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Finale

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"Justin, it was fine. We talked and he's agreed to back off. He knows that we're together and it's not a problem."

"Why the fuck would he just give up after wanting you for like fifteen years or something? It just doesn't make sense."

Yeah, no shit. "Because he knows I'm not interested. Justin, give it a rest. Has the fucking snow stopped yet?"

"Just about but they're still saying that it will be at least a day before they get the place plowed, even the main roads. Everyone is supposed to stay in if they don't have to go out."

"Are you OK? You have heat and food?"

"We're fine. We have enough wood to last at least a week and plenty of stuff in the kitchen. Don't worry about us."

"…If you say so."

"Brian? Are you really alright out there?"

He laughed, but kindly. "Have you even known me when I wasn't?"

Well, yes. "Stupid me, of course."

"Justin? Hold on a second. Yes?" Keith appeared in the doorway, Brian looked over at him to see what he wanted.

"…Bri? Sorry to interrupt, but a friend of mine is headed east as soon as the airports reopen tomorrow and he said that you could hitch a ride on his Lear if you want. He said he could drop you in Pittsburgh."

"That would be great—sure. Thanks." Nodding, Keith left to finish his own call. "I have a ride home with some guy on his jet tomorrow. I'll call you when I know more."

"Hey, that's fabulous. I'll pick you up. Let me know when."

"I will. Later."

"…Later…hey, Brian? Are you sure…?" The dial tone came on the line; he'd already hung up.

"Justin? Is everything alright?" Jennifer knew that, obviously, it wasn't.

"…I think I'm losing Brian."

Jennifer saw the look on her son's face, shattered and closed to tears. He did tend to be dramatic, but still. "…Sweetheart…did he say something?" The bastard.

Justin turned and knelt by the fireplace, putting a couple more logs on the already blazing fire.

"There's this man out there, Keith. He's the CEO of the company Brian went out to deal with, he's the man who gave Vanguard their account." He stopped, using the tongs to place the logs.

"Did Brian say something about this man to make you think that he wants to…"

"At first he just told me that he was the company president, then he told me that Keith is this guy he knew back in high school and then, later he told me that he was Brian's first boyfriend and that they'd been completely in love before they broke up."

Oh, dear Lord, what was Brian up to this time? "But honey, they broke up years ago. You said so yourself. They should be able to work together, especially if this other man is based on the West Coast."

Justin looked up at her; kneeling there he looked like he had when he was still a little kid. "No, you don't understand. Brian told me that this guy still wants him and that he's using the account with Vanguard as a way to keep in contact with Brian. That's why he had to go out there, because Keith wanted to see if they could get back together."

Why, in the name of God, would Brian be stupid enough to tell Justin that, even if it were true? Where was that man's brain? "…Well, does Brian want to renew his relationship with this man?" The asshole.

"No, he called to tell me that this Keith had made a pass at him and that he'd turned it down. He said that he was worried about me and that he wanted to make sure that I was alright."

While he was sticking knives in his back. Christ, Brian.

"Justin, sweetie, you know that Brian loves you and you said that he's coming home as soon as he can." He was looking at the fire. "If he was interested in this other man he wouldn't be calling you, now, would he? He probably needed to touch base with you, that's all. Did he say when he'd be back?"

His eyes still on the flames, Justin answered, "He said that someone had offered him a ride in his jet and that he'll be back as soon as the airports open—tomorrow, I guess. He said that he'd call when he knew for sure."

Jen moved closer, putting her hand on the top of his head, running her fingers through the long hair. Her's used to be that color when she was younger. "Brian loves you, Justin, you know that."

His voice was low. "But what if he slept with him?"

"What if he did? This is Brian you're talking about."

He gave her a dirty look. "Mom, come on, you know what I mean…and I looked Keith up on the Internet—Mom, he's exactly like Brian. They're so alike that they could be fucking brothers. They even almost look alike, except that Keith is blond." He smiled a little. "Brian likes blonds."

She gave him a small smile—at least he was trying. "How are they alike?"

"Keith is tall and handsome and smart. He's successful and he's, he's just—shit he's who Brian should be with, not some dumbass college kid."

There it was. "That's Brian's choice, honey and it seems like he's made his decision."

She was about to leave when he stopped her. "But wouldn't you be happier if Brian was with someone else?"

Well, yes, she probably would be. "I want you to be happy, Justin, and right now that's Brian." She walked up the stairs to her room, closing the door behind her and picked up the phone.

"Debbie? It's Jennifer…We're fine here, are you alright?…Oh, good, I was worried about you…Yes, it's pretty much stopped here, too…I wanted to ask you something…You knew Brian when he was in high school, didn't you?…I thought so. Do you remember him ever dating a boy back then named Keith?…Keith White, I think…You do? What do you know about it?…It was pretty serious and then they broke up?…And that was when Brian closed down emotionally…I see…So he might have really loved this other boy, this Keith. I see…Well, yes, I guess that he would have been an escape from his family for Brian and then to lose that…It seems that he's a client of Brian's now and that's who Brian is seeing out in California…Of course….Yes, He called Justin just a little while ago. He said something about maybe getting back tomorrow if the airports are open then…Yes, we will. Thank you…Be safe."

Debbie had known the story.

Brian had sobbed it out to her one night that summer when he couldn't understand why Keith had shut him out so completely. They had sat on her old couch, her arms around him while he cried and swore that one way or another, he'd get Keith back. After more than two hours of tears and unanswerable questions, Brian had simply stopped—seemingly having come to some kind of decision. He had taken a deep breath and straightened himself up. Then he washed his face, thanked her, apologized for being a bother and walked home. That was the last display of emotion she ever saw from Brian. From that evening on his walls were in place and for fifteen years nothing and no one—until Justin—got through.

And now this man, this Keith wanted him back and was willing to spend millions of advertising dollars to make sure that he and Brian would have to be in contact.

My poor Justin.

He's still a baby.

He may be a college student and he may have had lovers and been attacked so badly that he almost died, but part of him is still so straightforward and open that if he were to lose Brian after all they've been through—after Justin realized how much he loves that son of a bitch—he'd end up with his sweet heart broken as badly as Brian's was all those years ago.

That night Jenn went down to the living room about one in the morning to make sure that the screen was in front if the fire, worried about sparks.

Justin was there, awake, drawing by firelight. He glanced at her when he heard her walk across the room. He was drawing a picture of Brian, which was no surprise, but this one was different than the others. In this sketch was a younger Brian, as he would likely have looked as a teenager. The features were more open, less guarded. He looked—softer, less wary, less ready to deflect pain than the modern Brian appeared. He looked, well, he looked nicer.

"I love him, Mom."

"I know you do."

"You still don't like him do you?"

No, not really. "There are things about him that I like very much. The way he helped you after you were hurt, the way he takes care of Gus, I admire his honesty and how he is always there for his friends."

He smiled. "Mom, you're so full of shit."

"OK. I also think he's too old for you and that you may end up hurt." She softened her voice and her expression. "I do believe he loves you, though." She kissed him on the cheek. "Don't stay up all night."

The call came in to Justin's cel after lunch. The snow had stopped completely during the night and the day was bright and clear. The plows were out and he and Molly had shoveled off the walk and the driveway. The jeep was dug out.

"Justin? I'm at the airport. We're about to leave. I should be in Pittsburgh by around seven tonight. Can you meet me or should I get a cab?"

"I think I can get you, just tell me the terminal and all of that." Brian gave him the information; the call was a short one. He couldn't get any emotional reading at all.

Shit.

He drove the jeep to the terminal for private planes, it was smaller than the main buildings and the cars in the parking lot were Landrovers, Beemers and Mercedes and the like. He parked close to the door; there weren't many planes today.

Walking inside he looked around, asking someone if the Microsoft jet was there yet.

Yes, it was, it was just taxiing in now, it would only be a couple of minutes.

Looking out the windows, he saw Brian standing in the door of the small plane. He was carrying his suit bag and leather duffle he'd taken with him. He stopped, so that he could turn and thank the man who had given him the ride home, shaking his hand then walking down the half dozen steps to the frozen ground. The plane's door closed behind him and started away to continue up to Boston.

"Justin." He spotted the young man almost immediately and his smile was genuine, if tired. Putting his luggage on a counter, he held his arms open for Justin to walk into.

Both the embrace and the kiss heartfelt for both of them, Justin clinging to Brian's neck, pressing himself as close as he could and holding on. He could feel the stiffness in Brian's back and in the way he held himself.

Shit. He was—he was holding himself together with his Goddamned willpower again. He was behind all his fucking walls, just like he used to be.

Gently removing Justin's arms from around himself, he said quietly so that just they could hear, "Let's go home." Obviously exhausted by the last few days, all Brian wanted was dinner and to sleep in his own bed—preferably with Justin.

The ride back to the loft was slow, the roads slippery and not all lanes were opened as they tried to get back to the city proper. They didn't talk much beyond pleasantries, something Brian wasn't big on in the best of circumstances.

"Is your mother alright if you're not there or do you want me to drop you off at her place?"

"…The power came back on this afternoon, she's fine. I mean unless you'd rather be alone."

"No. I think that…" He trailed off.

Shit, this is it, this is where he tells me that he's decided to get back together with fucking Keith and pack up the loft and live in Goddamned California. "What?"

"Nothing, I'm just tired. There probably isn't any food at the loft, is there?"

"Not really, no."

"We can get something."

"I can go out when we get back if you're tired. I don't mind."

"Either way."

They arrived back at the old warehouse, let themselves in. It was chilly in the loft. The power had been off for a couple of days with the storm and had just come back on a little while ago, as far as they could tell. The clocks were all blinking, the few things in the fridge ruined. The hot water was barely tepid.

Brian looked like he was about to just say `fuck it' and head out to the nearest hotel before Justin stopped him.

"It's OK, I'll take care of it."

"Fuck that." Brian dug a couple of space heaters out of a closet and called the Chinese place for dinner. He carried his bags up to the bedroom and sorted things into laundry and dry cleaning then rummaged to see what he could find to drink. He came up with a half bottle of Beam.

They seemed to be just about out of that, too.

Fuck.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"Yeah. I am, but not right now. Give me a few minutes, OK?"

Brian went back upstairs to use the bathroom, shutting the door behind him as Justin imagined the hickeys he probably had on his chest and shoulders.

Goddamnit.

He was sitting on the couch, a cashmere thrown around him against the cold when Brian finally can back, bottle and glass in hand and sat beside him.

"Did you fuck him or did he fuck you?" He was sitting stiffly, waiting to hear what had happened, just how bad it was.

"No one fucked."

Justin shook his head and smiled slightly in sarcastic disbelief. "Right."

"That's the truth."

"Why didn't you?"

"I told you on the phone—I want you."

Justin just looked out the window. "Come on, Brian, cut the shit and just tell me, OK?"

Brian leaned back against the arm of the couch, evidently deciding how much of the story to tell. "I did tell you most of it. Keith and I met in high school, we were a couple my freshman year then we broke up—OK he dumped me. About two months ago he showed up in my office as a new client and made it clear that he wanted to get back together…"

"And you didn't tell me."

"What would have been the point? I wasn't interested and you would have been upset about nothing." Justin exhaled in exasperation but didn't say anything. "So Keith managed to have Vance fly me out there to baby-sit the account this week—he made a pass at me which I turned down. I still have the account and will run it from here. That's about it."

"He made a pass at you?"

"Sure he did, so fucking what? It's not like it's the first time some guy has hit on me."

"And nothing happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"And you don't even have to go out there anymore?"

"Probably not.

"Really?"

"Jesus, you are such a fucking twat sometimes. What did I just say?"

Justin looked at him, trying to decide how much Brian was really telling him. He wouldn't out and out lie, no, probably not—but he didn't always tell everything he knew. He was an expert at that. He made his decision.

The smile started, he had nothing to worry about. Brian had come home to him, just like he said that he would. He leaned the scant distance between them, gently kissing Brian's mouth, his cheeks, his forehead and back to his mouth. His tongue stroked across the full lips, gaining entrance, and meeting its counterpart in warmth and welcome.

They moved up to the bed, wanting the welcome home to be a real one, wanting to reconnect and needing to know that they were alright after the threat.

Later, around four in the morning with the loft warm and the two men sated, Brian was up reading over some reports from work he'd neglected while in California. Justin slept peacefully up in their bed, but Brian—adjusted to West Coat time was awake.

The phone rang; he got it on the first ring.

"It's four in the morning, what the fuck do you want?"

"I couldn't sleep, Bri. I just wanted to know that you made it back safely—you're OK?"

"I'm fine, Keith." Up on the bed Justin listened to half of the conversation.

"And Justin is alright?"

"He's fine, too. He's sleeping." It wasn't the subtlest of hints.

"Good. That's good. I guess you two are going to be together for a while."

"…Keith, why did you call?"

"I just wanted…I don't know—I guess I just wanted to talk to you."

"We talked for four days, we said everything we had to say."

There was a silence so long from Keith that Brian wondered if he was still there. Finally, "Do you mind if I call you now and then? I'd like us to at least be friends if that's OK with you."

Shit.

"Call me at my office, Keith, OK? If you want to talk to me, call me there."

"…Yeah, thanks, Bri. I will, I won't bother you at home—I know that would be awkward for you. Yeah, great—I'll call you at Vanguard."

"It's late. I have to get up for work in a couple of hours."

"Yeah, right, I know, get some sleep. Thanks, Bri—really, I just want us to be friends like we were." There was a self-conscious laugh. "Well, maybe not like that, but friends. Great. G'night, Bri."

The connected was broken.

Goddamnit, what a pain in the ass.

Yeah, sure the bonus was a nice one—over a hundred thousand just for him personally, but Brian had a feeling that it was going to be pretty Goddamn fucking expensive money.

Shit.

He turned out the reading lamp, got up and went to the bed, climbing in carefully so he wouldn't wake Justin. It was an almost full moon, giving enough light to see easily. Looking at the face on the other pillow he saw the blue eyes staring at him before they closed and Justin rolled over away from him, out of reach.

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