"Are you fucking nuts, Geoffrey?" Brian yelled.

Brian saw Geoffrey cringe, but he quickly straightened up.  "It's tradition," Geoffrey said and prepared to duck.

"There is no fucking way I'm wearing a Santa suit," Brian continued to rant.  "You can tell them to shove their fucking presents up their collective asses, because Santa ain't comin' to town!"

"But Brian, the mayor always…"

"Fuck!  I don't want to hear it," Brian said in his most annoyed and emphatic voice.  "Do you sit in your fucking office every day and think up these fucking unbelievable things for me to do?"

"Of course not," Geoffrey said getting his back up.  "I'm merely informing you of what has been done in the past and what's expected of you the day after tomorrow."

"Well, they can keep on expecting because I'm not fucking doing it."

"Very well, I'll inform them," Geoffrey said with a cold glare.

"And just who are 'them'?"

"The Council, the heads of city departments…"

"And the mayor plays fucking Santa and hands out presents to their families?" Brian asked shaking his head.

Geoffrey wondered if he was making progress since Brian was now asking questions not just ranting and refusing to have any part of it.  "Every year since I've been here, and many years before that," Geoffrey told him.

"Jesus," Brian said.  "I thought there would be a lot of difficult things about this job, but who knew this crap would be the worst part of it?"

"Does that mean that you're going to do it?" Geoffrey asked stifling his smirk.

"I am not wearing a fucking fat suit!"

"Then how will you be Santa?"

"I don't fucking know, but I'm going to talk to Justin about it before I decide anything."

Geoffrey grinned to himself.  Everyone in the mayor's office had learned that Justin could get Brian to do just about anything.  Things were looking up.  "As you wish, Mr. Mayor," Geoffrey said formally and took his leave.  He heaved a sigh of relief as he shut the door behind him.

"You're still alive?" Cynthia said smiling at him.

"It was touch and go for a minute."

"He's going to do it?" Cynthia asked in amazement.

"He's going to talk to Justin about it," Geoffrey said.

They grinned at each other.  They both knew what that meant.

Inside Brian's office the mayor was fuming.  What the hell did playing Santa have to do with being a good mayor?  He was going to see what he could do about changing some of these asinine traditions.

                                                                -----

When Brian broached the subject with Justin, the blond burst out laughing.  Brian immediately took offense and threatened to kill his lover.  It took Justin several blowjobs to calm him down and get him back to some semblance of normal.

When things were calmer, Justin decided he better get the whole story.  "So are you going to play Santa?"

Brian glared at him.  "I don't know," he said weakly.  "I don't think I can.  I can just hear people laughing at me."

"Is that what you're afraid of, that people will laugh at you?"

"Nobody laughs at me," Brian said defiantly.

"Nobody will laugh at you if you play Santa.  They'll just be grateful that you're doing it."

"Oh sure.  I can already hear Ted and Emmett and Debbie…"

"They don't even have to know."

"They'll find out.  This kind of thing always comes back to haunt me."

"Have you played Santa before?"

"Yes."

"You have?  When?"

"Many years ago."

"But why?  How did you get to do that?"

"Get to do it?" Brian asked incredulously.  "I was forced."

"What do you mean … forced?"

"I … did it as a dare."

Justin giggled.  "What kind of dare?"

"Are you sure you want to hear all the gory details?"

"Definitely," Justin replied trying to keep a straight face.

"Oh fuck!" Brian grimaced.  "I was in university and I came to Deb's just before Christmas.  Michael was supposed to be Santa at the Big Q.  He didn't want to do it.  See," Brian said thoughtfully like this had just occurred to him, "I'm not the only one who doesn't want to be part of this crap."

"Just tell me what happened," Justin sighed.

"Mikey was whining and bitching about having to do it."  Justin nodded knowing exactly what that would sound like.  "I told him to stop being a baby.  He got really mad and dared me to do it in his place.  Of course, I said I wouldn't do it, so he said I had no right to complain about him not wanting to do it.  I said any idiot could be Santa and he dared me again.  He said I was a bigger coward than him.  I couldn't let that pass so I said I'd do it."

"So if I dare you to do something and call you a coward if you refuse, then you'll do it?" Justin asked with an evil grin on his face. 

Brian could tell he was thinking up things to dare him to do.  Brian scowled at him.  "Not hardly.  I learned my fucking lesson that day."

"So you were Santa at the Big Q?"

"Yeah, for one day.  They asked me never to do that again."

"Who asked you?"

"The manager of the Big Q."

"What happened?"

"Well, there were all these kids."

"There usually are when Santa's around."

"Smartass!  They really got on my nerves after awhile, all that crying and bitching and greed."

"What did you do?" Justin asked knowing that it was not going to be good.

"I'd about had it when this fucking little bastard comes up and plunks himself on my knee.  He had to be at least ten, spawn of Satan, you know the type.  He pulls my beard down and sticks his tongue out at me.  I wanted to spank him, and not in a good way, but I restrained myself and asked him what he wanted for Christmas.  He told me that he knew I wasn't the real Santa and his parents had already bought all the toys he wanted.  I asked him why he was wasting my time then, and he said that I was a piss poor Santa.  I shoved him off my lap and he landed on his fat little ass.  He started screaming then, running around the store knocking stuff over and threatening to sue.  The manager gave him some free toys and told me never to come back to his store."

Justin shook his head.  "Only you!"

"What do you mean 'only me'?  It was that little fucker's fault."

"But you could have reacted differently."

"No, I couldn't.  He deserved much worse."

"So did Michael and Debbie tease you?"

"Big time."

"And that's why you won't be Santa and you hate Christmas?"

"I hate Christmas for lots of reasons, but I guess that's one of them."

"I'll do it," Justin said suddenly.

"Do what?"

"I'll play Santa in your place.  You can be my elf."

"Do I look like an elf?"

"If Will Farrell can be an elf, so can you."

"You don't have to do that," Brian said sincerely.

"I don't mind.  It might be fun."

"Fat suit and all?"

"Nobody will know who I am.  I like kids."

"I know you do and I appreciate the offer," Brian said continuing to be amazed by the size of Justin's heart.  "But it's supposed to be the mayor who is Santa."

"I could be the elf if you decide to do it."

"You'd come with me and do that?" Brian asked.

"Of course."

"And you'd keep me from killing any obnoxious little twits?"

"I'll do my best."

Brian thought for a moment.  "Then maybe I could do it."

"And you might even like it," Justin said coming to sit on his knee and give him a kiss.

"Let's not get too far removed from reality," Brian said with a grimace.

"Ah, you're a big softie.  I'll get you to like Christmas yet," Justin said kissing Brian again.  The kiss deepened and they both knew that Santa was going to get laid in just a moment or two.

                                                              -----

When Brian told Geoffrey that he was going to play Santa, he did not appreciate the knowing grin that appeared on his protocol officer's face.

"What are you grinning at?" he asked testily.  "Oh, let me guess, you and Emmett are fucking like rabbits and you can't wipe the grin off your face?"

Geoffrey blushed from the top of his head to the tips of his toes.  Brian couldn't see his toes, but he was sure that they would be scarlet too.

Geoffrey cleared his throat but couldn't meet Brian's gaze.  "Um … I don't think that's any of your business."

"It isn't," Brian said immediately regretting putting the man on the spot.  "I shouldn't have been so … forward."

"You're right, you shouldn't!" Geoffrey stated emphatically.  "Have you been talking to Emmett?"

"That was just a lucky guess.  I haven't seen Emmett since the party," Brian admitted.  "I'm … glad that you two have found each other," Brian added and he meant that.  He liked Emmett and hated how Ted had treated him.  If Emmett and Geoffrey could be happy together, then good for them.

"We're going out tonight," Geoffrey said wanting to share his excitement and happiness with someone.

"That's great, Geoffrey.  Be nice to him," Brian said and immediately regretted saying that.

"I understand he and Ted had a pretty rough time."

"They did."

"I won't hurt him," Geoffrey stated.  "I … like him … a lot.  And … I want to thank you for introducing us."

"I think he found you before I got to introduce you," Brian added quickly.  He didn't want credit or thanks.

Geoffrey cleared his throat and decided that they were both sufficiently embarrassed so he should change the subject.  "I'll send up the tailor with the Santa suit for your fitting."

"A fitting?" Brian asked.  "You've got to be kidding."

"We want you to look good," Geoffrey said with a smirk as he started towards the door.  The last thing he heard before he closed it behind him was, "Fuck!"

                                                                -----

Brian sat on the big chair in the lobby of City Hall.  He adjusted the big belly stuffed beneath his Santa suit, took the next present and called the name that was on the tag.  A cute little girl named Millie came forward.  Brian lifted her onto his knee.

"I love you, Santa," she said and put her arms around Brian's neck. 

Brian kissed the top of her head and saw Justin smiling at him.  Justin was dressed as the most delectable elf that Brian had ever seen.  His tights did positively obscene things to his ass and were filled out so alluringly by his well endowed package.  Brian shifted uncomfortably as he set Millie down.  He needed to concentrate on his job, not Justin's ass.

Justin handed him the next package and he called, "Jason Mathers."

A boy about ten walked towards him and he immediately flashed back to the little asshole at the Big Q.  He stifled a groan and steeled himself to withstand whatever this boy might do.

"Hi, Santa," Jason said.

"Hi, Jason.  I don't suppose you want to sit on my knee."

"No thanks.  I'm too big for that."

"I thought so.  How be I shake your hand and your parents can get their picture."

"Thanks, Santa."  Jason shook Brian's hand while his parents snapped their photo.  Brian gave the boy his present and he walked back to his seat.  Brian heaved a sigh of relief.  So far the kids had been great, polite and appreciative.

"You're doing a great job, Brian," Justin said as he handed him the next present.

"Think I've found my true calling in life?" Brian asked.  Justin could tell there was a smirk under the beard.

"I don't know if I'd go quite that far," Justin said with a grin.  He knew Brian probably wanted to stick his tongue out at him, but the man refrained himself and called the next name.

The rest of the kids came forward and got their present and a picture with Santa Mayor.  They all must have been forewarned to behave themselves because there were no really obnoxious children at all.  There were a couple of babies that cried when they were handed to Brian.  He looked like he wanted to drop them and run, but Justin stepped in and held a rattle over them or made a face or hummed a little tune and they calmed down while their picture was taken.

Brian had no idea how many families would be there.  As they approached what had to be the hundredth child, Justin could see his patience beginning to wear out.  The little girl who was next was very good and gave Santa a kiss.  As she stepped down to her parents, Justin whispered, "Three more."  Brian smiled gratefully.  He handed out the next two gifts to a pair of twins who thanked him and smiled angelically.

"One more," Justin grinned, handing him the last present.

Brian read the name and smiled.  "Gus Marcus-Peterson," he called.

Gus ran up and climbed onto Santa's knee.  He threw his arms around Brian's neck.  "Daddy Santa," he cooed in Brian's ear.

"Have you been a good boy, Gus?" Brian asked.

Gus nodded.  "I love you, Daddy" he said.

"I love you too, Sonny Boy," Brian whispered in his ear.  Gus giggled as Brian's breath tickled his ear.

Melanie was filming the encounter and Lindsay stood off to the side waiting for her son.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Brian said standing up and still holding his son, "and all the good little boys and girls that have attended our party today, I hope you have enjoyed yourselves.  I want to thank you for your hard work on behalf of the city of Pittsburgh, and wish you all the very best Christmas."

There was a round of applause and then Brian stepped down and handed Gus back to his mother.

People began to get up and retrieve their coats.  As they made their way out of City Hall most of them came over to Brian to say what a great job he had done as Santa and to thank him for his efforts.  Brian and Justin stood side by side talking to people and wishing them happy holidays. 

As the last few made their way out, Brian sighed.  "I'm glad that's over."

"I am so proud of you," Justin said smiling at him.

"I am so horny," Brian whispered back.  "Every time you bent over to pick up a present I wanted to ram my cock up that beautiful ass of yours."

"Did you notice how it was always turned in your direction?"

Brian frowned.  "You little shit!"

"I had to keep you entertained somehow.  We couldn't have any murdered children at the end of the party," Justin chuckled.

"I didn't get angry once."

"I know.  I'm amazed and relieved."

"Can we go home now?" Brian asked leering lustfully at Justin's crotch.

"Say goodbye to your son like a good little boy, and elfie will take you home."

"Thanks, elfie."  Brian took Gus from Lindsay and gave the boy a kiss.  "I'll see you tomorrow for Christmas, Sonny Boy."

"Are you wearing the costume?" Melanie asked with a smirk.

"No!" Brian replied emphatically.  "I've had enough of this thing."

"You did a good job, Brian," Lindsay told him.  "I'm proud of you."  She glared at Melanie warning her not to say anything bad about Brian and his role of Santa.

"Bye, Daddy Santa," Melanie said as Lindsay dragged her and Gus away.

"Let's get the fuck out of here?  Do you see the limo?" Brian asked peering out the door. 

"Down the block," Justin said.  "Shall we walk or call Chuck on the cell?"

"Oh, fuck," Brian said.  "I'm getting used to this suit.  Let's walk.  Maybe I'll pick up a reindeer along the way."

Justin giggled as he leaned into Brian.  They quickly made their way to the limo and Chuck pulled away.  Brian's hand found its way to Justin's crotch and squeezed.  Justin moaned and let his head fall back against the seat.

"I'm tired," Justin admitted.  "You must be tired too."

"Not too tired," Brian said stroking Justin's cock through his tights.

"So I see," Justin said taking hold of Brian's hand and stopping the motion.  "Let's wait till we get home."

"Okay," Brian agreed.  "Once I get you on that bed I'm not letting you up until Christmas dinner tomorrow."

"Promises, promises," Justin giggled.

"Count on it."

"We have to get up and open our presents."

"I already have my present," Brian said.

"What present?  Have you been peeking?" Justin asked annoyed if that's what Brian had done.

"No, I haven't been peeking.  I got my present a long time ago when you walked into my office that night and told me that I should take you back."  Brian smiled at his partner.

Justin's sunshine smile filled the back of the limo.  "Did you have too much eggnog at the party?" Justin asked with a giggle of pure pleasure.

"No, and I mean it.  You are the best present I could ever get, and today you even managed to give me some Christmas spirit."

Justin's smile got even bigger and more radiant before he was crushed in Brian's arms.  "It's going to be the best Christmas ever," Justin thought as his lips found Brian's.


 Return to Mayor Kinney Index