Image Is Everything

Chapter Eight

Following the fitting with the tailor Justin had decided to go to dinner with Brian. He had an ulterior motive. He wanted to get Brian to be part of the ad campaign for Mark Phillips line of clothing. He knew Brian had quit modeling a few years ago but Justin thought Brian still looked great. For this new venture into modeling he wanted to be paired with someone that he knew and liked. Brian was that someone. In fact the more time he spent around the man the more he did like him.

He had known no openly gay people before he had come out to his family. When he had gone to Liberty Avenue the first time, he had been running away from the disapproval of his father. It had not been a pleasant experience. The only good thing about it had been Ethan. They had found each other. Since then Justin had experienced little that was not focused around Ethan and the violin player's life.

Justin had some friends at PIFA, acquaintances mostly. Some of them were gay, but they were not such good friends that he could discuss being gay with them. Justin was intrigued by Brian and his forthright attitude towards his sexuality. He liked the openness and fearlessness that seemed to personify Brian at least as far as his sexuality went. He wondered what it would be like to be so unafraid and live like Brian did.

In fact Justin found himself thinking and dreaming about Brian Kinney far too much these days. Several mornings lately he had awakened from dreams of Brian making love to him. He had been so hard that it hurt. Ethan had been very happy to help him relieve the problem, each time thinking that Justin was filled with desire for him. In truth Justin had never felt great desire for Ethan. They made love and he got off. They both got off, but it wasn't soul shattering or life altering stuff. But it was good. He had to remember that it was good … and safe. Ethan was safe. Brian was a heat seeking missile waiting to consume him.

He knew that Brian wanted him. He wanted Brian too, if he was honest with himself. The three stolen kisses they had shared had rocked him to the core. And what was worse was that they held the promise of even more to come. Justin knew he wanted to experience that … with Brian.

He also knew that he owed Ethan a lot. He knew that Ethan loved him. He knew that he should not betray Ethan's love. He needed to remain faithful to what they had. But that didn't stop him from wanting Brian.

Justin had been lost in thought while Brian was driving. He looked up and felt a jolt of panic. "Why are we here? Brian, why are we on Liberty Avenue?"

"I'm taking you to the best greasy spoon in the city," Brian said with a smirk.

"I don't want to be here. Take me somewhere else." Justin could feel the panic rising and Ethan wouldn't be there to protect him.

"Justin, calm down," Brian said in a level voice. "Liberty Avenue is not a bad place. You had a bad experience the first time you came here, but it is a place, as a gay man, that you should get to know."

"I … I don't think so," Justin said looking around nervously. He wondered if that guy who had tried to pick him up and had refused to take no for an answer would be around somewhere.

"You're with me. I won't let anything happen that you don't want to happen," Brian promised.

Justin relaxed a little hearing that. "Okay," Justin said uncertainly.

They got out of the car and walked towards the Liberty Diner.

"This is it," Brian said with a smirk. He pushed the door open.

It was Monday night so it wasn't very crowded and they quickly found a booth. Justin looked around at the tables filled with same sex couples. Some were kissing and making out. He couldn't believe they felt free to act like that in public.

"Who's your little friend?" a loud voice asked.

Justin turned to see the blowsy redhead waitress who stood by their booth. She had a rude T-shirt and a vest covered with more rude buttons and some that Justin had no idea what they meant.

"Meet Justin Taylor," Brian's voice said.

"Hello, Justin Taylor," the redhead said with a big smile.

"Hi," Justin replied shyly.

"Justin, this is Debbie."

Justin nodded not sure what to make of this woman.

"Burger and fries?" Brian asked Justin. Justin nodded again. "Make it two." Justin noted the look Debbie gave Brian. He wondered how well they knew each other. "And I'll have a coffee and…?"

Justin looked up as Brian paused. "Coke," he said.

"Coming right up," Debbie said as she bustled away.

"Wow!" Justin reacted. "What a freak!"

"She takes a little getting used to but you couldn't ask for a nicer person under all those buttons. She's been like a mother to me for years," Brian explained.

"She has? Oh my God, I'm sorry, Brian. I didn't mean to insult her."

"It's okay. If you hang around long enough, you'll grow to love her too." Shit! Had he just said that?

Justin watched the conflicting emotions pass across Brian's face. The man wasn't always as cool as he would like you to believe. Justin watched a couple of men walk by to the bathroom. "Do they always go together?" he asked with a frown.

"They won't be pissing … unless it's as an after thought," Brian said with his tongue in his cheek.

"Oh! Ewwwwww," Justin reacted.

Brian chuckled. "Get used to it. It's a fact of life in this community. You fuck wherever and whenever you get the opportunity."

Justin's eyes were quite large as he listened to Brian. "Does that include you?"

"Of course," Brian said in his best bored voice.

"I didn't know about any of this," Justin said shaking his head.

"It's all about sex. It's about creating an image that works for you so that you can draw the types of tricks you want. You'll see people in skintight clothes, people with colored and spiked hair, people who may or may not be male, people with the ass cut out of their pants … like that guy." Brian waved his coffee cup in the direction of a guy wearing leather pants exactly like that.

Justin's mouth hung open as he looked around the diner. This was a whole world that he hadn't even known existed. "What about love and relationships?" he had to ask.

Brian snorted. "I don't believe in either. Most of the people on Liberty Avenue would agree with me."

"Not all of them," Debbie chimed in setting their burgers down in front of them. "Some people like my son want a kind, loving relationship with someone who isn't an asshole."

"Thanks for the commentary," Brian said sarcastically.

"Anytime, asshole. Maybe some day I'll convince you that it's true."

Debbie moved away to look after some other customers.

"It doesn't sound like she approves of your lifestyle," Justin said.

"She never has. She's a romantic at heart. That gets you hurt nine times out of ten."

"But what about the tenth time? Wouldn't it be worth it to find love?"

Brian shook his head. "Another fucking romantic! I believe in fucking not love, and you would be wise to adopt the same philosophy."

"Why would I want to do that?" Justin asked. "I love Ethan."

"Shit! I forgot. And here I'd gone almost two hours without thinking about your fucking boyfriend."

Justin giggled. Brian really was quite funny, even though what he said was rather disturbing.

They finished up their burgers with Justin cleaning his plate and accepting most of Brian's fries which had been offered to him.

"You need to take it easy on the fats and carbs," Brian warned. "They want you nice and lean in modeling."

"Oh," Justin said. "I never thought about that. I was hungry."

"At your age, you can get away with meals like that, but eventually you'll have to start being careful."

"You think I'll be around that long?"

"I think you could be … if that's what you want to do."

Justin smiled. He liked to hear compliments and positive statements about him. He especially liked to hear them from Brian. "So how come you watch what you eat when you don't model anymore?"

Brian made a face. "I still have an image to uphold."

"And what image is that?" Justin asked wanting to hear what Brian would say.

"I'm the best fuck on Liberty Avenue, in Pittsburg," he amended. "Hell, in the whole fucking world."

"And modest too."

Brian snorted. "I'm smart, sophisticated, talented. Anybody would be happy to be with me or work with me."

Justin knew that what Brian said was true. "You forgot one thing," Justin said. "You're beautiful." Brian knew he was blushing in spite of himself. "Brian, do the shoot with me for Mark Phillips clothes?"

"What are you talking about? I said there was no way."

"I heard what Alphonse said to you about the clothes Mark had sent."

"An eavesdropper as well as a voyeur," Brian said sarcastically. "You are a man of many talents."

Justin blushed a bit but chose to ignore the implied insult. He wanted Brian to do the shoot with him. "I'm kind of scared about this whole process. I'm glad you will be taking the pictures of me, but I'm worried about working with another model. I want you."

"We don't always get what we want," Brian stated smugly.

"Please, I'm serious. I would really appreciate it if you would do it."

"Let's go," Brian said sliding out of the booth.

"Brian…"

"Drop it."

Justin knew he had better shut up. He was making Brian mad. He followed the photographer out of the diner after Brian threw down quite a lot of money on the table.

"I'm sorry," Justin said as they got into the Corvette. "I won't mention it again."

"Good," Brian said as he drove Justin back to his ugly apartment where Ethan would surely be waiting.

A few minutes later Brian was pulling the 'Vette up to the front of Justin's building.

"Thanks for being there with me today," Justin said sincerely.

"No problem."

"I really am nervous about this whole modeling thing. I don't want to let anyone down."

"You won't."

Justin turned to stare at Brian's profile. He made no move to get out of the car. Finally Brian turned to see what was taking the young man so long. As he did Justin leaned forward and they were kissing once again.

Brian still had his seat belt on but Justin had removed his to get out. Brian was startled at first, but he wasn't about to refuse this overture. He pulled Justin towards him trapping the young man between his body and the steering wheel. He leaned down to kiss the lips that he had been thinking about all day.

Justin whimpered as he felt Brian kiss him back. He opened his mouth to allow Brian entrance. He felt Brian's tongue snake in and explore all the parts of his mouth. The kiss went on and on. Justin moaned needing air but not wanting to separate from Brian.

Finally Brian pulled back. He groaned as his lips left Justin's. They clung together in the awkward position inside the small car. Their chests heaved and they gulped for air.

"I want you," Brian managed to get out as he looked into the blue eyes cloudy with lust.

Justin didn't say anything. He merely leaned up and snaked his hand behind Brian's head to start another kiss. This time it was Justin's tongue demanding entrance into Brian's mouth. He plunged his tongue in, dueling with Brian's. They pressed against each other until there was no room for air. Lips welding together, hearts pounding, and cocks throbbing, they clung to each other as the kiss ended and they were able to breathe once more.

"Jesus," Brian groaned.

"Yeah," Justin breathed as his lungs were able to fill with air.

Suddenly Justin pulled away, opened the door and ran into the building. Brian groaned as he shifted in his seat trying to relieve the pull on his pants.

"What the fuck was that?" Brian wondered. And more to the point what was he going to do about it?

He needed to hit the backroom at Babylon. He wasn't sure what he would find on a Monday night, but he needed to get a blowjob quick.

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