Nightmares

Justin sat perched in the middle of the bed as Brian took one last turn in the mirror. “How do I look?” Brian asked.

“You look fine.” Justin said.

“Just fine?”

“You look gorgeous.”

“That’s better.” Brian smiled, and gave his pouting baby a kiss on the forehead.

“I still don’t see why I can’t go.....”

“Don’t start with me Justin.” Brian picked up his keys, and started toward the front door.

Justin climbed out of bed, and followed him. “It wouldn’t take long for me to slip into my suit, I could be ready in five minutes.....”

“No Justin.”

“Everybody already knows you’re gay....”

“We’ve already gone over this baby.” Brian continued walking.

“What do they think I’m going to do, suck your dick underneath the dinner table?”

Brian stopped short, causing Justin to slam into his rear. He turned around and gave his shadow a final kiss. “That sounds interesting, keep that in mind for when I get back. Be good, daddy will be home before midnight.” Brian promised.

Vanguard Advertising’s annual client appreciation dinner was in full swing when Brian arrived. Pre-dinner cocktails were being served as the fashionably late were finding their respective seats. Gardner Vance spotted his top add man, and beckoned him over to the executive table. As Brian maneuvered his way through the fresh flowers, and porcelain place settings, he stopped briefly to speak to Cynthia, and her date.

“Everybody’s here.” Cynthia whispered. “Drexel Lab, Geodon, even Leo Brown himself from Brown Athletics decided to come, Kevin’s here too.”

“Kevin?” Brian looked toward Gardner’s table. Sure enough there was Kevin leaning over and talking to Leo Brown.

“Brian, over here!” Gardner waved.

Brian could feel the color drain from his face. He took a deep breath, and began walking toward his party. Leo Brown was the first to greet him. “There he is, the other half of my advertising genius.” The older man stood, and extended his hand. “How are you Brian?”

“Very well sir. How are you?” Brian smiled.

“Couldn’t be better thanks to you, and forty percent profit from new sales.” Leo smiled. “Brian I’d like you to meet my wife Gracie.”

“Hello Mrs. Brown.”

“This is some boy you have here Gardner.” Leo patted Brian on the back.

“Indeed he is Mr. Brown, indeed he is.” Gardner agreed.

“I have a surprise for you Brian, I brought Kevin along.” Mr. Brown smiled.

“Hello Brian.” Kevin stood, and extended his hand.

Brian forced a smile, and accepted the handshake. “Hello Kevin.”

“Brian, I’d like you to meet my wife Christy.”

In an instant Brian’s mind flashed back to the age of sixteen, and the night Kevin shattered his young heart........“Angel, you didn’t really believe I would leave my wife, that I would break up my home for you, did you? You know I couldn’t do that.” Kevin was genuinely trying to be kind.

“You said you loved me.” Brian cried.

“Angel, boys don’t fall in love with boys. Girls are for love, and marriage. Boys are for fun. I thought you understood that.”

“No, I didn’t understand that. I didn’t understand that you didn’t give a shit about me, that all I was to you was fun.” The teen could feel his world crumbling.

“I never said that Angel.”

“Don’t call me that. I’m not your Angel.” Brian continued to weep. “I’m just some kid that you like to fuck. I don’t understand how I can be good enough to fuck, but not good enough to love. Is it the same the other way around? Does that mean that Christy’s good enough to love, but not good enough to fuck?”

“Stop it Brian.”

“Do you think about me when you’re fucking her Kevin? Can she take it like me, or does it get you off to butt fuck me, then go home to your cunt? Does Christy know that her husband likes to fuck teenage boys? What if I tell her Kevin, better yet, what if I give her lessons!”

Kevin grabbed Brian’s hair, and pulled him back down onto the bed. The furious lover held the struggling teen by the throat with one hand, and slapped him hard with the other not once, but twice. “You little faggot!”.........“I’m very pleased to meet you Brian.” Christy McLauren smiled, and extended her hand.

Brian exchanged pleasantries to the other seated guests before taking his chair next to Gardner. He looked across the table at his former rival. Perhaps Christy McLauren had been a beauty in her day, but today she was a middle aged, rail thin, bottle blonde, who obviously had spent too much time in the sun without her screen. So this was Kevin’s Madonna, the prize that he kept on a pedestal who was good enough to love, and relegated Brian to just a mere fuck. Brian signaled the waiter, and ordered a double Jim Beam straight. It was going to be a long night.

Daphne leaned back on the sofa, and snapped her fingers to the beat emanating from Brian’s stereo. “So have you heard from Tony?” she asked.

Justin ran his electronic pencil across the computer screen. “No.” he lied.

“Man you sure blew it that time Justin. If you ask me, you should have stayed with Tony.”

“No one asked you.” Justin reminded his opinionated best friend, and continued with his homework.

“Just think, you could have been wintering in Paris with prime beef, instead you chose to freeze your ass off in the Pitts with chopped liver.”

“Brian is not chopped liver.” Justin frowned.

“Compared to Tony he is.”

“You never liked Brian.”

“No Justin, I don’t happen to like the narcissistic asshole who treats my best friend like shit.” Daphne stood up, and walked over to the refrigerator. She pulled out a two liter of Mountain Dew, then reached for two glasses from the cabinet.

“You don’t know Brian, he’s nothing like what you see. He’s completely different when it’s just the two of us.” Justin said in Brian’s defense.

Daphne poured the drinks, and walked one over to her friend. “He brought the trick home who raped you Justin.” she reminded him.

“I wish everyone would stop saying that, I wasn’t raped!” Justin insisted.

Daphne returned to her seat on the sofa. “Did you ever get counseling?” she asked. “Just because you’re a guy doesn’t mean that you don’t need counseling. In fact studies show that guys who have been raped may need counseling even more than women. I talked to my mom........”

“Why are you telling everybody?”

“I only told my mom. She gave me the names, and phone numbers of two people on her job that you could talk to.”

“I don’t need counseling, I told you I wasn’t raped. Now will you drop the subject please?” Justin again insisted.

Daphne continued. “I saw you when you came back Justin. You had more bruises on you than a prize fighter.” she said.

“I did not.”

“Did they ever catch the guy who hurt you?”

Justin took a swallow of his soda. “No.” he said.

“Where did Brian pick him up, “Babylon”? Had you ever seen him there before?”

“No...I...I don’t know.” Justin stuttered. “It was just a bad situation Daph that’s all.”

“What’s to say that it won’t happen again Justin? Every time Brian takes a notion to drag home a trick he’s putting your life in jeopardy.”

“He doesn’t do that anymore, we’re a couple now.”

“Couple my ass.” Daphne sneered. “How many times do I have to tell you Justin? Once a dog.......”

“Always a dog....I know, I know.” Justin finished his friend’s often repeated warning.

Daphne downed the last of her drink, and slipped on her jacket. “I have to go, I have an early class tomorrow. Think about what we talked about, and I’ll keep these numbers for you just in case you change your mind.” she said in parting.

Justin was happy to see his overly concerned friend to the door. He locked up the loft, then returned to the living room to retrieve their empty glasses. The music on the radio continued to play as he rinsed them out in the kitchen sink, and placed them in the counter rack for drying. Justin turned out the kitchen light, and walked over to the stereo. He was about to press the off button when a vaguely familiar tune began to pour out from the speakers. Justin froze in his tracks as the memory of his fatal night with Kevin suddenly came crashing back.............Justin wasn’t sure of the time. It felt like hours, or was it just minutes that he had submitted himself to the whims of Kevin, and his cowboy. He had heard a very drunk Brian’s repeated orders for the cowboy, and Kevin to stop, but the two men only laughed. Justin remembered climbing out of bed, and standing unnoticed in the bedroom doorway as Kevin straddled Brian, while the cowboy proceeded to bind his wrists. “Let him go.” Justin had said. “He’s too drunk to do anything, but I’m awake though.” The teen forced a smile, and with that the vultures turned their attention away from their captive prey, and focused in on Brian’s baby.

Justin cringed as he remembered the excruciating pain of an unwelcome entry that forced him to bite his bottom lip to keep from crying out. To awaken Brian would have meant placing him at the mercy of his two sadistic tricks. Justin unwisely concluded that his only choice was to wear them out. “Come on, is that all you’ve got?” He edged Kevin on as the older man rammed him mercilessly.

“Let the kid go, you’re hurting him.” The cowboy said.

“Bullshit! You like it rough, don’t you Angel?” Kevin grunted.

Justin closed his eyes, and clung to the cowboy who was holding him down. In the background he could hear the pulsating beat of an unknown tune as it drowned out his agony. “Oh god, please” Justin panted

“Come on man, let him go.” The cowboy pleaded with Kevin again.

“Hold still Angel. Take it like a man.” Kevin grunted..........Justin turned off the stereo and sank down onto the sofa, suddenly unable to catch his breath. As hard as he tried to forget it, the memory of that night kept coming back to haunt him. Justin wondered how long he would be able to hide his reoccurring nightmare from Brian.

After nearly two hours of business talk, intermingled with polite over dinner conversation, the band began to play. Brian checked his watch, it wasn’t even eight o’clock. Damn, it was still too early to leave. He leaned back in his seat, and watched as the couples filed onto the dance floor.  Brian unconsciously smiled as he recalled the night of Justin’s prom when he, and his baby had stunned the crowd with their fancy moves.

“Kevin tells me you’re an ex-student of his.” Christy interrupted Brian’s daydreaming.

Brian glanced over at Kevin, then back to Christy. “Yes, I was.” he said.

“I didn’t know that Brian, you never mentioned that you played high school sports.” Gardner said.

“I didn’t.”

Kevin interjected. “He wasn’t on any of the teams, however he was invaluable to me in the locker room.” Kevin smiled, and looked at Brian.

Brian shifted in his seat.

“Gardner where do you find such handsome young men? Are you married Brian?” Gracie Brown asked.

“No I’m afraid not.”

“I don’t believe it. How is it that a handsome, successful young man like yourself is still unattached?” Christy asked.

Gardner Vance held his breath for Brian’s reply. “I guess I haven’t found the right person.” Brian said politely.

“Our daughter Sarah just graduated from Columbia. She’s a beautiful girl, tall, blonde.....”

“Stop it Gracie you’re embarrassing him.” Leo Brown said.

“That’s quite alright, I happen to be rather fond of blondes.” Brian smiled.

“Mrs. Brown, may I have this dance?” Gardner Vance wisely ended the conversation, and the two headed off to the dance floor.

Again Brian checked his watch.

“Why do you keep checking the time Brian? It’s still early.” Christy McLauren batted her blue eyes. She reached across the table and took his hand. “Dance with me Brian.” she smiled.

Brian looked over at Kevin, then attempted to politely bow out. “I’m afraid I’m not much of a dancer.” he said.

“Nonsense, I’ll show you how.” Christy insisted.

Kevin took a sip of his drink as Brian followed his wife to the dance floor. He watched as Christy placed Brian’s left arm around her waist, and held his right hand in position. Brian reluctantly picked up the beat, and the couple began to sway. “Isn’t this nice?” Christy smiled.

“Very nice.” Brian lied.

Christy moved her body closer, pressing her breasts against Brian’s chest, and  her hips against his crouch. She moved her hand up the length of his back, then down again, allowing it to come to rest on the top of his butt. Brian could feel his face burning red. Was it just his imagination, or was this bitch actually feeling him up on the dance floor? One look over Christy’s shoulder at Cynthia’s table confirmed his suspicions. Brian’s assistant’s eyes were wide, and her face was as red as his as she fought to hold back her laughter. If only the floor would open up and swallow him, Cynthia was never going to let him live this one down. How long was this damned song, was it ever going to end? Shit, Christy’s hand was roaming again.

Mercifully the music paused just long enough for Brian to make a hasty retreat to the dining hall terrace. He quickly fired up a cigarette, and took a long drag, then watched as the white smoke dissipated upward into the starry Pittsburgh sky. Again Brian looked at his watch, Christ it wasn’t even nine o’clock.

“Hello Angel.”

“Go away Kevin, before I pitch your ass over this balcony.” Brian warned, without turning around.

Kevin came closer, and stood next to him. “I’m sorry Angel, but I had to bring Christy this time. She wanted to do some shopping.” he said.

Brian didn’t reply. He took another drag from his cigarette, and continued to look out into the Pittsburgh night.

“Angel, you’re not still upset about your boy are you? I told you it was nothing.” Kevin assured him.

Brian turned, and looked at Kevin in disbelief. “Nothing? You raped him!” he hissed.

“I didn’t rape him.” Kevin chuckled. “If anything it was the other way around. He certainly is your boy Brian, a fiery little thing. He reminds me of you when I first met you. You were the hottest little thing. Even at fourteen I knew you.....”

“I told you that Justin was off limits.” Brian interrupted him.

“I’m sorry Angel, but I couldn’t resist him. When we got back to your place he was there. He called for the cowboy, and me to come over. He said he wanted to do us both.”

“So the two of you decided to prison fuck him.”

“It wasn’t like that Brian. I’ll admit, it may have gotten a little rough but....”

“A little rough?.......”

“You know I’d never hurt your boy Angel. I’m telling you he loved it, he kept begging for more. He took it like a man.” Kevin smiled.

“There you are. I was wondering where you ran to.” Christy McLauren had stepped onto the terrace. “Come inside you two, you’ll catch your death out here.” she warned.

Brian looked at Christy, then back to Kevin. This was his time, the moment he had been waiting a lifetime for. He would expose Kevin’s secret life to his perfect little wife, and crumble his proper suburban world forever. Brian took a deep breath, and summonsed up his courage. He attempted to speak but for some reason the words wouldn’t come. In an instant Brian’s mind had regressed, this time past the age of sixteen, back to the long suppressed incident in the gym shower room that he never told anyone about, not even Michael.

A fourteen year old Brian had been hopelessly in love with his handsome gym teacher, but he hadn’t been prepared for what Kevin’s love would entail. “Take it like a man.” He heard Kevin say somewhere in the long locked dungeons of his mind. The cold January night suddenly became hotter than July, zapping his breath in a blanket of heat. Now trembling Brian clinched the balcony railing as his body recalled in vivid detail the memory of Kevin’s painful initiation into manhood.

“Brian, are you alright?” Christy asked.

Again Brian looked at Kevin who was still smiling, then back to Christy. “Please forgive me, but I have to call it a night.” He somehow managed to say, then quickly made his exit.

Brian slid the loft door open to pitch black silence. Thank God, Justin was already asleep. He needed time to himself to process his feelings about what had just happened tonight. Brian had fantasized about what he would do to Kevin the next time that he saw him, but somehow those thoughts vanished the moment Kevin smiled. What was it about the sadistic piece of shit that still had such a firm grip on Brian’s heart? After everything that Kevin had done to him, what was it that still made him breathless whenever Kevin was near? Brian maneuvered his way through the darkness of the loft, to the soft neon blue of the bedroom. He quietly undressed, and slipped underneath the covers behind Justin before closing his eyes, and drifting off to sleep.

The bedside clock was glowing 2:00am when Brian was awakened by the now familiar rustling in his bed. He looked over at Justin, dear God it was going to be another rough night. Once again Justin was fighting in his sleep. The nightmares that began shortly after their return from Chicago were reoccurring more frequently now. Brian watched helplessly, and listened for the thousandth time as Justin struggled, and pleaded for Kevin to stop. Sometimes the battle would last for only minutes, other times it would rage on throughout the night. Brian gathered his tormented baby in his arms, and gently stroked his hair. “It’s alright Justin, it’s me baby.” Brian whispered. Damn you Kevin, Brian cried.

NEXT WEEK:  Over Easy

Return to Fantasy Season 3