Damage Control Sweeps
Brian had received an urgent early morning message from Joan Kinney. She needed to see her son immediately. He telephoned her, but she insisted on speaking with him face to face. Of course Joannie would have to call today, on one of the most important days of Brian’s life. Securing the Brown Athletics account had proven to be easier than anticipated. Once again talent, cunning, and perseverance had gotten Brian exactly what he wanted. The stipulation that he negotiated with Mr. Brown was nothing less than genius. Brian would be handling all Brown Athletics accounts personally, and since Brown Athletics would not be insulted by having their account handled by just another grunt, Gardner Vance had no choice but to make Brian Kinney his new partner.
As always Brian was prepared, but today was special. He needed to look, and feel his best, because today Mr. Kinney would be delivering his first proposal as partner. Justin had given him an early morning fuck for luck, and Brian had chosen his new merlot Armani suit, with coordinating shirt, and tie. Four senior executives of Brown Athletics had been flown in from Chicago to meet with him. The nine o’clock appointment was an excellent excuse to keep Brian’s meeting with his mother brief.
Brian left for work early that Wednesday morning, and headed for the old neighborhood. Things hadn’t changed much. The endless rows of modestly priced brick bungalows that hid family secrets seemed to be frozen in time. Family sedans, and mini vans parked in the driveways, manicured lawns, backyard patio sets, and Weber grills were a perfect cover for the atrocities that went on inside the single family dwellings. Most of the adult neighbors Brian grew up with were still there, including Lee and Rose Baxter.
Brian’s father Jack, and Lee Baxter were weekend drinking buddies who celebrated paydays by getting drunk, and beating their wives for ruining their lives. After which Jack would go to the local VFW post to sit, drink more, then return home to inflict equal punishment on Brian, who for some reason drew his father’s contempt. Rose Baxter was the neighborhood busybody, who hid her own family horror by delivering the latest neighborhood gossip. She would come over shortly after Lee left for work, and spend hours sipping sherry with Joannie, bragging on her children, and discussing everyone else’s business.
Brian rang the bell at the house he often referred to as the chamber of horrors. Joannie was quick to answer the door. “Hello Brian, come in. Would you like a drink?” she offered, as she lead him to the dining room.
Brian took a seat at the well polished table. He watched his mother’s hand tremble as she reached for the sherry bottle. “No thanks.” he said. “It’s only seven thirty, that’s kind of early to start drinking isn’t it mom?” Joannie didn’t answer, she proceeded to fill her snifter. “What’s wrong mom, why the urgent call?” Brian asked.
Joannie took a seat across from her son. “I don’t know any delicate way of putting this Brian, so I’m going to come strait out, and say it. Mrs. Baxter was shopping at the new strip mall on Saturday. She said she saw you kissing, and fondling a boy in “Delano Jewelers”. Is that true Brian?”
Brian was completely unprepared for that one. He had to think quickly. “Mom, you called me all the way over here for gossip?” He tried to back away.
“She said you were buying him gifts, and that he called you.....” Joannie took a swallow if her sherry. “She said he was calling you daddy. Is that true Brian?”
“Of course not, I don’t know what she’s talking about.” Brian lied before taking the defense. “Rose Baxter is a goddamn busybody who should mind her own business.”
Joannie starred at her son. “Don’t lie to me Brian.”
Brian shifted in his seat, and turned away from his mother’s gaze. “His name is Justin, and he’s not a boy, he’s nineteen.” Brian said.
“That’s not what Rose said. She said the child couldn’t be more than fifteen.”
“Rose is a liar.”
“Is she also lying about you fondling him, and buying him gifts?”
“How I spend my money is my business, and I wasn’t fondling anyone.”
“What is he, some kind of male prostitute? Is that what you’re into now Brian?”
Brian looked at his mother. “Justin’s not a prostitute. He’s my lover. I’m his boyfriend. I was buying him a birthday present. I’m gay mom.” Brian’s last sentence barely made it out.
“Oh my god.” Joannie rolled her eyes, and refilled her snifter. “Since when did you turn homosexual Brian? Is this the latest craze in that strange neighborhood of yours?” You were always a child who would try anything.”
“I didn’t turn homosexual mom, this isn’t a trend. I.....”
“I didn’t raise a homosexual child.” Joannie interrupted him. “You weren’t a homosexual teenager, you had girlfriends for Christ sake. This is something you’ve taken up on your own. God, your father must be turning over in his grave.” Joannie made the sign of the crucifix.
“Dad knew, I told him before he died.” Brian said.
“You told him what, that you like to molest young boys?”
“No mom, I told him that I was gay, and stop saying that I molest young boys, Justin’s nineteen.”
“You said you were buying him a birthday gift, that means he just turned nineteen. You’re thirty years old Brian, how old was that child when you started fooling around with him?”
“That’s none of your business.”
Joannie’s eyes narrowed with contempt. “That’s what I thought.” she said.
Brian stood, and headed for the front door, with his mother hot at his heels. “This shouldn’t surprise me.” she said. “You’ve always been a strange child who would do anything for attention, like the time you lied on your Uncle Frank.”
Brian stopped, and turned to face his mother. “I didn’t lie on Uncle Frank.” he said defiantly. “The bastard molested me from the time I was four, until I was ten. If you, and Jack hadn’t been so fucking drunk every time he came over to the house, you would have known something was going on. I even told you, but instead of believing me, you let Jack beat the shit out of me for lying.”
“Your Uncle Frank has been married for thirty years. He’s raised four children, two of them boys. Why would he molest you?” Joannie denied. “Stop lying Brian. Stop trying to blame others for your sick desires.”
“Fuck this.” Brian turned, and once again attempted to leave, but as luck would have it, the goddamn door was stuck.
Joannie continued her verbal assault, as Brian struggled to get away. “I suppose you’re going to blame your Uncle Frank for the time when you were twelve, and you were caught in the garage with that teenage boy. I couldn’t believe the dirty, disgusting things his parents said you were doing. We had to move because of you. Did you know that Brian? What am I suppose to do this time. It’s all over the neighborhood, about you and that boy in the jewelry store. Must you insist on bring shame to this family again?”
Brian continued to fight with the door. He pushed it with his shoulder, hit it with his fist, and kicked it before it finally opened. The chamber of horrors had continued to live up to its reputation. Joan Kinney’s words had been torturous. Mortally wounded, Brian fled for his life. He leaped into the jeep, and sped down the street amidst the stares of curious neighbors who were outside watering their lawns. It wasn’t until he was halfway to work that Brian pulled over onto a side street to catch his breath. He had to pull himself together. In less than an hour he would be making the presentation of a lifetime. Everything that Brian had worked so hard for was riding on this meeting.
Brian looked in the rearview mirror, and wiped the tears away that now blurred his vision. He took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly before straightening his tie, and brushing his fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes, and took a second cleansing breath as he did a quick mental damage control sweep. “I’m alright, I’m ok.” Brian whispered to himself, before opening his eyes, and continuing to work.
Four of Brown Athletics senior executives were gathered for their first meeting, and Gardner Vance was nothing less than thrilled at the prospect of introducing his new hot-shot partner to Vanguard Advertising’s most important client to date. More heads than usual turned as the Cleo award winning add man strutted toward conference room one. “Go get em tiger.” Cynthia uttered to her boss as he breezed past. Brian looked over his shoulder, and gave his assistant a confident wink before opening the door.
“There he is, Brian come in.” Gardner Vance welcomed him. “Gentlemen this is our new partner Brian Kinney. Brian this is William Trent.” Brian greeted each of his new clients with a handshake, as Gardner introduced them one, by one. “This is Jeffery Ballard, Jonathan Bain, and Kevin McLauren.”
Brian’s heart skipped a beat, the name, the eyes, the touch were unmistakable. It had been fourteen years, and Brian was now shaking hands with his former PE instructor/first love/first heartbreak, Kevin Mclauren. Brian took his seat at the long conference room table, as Gardner Vance began the meeting with an overview of Vanguard Advertising. Brian tried to calm the growing butterflies in his stomach by going over his proposal in his head, but his eyes kept drifting over to Kevin. Brian shifted in his seat, and leaned back in his chair, but no position was comfortable. He could feel the heat of Kevin’s eyes watching him as he desperately tried to control the sweaty palms, and nervous fidgeting that was rapidly overtaking him. Painful high school memories surfaced, and began to replay in his Brian ’s mind, including the last time he, and Kevin were together......
Brian wiggled his hips against Kevin’s ass. He kissed his lover’s back, reached around, and slowly stroked the older man’s cock. “Stop it Angel” Kevin smiled “It’s getting late. We have to go.”
“We don’t have to go now.” Brian purred. “I’m still horny.”
“You’re always horny.”
“I can’t help it, I’m sixteen.” the boy moaned.
“Angel.”
“Hummmm?”
“We have to talk.”
Brian kissed the back of his lover’s neck. “Now?” he whispered.
Kevin turned over to face the teen. Brian snuggled closer and kissed his lover’s chest. Anything involving Kevin Mclauren had the boy’s full attention. Brian had been in love with the handsome PE Instructor since day one. He followed him around like a faithful puppy, volunteering to care for the equipment, clean the athletic room, anything to be near his beloved. Although the young teacher had given plenty of signals, it was a fourteen year old Brian who made the first move. Inexperienced about exactly what to do, Mr. McLauren became the delighted recipient of the first Brian Kinney blowjob. Kevin called him a natural, and quickly introduced the sexy boy to the erotic pleasures of anal penetration. Kevin was Brian’s first, and Brian was in love.
“Angel, we can’t see each other anymore.” Kevin said. “I took a job in Chicago, we’re moving at the end of the month.”
“Moving, what do you mean moving?” Brian asked.
“Christy and I are moving to Chicago. We’ve already bought our house.”
“Why?”
“I’ve been offered the coaching position that I applied for, and I’ve accepted it.”
“When did you apply for another position?”
“Over the summer.”
“When were you going to tell me?”
“I wanted to wait until I knew something definite.” Kevin said.
“What about us?” Brian asked.
“There is no more us Angel.”
Brian sat up in bed. He looked at Kevin, hoping to find some clue in his lover’s eyes that would give away this cruel joke, but Kevin was dead serious. “Wait.” Brian said, still not believing the sudden change of event. “You said that you loved me. You said we were going to be together, that you were waiting until I turned eighteen.”
“I have a wife Angel, you know that.”
“You said you didn’t love her. You said you wanted to be with me.”
“Christy’s pregnant Brian.”
The boy lowered his head and began to cry. Kevin reached for him, but Brian pulled away. “No! You lied to me.” he said.
“Angel, you didn’t really believe I would leave my wife, that I would break up my home for you, did you? You know I couldn’t do that.” Kevin was genuinely trying to be kind. “
“You said you loved me.” Brian cried.
Kevin moved closer to him. “Angel, people say a lot of things when sex is involved. Sometimes it’s meant to deceive. Sometimes it’s just the heat of the moment. People always say I love you. Most of the time it doesn’t really mean anything.”
“It means something to me.” Brian whimpered between tears. “I love you Kevin.”
The older man gently lifted the boys face, and looked into his eyes. “Angel, boys don’t fall in love with boys. Girls are for love, and marriage. Boys are for fun. I thought you understood that.”
“No, I didn’t understand that.” Brian said. “I didn’t understand that you didn’t give a shit about me, that all I was to you was fun.” The teen could feel his world crumbling.
“I never said that Angel.”
“Don’t call me that. I’m not your Angel.” Brian cried. “I’m just some kid that you like to fuck. I don’t understand, how I can be good enough to fuck, but not good enough to love. Is it the same the other way around? Does that mean that Christy’s good enough to love, but not good enough to fuck?”
“Stop it Brian.”
“Do you think about me when you’re fucking her Kevin? Can she take it like me, or does it get you off to butt fuck me, then go home to your cunt?”
“Shut up Brian.”
Brian began to laugh. “I’ll bet your kid turns out to look like me. Does Christy know that her husband likes to fuck teenage boys? What if I tell her Kevin, better yet, what if I give her lessons!”
“I told you to shut up!” The older man grabbed Brian by the hair, and pulled the teen onto the bed. Brian continued to laugh hysterically as Kevin straddled him, pinning the teen’s arms to the bed. “Shut up!” Kevin yelled again.
“Fuck you!” Brian yelled back.
The furious lover grabbed Brian by the throat with one hand, and slapped him hard with the other not once, but twice. “You little faggot! If you come near my wife, I’ll kill you. Do you understand me Brian?” Kevin growled as he tightened his grip on the Brian’s throat.
Brian could taste his own blood that was now trickling from the corner of his mouth. The teen continued to cry uncontrollably, as he struggled to free himself from the grip around his throat. The sight of Brian gasping for air brought the older man back to his senses. Kevin released his hold, and sat on the side of the bed, burying his face in his hands, and regretting what had just happened.
Brian recoiled, onto his side. “How can you do this, how can you do this? You lied to me, you said you loved me.” he wailed, as he struggled to catch his breath.
Kevin cradled him in his arms. “I’m sorry Angel, I never meant to hurt you. God knows I didn’t.”
“Please don’t leave me Kevin, I love you.” Brian whispered.
The older man held the devastated teen close to his chest, and gently stroked his hair. “You don’t want me Angel. I’m too old for you, plus I’m married, and I’ve got a baby on the way. You’ll fall in love with someone else, a nice girl your own age. You’ll have your own family, and won‘t even think about me.”
“No I won’t. I’ll never love anybody else.” Brian cried. “I’ll never love anybody else.”
“........Brian Kinney.” Gardner had finished his presentation, and turned the floor over to his partner. When Brian didn’t respond to his cue, Gardner leaned over, and discretely attracted his attention. “Brian?” Gardner whispered.
Brian up looked at his boss, then slowly rose from his seat. He buttoned his jacket before taking his place at the podium, then looked at each of the executives assembled before him, his eyes finally coming to rest on Kevin. Brian nervously placed his hands on both sides of the podium, and inwardly took a deep breath. He threw his head back, flashed a confident smile, and in true Cleo award winning form delivered a presentation that had Gardner Vance, and the top brass of Brown Athletics literally applauding at its conclusion. It was the presentation of a lifetime. Afterwards Gardner invited the delighted new clients into his office for a victory drink. As the team filed out of conference room one, Kevin McLauren lingered behind to speak with Brian.
“Brian Kinney, top man for a top advertising agency. It doesn’t surprise me. You were always so tenacious, so driven. I knew you’d do well. How are you Brian?” Kevin asked.
“I’m fine, and yourself?” Brian asked casually, as he collected his scattered papers.
“I’m good.” Kevin said.
“How’s the family?” Brian asked unenthusiastically.
“Christy’s fine. Our daughter Jasmine just turned fourteen.”
“That’s nice.” Brian said, still not bothering to look at Kevin.
“Brian.”
“What?”
“We need to talk.”
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to out you, if that‘s what you’re thinking.”
“I’m not worried about that.” Kevin said. “I’m staying at “The Willshire”, will you come and see me before I leave?”
Brian closed his briefcase, and finally looked at Kevin. “Why would you want to see me?” he asked. “What could you possibly have to say to me that you didn’t say that Tuesday night, fourteen years ago? I remember everything you told me Kevin. You said that I wasn’t worth loving, that I was just something to amuse you, because boys didn’t fall in love with boys. Girls are for love and marriage, boys are just for fun, and fucking. I got your message Kevin when you wrapped one hand around my throat, and slapped the shit out of me with the other. I heard you loud and clear as I was choking on my own blood, and gasping for air. You called me a little faggot, and swore that you’d kill me if I ever said anything about us to your wife. Was there something else that you forgot to say Kevin, or did that pretty much cover it all?” Brian waited for his answer, but Kevin was speechless. Brian smiled. “You’d better hurry Kev, you’re missing the party.” he said.
Kevin exited conference room one to join the others, leaving Brian alone as he fought back the hurt. He closed his eyes, and for the second time that morning conducted yet another mental damage control sweep. Brian didn’t notice that Cynthia had stuck her head inside of the door. “You’re going to miss the party.” she smiled. “Brian, are you ok boss?”
Brian opened his eyes, and smiled. “I’m fine, I’m ok.” he lied.
Justin made it through the loft door just as the bottom fell out of the over stuffed brown bag he was carrying. “Shit!” He cursed at the fleeing bottle of wine rolling across the polished wooden floor. As he attempted to retrieve his fallen groceries, the bunch of red balloons he was holding in his left hand got away. Justin watched as the six colorful spheres floated gingerly to the top of the loft. “Shit” he cursed again. Brian would be home in a couple of hours, the teen didn’t have much time. It wasn’t everyday that one was made partner, and Justin wanted to mark the occasion with a private celebration before they headed to Babylon later that night. However things were not going well. The decorations were now drifting along the loft ceiling, and dinner was spread across the floor. Justin picked up the baked chicken, luckily it had been packaged well. If only he could say the same for the cake. It had slid to the side of the box, and now had one side of smeared frosting. “Oh shit, the ice cream.” Justin said. He picked up the container of vanilla, and hurried it into the freezer. Justin finished retrieving his dinner fixings. He prepared the salad, placed the chicken in the oven on warm, and sat the bottle of wine in the fridge, before attempting to salvage the cake. After a few tricky maneuvers with a butter knife, the devil’s food cake, with milk chocolate frosting was again presentable. “Not bad.” he smiled.
The teen looked at his watch, it was almost four o’clock. Brian would be getting off at five. Justin headed to the bedroom to place the almond scented candles on the nightstand. As he reached the top of the steps he was startled by the sight of Brian in bed. “Brian?” Justin gently called to him. The older man laid motionless on his side, half covered by blue sheeting. The teen came closer, and stretched out across the bed. He lightly touched his lover’s shoulder. Brian’s skin was pale, and cold. “Brian!” Justin shook him hard.
“What!” Brian bolted upright.
“Jesus Christ.” Justin sighed with relief.
“What time is it?”
“It’s almost four o’clock.”
“Four o’clock?” Brian’s eyes shifted from side to side.
“Four o’clock in the afternoon Brian.” Justin clarified for him.
“Shit.” Brian laid back down, and pulled the covers over his head.
“What are you doing at home?”
“I came home early, I wasn’t feeling well.” Brian mumbled from underneath the sheet.
“What’s wrong?”
“Headache.” Brian’s voice drifted.
“You’re cold as ice. Brian...Brian!” Justin shook him again. “What’s wrong with you? Brian wake up!”
“I’m up baby.”
Justin looked around the room. Sitting on the nightstand were two prescription bottles. One was Brian’s blood pressure pills, the other one was Valium. Justin lifted the empty glass sitting next to them to his nose, and sniffed. “Brian did you take these with liquor? You know you can’t drink with these. How many did you take? BRIAN!”
“Hummm?”
Justin grabbed Brian’s wrists, and pulled him to a sitting position. “Where are we going baby?” Brian slurred.
“You’re going to the shower.”
Brian hesitated. “Are you coming with me?”
Justin pulled him to his feet. “Yes, I’m coming with you.” he said.
Brian followed Justin into the bathroom where the teen turned on the shower, and shoved him in underneath the warm spray. “I thought you were coming with me.” Brian called over the running water.
“I am.” Justin called back. As the teen bent down to untie his shoes, Brian stepped out of the shower. He wrapped his arms around Justin’s waist, and pulled him into the water. “Brian, let me take my clothes off first!”
“God you’re beautiful.” Brian smiled. He pulled his baby close for a kiss, as Justin struggled to get out of the drenched clothing that was now clinging to his body. “Do you love me baby?”
Justin rolled his tee over his head. “Yes Brian, I love you.” he said.
Brian watched as the teen worked his way out of his pants, and shorts, then bent over to remove his socks. “I want you to fuck me baby.” he said.
Justin straightened up, and turned to face Brian. “Can’t you wait until I get my clothes off?” he smiled.
Brian snaked his arms around Justin’s waist, and pulled him close. He kissed his baby’s forehead, his cheek, his neck. “I want you to fuck me bareback baby.” Brian whispered near Justin’s ear.
“What?”
Brian moved his hands across Justin’s back, and rocked his hips against the teen’s crouch. “I need to feel you baby.” he whispered.
“Stop it Brian, you’re drunk.” Justin said firmly.
Brian stopped, momentarily bewildered. “I’m sorry.” he said, then exited the shower.
Justin waited a few minutes before following him. Something was terribly wrong. He had seen Brian falling down drunk, and practically out of his mind on drugs, but he had never acted so strangely before. Maybe something happened at work. Justin dried himself, and walked back toward the bedroom. As he came upon the bedroom doorway Justin could hear the sound of Brian sobbing. The teen rush over to the bed, and cradled him. “Brian what’s wrong?”
“They’re not going to let me have you.” he cried.
“What? Who are they, what are you talking about Brian?” Justin pleaded.
“No one has ever touched me before, and when you’re gone no one ever will.” Brian cried.
The teen stroked his lover’s hair, and kissed his forehead, but the tears kept coming. Finally, out of desperation Justin began to rock him. “I’m not going anywhere Brian. I love you.” Justin said.
“Boys don’t love boys.” Brian whimpered.
“Oooooh yes they do.” Justin cooed, as he gently swayed back, and forth. “Who told you that?”
“I’m not dirty baby.”
“No Brian, you’re not dirty.” Justin rocked him.
“I’m ok.”
“Yes Brian, you’re ok.”
Brian looked up at Justin through swollen red eyes. “Are you sure?”
Justin kissed him ever so gently on the forehead. “Yes Brian, I’m sure.” he smiled.