Letting Go

Chapter 2

 

 


Brian was sitting on a plane headed for California before he really had time to think about the call he received from Justin. He’d never heard such anguish in his voice before and he knew without a doubt that no matter how things had turned out between them, Brian would do anything to help him. Justin had managed to calm himself down enough to tell Brian where he was, but other than that, Brian had no idea what was going on or why Justin was so upset. So many questions remained unanswered and the six hour flight seemed to be more like twelve.

The plane finally landed and Brian made his way to baggage claim, grabbing his bag and heading outside to hail a cab. He gave the driver the address Justin had given him and sat back, trying to keep the nervousness of the situation off his mind. He hadn’t seen Justin in three years, but the kid was never far from his thoughts. Three years; Justin wasn’t a kid anymore. He was a grown man with a life of his own, and there Brian was, getting ready to put himself right in the middle of it.

A short time later, the cab pulled up outside a two story Victorian home, and Brian took a deep breath before climbing out. He paid the driver and took his bag, making his way towards the front door. He took a deep breath, bracing himself for the reunion before knocking on the door. He was horrified by the sight of Justin when the door finally opened. Not only had Justin lost weight; a lot of weight, but he was a mess. His hair was too long and obviously unkept and there were dark circles under his eyes showing the sleep deprivation that he’d obviously been experiencing. His observation was interrupted when Justin began to speak.

“Brian…I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have called you. I…uh…I just…” Justin stammered as the tears began to fall once again.

Brian still didn’t know what had happened, but it was obvious that Justin was distraught and needed someone to lean on. Without saying a word, he dropped his bag and opened his arms, momentarily thrown off balance when Justin threw himself into his arms.

“Shhh…it’s okay. Everything is going to be alright,” Brian assured him, although seeing the state that Justin was in, he wasn’t very sure of that.

Justin stayed in Brian’s arms for a few more seconds, trying to gain some control before pulling back and wiping his eyes. “Sorry about that…ummm…why don’t you come in and I’ll show you where the guest room is so you can put your bag in there. Are you hungry? Tired? Would you like to lay down for awhile? You couldn’t have gotten much sleep.”

“Justin, calm down. Let me put my bag away and then maybe we can talk for a while,” Brian suggested, wanting to know whatever it was that had Justin so upset.

“Yeah…okay…follow me,” Justin said softly.

Brian followed Justin through the house and up the stairs, noticing how homey the place seemed, but also noticing the lack of order. It appeared as if no one had cleaned up in awhile and that worried Brian even more. Justin had never been a neat freak like Brian was, but he always was more organized that what he was seeing. After dropping his bag in the room, Brian followed Justin back down and they sat on the couch. He waited for Justin to say something and when it was obvious that he wasn’t going to, Brian began to question him.

“Justin, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

“I…uh…don’t know where to start,” Justin whispered.

“Why not start at the beginning?”

“Okay…Uh…not too long after moving out here, I met this guy at an art gallery. He was really nice and gay, too of course. We really hit it off and started seeing each other. Trevor was great. I told him all about you and the bashing and everything and he agreed to take things slow until I was ready for more. Six months later I moved in here with him and we were really happy.” Justin stopped and took a deep breath willing himself to go on.

Brian sat quietly, waiting for Justin to continue his story, and pushing away the sadness of hearing Justin talk about how he moved on.

“About seven months ago, Trevor was diagnosed with cancer. The doctors had hoped that it was detected early enough and he started Chemotherapy and Radiation. I took a leave of absence from work and school so I could help him through it all. It’s amazing how the cure usually does more damage than the disease. He got so sick…” Justin broke off with a sob, but when Brian reached for him, he pulled away. “I’m okay. Anyway, about two months ago, the doctors told him that the chemo wasn’t working. The cancer was spreading and there was nothing else they could do. They suggested he continue with the treatments and hope that he would eventually respond, but his refused. He said that he was tired of being sick all the time and just wanted his last days to be as enjoyable as possible. At first, he seemed to get a little better. He seemed stronger and more alive once all the toxins were out of his system, but it didn’t last long. He just slowly started drifting away. I spent all my time with him, praying for a miracle, but it never came. He…he…died two weeks ago.” Justin lost what little control he had and started sobbing, unable to go on.

Brian sat there in shock for a minute before gathering Justin up in his arms. Of all the possibilities that went through his mind as to what was going on in Justin’s life, losing his boyfriend to cancer wasn’t one of them. He continued to hold him for awhile until he heard the sobs turn into small hiccups as Justin started regaining some of his composure and pulled back.

“Justin, why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“I…don’t know. At first I really thought that Trevor was going to be okay, so I didn’t want to bother anyone. Then as he started getting worse…I knew that if I told my mother she would have dropped everything and come out here and I didn’t want that. I didn’t want anyone to interfere in the little bit of time we had left. The last couple of months were good, despite his illness. We were able to just be together; no hospitals, no treatments, no one around. It was just the two of us,” Justin explained sadly.

“Well, what about after? Jennifer knows that something’s wrong. Why haven’t you called her? I’m sure she would’ve come out here and helped you through the last couple of weeks.”

“I’m an adult, Brian. I wanted to be able to do this on my own. I owe it to Trevor to take care of what needs to be done. I wanted to be strong for him. I…just…I don’t know if I can. There’s so much that needs to be done. I have to pack up his things; decide what I’m keeping and get rid of the rest. I have to put the house on the market, but every time I try to start, I…just…it hurts, Brian. We were supposed to be together for a long time. Now he’s gone and I don’t know what to do. I…don’t…know…how…”

Fresh tears started rolling down Justin’s face as Brian sat there helpless to do anything about it. Justin was suffering and there wasn’t a damn thing Brian could do. He waited again for Justin to pull himself together before speaking.

“You can do this, Justin. You’re stronger than you think. Besides, I’m here now and I’ll help you,” Brian assured him, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to leave while Justin was so distraught.

“No Brian, that’s okay. You have Kinnetik to worry about. You don’t need to help me. I never should have called you in the first place. I’m sorry I dragged you out here. You can go back to your life and I’ll figure out something,” Justin said, feeling foolish for ever calling Brian. They hadn’t spoken in three years and Brian didn’t owe him anything.

Without replying, Brian reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, hitting number one on his speed dial and waiting for someone to answer.

“Hey, it’s Brian. I need to talk to Cynthia.” Brian saw the confused look on Justin’s face and smiled as he waited for Cynthia. “Hey Cyn, listen; I’m going to be out of town longer than I thought. I’m gonna need you and Ted to cover for me. I have my laptop so anything that needs my immediate attention can be sent to my email, but otherwise, I’ll be away for at least a couple of weeks. Call a meeting and let everyone know that the first person who doesn’t pull their weight while I’m gone is fired as soon as I get back.”

“Sure thing, Boss. Is everything okay?” Cynthia asked in concern. She’d worked for Brian a long time and never known him to just take off like that.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I’m just helping out an old friend. I’ll be in touch,” Brian replied before saying good bye.

Justin was stunned by Brian’s call. He never expected Brian to put his life on hold to help him and for the first time in two weeks he didn’t feel so alone. “Thanks Brian; you didn’t have to do that.”

“I know, I wanted to. Now why don’t we both go lay down for awhile. You look like you could use the sleep more than me. When we get up, we’ll get to work on what needs to be done, okay?”

“”Yeah, okay,” Justin replied, suddenly feeling very tired.

They walked upstairs together and parted ways at the guest room, each one lost in thought knowing that the next few weeks were going to be hard on both of them.

Justin walked into his room and shut the door. He made his way over to the bed and threw himself down, falling asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

Brian stood there in the guest room looking around and taking in his surroundings. It was decorated in a way that made a person feel really comfortable. On one wall there was a queen size bed with a blue comforter and some fluffy throw pillows in all different colors. On the adjacent wall was an oak dresser that looked as if it were an antique. On the wall across from the bed was an armoire that had a small television placed on it. The room definitely had a homey feel to it.

Brian walked over and sat on the bed, trying to absorb all of what Justin had shared with him. He thought about what Justin was going through and how he could make this easier for him. He lay back, stared up at the ceiling then slowly closed his eyes.

His mind replayed some of the good times he had with Justin and it just tore him up trying to imagine what he was going through, but regardless of how hard it was for him to make the trip, he was glad that he did.

When Brian rolled over and glanced at the clock on the night stand he was surprised to see that he had fallen asleep. As he lay in bed he wondered if Justin was able to get some sleep, and decided to go and check on him. As he walked over to Justin’s room and gently opened the door, he smiled to see Justin sleeping peacefully. With everything that Justin had gone through, it was such a wonderful sight to see.

As Brian reached the top of the stairs, he looked down and noticed the series of pictures hanging on the wall. With each step he took, he was given a glimpse into the life that Justin had been living and suddenly realized how much the younger man had moved on. He wasn’t the same naïve kid that followed him around back in Pittsburgh; he was a grown man with the life of his own.

He made his way into the living room and picked up a picture that was on one of the end tables. Justin and Trevor looked so happy together and Brian saw something in the picture that he hasn’t seen in three years …the reason why his family and friends called him Sunshine…his smile. It was an image that Brian had missed since they drifted apart and after Justin spent the last six months watching his lover die, Brian began to wonder if he would ever see that smile again.

Justin woke from his sleep and headed downstairs. He walked into the living room looking for Brian but he wasn’t there. He walked through the living room toward the front door and discovered Brian accepting a delivery at the front door.

“What are you doing?” Justin asked.

“Paying for dinner,” Brian responded. “I took the liberty of ordering Chinese, so I hope you still like what we used to order.”

“Yeah…of course I do,” Justin reassured Brian while he had a flashback of them sitting on the floor of the loft, enjoying their Chinese food.

Justin and Brian sat down on the floor next to the coffee table and immediately Justin started to open up all the food containers. Brian could tell he was starving and had not eaten for days. He looked so pale and thin. Brian sat there and watched as Justin piled up the food on his plate. For a second he thought about what he and Justin used to have and how he wished it could all go back to the way it was, but he knew he couldn’t keep torturing himself with those types of thoughts. He was there to help Justin.

“Thanks,” Justin said.

“For what…” Brian replied in confusion.

“For being here and helping me with all of this,” Justin explained. “You have no idea what this means to me, and the fact that you dropped your work….well, it’s just…..thank you.”

Brian looked at Justin and smiled. He wanted to say what was really on his mind but he knew that it wasn’t the time for that.

“I’m scared Brian,” Justin admitted in a shaky voice. “I don’t even know where to start; this is all so overwhelming.”

“Well what have you done so far?” Brian asks.

“Not too much really…all I have managed to get done was the funeral.”

“Okay, well I guess the next step would be to put the house on the market,” Brian suggested.

“I called a realtor the other day and we set up an appointment for tomorrow afternoon.”

“Then let’s wait until tomorrow and see what the realtor says and then we can move on from there. How does that sound?” Brian asked trying to ease Justin’s mind.

Justin looked up at Brian with such a sign of relief on his face and said, “That sounds good to me.”

“Let’s finish eating dinner, and then we can head to bed.” Brian said.

“Okay.”

“You know that you need to call your mother, right?”

“No…I hate to worry her about this. I know she’s just going to freak out and fly out here for me and I don’t want her doing that,” Justin insisted.

“She needs to know what’s going on. She’s your mother and she cares about you,” Brian said. “You’re so lucky to have a mother like that.”

“It’s been a few weeks since I’ve talked to her, so maybe I’ll just give her a call so she won’t worry, but I really don’t want to tell her what is going on……not quite yet,” Justin said to Brian, hoping that he wouldn’t try to force the issue.

“That’s fine….for now…as long as you at least call and talk to her.”

Brian leaned up against the sofa and watched Justin eat his rest of his dinner. He noticed how sad and lost he looked, almost like when they first met on the street corner back in Pittsburgh, and it tore at his heart.

Justin finished up the last bit of food on his plate while he thought about what he was going to say to his mom. He just didn’t want to worry her. He got up and went to grab both of their plates to take them in the kitchen when Brian grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Go call Jennifer and I’ll clean up this mess.”

Justin hesitated before putting his plate back down and walking over to the phone. He dialed his mother’s number and looked over at Brian. Brian gave him a reassuring smile which made him feel a little better about making the call.

“Hi mom, it’s me,” Justin said when he heard his mother’s voice. He sighed when she immediately began to question him on what was going on.

“Yes, I know….I’m fine mom, things have just been a little rough here for me lately….no, I’ll be okay…Brian is here with me so you don’t need to fly out.” Justin said as he paced back and forth from the kitchen to the living room. “Okay mom, I promise not to wait so long to call again…Trevor...um, well…things haven’t been the best around here regarding Trevor….no we’re not breaking up.” Justin said as tears started to roll down his face. “Mom, look I need to go….I’ll call you soon….I love you too…bye.” Justin hung up the phone and started to cry. Brian took him in his arms and Justin grabbed on to him tightly, needing the contact.

“Everything will be okay, I’m here now and I’ll take care of you,” Brian said trying to ease some of his pain. He felt so helpless and didn’t know what to do. He’d never seen Justin that way, so sad and distraught. Brian held on to him securely. He didn’t want to let go until he knew Justin was okay.

After a few minutes Justin calmed down and was able to release himself from Brian’s arms. He walked over to the sofa and sat down. Brian followed him and sat down with him, waiting for Justin to speak. He told Brian about the conversation with his mom and as hard as the conversation had been, he did feel a little bit better.

“Why don’t we go to bed? It’s been a long day and we’ll need to straighten up before the realtor gets here tomorrow,” Brian said as he stood up and placed his hand out in front of Justin.

Justin put his hand in Brian’s and allowed himself to be pulled off the sofa. They walked up the stairs and stopped at Justin’s door. Turning the doorknob, Justin said goodnight before going inside.

Brian went to his bedroom door and walked inside, shutting the door behind him. He stood there as if he was frozen and thought about everything that had happened that day. As he closed his eyes, a few stray tears started to roll down his face. Tears of sadness for a man who deserved so much better than what he was going through.

Debbie and Vic were sitting around the table discussing the latest gossip when they heard a knock on the door.

“I’ll get it. Why don’t you get us some more tea,” Debbie said as she made her way to the door. She was surprised to find Jennifer on the other side looking very upset. “Jenn, come on in.”

“I’m sorry to just stop by unannounced like this but I didn’t know where else to go,” Jennifer explained as she entered the house.

“Please Jenn, you’re welcome here anytime. Now why don’t you tell me what has you so upset? Is it Justin?”

“He finally called me today. He sounded so upset but didn’t tell me what was going on. Just mentioned that it had something to do with Trevor, but that’s not the worst of it,” she replied softly. “Brian’s there.”

“What the fuck is he doing there?” Debbie exclaimed.

“I’m not sure. Justin was very vague on the phone. He just told me that he was okay and that Brian was there so I didn’t need to fly out. Debbie, Brian is the last person Justin needs there; especially if he and Trevor are having trouble. I didn’t think that they were even in contact with each other.”

“They weren’t. As far as I know, Brian hasn’t talked to Justin since he left the Pitts. That little asshole,” Debbie spat. “If he had any part of the trouble with those boys, I’ll rip his balls off.”

Vic sat by listening to the two women putting Brian down for as long as he could stand it until they started making plans to fly to LA. Then he knew he needed to voice his opinion.

“Alright you two, that’s enough. Justin’s a big boy and knows how to take care of himself. I’m sure there’s a very good reason that Brian’s there; which is none of our business. Just like I’m sure that Brian has nothing to do with whatever’s going on with Trevor and Justin. As of last week, Brian still hadn’t spoken to Justin since he left. Whatever’s going on, it’s obvious that Justin felt he needed to contact Brian. Leave them be and wait to see what happens.”

“But Vic, the last thing my son needs is to have Brian in his life again, disrupting things. If Justin is in some kind of trouble he doesn’t need Brian there to make things worse,” Jennifer said.

“On the contrary; if Justin is in trouble, Brian might be exactly what he needs. It’s obvious that he doesn’t want either of his mothers there right now, and we all know that Brian would never do anything to hurt him. He loves him, even if he’ll never admit it. He’ll do everything in his power to help that kid. I’d stake my life on it.”

“Maybe I should give Justin a call,” Debbie said as she walked towards the phone.

“Sis, I’m warning you. Butting your nose where it doesn’t belong will just make things worse.”

Debbie sighed in resignation. “Oh alright, I’ll leave them alone. But if Justin doesn’t call us soon and let us know what’s going on, we’re getting on a plane and no one will be able to stop us,” Debbie insisted.

“Somehow I don’t doubt that,” Vic chuckled, causing Jennifer and Debbie to laugh along with him.

Brian woke up the next morning, surprised to find that he’d actually slept in a little bit. He quickly got up and jumped in the shower, wanting to be ready for when the realtor showed up. He knew that it was going to be another hard day for Justin. The poor guy was going to have to walk every inch of the house with the realtor so that she could come up with a good listing price. Once he was dressed, Brian walked downstairs, noticing that the room had been straightened. He continued on into the kitchen to find Justin seated at the table with a cup of coffee in front of him.

“Hey, how’d you sleep?” Brian asked as he pulled out a mug from the cabinet and poured himself some coffee.

“A little better, I guess. I think I actually made it three full hours before waking up. That’s a record for me these days,” Justin replied.

“Maybe you should go to the doctor and get something for that? It’s not good to go on such little sleep.”

“No, I’ll be alright. It’s just a matter of retraining myself. During the last couple of months I would wake up every hour or so to check on Trevor. He used to try and get me to sleep in the spare room so that he wouldn’t disturb me, but I refused. I wanted to be there for him. Now I wake up out of habit, looking for him. I’m sure in time I’ll get used to sleeping alone again,” Justin said sadly.

Brian didn’t have a response to that so he just leaned against the counter and drank his coffee. About twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang and Justin stood up to answer it.

“That must be her,” he said to Brian as he moved towards the door.

Brian watched as the realtor walked into the kitchen and laid her briefcase down on the table.

“Justin, how are you holding up?” she asked with sincerity. She’d felt so bad when she spoke to the poor man the other day. His pain was evident in his voice when he spoke of his partner’s death.

“I’m hanging in there,” Justin replied with a slight smile. “This is my friend Brian.”

“It’s nice to meet you Brian,” Cathy said as she shook Brian’s hand. “Okay, now I did some checking in the area to see what the some of the homes are going for around here. Let me just make sure that I have the basics that you gave me the other day before we start going from room to room. This is a three bedroom house with 2500 square feet of living space. There’s a living room, dining room, eat in kitchen, and a full attic, as well as an enclosed porch off the back. You also have central air and heating that runs on natural gas. All the windows and doors have been replaced in the last three years and you were told that the roof was replaced about five years ago. Does that all seem accurate to you to the best of your knowledge?”

“Yes, as far as I know.”

“Okay, let me just grab a pen and we can begin.”

Justin, Brian, and Cathy walked into every room of the house while she scribbled notes on every essential piece of information. Brian only half listened to them as he took in the décor before him. Trevor and Justin had a wonderful home and it saddened Brian to think about all that Justin was giving up. He not only lost the man he loved, but he was soon going to lose the place he’d called home for almost three years. The room that Brian found most intriguing was Justin’s studio. He looked around at the artwork that was haphazardly placed around and smiled as he saw Justin’s talent shining through each and every piece. He’d always known that the kid was talented, that was why he still had the sketch he’d purchased at the GLC art show, but his talent had grown so much over the years that Brian was even more impressed.

He watched Cathy and Justin walk back out of the studio and was about to follow when something caught his eye. It was a painting that was off in the corner, partially covered by a pile of blank canvases. Curiosity got the better of him and he walked over to get a better look. All he could see was part of an arm, but the cowry shell bracelet was a dead give away that the painting was of him. Glancing back at the doorway, Brian made sure that he was alone before pulling the painting out for a better look. It was indeed a painting of him, obviously done from memory, and made Brian wonder why Justin would have such a painting hiding behind canvases in his studio. He didn’t have time to dwell on it though, as he heard Justin and Cathy approaching the studio again. He quickly stashed the painting back in the corner and walked towards the door just as Justin’s appeared in the doorway.

“Hey, we were wondering where you went,” Justin smiled.

“I was just admiring your work. You’ve gotten even better over the years,” Brian said.

“Thanks, Trevor says that if…” Justin’s voice trailed off as he realized what he was saying. “Never mind. I was just about to show Cathy the back yard and porch.”

“Lead the way, Sunshine,” Brian replied without realized the slip of tongue in calling Justin by the nickname Debbie had given him years ago.

Justin noticed the slip, but didn’t comment on it as he led everyone downstairs and out the back door. He just wanted the tour to be finished so he could wipe the fake smile off his face. It was tiring putting on a happy face when his heart was in little pieces, but he was determined to get through the morning without breaking down in front of his realtor.

Once Cathy was sure that she had all the information she needed, she thanked Justin and Brian both and told Justin she would get back to him in a day or two with an asking price. Justin walked her outside and waved goodbye as she pulled away before going back inside and finding Brian in the living room.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked as Justin walked into the room.

“Yeah, I guess. It’s strange, you know? I thought I was going to live here forever and now…” Justin’s voice trailed off.

“You know,” Brian said as he walked over to stand in front of Justin. “You don’t have to sell the house. You could keep it and continue to live here. It’s your home, too.”

“I know, but Trevor’s in every corner. I just need to get away,” Justin replied sadly before changing the subject. “I’ve got to go to the supermarket and get some food for us. You want to go with me?”

“Are you sure you want to go now? There’s no rush. That’s what take out is for,” Brian said.

“Yeah, let’s go now. I need to focus on something normal right now.”

Brian understood and agreed. “Okay, let me just go grab my wallet and we can go.”

Once they were in the supermarket, Justin seemed a lot more relaxed and Brian found himself enjoying their excursion. They argued playfully over Justin’s choice of food, while Justin rolled his eyes at Brian’s obsession with carbs. By the time they were done, they had enough food to feed an army and Justin was smiling. It may not have been the smile that earned him his nickname, but it was a start. They walked to Justin’s car and loaded up the trunk before climbing inside. Justin stared the engine before turning towards Brian, unable to ignore the eyes that had been boring into him through most of their trip.

“What?”

“Huh?” Brian asked innocently.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Justin explained.

“It’s just nice to see you smiling, that’s all. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen it,” Brian admitted.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve had a reason to smile. Thanks again for coming out here. Things don’t quite seem so dark with you here.”

“Good, cause I’m here for as long as you need me,” Brian replied.

Justin smiled at Brian as he put the car in gear and started for home.

Once they reached the house, Brian and Justin unloaded the car and started to put the groceries away in the kitchen. When all the groceries were away, they went into the living room and laid down on opposite ends of the “L” shaped couch, relaxing in the comfortable silence. Soon they both drifted off to sleep

After about an hour, Justin woke up and went into the kitchen to grab a light snack. The noise that Justin made woke Brian up so he got up and walked into the kitchen to get some water.

“You hungry?” Justin asked.

“Actually I am. What did you have in mind?”

“I could make us something now that I have some food in the house.”

“How about we go out for dinner…your choice,” Brian said.

“Okay, well there’s this great Italian restaurant that Trevor and I used to go to, if that’s okay with you,” Justin mentioned hesitantly.

Brian smiled at Justin and said, “That sounds perfect, let’s get out of here.”

They arrived at the restaurant and walked over to where the host was and asked for a table for two. A few minutes later the host escorted them to their table. The restaurant had a very warm feeling about it. Throughout the place, there were colors of red and blue, with some accents of gold.

The waiter came over and asked for their drink selections. Brian asked for their best bottle of red wine and the waiter nodded and walked off to retrieve the order. Brian looked at Justin and noticed that he didn’t appear to be as worn down as the day before. He was glad to see that some of the stress had eased.

“This is a nice place,” Brian stated while he looked around the room.

“Yes it is…we used to eat here every couple of weeks. It was our way of treating ourselves,” Justin said as he played with his fork feeling uneasy about the situation.

Brian looked to his left and saw a man walking toward their table. He thought at first that he was part of the staff but as he got closer it appeared that wasn’t the case.

“Justin,” the man greeted angrily.

Justin looked up in horror as he recognized the voice. “Oh hey Philip, how’re you doing?”

“Two weeks after the funeral and you’re already dating?” Philip snapped, his voice dripping with accusation.

“Philip…you’ve got it all wrong. This is a friend of mine who came in from Pittsburgh to help me get some things together.” Justin looked at Brian and saw how upset he was by the confrontation.

“Hey…I’m Brian.”

“I don’t care who you are….Brian…this is none of your business,” Philips said before turning back to Justin. “Trevor loved you Justin, and I thought you loved him, too. Why didn’t you tell us what was going on? We should’ve been there for him.”

“He asked me not too! Don’t you think I wanted to tell our friends? He made me promise not to say anything and I loved him so much that I had to accept his wishes,” Justin exclaimed.

“Apparently we weren’t your friends or you would’ve told us. Instead you kept it to yourself and never gave any of us a chance to say goodbye. I’ll never forgive you for that,” Philip spat as he turned around and stormed back to his table.

Brian looked at Justin and saw how upset he was. No wonder he felt so alone now that Trevor was gone. All of his friends were angry with him and Brian wondered how his friends could treat him like that.

“Do you want to talk about it,” Brian asked Justin who was looking down at the table.

“Not really,” Justin said as he excused himself from the table and walked to the bathroom.

Once he was inside, he leaned on the sink and looked at his reflection in the mirror, watching as the tears ran down his face. The pain was so great that he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to stop crying. He turned the faucet on and splashed some water on his face, hoping to stop the tears. Grabbing for a paper towel he continued to look in the mirror hating the sad eyes staring back at him.

Brian was so confused by what he just witnessed. He wasn’t sure if he should follow Justin into the bathroom or just give him a few minutes alone. He opted to give him some space but knew he had to do something. Being the person that he was, Brian decided that he wouldn’t let Philip couldn’t get away with his vicious behavior. He stood up and walked over to Philip’s table, really to make the asshole pay for ruining their evening and hurting Justin.


End of part 2
05/01/05

 

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