Whatever It Takes

Chapter 5

Brian woke up to the smell of breakfast cooking, and couldn't help but smile. Apparently, his house guest decided to make himself at home. He rose from the bed and headed to the shower, needing a few moments to gather his thoughts before joining the blond in the kitchen. He couldn't believe that he had opened up to the kid the way he had the night before. He didn't want to think about why he felt so comfortable in Justin's presence. After he showered and dressed, he made his way out to the kitchen, smiling at the vision he saw there. Justin was buzzing around the small area, trying to juggle four different tasks at once.

"Need some help?

"Brian! Yes, I do. Could you finish cooking the eggs while I finish up the bacon and toast. I wanted to make you a nice breakfast, but it's a lot harder than I thought. My mom always made it look so easy." Justin laughed, obviously frazzled.

Brian just laughed as he went over and finished cooking. He thought it was sweet that Justin felt the need to cook for him. Maybe he should keep him around for awhile so he didn't have to rely on take out so much. Shocked by his thoughts, he shook his head and continued with his task. Within a matter of minutes, breakfast was ready and they were sitting down, getting ready to eat.

"How did you sleep?" Brian asked, as he reached for the toast.

"Better than I did in the hospital. How about you?" He asked, leaving out the part about how he tossed and turned for the first couple of hours, trying to push away thoughts of Brian sleeping so close by.

"Pretty good." Brian replied, his mind drifting back to the improper thoughts he had about the blond on the couch.

The conversation turned to the weather and the early snow storm that was heading their way for the weekend. Once they were done eating, they cleaned up side by side and moved into the living room to watch the parade. Time flew and soon they were on their way to Melanie's house for their holiday dinner.

"Before we get there, I just want to warn you about what to expect. My friends are my family. They are a little...strange, I guess you could say. Don't let them scare you." Brian explained, hoping that everyone would be on their best behavior.

"Brian, I'm sure I will love them. You don't need to explain anyone to me. If they love you, they're alright in my book." Justin said shyly. "Thanks again for letting me spend the holiday with you and your friends. I don't know where I would be if it wasn't for you."

"Justin? You don't have to keep thanking me. I told you before that I am glad I can help, but if you say thank you one more time, I'm tossing your ass out of the car!" Brian teased, uncomfortable with Justin's obvious appreciation. It made him feel guilty for the thoughts that kept running through his mind.

"Yes, Sir!" Justin joked back, realizing that Brian wasn't comfortable with praise.

When they entered the townhouse a few minutes later, the holiday festivities were already in full swing. Everyone was there, laughing and sharing stories of years past. Gus noticed them first.

"Dad!" He exclaimed, running to his father.

"Hey, Sonny Boy!" Brian replied with a smile.

"It's about time you got here. Grandma Debbie keeps pinching my cheeks and telling me how cute I am. Can you make her stop?" Gus asked with all the exasperation of a ten year old.

"Gus. I've been trying to get Grandma Debbie to stop pinching my cheeks for fifteen years and it hasn't worked yet. What makes you think that I can help you?" Brian replied, laughing.

"I heard that!" Debbie exclaimed, pulling Brian in for a killer hug. "I'm so happy to see you. And who is your new friend?" She asked, eyeing the blond next to him.

Her words caused everyone in the room to stop talking and look at Justin with curiosity. Brian shook his head and smiled before replying. "Everyone, this is Justin. He's a friend of mine, who didn't have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving. Justin, this is everyone."

"Hello. Thank you for allowing me to spend Thanksgiving with all of you." Justin smiled in greeting.

A quiet murmur went through the room as everyone tried to figure out exactly how friendly the older man was with the boy. Debbie spoke first. "Welcome, Sunshine. Any friend of Brian's, is a friend of ours."

"Sunshine?" Justin questioned.

"With a smile like that, what else could I call you?" Debbie explained with a chuckle.

"How about Justin?" Brian replied, dryly.

Debbie ignored his comment and grabbed Justin by the hand, dragging him towards the group of people anxious to find out his story, and away from Brian. 'This should be interesting' Brian thought to himself as he watched them walk away. He headed for the liquor cabinet in desperate need of something to calm his nerves. He didn't think about how uncomfortable he was going to be here when he invited the boy to come with him. Then again, it probably wouldn't have mattered anyway. There was no way he would have been able to leave Justin alone in the hospital over the long weekend. After downing a couple of drinks, he made his way back to the group in time to hear Debbie trying to explain who everyone was.

"My brother Vic and I met Brian when he was fourteen. He was the new kid in school and became friends with my son Michael. He's not here now. He and his boyfriend Ben moved to California last year when Ben was offered a teaching position at Berkley. They'll be home for Christmas. Ted and Emmett are friends of Michael and Brian's. They were best friends, who are now trying to develop a relationship. Melanie is Gus's mother and our gracious hostess for the evening. I think that's everyone. So what about you? How come you aren't with your family for the holidays?"

"Well...I..." Justin wasn't sure how to answer that. He didn't really feel comfortable enough to talk about his problems around people he had just met. It was obvious that most of the group was gay, which made him feel at ease, but he really wasn't ready to share just yet.

"His family had to go out of town unexpectedly and Justin didn't want to go, so I invited him here. That's okay, isn't it?" He asked, looking over at Mel for approval.

"That's fine, Brian. I told you that you could invite someone to come with you. I had hoped it would be a date, but I should have known better. Justin is more than welcome to spend the day with us. Now dinner is just about ready. Everyone get settled at the table. Brian, could you help me in the kitchen?" Mel had asked, causing everyone to look around in surprise. Brian never helped in the kitchen. No one was even sure if he knew where the kitchen was.

Brian looked at Melanie, sensing he was in trouble. She would never ask him for help, which meant that she wanted to talk to him in private. Figuring he might as well get it over with, he smiled in reply. "Sure, Mel."

Once they were alone, Melanie said exactly what was on her mind. "Okay, Brian. Who is this kid and what are you doing with him?"

"I told you Mel, he just..."

"Bullshit, Kinney. I'm not buying that whole 'his parents are out of town' garbage. I'm a lawyer, remember? I know when someone is hiding something so you might as well just come clean now. Admit it. You have a soft spot for this kid." She was pulling the turkey out of the oven as she spoke.

Brian knew there was no way he'd be able to get past her with his balls intact. He figured the best way to deal with her was to be honest. "Look, Mel, I don't want anyone else to know. I need your word that this stays between us."

"Brian, you know I wouldn't say anything to anyone if you didn't want them to know. What's going on?" She asked, suddenly focusing all her attention on Brian.

"Justin is a patient of mine. He's eighteen years old and was disowned when his parents found out he was gay. He tried to kill himself because of it. Do you see why I have a soft spot for him?"

"Lindsay." Melanie said, softly.

"Yes. Mel, he was so upset to find out that his friend found him in time and he survived. When his father finally showed up at the hospital, it was only to remind him that as long as he insisted on his disgusting lifestyle, he didn't have a home. He's made remarkable progress in the last week. Enough that under normal circumstances I would have released him on an out patient basis, but he had nowhere else to go. I couldn't leave him in the hospital for the holidays. The poor kid has no one to turn to. I figured he could stay with me for the weekend. Then we would see what his options are." Brian explained, once again thinking about all the kid's problems.

"Poor Justin. Do you want me to see what I can do? Maybe there is some way I can help him." Melanie offered, feeling sorry for Justin.

"Thanks Mel. I appreciate it. Maybe we could come by on Sunday and discuss what we should do next. I can't help but feel that I have been given a second chance to make up for what happened with Lindsay. I can't screw this one up." Brian admitted, knowing that Mel would understand.

"Brian, it wasn't your fault. It wasn't anybody's fault. You need to forgive yourself. Lindsay wouldn't want you walking around blaming yourself for her choice. She knew she could have come to us and chose not to. It's time to let it go and move on. What you are doing for Justin is a wonderful thing, but you need to do it for him, not for Lindsay." Melanie could see a mixture of emotions cross Brian's face and knew he was deep in thought. "You care about him, don't you?"

"What? Of course I do, Mel. I care about all of my patients." Brian replied.

Melanie saw the look of guilt and knew that she hit the nail on the head. "I don't mean that, Brian. You're attracted to him. He's somehow managed to make his way into your heart."

"You're crazy. He's just a patient. Nothing more." Brian said, too quickly.

"Right! Well, just be careful. He's very young, probably inexperienced, and has more problems than any eighteen year old should have. He needs guidance now, not a quick fuck or two." Melanie knew it wasn't her business, but needed to say what was on her mind.

"Come on Mel, you know me better than that. I never fuck the same person twice. Now hurry up with dinner. I'm starving." Brian joked, before walking out of the kitchen. He needed to put some distance between him and Melanie. She obviously didn't know what she was talking about. Justin was just his patient, wasn't he?

Justin sat at the table, listening to everyone talk about their plans for Christmas. It made him realize that he would still have no one then. By that time, Brian would be gone, too. He pushed away those thoughts and focused on the family before him. They may not have been the typical family, but there was no doubt about the love they had for one another. Then he heard Emmett say something that caught his attention.

"Why do you think Melanie thought Brian would bring a date today? She knows his ideas on love and dating. Is there something we don't know about? Has Mr. Kinney crossed over the line and met somebody?"

"Not that I know of? I haven't felt the world shift off its axis lately. Has he said anything to you, Vic?" Debbie asked, wondering if she had missed something.

"Not a word. Has Michael said anything to you in his last call? I would think he would know before the rest of us." Vic offered.

"No, but you know I'll be asking when he calls tonight." Debbie assured them.

Justin couldn't help but jump in, curious as to why everyone was talking about Brian as if he wasn't in the next room. "Why don't you just ask him? I'm sure he would tell you if he was seeing someone."

"Oh, my dear Sunshine. You obviously don't know Brian that well. He wouldn't just come out and tell anyone anything. He's a very private person, which is why we have to resort to talking about him when he leaves the room. Has he said anything to you? Do you know if he has a boyfriend lurking in the shadows?" Debbie asked.

Boyfriend? Brian was gay? Justin had no idea. He wasn't sure if he was surprised or not. Ever since their first meeting, Justin had just assumed Brian was straight. Now, after meeting his friends, it made sense. It also caused a lot of unexplained feelings to course through his mind. It was easier to fight his attraction to the older man when he thought he liked women. How was he going to be able to sleep at night, knowing that Brian was asleep in the other room now that he knew he was gay? Before Justin had a chance to answer Debbie, Brian appeared in the doorway.

"Pumping the kid for information, Debbie? I didn't think you would sink that low." Brian held back a smile while he spoke.

"I wasn't pumping him, Brian. I simply asked a question. That's all." Debbie felt herself blush at being caught.

"A question that you should only be asking me, to which I would reply that it's none of your business." Brian stated as he took a seat alongside Justin.

"Brian," Debbie said, showing her exasperation at his reply.

"Leave it alone, Deb. You know my thoughts. Nothing has changed. Now let's change the subject to something else. My personal life is just that. Personal."

Justin could feel the tension that seemed to surround the table and was relieved when Melanie came in carrying the turkey. He put the information he had learned about Brian away in his mind for the time being and focused on the dinner being placed in front of him. He'd have time to think about everything later.

Dinner was a pleasant affair. Once everyone stopped dwelling on Brian they had a good time. After dessert was finished and the kitchen was put back in order, Brian grabbed his and Justin's jackets, signaling it was time for them to leave. After saying their goodbyes to the group, Brian and Justin headed towards the door, only to be stopped in the entranceway by Gus.

"Dad, can I stay at the loft this weekend? We can rent some movies and just hang out." Gus asked.

"I don't think it's a good idea this weekend, Sonny Boy. Maybe next weekend." Brian replied, not wanting to announce to everyone that Justin was sleeping on his couch for the weekend.

Melanie realized what the situation was and stepped forward to help. "Gus, you know I need you here this weekend. We have to put up the tree."

"Oh, yeah. I forgot, Mom. Maybe Dad can come over and help us? Would you, Dad? You could even bring Justin?" Gus asked, excitedly.

Brian looked at his son and knew he wouldn't be able to refuse. "Sure, Gus. I'll help you put up the tree. I wouldn't miss it."

"What about you, Justin? Will you come and help, too?" Gus asked Justin.

Justin looked at Brian, who nodded his head in approval, before answering. "Sure Gus. I would love to come and help you."

"Yay! I can't wait. Mom, when are we putting up the tree?"

"How about Saturday afternoon? Does that sound good for you, Brian?" Melanie asked.

"We'll be here. Thanks for dinner, Mel." Brian said, kissing her cheek. He still couldn't believe how close they had become since Lindsay died.

"Thank you for having me, Melanie. It was nice to spend the day with your family." Justin offered.

"You are welcome here anytime, Justin." Melanie replied with a smile. She watched the two men walk out to the jeep and drive away, wondering how long Brian was going to be able to kid himself into thinking that Justin was just his patient.

Brian and Justin rode to the loft in a comfortable silence, both of them lost in thought. Once they made it inside and had the door locked, Brian confessed to talking to Melanie.

"Justin. I hope you don't mind, but I talked to Mel about your situation. She saw right through our story about your parents being away and asked for the truth. She's a lawyer so she might be able to help us decide what to do next. We are supposed to go over there on Sunday and talk to her. Maybe between the three of us we can come up with something. I made her promise not to say anything to the others so you don't have to worry about that. Is that okay?" Brian asked.

"That's fine, Brian. If you trust her, than I do too. I do have one question, though. Last night, while you were telling me about your past, why didn't you tell me you were gay?" Justin couldn't help but ask.

"I don't know. I guess I was just trying to keep some kind of professional distance between us. I know it seems pointless under the circumstances, but I was trying to protect you." Brian explained.

"Protect me? Protect me from what?" Justin asked, puzzled.

"From this." Brian replied, before taking Justin in his arms for a soft kiss.

Unfortunately, what started out as an innocent kiss soon turned passionate. Brian could hear Justin moan in response, but instead of pulling away, he deepened the kiss seeking entry into his warm mouth. Once Justin parted his lips, Brian plunged his tongue inside, reveling in the warmth he found there. After a few moments, Brian came to his senses and reluctantly pulled away, breathing heavy from their shared passion.

"Brian?" Justin asked, trying to gather his thoughts.

"See? Now you know what I was talking about. This can't happen again, Justin. Now I'm going to bed. Get some sleep and I'll see you in the morning." Brian replied, retreating to his bedroom. It wasn't far enough away from the blond, but it was the best he could do for the moment.

Justin watched Brian walk away. Relishing the moment, he couldn't seem to hold back a smile. "Good night, Brian," He called out to the quiet loft. "Sweet dreams."


End of part 5
12/21/03

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