Breaking The Rules

Decisions

Justin's POV

Molly and I are sitting in the kitchen eating some sandwiches that I've made for us as we wait for Mom to get home from work. Molly gives me a look of dread when we hear the front door open and close. I give her a reassuring smile, but it doesn't seem to help.

"Molly?" Mom calls out from the other room.

"We're in the kitchen, Mom!" I call out.

Mom walks into the kitchen and smiles at us, giving us each a kiss on the cheek. "Hi honey, how are you feeling?" she asks Molly, feeling her forehead for a fever. Molly looks over at me nervously.

"Mom, sit down. We need to discuss some things with you," I tell her.

Mom gets a worried look on her face, and tentatively sits in the empty chair next to me. "What is it?" she asks.

"Dr. Norris called me in to speak with her after the exam, and she said that Molly doesn't have the flu," I start out.

"What?" Mom asks with a confused look. "Well, what on earth is wrong with her then? She's been sick all week," she points out.

"Mom, I'm pregnant," Molly blurts out.

Mom looks over at her in shock. "What?" she asks is disbelief.

"Don't make me say it again," she whispers, refusing to make eye contact with our mother.

"How could this have happened?" she asks.

"Easy, Mom. He had sex with me against my will and didn't bother using a condom," Molly said, choking on her words, as tears came to her eyes. I can't believe she can cry anymore after all tears she's already shed today.

Mom then gets tears in her eyes as well, and gets up to hug Molly. "Oh, Molly," is all she says, and they just cry. After a few minutes, they finally put away from each other.

"I don't know what to do," Molly sobs. "I don't know if I can handle any of this," she says.

"It'll be okay, sweetheart. Your brother and I are both here for you, you know that, right?"

"Yeah, I do," Molly nods and gives a weak smile.

"It will all be okay, Moll. If you want, I'll go with you when you if and when you have the procedure done," I offer.

Molly looks over at me and frowns. "I never said I wanted an abortion," she says.

Mom and I both stare back at her incredulously. "Honey, surely you don't want to have this baby... you're only 16!" Mom says. "You're practically still a baby yourself."

"I'm not a baby, Mother," Molly protests. "And I'm not saying that I'm completely opposed to having an abortion; I just haven't had a chance to think it over. I want to be sure," she says.

"Molly, you need to think long and hard about this. It isn't easy being a parent - and it certainly wouldn't be easy being a teenage parent; not to mention you'd have no support coming in from... that monster who did this to you," Mom says.

"I know, Mom. But I'm not making any decisions until I've thought all of this through," Molly tells her sternly.

Mom nods in response, but still looks upset. I can see she wants to talk about this more; convince Molly that being a parent at 16 is going to ruin her life, but she's keeping quiet for now.

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I slide back the loft door and walk into the home that I share with my lover. I see Brian sitting over at his desk, engrossed in his computer screen, but he looks up at me when he sees me walking toward him. When I reach him, I lean down and kiss him lightly on the lips.

"Hey, how's Molly?" he asks.

I look at him a bit hesitantly.

"What's wrong?" he asks, concerned.

"She's pregnant," I sigh.

Brian's eyes go wide with surprise. "What? Are they sure?" he asks.

I nod back at him. "The guy that attacked Molly didn't use a condom. When we took her to the hospital the night of the attack, they ran some STD tests, but obviously a pregnancy test would have been pointless since it was too soon. I guess when all the tests came back negative we were so relieved that it didn't occur to us that she could be pregnant," I tell him, shaking my head, sadly.

"Wow. I can't imagine what she's going through," Brian said. "I'm so sorry," he whispers, and stands up to give me a hug. It feels so good to have his arms around me. For a while now I've been doing my best to be a good son and brother, and keep things together and support my family. At the end of the day though, the stress of it all settles on me, and I find that I need someone to tell me that things are going to be okay. That is why I am so glad that I have Brian, now. He's my strongest supporter.

"How's Molly holding up?"

"She's upset, scared, confused..." I pause.

"Confused?" Brian asks.

"She told us that she doesn't know whether or not she wants an abortion," I tell him.

Brian nods slowly. "Well, that's a difficult decision, but it's her decision, and I hope that she realizes how big of a responsibility it is to be a parent," Brian says.

"You should have seen my mother's face. She does not want Molly having this baby," I tell him, shaking my head.

"Well, there's always the possibility of adoption."

"Yeah. She's got a lot to think about."

I feel Brian's hands resting on my shoulders, and sigh contentedly as he lightly starts to massage them.

"You hungry?" he asks.

"A little," I admit.

"I could heat us up some of Deb's left over lasagna that she forced us to take home after Sunday dinner," he suggests.

I smile at that, thinking about how good Deb's cooking is and feel my hunger grow. "That sounds perfect," I tell him. He kisses my cheek and then heads for the kitchen to stick our dinner in the oven.

We eat dinner in comfortable silence. I can't stop worrying about Molly and what this is all doing to her. She's just a kid, and she deserves to be a happy, and enjoy her youth instead of having to endure all of this stress and drama bullshit.

"Hey," Brian says softly as we lay together in bed after making love.

"Hmm?"

"It will be okay, you know. We can't turn back the clock. The only thing we can do is accept this situation and deal with it the best we can, and be there for Molly," he says.

"It's just all so fucked up," I sigh.

"I know this might sound cliché, but I do believe that everything happens for a reason," he whispers, kissing my temple.

"Even so, I can't see how that reason could be justified," I huff.

"It might, you never know," Brian says, and then hugs me closer to him. "I love you," he whispers sleepily.

"You too," I answer, and try to force my mind to stop its overload so I can get a decent night's sleep.

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Molly's POV

Class has just ended and I'm gathering up my backpack, when Jenna comes over to me, all smiles. Sometimes I feel like smacking her annoying giddy smile off her face. Nobody is really that happy all the time. I hate how fucking fake she is sometimes. We've never really been close, but she's been my friend since, like the 5th grade, and well, staying in her circle of friends never hurt since she's always been popular. If you're friends with her, pretty much everyone likes you. And why wouldn't they? She's what all the other girls envy - she's practically perfect. Perfect hair, perfect body, perfect life, perfect... relationship -- or so she thinks.

"Hi, Molly. You haven't been at school, have you been sick or something?" Jenna asks, like she really cares.

"Uh, yeah. I had the flu," I lie.

She gets a look of disgust on her face. "Eww, gross. I'm glad it wasn't me," she says, and tosses her long curly hair over her shoulder.

I look away and roll my eyes as I stand up to leave, when she keep talking. "So, anyway, since you haven't been here, you missed all the excitement," she tells me.

I start walking out the door and she follows me. "Excitement about what?" I ask her, not really interested.

"Grant bought me this," she says, and holds out her hand, wiggling her fingers in my direction. I immediately notice a ring on her forefinger. "Isn't it beautiful?" she giggles.

I stare at the ring. It's a sterling silver band with what I'm pretty sure is a Cubic Zircornia stone in the center. "It's... nice," I tell her, trying to sound like I actually mean it, and keep walking.

"It's a promise ring. Isn't he sweet? I know there's been a few rumors that he's cheated on me, but all those girls are just jealous liars. He bought me this ring to show them all that I'm his girl," Jenna says proudly.

I feel like puking, and for the first time lately, it's not because of morning sickness.

Then, to my horror, the sweet boyfriend in question walks right up to us. He gathers Jenna in his arms and kisses her soundly on the lips. He then hugs her, and then his eyes meet mine.

Those eyes. Those icy, laughing eyes.

My whole body stiffens, like it always does whenever I see him, or think of him, or when I'm forced to be near him, like now. I can feel the bile rising in my throat.

They pull away from their hug, and Jenna is looking back at Grant like he's God or something. "I was just showing Molly the ring you gave to me, baby," she gushes, and then adoringly looks down at her ring finger again.

He nods dismissively, and wraps his arm around her shoulder. "Come on, I'll walk you to your next class," he tells her. She smiles at him and giggles again. My Geometry class is next door to Jenna's, and I absolutely can't stand the thought of walking with the happy couple, so I quickly think of an excuse to get out of it.

"Well, I'll see you later, Jenna, I told Tracy I'd meet her in the library before class to get the History notes I missed from being out of school," I lie. She doesn't need to know that I already did that just before last period.

"Oh, okay. See you later," she says, seemingly not caring whether I'm with them or not, and they start walking away. But as they walk in the direction of Jenna's next class, Grant turns his head back to me, and looks at me strangely. I can't read his expression, and at this point I really don't care to know what it means. I just want to get the fuck away from him.

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I'm alone in the Art room, lost in my painting, as I listen to Incubus on my headphones. I love being here after school when no one else is around. After the run-in earlier with Grant, I felt the need to let some stress out, and art is the best way I know how to do it. It's a lot better than becoming a druggie or alcoholic, though I might have gone in that direction if I didn't have a living being growing inside of me.

I still haven't decided yet what I'm going to do, and I know that my time is running out, but seriously, the more time that goes by, the harder it is to consider an abortion. Even if I decided that I can't handle being a parent, it's not this unborn baby's fault. I've thought about giving he or she up for adoption. I think that would be better than going through with an abortion. But what if when the time comes to give the baby up I'm so attached and don't want to let go? What if I can't ever get over the guilt of giving my baby away? I know I have to think about it some more. I just hope that when I finally make my decision that it's the right one.

I continue to create my art, my hand leading the brush in long strokes. I have no idea what it is that I'm creating. I just let my hand work the brush with no specific direction or plan, as I hear the words on one of my favorite Incubus songs.

I'd like to close my eyes and go numb but there's a cold wind coming from the top of the highest high-rise today.

It's not a breeze 'cause it blows hard. Yes and it wants me to discard the humanity I know, watch the warmth blow away.

I add a mixture of darker colors to my art, swirling them around on the canvas.

Don't let the world bring you down. Not everyone here is that fucked up and cold.

Remember why you came and while you're alive, experience the warmth before you grow old.

I am startled when I feel someone tap me on my shoulder. I immediately turn around and I freeze with fright as I see Grant standing there smiling at me. I take off my headphones and though I'm scared to death, I glare at him, trying show him that I'm not intimidated by his presence.

"What are you doing here?" I ask with a frown.

He looks over at my painting. "Wow, that's really fucking dark. Are you on the rag or something?" he smirks, ignoring my initial question.

"What do you want, Grant?" I ask again.

"Do I need a reason to stop by the Art room?" he asks innocently.

I stare at him knowingly, my dissatisfied look still firmly in place.

"Okay, I came to see you," he admits.

"Why?" I almost whisper, afraid of what he wants from me.

"Well, the truth is, I can't get you off my mind, sweet thing," he says, his eyes reflecting that familiar look of lust that I'll never forget. He rests his hand on my shoulder, and I jump and move away.

"T-that was a one time thing, Grant," I stutter, and realize that I just made the rape sound like a one night stand.

"Yeah, I thought so too, but... I can't forget how fucking unbelievable you felt," he says in a cold shivering whisper as he leans into my ear. "I just want one more taste," he says, his breathing getting heavier, and then pulls me closer to him, allowing me to feel his erection against my body.

I start to panic, as I scan the room and see there are no students or teachers in sight. He could lock the door right now and rape me again right in this Art room and no one would even know.

"No," I tell him, trying to sound strong, but knowing that it instead sounded desperate.

"Shhh, Molly. It's much better the second time. And you won't have to worry about the blood this time, either," he says.

I briefly flash back to seeing the blood that was the result of his forced entry and remember being hit with the realization that my innocence was taken away from me and now soaking my brother's white sheets.

He places his hand on my butt, and starts rubbing it.

"Stop! W-what about Jenna! You love her... you gave her a ring," I say, desperately grasping at anything that might make him stop.

Grant only laughs. "I just gave her that fucking ring to shut her up and stop accusing me of fucking other girls. And it worked. She's been off my back ever since," he tells me.

"Don't you love her?" I ask him.

Grant shrugs. "Sure. But she doesn't hold a candle to you in bed," he says. "You're the best I've ever had," he says, and leans in to try to kiss me. I pull away from him, and shove him as hard as I can, which doesn't really do much.

"Ohh, someone wants to fight," he says with an unnerving smile. "I'd think twice if I were you, though. You know what happened last time."

"Get out of here and leave me alone!" I yell.

"I don't think so, sweet thing," he says, and grabs a hold of my wrist roughly.

"What's going on here?" a voice says, surprising us both. We turn to see Mrs. Witkins, the art teacher standing in the doorway of the classroom frowning at us. Grant immediately lets go of my wrist and gives our teacher a charming smile. The one that allows him to get away with everything.

"Hello, Mrs. Witkins. Molly and I were just having a small disagreement. Nothing for you to worry about," he says calmly.

"Molly? Is this true?" she asks.

I'm staring at her, unsure how to answer, when I'm saved by my cell phone ringing. I look at the Caller ID and see it's Justin, and sigh in relief.

"Um, it's my brother," I tell them before answering my phone. "Hey, Justin," I say, trying to sound casual, but my voice still a little shaky.

"Molly, what's wrong?" he asks, knowing right away from the sound of my voice that something is going on.

"Um, yeah, if you could come get me right now, I'm ready," I tell him, looking back and forth between my teacher and Grant.

"I'll be right out front as soon as I can," he tells me, and hangs up.

"I've got to go," I tell them, and start gathering up my things.

"Molly, is everything all right?" Mrs. Witkins asks.

"Yeah, fine. I'll see you tomorrow," I tell her, and even throw in a reassuring smile.

"Okay," she says, looking as if she may be a little doubtful. I don't care what she thinks though, I just want to get the Hell out of here!

"See you around, Molly," Grant says as I'm about to head out the door. I don't bother answering him as I walk out the door.

I'm a jittery mess as I wait for Justin out in front of the school, constantly looking over my shoulder to see if Grant is watching me or following me. When I finally see Justin pulling up I sigh with relief, and quickly get into the car.

"What happened?" Justin asks with concern.

"Just drive... please. Get me away from here," I tell him. He nods and quickly drives us away from St. James.

I'm surprised when he drives us to the loft, but I'm a little glad because I don't really want to face Mom if she's home right now. She's going to freak when she finds out and I just can't deal with that right now. When we're finally in the loft, I take a seat on the sofa, and Justin goes to the fridge to get us a couple of sodas. We sit there in silence for a couple of minutes. I guess he's giving me time to regroup or something.

"Are you okay?" he finally asks.

I look over at him and shook my head. "He -- I was in the art room... and well there wasn't anyone around... and he wouldn't leave me alone," I said, and soon found myself feeling sick to my stomach, and my breathing grow rapid.

"Whoa, Molly," Justin says, recognizing right away what is happening. He quickly takes my soda from me and instructs me to lay down on the sofa. I'm gasping for air now, and in full panic mode.

"Okay, you need to try to calm down, and breath slowly in and out. That's it," he tells me, as I try to follow his instructions during my anxiety attack. My lungs feel like they are caving in, and I panic even more, worrying about the baby and wondering if this is causing harm to he or she.

After several minutes, my breathing becomes more even. Justin is patiently sitting with me, waiting for me to tell him what's going on.

"Molly, is Grant harassing you?" Justin asks.

"He... tried to do it again," I whisper, and see a look of rage in Justin's eyes.

"Molly, you need to report him to the police! This can't keep going on. He's going to continue with this shit and get away with it if you don't say anything," Justin says.

"I'm scared, Justin. He said that no one would believe me... that they would all call me a lying slut," I tell him, not being able to stop the tears from flowing.

Justin shakes his head at me and takes my hand in his. "No, Molly. He told you that so that you wouldn't tell the cops. Rape is very serious, and the chances of them believing him over you is slim to none," Justin tells me.

"But if we go to Court he'll find out about the baby," I cry.

"Honey, regardless, this has to be done," he tells me.

I nod at him, as I wipe away my tears. "I know."

"God, what if I see him again tomorrow? What do I do?" I ask.

"For now, make sure you're never anywhere by yourself, okay? No staying after school in the art room. No walking anywhere alone, including the bus stop," he says.

"But how will..."

"I'll pick you up every day from school," he answers.

"Okay," I say, finally giving in.

"All right, so are you agreeing to press charges on Grant for rape?" he asks me.

I sigh, as I think it all through. I don't want this to go on anymore. I don't want to live in fear. I don't want him to do this to another girl. "Yes," I say softly.

Justin smiles at me and then gives me a big hug. "I'm so proud of you Moll. You're doing the right thing," he assures me. "Okay, first I need to make a phone call to Melanie and get some legal advice. She'll tell us what we need to do," he says, picking up his cordless phone and dialing a number.

I can only hope that this doesn't all backfire on me. I mean, what if Grant is right? What if nobody believes me? I'll lose my friends, my reputation will be ruined... Everyone will say that I'm a slut who tried to steal my friend's boyfriend. And what if people find out that I'm pregnant?

On the other hand, if I don't do this, he could keep harassing me, other people may get hurt too, and I'll be terrified all the time. I don't want that. This situation sucks, but I think I'm making the right decision by reporting Grant.

I hope.