Soon

Author's Note: Part of the Drabble Remix challenge from the gil_loves_greg livejournal community. The drabble remixed “Again” is the quoted before the story.
~~~~~~~~~~
-Again-
He swore never to be hurt again.
Three heartbreaks were enough—distant parents; two former lovers. When he came
to Vegas he played the flirting game but decided Never Get Too Close and
certainly Never Sleep With Coworkers. Thankfully, Vegas was full of sexy,
willing bodies ready for a night or two.
No problem; only room for friendships.
Never Again, he said after breaking his first rule—swapping spit with his boss
was Too Close.
Never Again, he said, crawling out of bed after Sleeping With His Boss.
“Come back to bed,” Gil says.
He recognizes he’s broken the rules.
***
If he so wished, there were several excuses Gil Grissom could recite for his
poor social skills. After his father’s death, he was essentially raised by a
single mother. His mother’s hearing failure resulted in a house that tended to
be silent on most days. He never learned the type of social chatter that was
designed solely to fill up the quiet. His curiosity and its particular
expression didn’t lend to sharing.
Not if a young man wanted to avoid visits to the school psychiatrist.
When Gil was invited to his high school prom, the invitation confused him. He
stared at the brave young woman, a familiar face from his physics class, until
she blushed and turned away, stammering an apology.
Hours later, gloved hands shifting a drift of seagull feathers to isolate the
broken section of wing, he brought his head up as he realized she’d been asking
him out. Soon, he promised her memory. Someday soon he’d explain that shock, not
a lack of interest, had caused his lack of response. He’d thought they made
fairly decent lab partners.
Why would anyone want to disrupt that with a romantic entanglement?
When he remembered his promise to that young lady, he had just received her
wedding announcement. She was marrying the student government president. They
were holding the nuptials during the graduating class’ five year reunion.
Gil turned back to the research for his Master’s thesis. Soon, he promised the
pile of documents on his desk. Someday soon, he would send in his polite refusal
to attend such a gathering of former classmates. He’d find an appropriate card
wishing the happy couple all his best to accompany the decline.
If a faint part of him wondered how nice it would be to come home to someone who
shared or at least tolerated his interests, it was ignored.
The first time Gil slept with a woman without convincing himself he loved her,
he was drunk. Practically a college ritual, the experience left him feeling
shamed. His years to watch may have been limited, but he remembered how dearly
his parents loved each other.
When she approached him weeks later to tell him she was pregnant, he was shamed
by his response. Rather than immediately promising to ‘do the right thing’, he
froze. Staring at her face, he found himself categorizing the indicators of
sleepless nights and stress rather than answering.
Her bitter laugh was somehow sweet. She didn’t want the reply he couldn’t find
the strength within to give. She wanted his help finding someone who would get
rid of it. Besides, she spat with a vindictiveness that somehow relieved him, it
probably wasn’t even his. Denying his relief, Gil managed to nod.
Soon, he knew. Someday soon he’d find that person meant just for him.
When he finally graduated with his doctorate, his mother smiled more brightly
than most of his fellow graduates. She asked, fingers dancing and eyes
sparkling, about the cute blond who’d hugged him so spontaneously.
Still shocked that Steven had grabbed him like that in public, Gil blushed. His
hand stumbled over the response that he was too embarrassed to give aloud. ‘He’s
a guy.’
‘So?’ her nails drawled in reply.
Soon, Gil promised himself. Someday very soon he would take a long look at why
that particular expression brought him such a feeling of relief.
Moving to Las Vegas was a difficult choice to make. His mother, with whom he’d
always been close, was several hours away. It was with determination that she
learned to use the developing computer applications.
Soon, he promised. He would write shortly after his arrival in the other state.
Immediately, she demanded with a mother’s care. With a laugh she didn’t hear,
Gil enfolded her in his arms. If his mind catalogued the frailty of her bones,
the paper texture of her skin, he ignored it. She was all he had and he loved
her dearly.
Someday soon he would make sure she knew.
Gil enjoyed working for the Las Vegas Police Department. Here, in a city far
stranger than he could express, his own particular quirks seemed
inconsequential. Comfortable on the nightshift, he was happy to teach what he
knew to all who passed through his hands. In turn, they taught him.
But they never seemed to understand that even the darkest case didn’t need to
consume your soul. They didn’t understand how he could classify the beetles from
inside a corpse and be found less than an hour later snacking on chocolate ants
in his office.
He nodded to his contemplative reflection in the restroom mirror. Soon. Someday
soon he’d find a way to teach even the most dedicated among them that it was
okay to enjoy their work.
When he first met Greg Sanders, he found it almost inconceivable to match the
slick resume with the chipper young man. The CV was nearly perfect, sparkling in
its exact match to their needs.
He asked, but Greg never really gave an answer as to why he wanted to live and
work in Las Vegas. Then again, Gil could respect silence. Just as he could
respect, and silently encouraged, the personality that quickly made its mark on
the lab.
Soon, Gil resolved. Someday soon he’d let Greg in on his secret. Where Gil had
failed to teach it, Greg had taught the others… fun.
The difficulty in leading Greg to his certification as a CSI was a particularly
thorn in Gil’s side. Finally achieved, he’d handed the young man off to the
others to celebrate.
Later, as their paths crossed in the locker room, Gil suddenly flashed back to
the sight of Greg’s grin skating on the edges of a champagne glass.
And soon was no longer enough.
Greg had glanced up from his seat on the bench in surprise at hearing Gil’s
voice. He pulled the earbuds playing a soft ska version of ‘Chariots of Fire’
from his ears, waiting on the likely forthcoming warning. Then, confused, he was
still as Gil cupped his head and lowered his face until their lips barely
touched.
It shocked both of them as the emotion behind that scant touch built. Until,
with a faint whimper, Greg let his lips fall apart just barely with a whisper of
breath. Gil’s fingers tensed, drawing the younger man up from the bench and the
clench changed from hesitant to hasty.
They separated, panting and slick-mouthed. Gil could only watch as Greg fled
with panicked eyes. Straightening his shirt and gathering his things with
scattered thoughts, Gil decided he had to find Greg soon. He had to explain that
he hadn’t meant to attack him like that.
Unsure exactly what he’d meant, Gil left in a vague daze. It was days later
before he realized he hadn’t yet spoken to Greg. More importantly, Greg was
still eyeing him suspiciously at odd moments.
“Have breakfast with me,” Gil finally almost-insisted after cornering his
employee in the empty break room.
“Is that,” Greg swallowed hard, “an invitation?”
“No.” Gil shook his head, then frowned. “Yes.” He paused. “We
need to talk.”
Greg nodded, eyes widening as he turned away to the coffee-maker. “My car's in
the shop.”
“I’ll give you a ride,” Gil countered.
Coughing, his cheeks flushing under Gil’s sharp glance, Greg simply nodded his
compliance.
It wasn’t until much later, shift completed and corpses identified, that Gil’s
destination was questioned. He pulled into the street parking in front of his
condo, the vehicle still idling.
“I thought you said breakfast,” Greg objected.
“Do you really want to have this conversation in public?” Gil rebutted smoothly.
He pretended he couldn’t hear Greg’s reply over the sound of the SUV doors
closing.
“I don’t want to have this conversation at all.”
The intended talk was delayed beneath their mutual hesitation. First it was
coffee, then the pondering of actual food to follow up their day. Neither
volunteering a food for delivery, since Gil hadn’t actually intended to cook,
Greg browsed the extensive collection of books lining Gil’s shelves.
Watching the younger man, Gil found himself at ease with another person’s
presence in his home. It was the first time, almost ever, that he wasn’t
counting the minutes until the intruder would leave. As a revelation, it was
both minor and all-consuming.
“Griss,” Greg started to speak, turning back to the room. He stopped, realizing
that Grissom had moved much closer in his silence.
Standing nearly toe to toe, they simply stared at each other for a long moment.
Gil lifted a hand that ghosted in a whisper of touch alongside Greg’s head. The
younger man held his breath as Gil leaned in, then cursed as he grabbed his soon
to be lover.
A particularly awkward dance led them across the home. Gil, mutely guiding, let
Greg decide their pace on the path to his bedroom. They struggled through the
steps across his carpet. Then, smoothly, they transitioned to a smooth rhythm.
Sated, Gil watched as Greg’s calm dissolved as fast as his strength during
orgasm. The younger man leapt from his supine position against the sheets,
looking anywhere but at his boss.
“Greg,” Gil spoke softly, prompting him to face him. “Come back to bed.”
“I,” Greg started, seeming not to immediately notice that he was still nude from
their lovemaking. “I don’t do this,” he finally exclaimed. Clenched hands clawed
his hair into an even further mess.
Gil could only smile at the sight, finally knowing that soon was now. “Greg.” He
said it only to taste the syllable, but the man seemed to be waiting for
something else.
The pain in Greg’s eyes finally drew Gil from his sprawl across the sheets. He
stood, crossing the room like a horse whisperer to a skittish colt. Reaching
out, he caressed the skin of Greg’s bicep with the gentle fingers he used to pet
his tarantula.
“Come back to bed.”
And something clicked in Greg’s gaze. With a deep breath, he did just that…
pulling Gil behind him.
Finis
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