Scattered Ashes
Part three
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Melanie cleaned up JR then put him down for his nap and was just about to catch a nap herself when the doorbell rang. Sighing deeply, she opened it to find Michael standing on the stoop with another toy for their son.
"Michael, you have to stop buying him things. He has enough toys
already."
"But I love him, Mel." He kissed her cheek and headed up the
stairs.
"I just put him down for a nap."
"Ok, I'll just sit and watch him then. You go get some sleep, you look
horrible."
"Thanks so much."
"You're welcome."
"How's Brian?"
"I don't know, I haven't seen him in a while. He
came by a few days after the break up but he talked to Ben. Anthony called
and he hadn't heard from him either."
"Well that's a little strange, don't you think? I mean, he left Justin for
this guy and doesn't even call him. Somethings not right here."
"You have no idea." Both turned to face Lindsay standing in the doorway,
holding a newspaper under her arm.
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"Justin." Emmett had been calling him for a little over ten minutes
now and the man still hadn't woken up. "JUSTIN GET OUT
OF THAT DAMN BED OR I'M COMING IN AND DRAGGING YOU OUT."
"I'm up," Justin said sleepily from beneath the blankets. "What the
fuck is so important that you had to wake me up this fucking
early?"
"Early? Early? It's two
in the fucking afternoon on a Wednesday. That is not early, it's
pathetic."
Justin padded out rubbing his eyes and scratching his stomach. "Give me a
break, Em. I'm going through a traumatic experience."
"Yeah, you haven't been fucked in weeks. Get
your ass in the shower, we're going to the diner then to the park and you
are going to paint and be happy or I'll kill you."
"Can't a person get a little sympathy around here?"
"No. It's been long enough. You've had plenty of time to feel sorry for yourself.
Now it's time to get out there and show Brian Kinney just what he gave
up."
Emmett tossed Justin a pair of pants and shirt and watched him stumble off
to shower. Emmett mumbled to himself as he set about making coffee for his
friend.
"Damn kid. Worse than Teddy. Fucking thinks the
world is going to end just because Brian left. Well fuck Brian Kinney. Ok
not a good idea, but shit he is not the only person that ever wanted to be
with Justin. And tonight that kid is going to fuck Brian right out of his
memory."
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Brian stood and kissed Lindsay on the cheek before they both sat back down
at the best table at Nouveau, the hot new restaurant in town. He took a long
drink of wine before looking at his best friend.
"So how's Anthony?"
"He's good, thanks."
"And how are you?"
"I'm ok. How about you?"
"Fine. Care to tell me why it is you wanted to meet me
today?"
"No reason."
"You never were good at lying to me, Bri. Spill it."
"How is he? "
"Hurt, scared, destroyed. Is that what you wanted to hear, Brian? Does that
make it easier for you?"
Brian fought back the tears that threatened to fall. "Not really."
"Is that regret I see on your face? Could it be that Brian Kinney really
did love someone?"
"Stop it, Lindz. I can't take it. I can't take you telling me how much of
a bastard I am, especially not when I'm doing a good enough job of beating
myself up."
"He loved you, Brian. No, he still loves you. He's hurting so bad. He doesn't
understand why you just left him like that. How could you do that to
him?"
"I ask myself that every second of every day. I loved him too. Hell I still
love him."
"And what about Anthony? Do you love
him?"
"Yes, I do love him. He's a good man."
"But do you love him like you love Justin?"
"I can't answer that, Lindz."
"Why? Are you afraid of the truth? Are you afraid you'll reallize you made
a mistake?"
"It's too late, Lindsay. I've ruined any chance of ever having Justin love
me again."
"He will always love you, Brian. Nothing and no one will ever change that
for either of you. Sooner of later you'll find your way back to one
another."
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"Vic, I can't believe that those two are not together anymore."
"I know sis, it's just not right."
Debbie took another bite of the chocolate cake that Vic had baked the day
before. "They belong together. Poor
Sunshine."
"Does Brian even know what he did to that kid?"
"Yeah he does, Uncle Vic."
Debbie and Vic turned at the sound of Michael's voice and watched him shed
his coat before continuing.
"But does he care, sweetheart?"
"Look, Ma, Brian's hurting too. He loves Justin a lot."
"He brought the hurt on himself again this time. As for
loving Justin, I used to believe that, but I'm not so sure
anymore."
"He told him, Ma."
"What?!?" both Vic and Debbie asked in unison.
"He finally told Justn that he loves him. I never thought I would hear myself
saying this, but, Brian may have made the biggest mistake of his life leaving
Justin. He'll never have that kind of love with Anthony or anyone else. Only
Justin could love Brian the way that he needs to be loved."
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"I wonder what happened?"
"Who stole his heart?"
"Did he ever have a heart?"
Justin did his best to ignore the gossip surrounding him and Brian. He had
tried his best to get out of coming to
Brian wore jeans and a black tee with his Prada boots. To Justin he looked
irresistable. Justin watched him cross the bar and order a beer, taking a
sip of it before making his way back through the crowd towards the backroom.
Without thinking Justin followed and stayed in the shadows watching Brian
study the men around him. As usual they were all vying for a chance to blow
the hottest man on
Brian felt his presence before he even saw him. He looked around, pretending
to observe the men and saw him duck into a dark corner. He hadn't expected
to see Justin. He wasn't sure his heart could handle being this close to
the man without taking him in his arms.