One Fateful Night

Part 1

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The concrete wall was cold against his back, the music pounding in his head, the feel of his dick being sucked was almost too much for Brian. Looking across the room he spotted a pair of blue eyes fixed on him. Pushing the trick away Brian mindlessly wandered toward the blonde in the corner of the club. He was drawn towards him and nothing was stopping him from having him tonight. No one, not even Justin. Taking the blonde by the hand he pulled him toward the backroom and pushed him forcefully against the wall, pulling at his belt as he kissed him. Yanking down his pants Brian dropped to his knees and looked up into the eyes of his very own soul.

"How the fuck am I supposed to make it without you?" was all he could think. His hands wandered to caress the face of his lover as he continued his assault on his dick. Brian felt his own cock growing harder as he felt the younger man's dick quiver. Standing he turned him around and pushed deep into him. He was home, Brian Kinney was right where he belonged. As he leaned in to kiss the younger man his clouded mind realized that the blonde in front of him was definitely not Justin Taylor. He felt his dick soften as he pulled out of the man and stumbled towards the bar with his pants still unfastened. As he reached the bar everything started to spin and Brian Kinney fell into the arms of one very surprised man.

Brian woke up the next morning with one hell of a headache and couldn't remember anything but those blue eyes staring at him from across the room. It was as though he saw into his own heart. Padding across the cold floor barefoot, Brian grabbed the almost empty bottle of Beam and fell on the couch for his morning cigarette. Realizing he was nearly out of booze and cigarettes he grabbed the keys to the jeep and opened the door to find Lindsay standing there.

"What the fuck do you want?" he asked turning back towards the kitchen.

"I want to know what the fuck you think you're doing Brian?"

"I'm getting laid. Just like you all think I do. Why the fuck do you care? You have Gus and Melanie. What the fuck do I have? Oh yeah I have Jim, here, or I will as soon as I get to the store and get more of him."

"Brian, you have a problem and you need help. This isn't going to help you get Justin back."

"Fuck Justin. Now get the fuck out of my loft Lindsay. I don't need a lecture. I need a fucking drink," Brian seethed.

"Grow up Brian. Justin loved you and you couldn't admit that you loved him. And to top it off you let him walk out without ever telling him. Now get off your ass and sober up and go get him back, before it is too late," Lindsay slammed the door shut as she left.

Brian sat staring at the door for what seemed hours before he got up and headed for the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he grabbed a bump and a beer. Searching for his keys he headed out the door towards the elevator. When he reached his jeep he looked over and saw the blue Honda parked across the street and his heart started to race as the blonde got out and crossed the street.

"Brian," Justin smiled that devastating smile that left Brian weak.

"What do you want, Justin? Did you come here to tell me I'm a drunk too?" Brian was fuming.

"No Brian, I came to get the rest of my stuff. I couldn't care less if you drink yourself to death. It's your life and nothing I ever wanted mattered to you anyway. So just keep fucking your tricks and trying not to feel anything. It's what you do best. Now can I get my stuff or not?"

"It isn't here. I took it all to Debbie's. I thought she would have called you and told you. Or maybe she doesn't have the number to your violin player's place," Brian spat.

"Not that it's any of your business but I'm not with Ethan. I'm at the dorms. I've applied for a scholarship, which Lindsay says I have a good shot at getting it. Then you can finally be completely free of me Brian." Justin was holding back the tears as he looked away from his former lover.

"What do you mean you're applying for a scholarship? I told you that I'd lend you the money and that hasn't changed. I believe in your talent Justin. So you will take the money and finish school. No arguments. Now if you'll excuse me I have to be somewhere before they close." Brian opened the door and started to get into the jeep when Justin grabbed the keys from him.

"Not in your condition, you won't. Brian you could kill someone, and not only yourself. Move over, I'll drive you. Where to?" Justin said sliding into the driver's seat with getting no objections from Brian.

"To the liquor store then, Sonny Boy. Then back to the loft to have a drink with me, and don't say no."

After buying a half gallon of Jim Beam they headed back to the loft to have that drink. Before Justin knew it he was as drunk as Brian. Stumbling up the stairs to the bathroom Justin found himself in the bedroom. His heart raced as he felt Brian's arms wrap around him. A soft kiss on his neck, hands caressing his body, was all it took for Justin to give in to his desire for Brian Kinney. There was nothing he wouldn't do for Brian.

Brian carried him to the bed and released him, covering his body with his own. Justin's hard cock pressing against his stomach was all it took for Brian to lose control. He kissed the younger man hard and ripped his shirt open to feel his skin on his hands. He lowered his lips to cover a taunt nipple and lightly sucked on it, flicking his tongue roughly over it. His hands entwined in Justin's hair as he heard the deep moan escape his lover's throat. His own cock grew harder as he ground his hips against Justin. Brian reached up and pulled his lover hands above his head and held them there. He began his slow descent to Justin's waist. Pulling the blonde's pants down Brian stopped and marveled at how big he was. His cock was perfect, thick, and long. He loved the taste of Justin more than anything.  His mouth enveloped his cock as he slowly ran his tongue up and down the shaft stopping briefly to flick his tongue over the head, tasting the pre-cum that was already there. He tasted salty and sweet, just as Brian remembered. He listened for the rapid breathing and moans that would tell him that Justin was at the point of no return. As he felt Justin's cock down his throat, he heard the sharp intake of breath that told him that now was the time to move.

Brian released his lover's arms and rolled them over until Justin was on top of him. His cock pressing against Justin told the younger man how much he wanted him. Without a word Brian turned over and allowed Justin entrance. Feeling Justin's tongue slowly licking around his pucker made Brian almost cum. He gasped as Justin's wet tongue entered him over and over. Justin's fingers replaced his tongue until he was sure that Brian was ready. Grabbing the lube and a condom, he prepared himself for what was to come. Slowly pressing the head of his cock into Brian he held his breath until he heard him beg to continue. Justin pushed in all the way and began to thrust deep inside his lover. He felt Brian's breath quicken as he pressed against his prostate. Reaching around to take his lover's cock in his hand Justin matched his strokes with his thrusts. Feeling Brian's dick tighten he knew that it was only a matter of moments before they both came. Quickening his pace Justin thrust deeper into Brian more than he ever remembered. When he felt Brian's cum on his hand he finally allowed himself the same release.

"Oh. God. Justin. Justin. UH. UH. Justin I love you. I love you Justin. I love you," Brian panted before finally succumbing to the darkness the alcohol had brought with it.

Justin lay there catching his breath, holding his lover. At first he didn't think he had actually heard it. But as he lay there he knew it was real, he also knew that it changed nothing. Brian still couldn't tell him he loved him when he was sober. Without that he had nothing. Justin gathered his things and quietly left the loft and Brian.

Brian woke the next morning with a hangover from hell. It was all he could do just to sit up without throwing up. He tried to remember what happened the night before but all he could remember was Justin being there. He searched his alcohol clouded mind for answers to what happened but to no avail. Looking around the room he noticed that the sheets were twisted and he was naked, that was nothing new on a Saturday morning. Getting up and heading to the bathroom he looked for some sign of who had been in his bed. Seeing no one around the loft he laid back down in the bed and closed his eyes. Taking a deep breath he caught the scent of Justin's cologne on his pillow. It dawned on him that Justin must have been in his bed sometime the night before. But where was he now? And just what had happened?

Justin sat at the window and watched the rain falling, thinking of the night before and Brian. Why did he let Brian have this hold over him? 'Why can't I just get over him and move on?' he thought to himself. 'Because I love him that's why, and nothing will ever change that.'

"Justin?" Jennifer called out to her son. "Honey, where are you? Lindsay is on the phone, she wants to know if you can watch Gus for her for a few hours tonight. What should I tell her?"

"I'm down here mom. Tell her yes and find out what time. I have nothing to do tonight."

Justin got ready and was at Lindsay and Mel's in plenty of time for them to make the ballet.

"Justin, thank you so much," Melanie said kissing him on the cheek. "Our babysitter got sick and I thought we weren't able to go. This means a lot to Lindsay, and to me."

"No problem Mel, I love watching Gus. Besides I had nothing to do tonight."

"A hot little fuck like you with nothing to do? What has this world come to?" Lindsay teased as she finished kissing Gus goodbye. "Just make sure he's in bed by eight. Help yourself to anything in the fridge. We'll be back by midnight. Thank you Justin," Lindsay kissed his cheek and shut the door behind them.

Justin spent the evening playing bowling with Gus. After feeding him spaghetti o's and milk for dinner, Justin put the little boy to bed. He sat in the rocking chair in the corner and started to sketch the sleeping child. He was so lost in his sketching that he did not hear Brian let himself in.

"LINDSAY. LINDSAY WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?"

Brian took the stairs two at a time, searching for his son in a drunken stupor. He pushed open Gus' door and found Justin sitting there. "What the fuck are you doing here with MY son?"

"I'm babysitting. What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to see my son." He moved to wake Gus and Justin jumped in front of him.

"You are not waking him. He just went to sleep. Come on Bri, let's go downstairs and get you some coffee."

"I don't want any coffee," Brian protested but allowed himself to be led downstairs. Justin sat him down on the couch and went to make coffee.

"How did you get here Brian?" he called from the kitchen.

"I drove."

"I was afraid of that. Here take this," Justin handed him a cup of black coffee. "Brian you can't just barge in here and expect Gus to be up. It's late. Maybe you should stay here until Lindsay gets back, then I'll take you home."

"I don't need you to take me home. I can take care of myself," Brian stood spilling coffee down the front of his shirt. "Fuck," he muttered.

"Yeah, sure you can. Sit down Brian. What do you think you're doing? You're going to kill yourself if you keep drinking like this."

"Who would care? They all think I'm just a heartless prick anyway, you included."

"I don't think you're heartless, Brian just messed up. If you would just let yourself be loved maybe things would be different."

"Don't you dare tell me how to live my life. You walked out on me for that fucking violinist. Is he good? Does he fuck you as good as I do? Does he make you moan and cum?"

"I don't have to listen to this Brian. You know, you pushed me out that fucking door. As for my relationship with Ethan, that's none of your business."

"It is my business Sunshine. I taught you how to fuck. How to take it like a man. Don't tell me you let him fuck you."

"No one fucks me Bri."

"I did."

"You're different."

"How?"

"I loved you."

"You don't know anything about love Justin. To you love is something good and sweet. To me love is pain and hurt, love fucking sucks."

"You're wrong Brian. Love is good. You're the one who doesn't know anything about love."

"I know all about love. I know that my dad hit me everyday and then tried to make it right by saying he loved me. My mother just watched, yet now the bitch thinks I should love her for it. Fuck Love. Love is overrated."

"I'm sorry you feel that way. But I will always believe in love, maybe someday you will too."

"Don't count on it."

"I've learned not to count on you for anything Brian," Justin stood and walked away from him. Brian stumbled to his feet and grabbed Justin's arm.

"Don't you fucking walk away from me Sonny Boy. Stay here and be a man." Brian tripped and fell, knocking them both to the floor, as he fell Justin hit his head on the wall. They were still on the floor when Lindsay and Melanie arrived home.

"Justin. Oh my god Brian what did you do him?" Melanie screamed as Lindsay checked on Brian. Melanie grabbed the phone and dialed 911 as she held a kitchen towel to Justin's head.

"Brian. Brian. BRIAN!" Lindsay screamed at the man on the floor. His eyes opened slowly and he grimaced against the pain that gripped him.

"FUCK."

"Brian what happened? Did you do that to Justin?"

"Do what to Justin?"

Lindsay grabbed his head and turned him to look at Justin lying on the floor. "Look at him Brian. What the hell happened?"

"I don't know. Last thing I remember was spilling coffee on my shirt."

"How much have you had to drink tonight?"

"A lot."

"Fuck. Get up, the ambulance is on it's way here for Justin and if they find you here drunk like this you could be charged with assault. Come on let's get you upstairs," Lindsay said pulling him to his feet. Brian walked unsteadily up the stairs and fell onto the bed and gave into the darkness. Lindsay ran back downstairs to help Melanie with Justin.

"You should have let him go to jail. Maybe then he would stop this destructive behavior."

"He's hurting Mel, just give him a chance."

"I'm so sick of you always defending him. Look at him. He's a fucking wreck. He is going to destroy everyone that loves him. Look at Justin, he's finally wised up and left the asshole and now look at him."

"Justin will be fine, Mel."

"How can you say that when you see him lying here in a pool of blood. He almost died a year ago and that was Brian's fault as well."

Justin came to just in time to hear the women arguing about Brian. Groaning against the pain he struggled to sit up, "It wasn't Brian's fault Melanie."

"Fuck now you're defending him too. Justin you could have died."

"But I didn't, this is not Brian's fault. He fell and it just so happened that I was next to him. Don't blame him for this. It's my fault, I pulled away from him and he tripped over Gus' bowling pins."

"I can't believe you. You're sitting here with blood streaming down your face, and you're still defending the bastard. What the fuck is wrong with you Justin?  Why can't you just get over him and get the fuck away from him before he kills you?"

"Could you just walk away from Lindsay?"

"No."

"Well then you understand why I can't just leave him. I love him Melanie. I always will, no matter what."

Justin was cut off by the arrival of rescue personnel. They checked Justin over thoroughly and advising them that he should be transported to the hospital for stitches and observation. Lindsay said she would drive him over and Justin thanked her.

On the drive to the hospital Lindsay tried to figure out just what was going on between the two men. Justin explained what took place the night before and how Brian seemed not to remember any of it. Lindsay shook her head and reminded Justin that he was drinking heavily and that he didn't mean to hurt Justin.

"I know that Lindsay, but he told me he loved me. Now he's forgotten all about it. AGAIN."

"What do you mean again?"

"The first night we were together, the night you had Gus, he told me he loved me then."

"Oh honey. I'm sure he meant it. It's just that love is hard for Brian. He didn't have the best home life growing up. To him love is something everyone else gets to have. He feels he isn't deserving of love. Gus is the only one Brian has shown any signs of loving."

"That's just it Lindz, he tells me he loves me in all of his actions, so why isn't that enough for me? Why do I have to hear him say it?"

"Because you love him and you want him to proclaim his love for you publicly, just once."

"I guess. All I know is that I love him. I'm miserable without him and I'm even more miserable with him lately. I just want him to love me Lindsay."

"He does honey. Look at everything he's done for you. He's paying for your school, he bought you that computer so you could draw again. He kept you from dropping out of school after the bashing. He just hasn't realized how much he loves you yet."

"I just don't know if I can wait for him to realize it. I need it now."

"Don't give up on him just yet."

Justin was sitting in the exam room getting the last of his stitches when Brian walked in. He walked over and sat next to Justin, holding his hand as the doctor finished the last stitch. Waiting until the doctor had left to speak, Brian held onto Justin.

"I'm sorry. Melanie bitched me out for hurting you again. Did I really do that to you?"

"It wasn't your fault. I shouldn't have pulled away so hard. It's not as bad as it looks."

"How many stitches?"

"Twelve. Not as many as when I got hit in the head by the bat so you're ok." Seeing Brian's eyes darken, Justin quickly covered, "Sorry, I just meant it isn't as bad. I'll be fine."

"Well come on Lindsay's waiting to take us home. She says we're both staying on the couch tonight and I don't think she's gonna take no for an answer." Brian took Justin's hand and they walked out of the exam room together. Justin turned to Brian and asked "Did you mean it?"

"Mean what Sunshine?"

"When you said you could never love me?"

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