A Work in Progress

**************************************    

 

Brian paced the loft.  He had waited for almost three hours to hear from Justin, but not a word.  He had dropped Justin off in front of Ethan’s building around 10 pm.  It was now almost 1 am.  He should have heard from Justin by now.

 

He had wanted to stay, to wait while Justin told Ethan that it was over.  Justin had sent him away, saying he didn’t know how long it would take, and he didn’t want Brian to have to wait in the Jeep.  'Probably thought that I would burst in on them, and I would have long before now,' Brian thought.  Justin had promised to call when it was done, but he hadn’t so far.  'Could they still be talking?  Had Justin changed his mind?  Had Ethan done something to him?  Surely not, but why hasn’t he called?' Brian wondered.

 

Brian had downed half a bottle of Beam while he waited, but it hadn’t helped much.  He didn’t want to get too drunk in case Justin needed him, but he had to take the edge off or he was going to go crazy.

 

Finally the phone rang.  Brian grabbed it and said, “Justin?”

 

“Yeah.  It’s me,” was the reply.

 

“Thank God.  I’ve been going crazy.  Where are you?  Are you all right?”

 

“I’m at Deb’s, in my old room.  I got here a little while ago.  Of course, she made me eat something and tell her what’s going on.  I kept it to a minimum.  Nothing about you and me, just that Ethan and I are through.  Finally she let me go to bed, so I could call you.”

 

“Do you want me to come and get you?”

 

“I want that so bad, but not yet.  We still haven’t sorted everything out.”

 

“But you’re done with Ethan?”

 

“Yeah.  It’s finished.”

 

“How did it go?  Are you all right?”

 

”It was pretty awful.  I think he knew it was coming, but that didn’t make it any easier.  He said some awful things.”

 

"Like what?”

 

“That I used him.  That I never cared for him.  That I was a selfish prick.”

 

“That one’s usually reserved for me.”

 

“I know.”  Justin had to chuckle, even though he felt miserable about what had happened with Ethan.  “I guess I deserved it, but it hurt to hear him say those things.  I never set out to hurt him, and I do care about him.  I just never loved him the way I love you.”

 

Brian sighed.  He knew that Justin wanted him to say that he loved him back, but he couldn’t.  It would make Justin feel better, but he couldn’t.  He wasn’t ready, but he remembered Lindsay’s words about telling Justin what he was thinking and feeling.  He had to try.

 

“Justin, I can’t say those words yet, but I’m glad you’re okay and back in my life.”

 

“Me too,” said Justin.  “Will you meet me after work?  We still have a lot to talk about.”

 

“Want to go to dinner at the Thai restaurant?”

 

“Like a date?”

 

Brian rolled his eyes.

 

“I know you’re rolling your eyes,” Justin said.

 

Brian laughed.  “You’re right.  Do you think we’re back in sync?”

 

“Getting there.”  Justin smiled.

 

“I’ll pick you up in front of your studio building at six.”

 

“It’s a date,” Justin insisted.

 

“It’s a date,” said Brian, giving in.  “God, I’m horny.  I don’t know how I’ll ever get any sleep tonight.”

 

“Maybe I can help you with that, and you could help me in return.”

 

“It would be much simpler if I just came and got you.”

 

“Briiaann,” Justin whined.

 

“Oh, all right.  Are you in bed?”

 

“Give me a minute.  You get naked too.”

 

“I am.”

 

“Saucy bastard.  What were you planning to do?” Justin wanted to know.

 

“I have some secrets even you don’t know about.”

 

“You’ll have to show me some day.”

 

“Only if you’re a really, really bad boy.”

 

“I can do that.”

 

“I know you can.”

 

“What are you doing right now?” Justin asked.

 

“Lying on the bed, playing with my dick, and wanting you to suck it like only you can.”

 

“You have such a way with words, Mr. Kinney.  Flattery will get you, and me, a hard on.”

 

“I’ve already got one.”

 

“Me too.”

 

“What are you going to do with it?”

 

“Right now I’m picturing it in your mouth.  Aah, Brian, you give such great blowjobs.  You’re licking the slit and running your tongue up and down the sides.”

 

“Uhhnn,” Brian groaned.  “I’m sucking your balls, rolling them around with my tongue.  You taste so good.  I’m so hard, thinking about it.”

 

“Take me into your mouth, all the way.”

 

“You got it.  All the way down my throat.  Oh fuck.  I’m almost ready.  Are you?  I want us to come at the same time.”

 

“Almost.  You’re sucking me off faster and faster.  Faster, Brian!  Don’t stop!  Feels so good.”

 

Brian worked his hand up and down his shaft, increasingly frantic, as Justin begged him to go faster and faster.

 

“Oh God, I’m coming,” Brian yelled.

 

“Me too.  Oh, oh, oh, Brian!  Now!!” Justin moaned, trying not to wake Deb and Vic.

 

“Fuck.  That was great!  How was it for you, Justin?”

 

“Peachy,” Justin replied, using one of Brian’s patented answers. 

 

“You little shit,” Brian grinned.

 

“It was fabulous.” Justin laughed.  “I think maybe I can get some sleep now.”

 

“Me too.  See you for dinner, if I can wait that long.”

 

“Night, Brian.  I love you.”

 

“Night,” Brian said, and shut the phone off.  For the first time he wanted to say ‘I love you’ back.  'Maybe next time,' he thought, and rolled over to get one of the best sleeps he had had in a long time.

 

**************************************

 

At 6 pm Brian pulled up in front of the studio building.  Justin was standing on the steps, and he ran down when he saw the Jeep.

 

'A little different from the last time I picked him up here,' Brian thought, smiling to himself.

 

Justin pulled open the door and flung himself at Brian.  They kissed passionately for several minutes, sucking and groping, not able to get enough of each other.

 

Finally Justin pulled back, and said breathlessly, “I’m hungry.”

 

“So am I.  For you.”  Brian continued to kiss him and lick his chin, his neck, his ear.

 

“Stop, Brian.  We need to eat, and talk.”

 

Brian groaned.  “My cock is going to explode into a million pieces if we keep doing this.”

 

“Always bragging about how big it is.”  Justin clucked his teeth in mock disapproval.

 

Brian laughed.  “I think I’ve missed laughing with you more than almost anything else.”

 

“I know.  I missed it too.  Ethan was always so serious.  Oh shit!  I’m sorry.  I won’t bring him up again.”  Justin looked scared.

 

“Don’t worry.  He’s a fact of our lives.  He’s one of the things we’ll have to talk about.”

 

“I don’t want to ruin everything by bringing him up.  We were having fun.”

 

“We still can.  Let’s go to dinner.”

 

**************************************

 

They ate and made small talk for a while, just enjoying being together.  Finally Brian thought they better settle some things.

 

“I want you to move back into the loft,” he said.

 

“You know we have to make some decisions first.  I don’t want things to end up the way they did before.”

 

“Neither do I, but as I was trying to tell you the night of the infamous Jeep incident, I am trying to change.”

 

“What brought this on, Brian?  I’m the one who cheated,” Justin said.  “I have to change.”

 

“We both do.  That’s what Lindsay showed me.  I barely listened to you and rarely talked.  You talked, but without making me listen.  We kind of brushed past each other without really hearing or connecting.  Those last few weeks were Hell.  I don’t want to do that again.”

 

“That makes two of us.  It sounds like you have been doing a lot of thinking.”

 

“I have.  I tried to imagine my life without you.  I even tried to go back to my old life - the ‘fuck ‘em all, don’t give a shit, heartless bastard’ that I used to be.  Somewhere in trying to recapture that ‘I don’t give a damn’ philosophy, I realized I do give a damn.  About you.  You say I ruined you for anybody else; well you ruined me for my old life.  Lindsay said I couldn’t go back, I had to go forward.”

 

“Wow!”

 

“Wow, what?” Brian asked.

 

“You just blew me away.  I’ve never heard you analyze things like that before.”

 

“That doesn’t mean I don’t think about things.  I just never express them out loud.”

 

“But now you are.  Saying them out loud, I mean.  That’s great, Brian.”

 

“Well, don’t get too used to it.  I’ve never found it easy to talk about this stuff.”

 

“You’re always easy.”

 

“Lucky for you.”  Brian grinned at the sexy innuendo.

 

“Seriously though, I like this new and improved Brian Kinney.”

 

“I think I do too.  But I also realize that I’m not easy to live with.  I told you that these changes were ‘a work in progress’, and they are.  I’m not finished with them yet, and I’m sure there will be times when I revert to my old habits.  I’ve had 30 years to polish my defenses, and they’re not going to disappear overnight, or completely.”

 

“That’s very realistic,” Justin said seriously.  “I wouldn’t want you to change everything.  I fell in love with the old Brian Kinney, and I don’t want him to disappear.  Maybe we can just smooth off some of the edges.  I’ll try not to expect too much too fast.  We’ll take it slow.”

 

“And if I can’t handle something, I’ll tell you that it’s ‘a work in progress’, which means I’m trying, but I’m not there yet.”

 

“And I’ll try to back off.  Not push you.”

 

“Agreed.”  Brian stuck out his hand to shake.  Justin took it, and was pulled across the table into a kiss.  When Brian let him go, Justin looked around, embarrassed.

 

“Still into public displays, I see,” Justin kidded.  “Let’s get out of here.”

 

“Right.”  Brian threw down a generous amount of money and they hurriedly made their way to the Jeep.

 

As soon as they were in the car, Brian pounced on Justin again.  He kissed him and kissed him and kissed him.  Justin tried to speak, but Brian would smother his mouth with more kisses.

 

Finally Justin was able to push him away.

 

“Don’t make me stop,” Brian begged.  “I need you,” and he started kissing again.

 

“Brian...”  A kiss smothered his words.  “Brian.”

 

“What?”  Brian moaned, finally letting up.

 

“Let’s go to the loft.”

 

“Do you mean it?” Brian asked, eyes wide.

 

“Yes.  Hurry!”

 

Brian slammed the car in gear and peeled away.  They raced through the streets at breakneck speeds.

 

“Don’t kill us before we get there.  I want to fuck you at least once more before I die,” Justin said, only partially joking.

 

“I’m going to fuck you a million times before either of us dies.”

 

“Is that all?  Only a million?”

 

“Greedy pig!  Okay, a billion.”

 

“Better.”

 

“A trillion.”

 

“Even better.”

 

“I don’t know what comes after a trillion.”

 

“Neither do I,” Justin laughed.  “But I think maybe a trillion will do.”

 

“So easily satisfied,“ Brian smirked.

 

“Don’t be too sure.  You may have to give me half that trillion tonight.”

 

“I’m ready,” Brian stated, as they pulled up in front of the loft.

 

They raced into the building and up the stairs.  The elevator would have been torture.  Brian got them into the loft as fast as he could.  He slammed and locked the door.

 

“No one’s interrupting us tonight.”

 

He grabbed Justin and pulled him against his chest.  Their mouths melded together and Brian’s heart pounded.  This was the way it should be.  Only one thing could make it better.

 

He started pulling off Justin’s clothes, still kissing him and edging them both toward the bedroom.  Justin got Brian’s suit jacket off.  It was the silk Armani.  He loved the feel of it.  He started on the buttons to Brian’s shirt.

 

They had reached the bed by then.  Brian pushed Justin backwards onto the bed, and pulled off his shoes, pants and underwear.  Justin’s cock sprang up, dripping pre-cum.

 

“Somebody’s missed me,” Brian observed, taking off his shirt.

 

He started to undo his trousers, when Justin said, “Don’t.  Leave them on.  I want to feel the silk when you fuck me.”  He unzipped Brian’s fly, and pulled out the straining cock.  He gave it a gentle kiss on the tip and licked up the pre-cum.

 

“God, Justin,” Brian groaned.

 

“I can’t wait, Brian.”

 

Brian stuck a pillow under Justin’s ass and knelt on the floor, pushing Justin’s knees up.  His tongue licked Justin’s pucker and then dove inside.  Justin tasted so good.  His tongue went to work loosening the hole, diving deeper and deeper.  Justin moaned and writhed in ecstasy.  Brian loved that sound.

 

“Fuck me now!  I can’t wait!” Justin begged.

 

“It’s going to be fast and hard,” Brian warned, barely in control, as he slipped on a condom and lube.

 

“Now!” Justin demanded.

 

Brian rammed all the way in. 

 

Justin yelled, “Yes. Oh, yes!”

 

Justin’s knees were on Brian’s shoulders, and Brian bent over to kiss him.  Justin smiled up at him.  'Sunshine,' Brian thought, but then nature took over and all rational thought ceased.

 

He rocked into Justin, the silk of his pants hitting Justin’s ass with each thrust.  Justin met each stroke, begging for more.

 

“I’m going to shoot,” Justin gasped.  As the first squirt of cum hit his chest, Brian reached his own shattering orgasm.

 

“Oh, fuck,” Brian groaned, collapsing on top of Justin, still trapped inside him.

 

“God, that’s what I have been wanting for so long,” Justin whispered, kissing Brian’s mouth and face.

 

Brian started to move.  “No, stay inside me a little longer,” Justin asked.

 

“Sure.  Whatever you want,” and Brian kissed him with such tenderness and longing that Justin almost cried.

 

After a few minutes, Brian said, “Can I take my pants off now?”

 

“Always the romantic,” Justin teased.  “Go ahead.”

 

Brian eased his cock out of Justin and disposed of the condom.  He took off his pants and underwear.  His cock sprang up immediately, ready for more action.

 

“Don’t you ever get enough?” Justin joked.

 

“I told you there’s no such thing as enough, especially where you’re concerned.”

 

“You say such sweet things.”

 

“Mush!” said Brian.  “We just did ‘fast and hard’.  Are you ready for ‘slow and hard’?”

 

“I’m always ready.”

 

“I know.  That’s one of the many things I love about you.”

 

Justin looked at him.  Brian realized that he had almost said those words.  Justin looked like he was holding his breath.

 

“Work in progress,” Brian said, and Justin smiled, letting out his breath.

 

Brian slid over closer to Justin on the bed.  He kissed Justin’s mouth and started down his neck.  He licked, tugged, kissed and sucked his way down Justin’s body, giving each area its due.  He worked on Justin’s nipples, navel, tender insides of his thighs, even sucked his toes.  Justin moaned and whimpered, his cock straining and dripping.

 

“Ready for number two of a trillion?” Brian asked.

 

“Let’s get it on,” Justin replied.

 

Brian rolled Justin over, spreading his ass cheeks.  His beautiful little hole spasmed a welcome.  Brian had a condom on in no time and plunged in again.  This time he went slow at first, relishing each thrust, changing the angle and speed as he progressed.  Justin grunted his approval.  Brian smiled in response.  He rocked in and out, Justin meeting each stroke and wanting more.

 

'He’s as insatiable as I am,' Brian thought.  They were made for each other.  “This is the way it’s supposed to be,” Brian whispered in Justin’s ear, and he kissed his neck.

 

“Couldn’t be better,” Justin agreed.

 

Brian felt his balls constrict and increased his speed.  He reached under and grabbed Justin’s cock.

 

“Come with me,” he whispered against Justin’s neck.

 

“I’m there. Oh, oh, now, Brian!”

 

Brian collapsed on top of Justin, his orgasm leaving him spent and senseless.

 

They lay like that for a while until their senses began to return to normal.

 

“I’m covered in sweat and cum,” Brian said, rolling onto his back and disposing of the condom.

 

“I know,” Justin said.  “You smell wonderful.  I’m going to eat you.”  He crawled on top of Brian, licking at the sweat and cum on Brian’s chest.  “Taste’s great.”

 

“It’s your cum,” Brian observed, sticking his tongue in his cheek.

 

“We can fix that.”  Justin worked his way down to Brian’s cock and started sucking.

 

“Can’t we rest for a minute?” Brian asked.

 

“This is only number three.  We have almost half a trillion left to do,” Justin teased.

 

“My God, you’re serious,” and Brian tried to look horrified.

 

“Of course.  I don’t take bragging likely.  You’ll have to prove yourself, old man.”

 

“Then don’t stop.  I’m ready if you are,” said Brian, noting that his cock seemed to be very ready.

 

“You wicked, wicked man!” Justin said.

 

“Wicked, wicked boy,” was the reply.

 

“After all, a trillion’s not really so many.”

 

They both laughed, happy to be together, content to stay like this forever.