I Want You to Know

Part 67

 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I sat on the plane with Carrie shooting me questioning looks for the many hours it took to get home to the Pitts. Dad slept soundly in the seat between us completely unaware that we were taking him home. Closing my eyes I tried to imagine what it would be like for him when he saw Sascha still alive?

 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I had tried Brian's cell for the hundredth time that day with no luck. His assistant at the Sony offices had not seen him all day and I was starting to believe he had been abducted by aliens or something just as awful. I felt a drama queen moment beginning and automatically dialed Lindsay.

An hour later we sat in the hospital cafeteria while Julie sat upstairs with Sascha.

"Justin, what's wrong?"

"I can't find Brian. I've tried his cell and his office and no one has seen him in days."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

His voice was full of fear and sadness and it broke my heart. Sometimes Brian Kinney could be selfish and an asshole. Justin had always somehow managed to overlook those traits. It still shocked me that Brian had remained faithful to Justin all these years. I guess he finally grew up and became the man he never wanted to be. I let my mind wander back to when I first met him in college.

I was a freshman and so was he. We lived in the same dorm and I will never forget the day he walked in the door and bumped into me. That was the day my life changed forever.

I was late for Chem again and wasn't paying attention to what I was doing when suddenly I felt these strong arms around me. I looked up into the most beautiful face I had ever seen and instantly fell in love. I felt my face heat up and knew I was blushing.

"Sorry," was all he said and it was enough for me to know I wanted to hear that voice everyday for the rest of my life.

"Oh, it's ok. It was my fault. I wasn't paying attention again. I'm such a blonde someday."

He laughed at that and I felt my heart soar. He was the dreamiest man I had ever met.

"That's cute. I'm Brian."

I took the hand he offered and sparks flew when we touched. He felt it too. I could tell by the shocked look on his face.

"Lindsay Peterson." I looked down at my watch and saw I was already half an hour late for Chem class and decided to just skip it. Before I could stop myself I asked him out for coffee. "Well I'm not going to make it to class now so how about we go get some coffee instead?"

He flashed me that smile that would make me weak in the knees for the rest of my life and I was smitten. Taking my book he led the way to the coffee shop across the street from the college.

Justin's voice brought me back to the present, "Linds, are you ok?"

"Sorry, I was just lost in the past for a second."

"Brian?"

"Yeah. Listen honey, don't worry about Brian. He'll be ok. He always is."

His sad smile made me rethink my words. Kissing my cheek he took his tray and emptied it in the trash and headed for the elevators. Alone again, I sipped my latte and let myself go back to that fateful day I met the best friend I would ever have.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Justin took Julie's place beside Sascha's bed completely unaware that in just a few short hours his partner would be home. He sat holding her hand thinking about Brian. All the while Brian was sleeping peacefully on a plane headed straight for Pittsburgh.

Thea watched Carrie as she slept and thought about how much she longed to tell the beautiful girl how she felt about her. She had her suspicions that Carrie would welcome any attention that she would give. She just didn't want to lose the one person who always made her smile.

Carrie sat back in her seat; eyes closed and imagined what it would be like to be kissed by Thea Kinney. Her heart raced at the thought and she absentmindedly licked her lips causing Thea's heart to pound. In her dreams she was the person that Thea loved and desired. If only she could make that a reality she would have everything she ever wanted.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sitting across from him in that coffee shop sipping an espresso, I was fully aware of him. My hands were sweaty, my heart beat rapidly, and I was filled with a desire I had never felt before. I had known since I was young that I liked girls. There was something about Brian Kinney that made me want to make love to him though. I wanted to feel his strong arms around me as he thrust deep inside of me; taking me to the heights I had only reached alone.

I had been with other men. I had never acted on my feelings for women because I was afraid of what that would make me. No man had ever made me cum. That only happened when I masturbated, which was often. I had a collection of sex toys that I kept hidden until my date was gone, then I pulled out a vibrator and got myself off. My fantasies up until the day I met Brian had always been about women.

We sat in silence for a while, just watching the people come and go. I noticed immediately how he reacted to the men in the room and pretty much ignored the women. Just my luck, I find a man that makes me hot and he's a fag. I couldn't get it right to save my fucking life.

"So tell me Lindsay, what do you want out of life?"

His voice startled me out of my daydream about us together. "The same thing most people want, a home, a family, and a good career."

"Not everyone wants those things."

"So what do you want?"

"Sex."

"That's all?"

"Isn't that enough?"

"What about love?"

"I don't believe in love."

"Don't believe in love? Are you crazy? Love is spectacular. Not that I've ever been in love but still, how can you not believe in love?"

"I believe in fucking. It's honest, efficient, and you get in and out with a minimum of bullshit and a maximum of pleasure."

That was the first of many times I would hear that lie cross his lips. Honestly it wasn't a lie until he met Justin Taylor.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Justin was sleeping with his head on the side of Sascha's bed when Thea pushed the door open and waited for her dad to make his entrance. Brian crossed the room and put a hand on his partner's back and waited for him to wake up.

Justin's eyes opened and he smiled when he realized that Brian was not a dream. Instantly he was in his lover's arms, asking a thousand questions through his tears.

It took Brian a moment to comprehend that Sascha was not dead. Pushing Justin away he fell to his knees next to his daughter's bed and thanked God for sparing her life. Justin and Thea watched in tearful silence, both thankful that Brian was home. Home was where he belonged.

Return to I Want You to Know