Falling Down the Primrose Path

Part 1

Thanks to Simon for agreeing to let me do this and giving suggestions.  To my beta Gayle and to the medical people of the Moonshadow Tribe for helping me with that part of the story.<bg>

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Simon's Lead In -

"You were always first rate, you know that. We were good."

"But he's better?"

"He's not better than you are, he's just better for me, Justin, that's all. And I think I'm good for him." He seemed so sad when he said it. "After a while, I don't think we would have worked anymore. And then it would have gotten terrible for both of us."

"Instead it was just terrible for me."

"It will pass; it will fade. I'll fade." He made a move to touch Justin's cheek in a small caress, but pulled back before his hand made contact. "You can have anyone you want, Justin-you're amazing and talented and smart and you're beautiful. You can have anyone. You'll see."

His answer was a thin smile.

"You'll clean up your act?"

"Does it matter to you if I do?" It was a real question wanting a real answer.

"It matters. You matter." That was it, no appeal. Brian wouldn't change his mind. Justin knew that was the final nail for them together. It wasn't so much that Brian would never take him back, it was simply that he'd found someone he wanted more. Justin had been shifted, as far as Brian was concerned, to the group of friends who made up his family. He was no longer more than that and he had no choice but to accept it or leave. Of course, Brian was fiercely loyal to his family.

He nodded. "All right. I'll do you proud."

This time Brian did let his hand cup the boy's cheek, like you would pat a small child who'd gotten an A on a math test. He smiled, glad that the problem had finally been dealt with. "Call if you need anything. You know that I mean that. Anything- call me." Justin nodded as Brian turned walked away and down the stairs at the end of the hall, he listened to the footsteps disappear.

"But you're wrong, Brian. I can't have you."

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Now on to my departure and change of direction to the story…

Justin watched Brian walk away from him and felt himself get angry. What right did Brian have to come and tell him what to do? Justin went back into class and excused himself. He was too angry and upset to continue. Walking to the nearest bar he ordered a drink and thought about the conversation he had just had.

After almost eight months, he comes to his school, pulls him out of his class and starts touting about how he still cares what happens to him but that he loves Steve and isn't coming back. That he wants Justin to pull himself together and finish school. Well fuck him Justin thought slamming down his empty glass.

Picking up his bag, he went home to decide just what it is that he's going to do. Walking into his apartment, he looked around. This wasn't home. He didn't have a home any longer. Brian had taken that away from him. Justin reached for the phone.

Over the next few days, Justin made his plans and within two weeks, stood looking around his apartment to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything. Turning, Justin locked the door and went down to the car he had recently purchased. Loading the last box, he dropped his keys in the manager's box and left.

Justin never once looked back as he left New York behind him. As he drove, he went over the past three weeks in his head. Brian had said that he still cared about him yet after his talk with Justin at school he hadn't called him once to see if things had gotten better.

With the semester just starting, Justin had easily withdrawn and gotten the money that Brian had used to pay his tuition. It was the last thing he was ever going to take from Brian Kinney.

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Almost a year to the day of the break up, a very drunk and wasted Justin stumbled out of a bar somewhere in Colorado. As he leaned against the wall trying to get his bearings, he felt a hand land on his shoulder. Opening his eyes, he saw a fairly attractive man grinning at him.

"I've been trying to get your attention all night." The man said.

Justin smiled slightly. "Oh yeah? Well you mustn't have tried too hard."

"You want to go somewhere? We could go get some coffee somewhere to sober us up." The grinning man said.

Justin shook his head and leaned forward again. "Nope, I'd rather you just took me home and fucked me."

Laughing the man wrapped his arms around Justin's shoulders. "Sounds good to me. By the way, my name's Peter."

Justin laughed and shook his head. "Don't do names." He said but stopped when they arrived at the man's vehicle. It was a black jeep.

Peter stopped also. "Nice, huh. Just what you need here in the mountains. I have an SUV for the winter."

Justin nodded. "You must do pretty good if you have both."

"I'm a doctor. So what is your name?" He said.

"Oh yeah…I'm Justin." He said as he moved toward the jeep. "So…do you live far?"

Peter laughed. "Not too far."

Justin got in and closed the door. As Peter got in, Justin leaned back against the seat and closed his eyes. Justin felt the jeep start and tried to block out the memories he had of him and Brian in the jeep during happier times. He knew that he was coming down and wasn't ready yet.

Turning to Peter, he asked. "You got anything? I could use a little more of a buzz."

Peter reached into his pocket and pulled out a couple of tabs. "Here you go. The best money can buy."

Justin grabbed the tabs and quickly popped them into his mouth. Sitting back he waited for them to take effect. When they did, Justin opened his eyes and smiled at Peter. "That is good shit."

Peter laughed and popped another tab himself. "I told you."

Justin looked around. "So how soon before we get to your place?"

Peter looked around. "Not too long. As you can tell by all the trees, it's a little bit up the mountain."

Justin nodded. Just then headlights flashed as they came toward them. Justin laughed at the swerving lights, thinking what an idiot the driver was. The next thing he knew there were loud crashing noises, squeals, screams, and he was flying through the air. That was the last thing he remembered.

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