Scattered Ashes

Part five

A/N 2: It is a well known fact that I love GNR and the songs that are included in this chapter are very important to me. November Rain is, as strange as it may seem, "our  song" for my husband and me. It seems to perfectly sum up our relationship. In every life a little rain must fall, its what you do after the storm that counts. And as the line says never mind the darkness .....nothing lasts forever even cold November Rain. And in love darkness and heartache only last for so long until love springs new again. And if you're lucky enough that love comes from the greatest love of your life, the one person who after all those years still makes your heart skip a beat and you eyes sparkle.

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Brian watched as Justin tore out of the club and waited a few minutes before leaving himself. He hadn't seen him in weeks and with just one glance he knew that he had to comfort him somehow. He knew instinctivly where Justin would head and pulled the Corvette out of its space and made the right turn onto Tremont. Pulling up in front of his old building he felt the emptiness and pain take hold of his heart again knowing that just up those stairs stood his past, a past he had thrown away and might never get back.



Setting the alarm on the car he punched in the security code and took the stairs wanting to get to Justin as quickly as possible. He heard the music by the time he hit the fourth floor and knew that Justin was on the edge.



Brian stood just outside the door listening to the final strains of 'Novemeber Rain' by Guns N Roses. Justin had had a mad crush on Axl Rose for years and this had become the song he listened to most after the bashing. The words hit home for both of them and he found himself standing in the hallway outside of the home he once shared with Justin crying.



Brian pulled the door open and found his lover sitting on the floor with his head in his lap crying. He could handle anything but Justin crying tonight. For one night he had to give him hope, something to hold on to.



Crossing the room he skipped the CD  back to track 4 on the CD player and the first strains of 'Don't Cry' brought Justin's eyes up to his. As the words began to fill the loft Brian pulled Justin to his feet and held him close, trying to chase the pain away.

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Talk to me softly
There's something in your eyes
Don't hang your head in sorrow
And please don't cry
I know how you feel inside
I've been there before
Somethin's changin' inside you baby
And don't you know

Don't you cry tonight
I still love you
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight

Give me a whisper
And give me a sigh
Give me a kiss before you tell me goodbye
Don't you take it so hard now
And please don't take it so bad
I'll still be thinking of you
And the times we had ... baby

And don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tomight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight

And please remember that I never lied
And please remember
How I felt inside now honey
You gotta make it your own way
But you'll be alright now sugar
You'll feel better tomorrow
Come the morning light now baby

And don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby

And don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry tonight
Baby maybe someday
Don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry
Tonight

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Justin clung to Brian, clung to the love they once shared and to the hope that someday they would find a way to be together once again. The words tore at his heart and he could see in Brian's eyes that he felt the same. This was their goodbye and neither of them knew for how long.



Brian bent and captured Justin's lips in a kiss, pressing deep into the warm recesses of Justin's mouth. Their tongues danced in unison as they explored the passion they still held. Brian's hands wove themselves through Justin's hair, desperate for something to hold onto.



A low moan escaped Justin and was swallowed by the kiss that neither wanted to break. Justin's hands fumbled with the button of Brian's pants and pulled at the zipper trying to be closer to him.



Brian pulled at the shirt that Justin wore, longing to feel the heat of his skin against his. They broke the kiss long enough to pull of their remaining clothing and then were back together as if the other man was a lifeline.



They sank to the floor, hands caressing bodies, mouths hungrily devouring mouths, bodies pressed tightly together. Brian sought out Justin's cock and stroked him softly, gently adding pressure and speed until the blond beneath him cried out for release. Brian spit into his own hand and lubricated himself enough to press deep inside of his one true love.



They were one again and it felt like heaven to them both. Moving together they each sought comfort and love, giving as much as they recieved. When they both were spent they lay together on the cold hardwood floor trying to catch their breath.



Brian looked over to see a single tear slide down Justin's cheek. Justin pushed himself up from the floor and dressed quietly. Turning to Brian his heart broke as he watched the tears fall from his ex-lover's eyes.



"Always, Brian."



"
Yeah, always, baby."



Justin turned and left his past behind determined to move on with his life.

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Lyrics to November Rain By Guns N Roses

When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain
But lovers always come and lovers always go
An no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time
to lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain

Do you need some time...on your own
Do you need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...
on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you

Sometimes I need some time...on my
own
Sometimes I need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...
on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain

Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one



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