Unbrotherly Love

Part 9

Closets

Justin gathered the books he needed and then slammed his locker shut. He started rapidly walking down the hall to his next class when he heard his name being called. He rolled his eyes, as he recognized the voice.

"What do you want, Michael, I'm going to be late for class," he said irritatedly as he kept walking, knowing that the other boy was still following him.

"Hey, Justin... I - I'm sorry for acting like such an asshole. It's just that --" Michael paused, and Justin stopped and turned to look at Michael curious as to what he would say.

"What?" Justin asked.

Michael slightly blushed, and then shook his head. "Never mind, it's not important why I said it, the point is, I shouldn't have... and I'm sorry."

Justin looked at his so-called friend's expression carefully. He couldn't help but notice how much younger the boy looked with his guilt-ridden face and nervousness. The fact that he was wearing a Spiderman T-shirt only added to the effect, and Justin held back a smirk at that thought. Surprisingly enough, the expression he wore was convincing. Justin didn't know what to make of that. It was well known that the other boy had issues with him and Brian being together. But what he had said to him and Brian at lunch time had really pissed Justin off... mostly because it was true. Still, he didn't appreciate it being thrown in his face.

"Just forget it, okay? I've gotta go," Justin waved him off. He didn't really want to deal with Michael right now, and besides, he was probably only apologizing on account of Brian. Justin had left the lunch table they had been sitting at, but he was willing to bet that Brian had went off on Michael after what he said, and now the devoted best friend was trying to get back on his good graces by apologizing to Justin.

"I mean it, Justin. I really am sorry," Michael said, looking at him with his sad puppy dog eyes for the full effect.

'Yeah, sorry excuse for a friend,' Justin thought bitterly. "All right, fine," Justin answered instead, just wanting the other boy to leave him alone. He started to turn to walk away, when Michael reached out and grabbed his arm. He looked up at him with a curious frown.

"Um, wait. I mean, are we... okay?" Michael asked with what appeared to be uncertainty and hope.

Justin sighed. "Yeah," Justin told him. Honestly though, he wasn't sure if him and Michael would ever really be okay... but he wasn't going to think about that now. He just wanted to get rid of the other boy and get to class.

Satisfied, Michael smiled at him. "Great. I'll see you later," he said, and turned to walk back down the hall in the opposite direction to go to his own class.

Justin shook his head and rushed to his AP English class. He made it just in time before the tardy bell rang, and he sighed with relief as he sat down in his seat, knowing that being late was unacceptable in Mrs. Wilkins' class and would have earned him a detention.

As Justin sat there for the next hour, though, he realized that he might as well not have been there, because all he could think of were Michael's haunting words at lunchtime. They were words that he himself had thought and felt guilty over. To hear them out loud was like a slap in the face, and he couldn't help but worry about what Brian thought about it.

After class, Justin made his way over to the parking lot to meet Brian. They met most days after school so he could catch a ride home with him, unless one of them had something else going on. Justin still didn't have his own car. Despite the fact that he'd kept up his end of the bargain by maintaining good grades throughout the first quarter of his senior year, even going above and beyond by making a 4.5 GPA, Craig had not bought Justin the car he had promised him. His father had given the excuse that things had been a little tight for him and his wife since the baby was born, but what Craig didn't know, was that long ago, Justin had overheard his parents talking, and was aware that money had been set aside so that regardless of his parents' financial status, Justin could still get a good used car. Plain and simple, Craig had obviously changed his mind and didn't want to get him the car. Having a vehicle wasn't that big of a deal to Justin; it was the fact that his father had yet again went back on his word about something he had promised, that really pissed him off.

As Justin walked in the direction of Brian's parked car across the lot, he tensed up and felt his blood boil as he saw his boyfriend leaning up against his Honda, his arms folded across his chest, and talking to none other than Chris-the-fuckhead-Hobbs. He frowned as he saw Chris lean in close to Brian as he spoke to him. He watched as the two of them exchanged words and wondered what was being said between them, feeling a surge of jealousy run through his veins.

He wasn't sure what he should do. Should he go over there and interrupt them? Should he watch and wait for Chris to leave before going over there? Or maybe he should just pretend that he never saw Chris there in the first place? What if Brian didn't say anything about it; should he confront him?

While he was contemplating, he noticed that the conversation between Brian and Chris seemed to be getting a little heated, and he heard Chris shout something that sounded like "Fuck you!" and watched him storm off. He saw Brian light a cigarette and slightly shake his head, and without really thinking about it, he found himself walking over to his boyfriend.

Brian turned to see Justin walking towards him, and noticed that he had a strange look on his face. "Hey," he said, smiling at him.

"Hi. What was that all about?" Justin asked.

"What?" he asked, pretending not to know what Justin was talking about.

"I saw you talking to Chris Hobbs."

"Don't worry about it. It was nothing," Brian said dismissively, and unlocked his car. "You ready to go?" he asked.

Justin looked at Brian doubtfully. "Sure," he answered. He wanted to ask Brian what the fuck Chris wanted, but it was obvious that the other young man didn't want to discuss it. He made a mental note to try to get it out of him later.

Justin was quiet on the car ride home, his mind occupied with that fucking Chris Hobbs, and also with what Michael had said earlier.

"Are you okay?" Brian asked Justin.

Justin looked at Brian for a moment and sighed. No, he wasn't okay. Nothing was okay, right now. It seemed that everything was fucked up.

"Justin..."

"I don't know what I am, right now," Justin said quietly.

"Look, Mikey was a real asshole earlier. But I want you to know that I don't care about what he said, it was unfair and it's none of his fucking business," Brian told him, and reached out to rest his hand on Justin leg.

Justin rolled his eyes. "Brian -- please. You know it's true. He may have been an asshole, but he what he said was right," Justin said.

Brian frowned as he looked over at his boyfriend. "Damn it, Justin, cut this shit out. We're fine. Everything is fine," he assured him.

Justin shook his head. "No, it's not fine. How can you even think that?" he asked, feeling his guilt wash over him again.

They arrived at their house, and Brian parked his car in the driveway. He expected Justin to talk to him for a moment before they went inside, but as soon the car had come to a stop, Justin quickly unbuckled himself, grabbed his backpack, and hurried into the house, leaving Brian sitting by himself and wondering what the fuck was going on. Justin was queening out, and now he had to try to make him see that things were going to be okay.

He gathered his own backpack and went inside the house. He didn't really need to guess where Justin was, he knew he'd be in his room. Probably lying on his bed, on his stomach, and hugging his pillow. He knocked on the door, but Justin didn't answer, so he walked in anyway. Sure enough, Justin was on his bed, just as he'd pictured him.

"You know, if I wanted you to come in, I would have said so," Justin mumbled into his pillow.

"We need to talk about this," Brian told him.

Justin turned his head slightly to look up at Brian, tears in his eyes.

"Christ. Justin, stop crying," Brian sighed, and came over to sit on his boyfriend's bed. He put his hand on Justin's back and rubbed light circles.

Justin sighed. "Brian... I think maybe we should stop this," he said quietly.

Brian stopped rubbing Justin's back and looked at him seriously. "What the fuck are you talking about?" he asked.

Justin got up in the sitting position and looked back at Brian. "I don't think that this is working out," Justin said, looking down at his hands, not being able to look Brian in the eye.

Brian stared at Justin in disbelief.

"No-no-no, don't you fucking do this! Don't let what Michael said get to you. Listen to me. He doesn't fucking get it, and it's possible he never will. Michael's mother and uncle know that he's gay, and support him, and he doesn't seem to understand that it's not that easy for everyone else. Besides, he has no room to talk, since it's not like he's really out to anyone at school either. But you know I really don't give a fuck what he thinks. I told you that I'm okay with this," he assured him.

Justin shook his head, and felt his anger rise. He finally looked up at Brian. "You keep saying that, but you know, maybe I'm not! Michael is right. You shouldn't have to stay in the closet because of me. I'm holding you back from being who you are, and I'm making you lie to everyone, and it's not right! It's not fair that you should have to hide who you are because of me. I can't be selfish anymore," Justin told him.

Brian put his hands on Justin's shoulders. "Look, I told you before that I don't want to lie about us, but I will if that's what we have to do. We're in this together, and when you're ready, we'll both come out and tell everyone. Now stop being an idiot, because we're not breaking up over this," Brian told him.

"I don't want you to have to compromise your life for me. I want you to be happy, and I don't see how you can if you continue living your life as a lie," Justin whispered.

Brian reached out to caress Justin's cheek. "As long as we're together, I will be happy. Look, no one ever said that things were going to be easy. Sometimes we have to make sacrifices. And I know that this situation isn't going to last forever. It's just not the right time for you to come out, and as I said, when you are, let me know and we'll do it together," Brian said, looking into his boyfriend's eyes with such love and promise.

Justin stared back at Brian for what seemed like forever, before he finally nodded and then leaned in to hug him. He couldn't believe that Brian could be so patient and understanding. He felt incredibly lucky to have him, and silently vowed that he would somehow make this up to his lover some day.

"Love you," Brian whispered in Justin's ear. Justin smiled but didn't answer him. Instead, he moved in for a kiss that started out small, but quickly grew intense.

Their clothes quickly disappeared, and Brian was sheathed and entering Justin in record time. Their lovemaking was desperate, rough, and passionate, reflecting the emotional roller coaster they both had endured that day. It seemed with each thrust, their frustrations, worries and stress seemed to be less and less, as they released their pent up emotions.

When Brian thrust deeply into Justin one last time and came, his whole body seemed to vibrate. He felt Justin's hole spasming around him as his own orgasm followed, and they clung to each other, feeling the aftershocks from their blissful act.

Brian kissed Justin's neck and face, while his boyfriend ran his hands up and down his sweaty back. They were both pretty sure they'd never felt more exhausted in their life.

"Now, after sharing something as great as that, could you ever imagine not having it again?" Brian whispered.

Justin gave Brian a small smile and shook his head. "No," he answered.

"I'm willing to make the sacrifices for this, Justin. For us. You're worth it," Brian said sincerely, and Justin kissed him passionately, touched by his words.

They lay in each other's arms for a while in comfortable silence, listening to one another's breathing. They wanted to go to sleep, but knew that Jennifer would be coming home with Molly soon. They reluctantly got up and showered separately.

**********************************************************

The next morning Brian and Justin stopped at Starbucks on the way to school, both really needing the caffeine. After their intense fucking from the day before, and another fuck after their parents and Molly had fallen asleep, that had them up (in more ways than one) until the early morning hours, they were both in need of a little pick-me-up.

After getting their coffee, they got into Brian's car, and as they pulled out of the parking lot, Justin turned the music down on the radio. Brian looked over at his boyfriend curiously. Their daily morning drive to school was usually quiet, mostly because Justin wasn't a morning person and was half asleep in the car. He was not one for conversation that early in the day. Mostly, they just drove in silence with the radio playing, and it was just as well, since Brian had learned early on that his boyfriend could be quite the grump before 8:00a.m.

Now he was staring at Justin, waiting for something... what, he didn't know. All he knew was that if Justin turned down the radio, that meant he wanted to talk, which was unusual in itself at that moment.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Justin asked innocently.

"You want to talk?" Brian asked suspiciously.

"Is it really that shocking?" Justin said defensively.

"Uh, yeah, actually it is, since usually you just sit in that seat like a zombie every morning. You and I both know that you're not much of a talker this early. What's going on?" he asked.

Justin silently cursed himself. Brian knew him too well. "Well..." he paused, unsure now whether he should go ahead with this or let it go.

"...Yes?" Brian urged.

"I just, um, wanted to ask you something," he said, looking out the window and trying to sound casual.

"Uh-oh," Brian sighed.

"Shut up," Justin half heartedly smiled.

Brian looked at him expectantly. "Well?"

Justin licked his lips. "It has to do with Chris Hobbs talking to you in the parking lot yesterday --"

Brian let out a annoyed sigh. "Justin..."

"Things looked a little intense... I just want to know what happened. Why was Chris there?" There. He asked him.

"It doesn't matter," Brian said sternly, keeping his eyes on the road.

Justin felt his frustration grow. "I don't see what the big fucking deal is. What are you hiding?" he asked.

Brian looked at his boyfriend and frowned. "Justin, you know that I wouldn't let anything happen with Chris again, right?" he asked.

"Of course. I trust you," Justin said.

"Then what's this all about?"

"There was just something about his demeanor. He looked really pissed off. Can you really blame me for wanting to know what happened between you two?" he asked.

Brian sighed. "Fine. Let's just say, he didn't appreciate being told to fuck himself after I turned him down to have another 'study session'," Brian finally answered.

Justin frowned. "You mean he wanted to hook up again?"

"Yep."

"How many times has this happened?"

Brian sighed before he answered, knowing that Justin wouldn't be happy with his answer. "Only a couple."

"Only?" Justin replied and laughed acidly. "And you thought that I shouldn't know this because...?" he asked angrily.

"Because I knew you'd be reacting the way you are right now," Brian said defensively, feeling his own anger rising. This was exactly why he didn't say anything to Justin about this in the first place. He knew that he would be a drama princess about it and make a big deal out of nothing.

"Please. It's not even that big of a deal to me that Chris tried to make a fuck date with you," Justin lied.

Brian raised a brow at his boyfriend, whose face was now flushed pink.

"Okay, fine, it is, but I'm more pissed that you didn't want to tell me about it. I don't like us to keep secrets from each other," he told him.

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I really didn't see the point. I have no interest whatsoever in seeing Chris Hobbs, studying with him, fucking him, or having anything to do with him at all, and I told him that yesterday, since he didn't seem to be getting it. You know how jocks are; you have to spell everything out for them," Brian smiled, trying to lighten things up.

Justin wasn't amused though. "You still should have told me about it," he huffed, stubbornly.

They arrived at St. James Academy, and Brian pulled into the parking lot and into a free space. He unbuckled his belt and turned to face the blond.

"Justin, I don't give a fuck about him. That is why I didn't waste my time bringing it up, because you have nothing to worry about. What happened with him before was a mistake, and to be honest, it wasn't even that good," Brian admitted, which Justin couldn't help but smirk at.

Brian briefly looked around to see if there were any students around, and when he saw there wasn't, he leaned in close to Justin's ear and whispered, "I only have eyes for you," and then gave him a kiss that proved his point, leaving Justin breathless.

Satisfied, Justin beamed back at him. He could never stay mad at Brian for too long. His lover's loving, sexy eyes and charming smile, not to mention his breathtaking kisses, were irresistible.

"Okay?" Brian asked, lifting Justin's chin.

Justin nodded. "Okay," he said, giving in.

"Good." He gave Justin one last peck on the lips, and then they exited the car and walked towards the campus.

**********************************************************

"That interfering little drip!" Daphne exclaimed after Justin had vented to her about Michael. They were soaking in Daphne's jacuzzi and smoking cigarettes.

"I know. In all honesty though, he wasn't really that far off the mark. And he was just trying to protect Brian. You know how he's always felt about him," Justin pointed out.

"Are you making excuses for him?" Daphne asked incredulously, making a face.

"No, of course not. It's just that after thinking about it, I can understand where he's coming from," Justin told her.

Daphne shook her head. "I can't believe you can be so understanding about this. If he stuck his nose in my business like that, you better bet your ass that I would have had him praying for Captain Astro to come and save his pathetic ass before I was through with him!"

Justin laughed, almost choking on the cigarette smoke he had just inhaled, at the mental image of his best friend kicking Michael's ass, and her victim desperately calling upon the help of his favorite gay superhero. "God, I love you, Daph," he grinned.

"That's because I'm the greatest, loyalest, funniest, smartest, not to mention, the most hottest person you know!" she giggled.

"You're also the vainest," Justin laughed. "And most annoying-ist," he added.

Daphne started laughing harder. "Annoying-ist? That's not even a word, retard," she pointed out.

"Well, I had to keep the 'ists' going, and 'annoying' was the first word that came to mind," he said, still laughing with his friend.

Their laughter was interrupted by Daphne's cell phone. Justin knew that Daphne had different ring tones for all her friends, but this ring tone was unfamiliar to him. "Who is that?" he asked curiously.

"Oh, it's Lindsay," she answered happily, as she threw out her cigarette and reached for her phone before it went to voicemail. "Hey, Linds," she said, smiling into the receiver. Justin watched her carefully.

"...oh, Justin and I were just sitting in the jacuzzi talking about what an asshole Michael is," she smirked. "...Uh, yeah, sure... Okay... Around 6:00?... See you then." Daphne closed her phone, and when she looked back at Justin she noticed he was giving her an odd look.

"What?" she asked.

"You and Lindsay seem like you've gotten to be pretty good friends," Justin observed. He and Brian had introduced Lindsay and Daphne just a few weeks prior, and the two girls seemed to hit it off right away.

Daphne smiled. "Yeah, she's great." She looked at Justin who was still giving her a curious look. "Why the fuck are you looking at me like that?" she asked.

"Nothing... I've just noticed that you and Lindsay seem to be spending a lot of time together these days," Justin said, watching for a reaction.

"Yeah... so?" Daphne said, feeling herself slightly blush.

"Daph, you do know that Lindsay is a lesbian, right?" he asked.

"What are you saying? You think a straight girl and a lesbian aren't capable of having a friendship just because they have different sexual orientations?" Daphne asked with a frown.

"I didn't say that..."

"Well, then what's your point?" Daphne asked.

"Come on, Daph, I saw the expression on your face when you answered your phone."

Daphne blushed a darker shade of pink.

"Oh my God... has she hit on you?" Justin asked in amusement.

"No!" Daphne answered quickly. "And for your information, Lindsay has had a boyfriend before. She's bisexual," Daphne informed him.

"Really? Because whenever I'm around her, I get this strong lesbian vibe," Justin told her.

"Does it even matter? She is what she is. Who cares if she's straight, bi, gay, whatever? She's still a great person, and I like hanging out with her," Daphne said.

Justin put his hand up in surrender. "Hey, Lindsay is my friend too. All I'm saying is be cautious. It wasn't that long ago that she broke up with Melanie, and you know how that is. You don't want your wires to get crossed - someone might get hurt, and it could ruin your friendship," Justin told her.

"God, you are such a worrier. Relax," Daphne said, rolling her eyes. She reached for her pack of cigarettes and offered one to Justin, who accepted it. She then got one out for herself.

"By the way, Jus... I know it's a couple of months away, but have you given any thought to going to prom?" Daphne asked casually.

Justin smirked at his friend. "Are you kidding?" he asked.

Daphne shook her head. "Lindsay and I were talking about how it might be fun if we got the whole gang to go together," she told him, exhaling smoke.

"I don't know," Justin said, doubtfully.

"We were actually thinking that you could be my date, and Lindsay could be Brian's date," Daphne said.

Justin raised a brow at his friend. "Huh?" he asked.

Daphne gave her friend a sheepish smile. "You see, Lindsay's parents are expecting her to have a date to her prom - it's some weird obsession her mom has since she was her own school's prom queen. She's even already gone through catalogs with Lindsay to find the perfect dress... and well, Brian would be the perfect person for her to go with," Daphne explained.

"Great," Justin huffed.

"Oh, come on. I don't see how that's so different about your situation, Justin. You don't want your parents to know that you're gay either. If you go to the prom with me it will look better for you," Daphne reasoned.

"Daphne..."

"Even Ted is taking a date. He's going with Cynthia," Daphne pointed out. Justin gave her a surprised look. "Come on, Justin. It will be fun," Daphne said with an encouraging smile.

"Fine, I'll talk to Brian about it," Justin sighed.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Daphne beamed, and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Why do I have a feeling that this is a bad idea?" Justin asked.

"Because, you're paranoid, as always."

Justin was quiet for a moment, seemingly deep in thought. "So what do you think I should go with... spaghetti straps or sleeveless?" he asked, with a serious face.

Daphne laughed. "Oh, I definitely think you would look absolutely fabulous in a satin, powder blue, spaghetti strap gown."

The two of them continued to laugh and joke until Justin got a call from Brian saying that he was on his way to pick him up. Justin realized that after all that prom talk with Daphne, he was actually getting excited about it. The more they talked about it, the more it made him think that it might be fun. He'd like for all of their friends to go together to share one last party night as high school students. After the year was over, he knew that they all probably wouldn't get to see each other as much because that's usually what happened when you got to college, and some of his friends were going to school out of state.

When Brian pulled up, Justin got into the passenger seat, and leaned in to kiss his boyfriend.

"Did you have fun with Miss Daphne?" Brian teased.

"As a matter of fact, I did. The conversation was quite interesting, and speaking of which, there is something that I wanted to run by you," Justin said.

"Why do I get scared every time you say that?"

Justin laughed. "Don't worry, it's not that bad," he assured him.

Brian smirked. "Yeah, where have I heard that before?"