Remorse

I can't believe that bastard left me hanging! I told him I needed a shower, but oh, no - he wanted me right then and there. Then he gets up, tells me to shower, and bails on me! FUCKER! The last thing I wanted was for him to smell Ethan on me. I'm so busted.

I waited a few seconds, then got up. I thought he made me feel shitty when I forgot to set the alarm on the loft last year. That was nothing - this felt so much worse. He knows - he may not know Ethan, but in his own Brian way, he knows we fucked and kissed.  Hell, he knew I'd kissed that virgin at Daph's party - that's why I've been showering all week!

Hopping in the shower finally, I braced myself for Brian joining me to finish what he started. He never got in. I got out of the shower figuring Brian would be on the bed. He wasn't there. Shit. Fuck - I really fucked up this time. He doesn't even want me now.

I wrapped a towel around my hips, and went to look for him. He was sitting at his desk pretending to work. I can tell when he's really working, and when he's just bullshitting around so he doesn't have to talk to me. Sensing my presence, he looked up at me, dismissing me with his eyes, then went back to the task at hand.

Well, I guess he doesn't want anything to do with me tonight. I went back in the bedroom, took off the towel, and got in bed. My body was still humming from Brian's kisses - I was hard as a rock, and frustrated as hell. Damn - I've never been cock-teased before. I'd heard about it, especially from the jocks at St. James, but never dreamed I'd experience it. I never imagined Brian would do that to me. I lay in the dark, torn between wanting to jack off, and wanting Brian to do it for me.

Two hours later, Brian finally got in the bed. I looked at him, expecting him to say something, anything - if not to reassure me, then to punish me. Brian rolled over on his side, his back facing me. Fuck. I curled up in a ball, and let the tears slide down. He's forgiven me for a lot of shit, but he'll never forgive me for making a fool out of him.

Return to Mothafunkybat's Fanfiction