?"

"I feel empty inside" Brina whimpered.

"Well I have some bad news and good news and news that I don't know how the fuck you're going to take."

"Just give it to me striate I can take it like a man."

"Well the sleep deprived doctor cut off the wrong testicle so he ended up having to cut off both. "

Brina's expression was very similar to the kid from Home Alone. "I have no nuts!"

"Not currently no but they are going to do an emergency transplant just as soon as they find a double match. The good news is I'm a match."

"Oh sweetie you'd give up a testicle for me?"

Justin kissed him sweetly on the mouth. "Of course I would that way you'll always have a part of me wherever you go. And hey you'll have the testicle of a twenty year old. Um there's something else I have to tell you lambskin honey bear pookie chops."

"Am I going to like this?" Brina asked suddenly afraid.

"While they were testing me to see if I was a match they ran some other tests. They took a urine sample, semen sample and they took my rectal temperature and I'm pregnant."

Brian sat there stunned. "Is it mine?"

Justin slapped Brina's arm. "Of course it's fucking yours it sure ain't the male mans. I've still got my balls I don't have to give one to you."

"I'm sorry Jussy pookie pie it's just such a shock."

"Yeah well that explains why I can't keep anything down and my hormones are sky high. I'll let you get some rest now."

"Are you sure it won't hurt the baby to have this surgery? I want you safe and around for a very long time."

"Me and the baby will be fine."

"Just promise me one thing don't let them use Ted's ball I'd rather have cat nuts than his."

Justin kissed the tip of his nose. "Ok sweet heart."

After Justin left Vic the ghost popped up. "Boy the Colon Crusader with out his jewels that has to hurt." Vic floated a bed pan past Brina's head.

"Can't you find someone else to haunt. I've had a hard day. I've lost both testicles and my lover is pregnant."

"What can I say I'm board. Sometimes it's down right boring being a ghost. I mean there is only so many times I can hide Deb's wig and goose Rodney before that gets old. By the way Boo" Vic chuckled "Man now that doesn't get old."

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Emmett and Justin were quickly prepped for surgery both were a match. The operation was done by a more reliable doctor. The nuts were extracted and transplanted successfully.

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Mickey was so depressed that he couldn't donate his little peanut of a ball to his bestest friend in the whole wide world that he found himself wandering aimlessly. He was in the very bad part of town which was only a block away from the good part of town. Suddenly he was tackled to the ground and restrained. Something gooie was shoved into his mouth, he soon passed out.

When he woke he was naked in a tiney closet like room. Their was only a little bed and a kitty litter pan in the room. Suddenly the door swung open. Ethan lounged in the doorway. He wore nothing but an animal print thong. It had stains of an unknown origin all over it. Ethan scratched the fuz lint that was on his face.

"Let me out of here" Mikey whaled.

"Um no you are going to be my sex slave. You see looking the way I do I can't get laid. So I'm forced to kidnap unsuspecting miscreants such as your self. I have needs damn it! Would it help if I told you I loved you?"

"Well maybe" Mickey squeaked.

"Great I want you to give Wolfram a blow job while I play with my meat flute, my one eyed moisture missile needs draining. Oh wait a second" Ethan held one hand to his ear. "I think my muse's are talking to me." He lowered his thong. His crabs were definitely whispering yet another violin piece of great proportions to him. "I must go but I shall return!" Ethan stuffed a pacifier into Mikey's mouth then he was left in the dark closet.

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Ben red the latest review for his book he crumpled up the paper in his fist so tight that blood started to soak the paper. All his Zen techniques were thrown out the window. He would not be mocked or laughed at again. He did an internet search and compiled a list of everyone who ever said a bad word about his book. He packed up his oozy and was out the door. Ben looked up the first address. He rode his bike up the drive way to a mediocre looking house in the suburbs. Ben rang the door bell and waited. A scraggly looking girl in her 20's answered the door.

"Hello are you Marry Sue Waddsworth Gulidernstern the 4th?"

"Yeah."

"And did you say and I quote RU12 was a flaming pile of excrement with no plot and a dumb title. It was a waist of your very important day and you'll never get those precious moments back. Further more the book was so bad you wouldn't line your cat box with the pages of it?"

"I guess I mean that was like a month ago man."

Ben nodded and whipped up his oozy and blue her away. He went on to look up the next address.

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Hunter was so depressed that he wasn't a match he decided to go to familiar territory, the glory hole factory. But the littlest hustler never made it, he was abducted by aliens.

"Hey you green mother fuckers let me go! What are you doing down there Stop! Fuck! What the fuck are you doing with that probe Noooooooo!"

When Hunter was beamed back down to earth he was cured of his HIV but he soon discovered that the evil aliens had given him a sex change. Hunter was last seen running down Liberty wailing "Nooooo not Bush!"

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Brian and Justin were home from the hospital and doing well. The testicle transplant was a success although Brina had yet to have an erection. Knowing that his balls came from two bottoms made him feel more like a lesbian than ever. Plus his bag looked like Frankenstein's all stitched up. He didn't feel sexy. Also the fact that Justin's hormones were driving him crazy. First he couldn't stand to be touched, and then he was practically glued to his side. At any time he was hot, cold, tired, hungry, and horney. Keeping up with a pregnant Justin was exhausting. They already went through a case of double D batteries when Justin was horney.

"I'm hungry" Justin complained.

"Just a minute love muffin I'll make you eggs and waffles."

Justin poured himself a glass of milk. He happened to look at the carton. "Hey Mickey's on the carton, did you know he was missing?'

"No my little honey pot."

Brina placed the heaping plate in front of Justin.

"I'm not hungry any more."

Brian sighed.

"Boo" Vic murmured over Brina's left shoulder.

It took a while to read Taylorism's but he finally got the hang of it. He snuggled with Justin and stroked his growing belly. He left when Justin was in a rage and didn't want to be toughed. He did everything he could to please his partner even nude had stands to amuse him.

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"Brian fuck your pride! Fuck your manhood! Take the damn pills. A vibrating buttplug just isn't going to cut it. I need your crème filled meat stick in my man pussy Now!

"But Justin I don't want to take Ted's Viagra."

"To bad I want to ride your sex pistol."

Brian sighed and swallowed the blue pill.

Justin was on him mewling like a little sex kitten. He was humping and grinding against his leg. As soon as he was hard Justin slapped a condom on his purple passion pump, opened up his anus hole and sat down hard.

"Fuck Justin take it easy you don't want to hurt the baby."

"The baby's fine shut up and fuck the shit out of me daddy!"

Brian got Justin down on all fours and began to bang him with his meat trudgen.

"Oh yes Daddy ram my man hole ahhhh yesss! Harder, harder pound my pink quivering man pussy!"

"Ohhh Pookie squeeze my bratwurst."

Justin shuddered and sprayed his love juice all over Brian's pillow. Brina came like a Gale force filling the condom to capacity and beyond thanks to his 20 something's testicles.

"BOOOOOO" Vic wailed.

"Eeek cut it out" Brian hollered.

"What the fuck?"

"We need to find someone who can perform and exorcism Vic keeps haunting my ass."

They snuggled in each others arms all wet and sticky.

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Even though it wasn't legal Brina wanted to symbolically marry Justin before the baby was born. He wanted his child to be born into a loving family and home. So one night when the stars were properly aligned Brian cooked dinner and lit candles. He flicked on the radio to the soothing sounds of the seventies. He wined and dined Justin making him feel like the little princess he was. Brian got down on one knee and presented platinum bands to his one true love.

"Justin will you marry me?"

"Well it's about time! Of course I'll marry you."

Justin pulled Birna up and into a deep kiss.

"Justin I've loved you since I first saw you standing there under the street light looking like a teenaged hustler."

Justin whipped a tear from his eye. "Oh Brian that's so incredibly sweet. I knew I loved you before I even met you. I had the time of my life stalking your skinny ass till you submitted to me."

"I'll always submit to you baby."

They exchanged rings and kissed deeply and passionately for endless moments.

Vic cheered "yippy woooo hoooo!"

"Can I fuck you now?" Justin asked devilishly.

"Of course you can, pookie bear just be gentle with my delicate bud."

"Yeeeh Haaawwww! Bend over Brina!"

They had loud raunchy sex that could be heard for several blocks.

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One day out of the blue Brina felt a twitch then a stirring. He looked down and almost jumped for joy. Hot damn he finally had an erection! He ran into the bedroom.

"Justin, Justin look I've got wood!"

Justin glared at him. "Well this is a fine time to be sporting wood you fucker, my water just broke."

"What!"

"Get me to the hospital you dumbfuck!"

Justin stood up with a squish. Brian grabbed up the over night bag and ushered Justin down to the Jeep.

"Honey bear could you try not to get baby goo on the seats I just had them steam cleaned."

Justin growled at him menisingly. Brian drove like a speed demon to get Justin to the hospital. More than one red light was run.

Justin was rushed to the delivery room. Ever since the contractions started he swore like a sailor and nearly spoke in tongues. He made several nurses blush with his profanity. Even Brian was impressed and a little frightened. His feet were placed in stirrups and his hole was lubed for easier birthing. Justin had Brian's hand in a death grip.

"You mother fucking soon of a bitch. I'll castrate you!"

"But honey it's your ball you said I could have it."

"Well I'm taking it back ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh motherfucker! Will someone get me some drugs?"

Brian petted his sweaty brow. "You don't need them your allergic to everything anyway."

"You fucking whoremaster you did this to me!" Justin screamed "I'll never let you fuck me again!"

The doctor checked Justin's bulging hole. "I see a head you can push now."

Justin screamed and grunted and nearly passed out form all the pain. Brian held him in his arms and did his best to comfort him.

"One more push should do it" the doctor said.

Justin bared down and pushed with all his might. The baby came out squalling.

"It's a boy!"

Brian nearly wept with joy. "I have a son!"

"Oh my" said the nurse "doctor!"

Justin's hole was contracting again.

"Well it looks like your going to have twins!"

"What!" Brina and Justin said at the same time.

Justin tried to look between his legs in disbelief but he couldn't see over his stomach. He pushed and strained and grunted till he was near cross eyed. The second birth was harder than the first and lasted nearly an hour. Justin was relieved when the baby finally came out.

"Another son!" the doctor proclaimed. "Woops I guess your going to have triplets."

Justin glared tiredly at Brian and the doctor. "What the fuck am I a human vending machine? This is all your fault Brina. I'm never letting you near my he cunt again!"

The third birth was much easier. The baby practically flue out of Justin's stretched hole. He had given birth to a baby girl. Brian was absolutely giddy with delight. Justin felt an uncomfortable pain in his tummy which usually signaled another birth.

"Fuck not again!"

Their was a rumbling under the sheets and Justin sighed. "Oh thank God it was only gas."

Brian cradled his son and daughter while Justin rocked their other son. They looked lovingly into each others eyes. Brian knew then that Justin hadn't meant anything he'd said during the pain of labor. They loved each other and they had three new babies. Everything was just peachy.

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5 Years Later

Breanne, BJ, and Taylor were healthy, happy and well loved children. They were there parents pride and joy. Justin was a famous artist making tons of money. Kinnetik was a huge success and their were now offices in CA, NY and they were just opening another office in Canada. Brian had been sick for several days at first they thought it was just the flu. Justin had a panic attack. The thought crossed his mind that Brian's Cancer had come back, but that wasn't the case. Finally they wised up and bought the two test kits that they would need. Brian took out the first test stick. He pulled down his sweats and released his dick. He peed on the stick then waited and waited and waited some more. Finally it turned bright flaming pink. Brian skipped into the living room. He waived the stick in Justin face.

"I'm pregnant."

"Yuck get that thing out of my face. Well good for you, better you than me. Let's do the other test."

Justin took Brina by the hand and led him into the bedroom. He pulled out the other test kit which was a rectal thermometer. Brian lay on the bed on his tummy. Justin dabbed the end with lube. Brian put his butt up in the air as Justin tugged down his sweats. With his slick finger he massaged Brina's anus till the folds relaxed. Justin slipped the thermometer in then slapped Brina's ass

"Clench those cheeks lover."

Brian huffed a laugh. "Don't talk dirty to me when I'm in no position to do anything about it."

"Do you think we're ready for another kid?" Justin asked.

"Sure why not. We did pretty good with the other three. We're fanatically sound. What better time to have a kid."

While they were waiting to help pass the time Brina and Justin made out. They kissed and dry humped each other. When the thermometer beeped Justin extracted it and looked at the readout.

Justin smiled "were gonna have a baby." He kissed Brian sweetly. "First thing in the morning we're going to take you to the Vet to get you checked over, make sure the baby is ok."

"Alright sweetheart."

"Love you pookie wookie."

"Love you too Jussie bear."

THE END

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