Close to Home II
+ Eleven +
Brian sat at his desk staring at his computer. He was supposed to be working but he was actually thinking about Justin and what he could do about the current situation with the young man. Suddenly the computer pinged indicating he had mail. He started to click on it, and then hesitated. It might be Justin and that would be good. It might not be Justin and that would be bad. It might be Justin telling him to fuck off and that would be the worst of all. Brian took a deep breath and opened the e-mail.
Seems like you have been trying to get in touch with me. I thought you wanted me to leave you alone, so that's what I've been doing.
The terseness of your one and only e-mail left me gasping for more. I marvel at the amount of time and effort it must have taken you, a seasoned ad man, to reduce your thoughts to the bare essentials and convey them in so very few, but yet such carefully chosen words. I can't express how impressed I am. I'm beginning to think PP must stand for "Pure Poo".
If you want to talk come on down.
Brian chuckled out loud. "Pure Poo", the little twat! Then he stared more closely at the e-mail. It didn't sound like Justin was mad. The paragraph about "Poo" sounded tongue in cheek, but the "Poo" part sounded like Justin didn't believe him. Then there was the invitation or request or ultimatum for him to go down to Justin's loft. Brian wished he knew which interpretation to make of that statement.
He started to shut down his computer, but changed his mind and after clicking a couple of times, he printed off a sheet. He folded it carefully and put it in his pocket. Wheeling over to the loft door, Brian hesitated. He wanted to make up with Justin, and this overture made it sound like Justin was ready to get back on better terms with him, but
Brian thought back to all the times he had refused to go after anybody, and technically that was what Justin was demanding, that Brian come after him. Sitting in his chair staring at the door, Brian weighed his options. He wanted Justin back. He could call and maybe convince Justin to come up, play the cripple card. But he didn't want to do that. He suspected maybe this was a test Justin was putting him to, and he didn't want to fail. He had never chased after anyone, but he had never had to. They always came to him. But that was then, and this was now.
Like he had a choice anyway! He knew he was inexorably tied to the beautiful young man downstairs. He had known that from the first moments he had sensed Justin's presence in the building. And when Justin had returned his interest, it had been the best day of his life. He wanted Justin and he would go to the ends of the Earth to get him. He might as well admit that to himself.
He pulled back the loft door feeling confident and scared and elated and worried. He wondered if this was what love felt like. He was maybe going to take the chance to find out. He hit the button for the elevator.
As the elevator descended Brian felt his heart pounding in his chest. "Calm down and don't fuck this up," Brian whispered to himself.
The elevator began to slow and Brian could see the door to Justin's loft. It stood open. Brian had to grin. The little shit did know him pretty well. He pushed up the gate and rolled out, yanking the gate down behind him. He knew Justin would hear it and wondered if he'd come to the door. When no one appeared, he rolled over to the door and peered inside.
"'Bout time you got here," Justin said. He was sitting on his sofa staring at the door.
"Been sitting there long?" Brian asked sucking in his lips.
"Just since I sent the e-mail."
"Fucking sure of yourself, aren't you?"
"Maybe," Justin said with one of those smiles.
At that moment Brian knew whatever he had to do to get Justin back and have those smiles, he would do it. He was so fucked. "I did miss you, you know. It wasn't 'poo'."
Justin chuckled. "I thought that might get your attention."
"You do believe that I missed you?" Brian asked with that funny grin that made him look like a guilty, little boy.
"I believe you, big guy."
Brian smiled. It sounded like the old Justin might be back. "What made you finally answer all my pleas for reconciliation?"
Justin snorted. "Pleas? You call those pleas? 'You didn't let me explain, Justin. I miss you, Justin.' Humph!" Justin imitated Brian's falsetto that he used when being sarcastic.
"A lot," Brian added. "I missed you a lot."
"Yeah, I saw that part in your five word e-mail," Justin griped. "You are the master of brevity."
Brian snorted. "One of my best ad campaigns was three words," he bragged.
"Oh, and what were the three words?"
"Eat the meat," Brian declared.
"Eat the fucking meat?" Justin asked in amazement. "What the hell was that for?"
"Shit!" Justin reacted shaking his head.
"So you didn't say why you finally decided to answer my pleas," Brian persisted.
"Michael?" Brian said in bewilderment.
"He paid me a visit after your doctor's appointment."
"What the fuck for?"
"He thought I was being unreasonable and making you miserable."
"Like a bear with a sore paw to quote the man."
"I'm no bear," Brian said doing his best to look offended.
Justin giggled. "But you do have your moments," Justin teased.
Brian snorted. "So are we all right?"
Brian glanced at Justin. He tried to keep the hurt out of his eyes. "We're not?" he asked tentatively.
"I don't know what I did that made you want to send me away," Justin said. He had a pretty good idea but he wanted Brian to tell him.
"You " Brian hesitated.
"Just fucking say it," Justin said.
"You were hovering."
"Hovering? I was fucking worried about you."
"I know, but it was too much." Brian drew in a breath. "I want you to read something," he said slowly. Justin stared at him wondering what it might be. Brian reached in his pocket and drew out the sheet of paper. He handed it to Justin. "Read it," he whispered.
Justin unfolded the paper with some trepidation. He had no idea what Brian wanted him to look at. He began reading:
I'm not going to apologize for what happened tonight, because I think we need to sort out a few things. Please read the rest of this before you delete it. It may be one of the most important things I've ever written.
When I first met you, you treated me like any other person, and that was what I loved about you. I never felt like a cripple. You got me to venture out into the world again. You helped me reclaim some semblance of my life. I want to thank you for that.
Ever since I had the episode of bladder problems things have changed. You've started to treat me the way they did in the hospital. That's why I stopped seeing my friends back then. I couldn't stand their worry and pity and their need to never let me be alone. There are times I actually like being alone. I lived alone for a long time and I've been alone a lot ever since the accident.
I wish I had been able to tell you all this before you ran out, but I was afraid as soon as I started to say I needed some space, you would take it the wrong way, and you did.
You have become very important to me since we finally met. I can't envision my life without you. I want you near me. I need you. Maybe just not hovering over me twenty-four-seven.
I hope that doesn't sound like a put-down, because it's not meant that way. I want to go back to how we were when we first met. Do you think we can do that?
Justin finished reading the e-mail and looked up at Brian. He knew there were tears in his eyes. "When did you write this?"
"Just before I sent you the shorter version."
"Why didn't you send me this one?" Justin had to know.
"I I'm not good at talking about stuff like that and I thought you might tell me to fuck off."
"Jesus, you are dumb about stuff."
"I would have been up at your place in a shot if you had sent this."
"Fucking tell me when something's bugging you. I did figure it out you know, even without this letter. But I would have got it a lot sooner if you had sent it."
"You have it now," Brian said with puppy dog eyes.
"Yeah, I won't hover anymore. But you scared the shit out of me, you know. I I was afraid I was going to lose you."
"Justin, I'm not going to sugar coat it. Life with a cripple isn't easy, and it won't get easier, only harder."
"I told you I'm in for the long haul if you'll let me."
"I'll let you," Brian said fighting back the tears of relief that Justin's statement engendered.
Justin practically leapt from the couch and landed in Brian's lap. His lips sought the ones that he had become so familiar with and that he wanted so much. A moan escaped both of them as tongues battled and air was sucked out. Finally Justin released Brian's mouth.
"Fuck, I missed you," Justin gasped.
"How long has it been?" Brian breathed.
"Don't you mean decades or centuries?"
"I really am sorry, Brian. I wasn't getting enough sleep. I know I was watching you all the time, but I was waiting for something else bad to happen. I was afraid, and I was trying to be chipper "
"Chipper?" Brian asked with a snort. "I like you better when you're more like a wood chipper than pretending to be sweet."
"Hey, I am sweet," Justin declared.
"Yes, especially the way you taste," Brian grinned, "but I'm kind of fond of grumpy, sarcastic Justin too. However, I would like to show Sweet Justin how much I think of him."
"You would? I like the sound of that."
"Maybe you should close the door before I begin."
"Is it going to be X-rated?"
"Ooh, I'm getting all hot and bothered."
"And I haven't even started."
Justin shut the door to his loft and turned back to Brian with a smile. "Ready?" he asked.
"Want a ride?" Brian said indicating his lap.
"Are we going somewhere?"
"Okaaay," Justin said with a giggle as he slid onto Brian's lap.
Justin had an actual bedroom so Brian wheeled them into it and stopped by the bed. He looked tentatively at the bed. Getting in and out of it would be difficult without his grab bar, but he hadn't done all those exercises for nothing.
"Off, bouncy butt," Brian commanded as Justin stood up with a giggle. It was good to play again. Justin was about to offer to help Brian get onto the bed when he thought better of it. He stood waiting. "Get out of those clothes," Brian ordered as he hoisted himself out of his chair and onto the bed, emitting a loud grunt as he did so.
Justin began divesting himself of his clothes. He watched Brian shove off his jeans, shirt and shoes. He wiggled his underwear out from his butt and pulled it down his legs. Justin was naked by this point and watched with interest.
"What?" Brian asked sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Um nothing," Justin said with a frown. He'd talk to Brian later. Right now he wanted Brian to show him how much he had missed him. "Where do you want me?"
Justin slid onto the bed and stretched out on his back. Brian turned onto his stomach and pulled himself across the bed towards Justin's body, his feet hanging over the edge. He reached towards Justin and ran his hand down the man's chest and continued down his thigh bypassing his groin. Justin moaned slightly.
"Stay still and enjoy," Brian said with a smirk.
Justin closed his eyes and snuggled into the comforter that covered his bed. He felt Brian inch closer and then the soft, sure lips starting kissing him everywhere. Brian started at his hip and worked his way up his side to his throat. He nuzzled and nipped at the hollow at Justin's collarbone. Justin moaned louder as that spot had always been one of his most sensitive. Brian licked across his nipple and then chewed gently on it. Justin's hand came up to grab a fistful of Brian's hair and his back arched off the bed. He let out a loud gasp.
Brian waited until he settled back down and then went to work on the other nipple, eliciting the same reaction. He looked down to Justin's cock which was red and full and leaking. Brian kissed down Justin's stomach, and then with his mouth he pulled gently at the hair around Justin's cock. When Justin moaned again Brian moved up to his navel and rimmed it thrusting his tongue inside and causing Justin's moans to grow ever louder.
"Jesus, Brian, you're killing me."
"This is just the beginning," Brian grinned as Justin opened his eyes to look in the hazel ones.
Brian shoved himself down so that he could get at Justin's thighs. He pressed the man's legs apart and finding no resistance he kissed up one thigh and down the other. He made sure not to come in contact with Justin's cock. Justin whimpered.
Brian spread Justin's legs farther and pushed them up so he could lie between them. He took one of Justin's balls into his mouth sucking and rolling it around. When he released it, he immediately started working on the other one. Justin's whimpers increased in volume and he panted as he felt the tingles of orgasm course through his body.
Brian waited for Justin to calm again and then proceeded to lick along the perineum. He nuzzled and sniffed and kissed the sensitive area.
"Brian," Justin cried out. "I'm going to come."
"Not yet," Brian said sticking two fingers in behind Justin's balls. Justin felt the urge to shoot immediately dissipate. He took a couple of deep breaths.
"God, Brian. I don't know how much more I can take. You're driving me insane."
"That was my intention," Brian smirked.
"Asshole," Justin grumped.
Brian chuckled and then sucked Justin's cock into his mouth just holding it there as Justin gasped and thrashed around beneath him. Slowly he worked his mouth up and down the shaft spreading precum and saliva. He could feel Justin thrusting into his mouth and knew he couldn't prolong this much longer. He swirled his tongue around the tip of the cock and sucked hard once or twice. He shifted so he could reach Justin's ass more easily and he squeezed the globes.
Justin moaned, "Brian, oh God, Brian."
Brian did three things in quick succession. He sucked Justin's cock into his mouth down to the hilt. He shoved his middle finger up Justin's ass, and then he swallowed around the cock halfway down his throat. Justin rose off the bed with an almighty groan and shot his load down Brian's throat. Brian swallowed it all, sucking every drop, until Justin sighed and flopped back exhausted on the bed.
Brian pulled himself up the bed till he was lying next to Justin. He rolled the lithe body towards him holding him tenderly against his chest. He could feel Justin's heart pounding against his own and he ran his hand up and down Justin's back until he felt the man's breathing slow to near normal.
"Did that show you how much I missed you?" Brian whispered.
"I don't think I could stand any more graphic display than that," Justin whispered back. "That was breathtaking."
"I guess I haven't lost my touch after all these years."
"And you've been letting me do all the work," Justin said with a chuckle and a gentle slap to Brian's chest. "If I had known you could do that, I would have let you do everything."
"I don't do that for just anybody."
"Only very grumpy, but special friends."
"Friends?" Justin asked looking into Brian's eyes.
"Lovers," Brian admitted.
"Singular, please," Justin said.
"Christ, you're demanding."
"Yep, get used to it."
"I'd love to," Brian admitted slowly.
They held on to each other for a few minutes. "Do you want to stay here tonight?" Justin asked.
"I'd like to, but the bathroom is a problem. I probably should go home."
"I'll come with you, but I think I'll go home later on, like I used to."
"I've been wanting to talk to you about that."
"You know I have, so listen." Justin nodded and kept his mouth shut. He hoped this was going to be the speech he wanted to hear. "I like sleeping with you, and I do mean sleeping, not just the other stuff we do." Justin grinned. This was good. "Neither my loft nor yours is really suitable since we have such different needs and work schedules. Am I right?" Justin nodded again. This was going in a very good direction. "So I was thinking that we could sell these places and find something together." Brian waited. Justin smiled and said nothing. "So what do you think?"
"I think I like the way you think," Justin grinned. "What should we get, a bigger apartment or a house? What part of town do you want to be in? How much can we afford to spend? Do you want ?"
"Whoa, slow the fuck down," Brian said. "We don't have to decide everything right now."
"I know, but I love the idea, and I thought we should get right on it before you changed your mind."
"What makes you think I'm going to change my mind?" Brian asked with a frown.
"Weeeelllll " Justin said. He let the word dangle. He was very happy about Brian's suggestion and he didn't want to ruin the moment, but there was something else he wanted to discuss with Brian.
Brian heaved a huge sigh. "Tell me," he ordered.
Justin was about to bring up the subject when he thought better of it. Now was definitely not the right time. He wanted to bask in the glow of Brian wanting them to live together. That was more than enough for now.
"I was thinking that I could get my mother to look for a place for us," Justin suggested.
"Your mother? Why the fuck would you want to do that?" Brian asked.
"Because she's a realtor."
"You never told me that," Brian said rather sheepishly. He had almost met Justin's mother at the art gallery when Justin's show opened, but she had made a hasty trip out of town to help a sick aunt, and so their paths had never crossed.
"Well, duh! Did you think I was going to get my mommy's suggestions before I could choose a place?"
"I've never met your mother. In fact I hardly knew you had one."
"Everybody has a mother, Brian," Justin said in that 'I'm educating the great unwashed' voice of his. "Don't you?"
"Not so's you'd notice."
"What do you mean?" Justin asked with a frown.
"Debbie Novotny was much more of a mother to me than my own fucking mother ever was. My father called her the warden. She was/is cold, unfeeling and disgustingly religious. She gives the term mother a very bad name."
"I'm sorry," Justin said staring into Brian's eyes. He knew Brian had had a rough childhood, but the way he described his mother was scary.
"It's in the past. Let's leave it there."
"So can I ask my mother to start looking for places for us?"
"Yee haw," Justin crowed. "I can hardly wait."
"Who would think that the prospects of a good night's sleep could get you so excited?"
"It's not the sleep. It's that you asked me to live with you, that we're going to be together permanently. That is what you meant, isn't it?"
"I guess you could interpret it that way," Brian said with a smirk.
"Asshole," Justin reacted pushing his obnoxious lover away.
"Take it easy, pushy puss."
"You're PP, I'm BB. Remember," Justin said with a chuckle.
"Okay then, Bossy Butt. Let's go up to my place and discuss what kind of living arrangements we should have."
"That's the best idea you've had since you suggested living together."
"It may be the best idea I've ever had," Brian said as he maneuvered himself into his chair.
Justin beamed at him from the other side of the bed as he started to put on his clothes. Things were really looking up.
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