Moving Forward
Part 2
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Brian quickly got settled in his new house. He shopped for new furnishings and accessories for his home. He had to admit there was an immense satisfaction to decorating his house. When he bought the loft, he had a decorator do the interior, he didn’t do any of the furnishing himself, maybe that’s why it always felt so cold when he lived there alone. When Justin lived with him the loft took on a more homey feel, but that was because Justin’s shit was usually all over the place. After he moved out, the loft returned to its former, cold state. Even the new pieces he added after Justin moved out did nothing to recreate the warmth that had existed when his blonde lover had lived there.
After completing the house, Brian decided to start working on the guest house. It was really a large pool house, very spacious. Brian thought about fixing it up to rent out. He didn’t need the money, but for some reason he knew he had to make the pool house livable. He furnished it and had contractors make the necessary adjustments so a phone line, cable, electricity and water service could be turned on. He even had a separate entrance built so the guest house could be accessed from the back. This way whoever lived there could come and go without disturbing Brian by going through the house or the yard. He was immensely satisfied with the results.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
“Justin honey, why can’t you have dinner with me? I haven’t seen you in weeks.”
Justin rolled his eyes as he spoke to Jennifer on the phone. Hanging out with Debbie and the queer patrol had elevated her to a Drama Princess in Training. “I told you mom, I have to work at the bar tonight and I have some homework to finish before my shift starts.”
“Justin, I’m really worried about you working so hard.”
“Mom, I’m fine. I’m getting good marks in all my classes, and you know why I need to work the two jobs.”
“I don’t know why you won’t let me help you. That’s what mothers do for their kids.”
“I know Mom, and I appreciate the offer, but I also know money is tight for you and Molly.”
Jennifer rolled her eyes while talking to her stubborn son, but she knew he was right. Craig didn’t provide one penny more than he was required by the courts, and she was always counting her pennies, but that didn’t stop her from worry about her first born. “Ok, sweetie, but please, if you find yourself in a jam, promise you will ask me for help.”
“I promise mom.”
Jennifer hung up the phone and shook her head sadly. She was very worried about Justin. He had a tendency to push himself until some outside force intervened to stop him. She found herself thinking about Justin and Brian. Her opinion of the ad-exec had changed drastically since she had helped him sell the loft and buy the new house. She reluctantly admitted that she never worried about Justin like this when he had been with Brian. Brian took care of Justin as well, if not better, than she ever did. She knew he paid Justin’s tuition, even though Justin had never told her. What surprised her was that he continued paying even after they had broken up. It must have taken some pretty fancy maneuvering on the older man’s part to get Justin to accept his help. She figured that was another reason Justin was pushing himself so hard to make ends meet. Her son had a lot of pride, and she knew it must be hard for him to continue to accept Brian’s help after he left the older man for Ethan. But she still couldn’t help but worry.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Justin was exhausted. He was in his studio on campus finishing a project that was due the next day. He had worked until two at Murph’s the night before, and had an eight-o’clock class. His schedule was beginning to wear him down, but he had no choice. Since getting his own place, his expenses had skyrocketed. Between his job at the diner and the bar, he was able to squeak by each month, but he didn’t have much left over. He had no social life, but that was fine. He really didn’t feel like hanging out at Babylon or Woody’s, he was too afraid of running into Brian.
Brian. He hadn’t seen his ex-lover since those two fateful encounters a few months before. That was fine with him. He didn’t want to see him. Seeing Brian only reminded Justin of the huge mistake he had made in leaving. He had been so stupid getting caught up in Ethan’s romantic bullshit. He didn’t love Ethan, he just loved the idea of what he was offering. Justin did want all that, but he wanted it from Brian. He knew there was no way he could go crawling back to Brian after Ethan left. Justin was not a glutton for punishment, and he knew the ad-exec would really give it to him if Justin had dared to try and crawl back.
So Justin sucked it up, found a place to live and another job. He was really shaken up by the two encounters with Brian. Obviously his feelings for the older man were still there, strong as ever, but he had to surpress them, he would never be Brian’s lover again. He was really thrown when Michael brought Brian into Murph’s. The look on Michael’s face told him that he had not planned it, so Justin didn’t get mad. He just gave them a couple of drinks and then sent them on their way. He figured Brian would be anxious to hit the back room.
Justin looked at the piece he was working on. The assignment was to create an abstract piece about his family. He unconsciously used his Liberty Avenue family for inspiration. Although he never worked much in abstracts, he found himself immensely pleased with the piece. His studio partner, Tom, was also working. The two got along, and more importantly they didn’t get in each other’s way. Justin was studying his canvas, trying to decide what to do next, when everything went black.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Brian was sitting in his office playing with a pen. He was so bored. All of his accounts were moving forward smoothly, that his presence at the office was ceremonial at best. Cynthia buzzing him drew him out of his thoughts, “Brian there a Jane Samuels on line one for you.”
“Who the fuck is Jane Samuels?”
“She says she’s from PIFA.”
Shit, Justin, “Put her through. Brian Kinney.”
“Mr. Kinney, my name is Jane Samuels, I’m the assistant dean at Pittsburgh Institute of Fine Arts.”
“What can I do for you Ms. Samuels?”
“I have you listed as the emergency contact for Justin Taylor, one of our students.”
Oh my god, stay calm, “Is something wrong?”
“Mr. Taylor collapsed in his studio today, he was taken to Pittsburgh Memorial.”
“What happened, is he ok?”
“I’m sorry Mr. Kinney, I don’t have any more information, I just needed to notify you.”
“Thank you Ms. Samuels,” Brian quickly severed the connection, “Cynthia, cancel the rest of my day.”
With that, Brian raced out of the office.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Brian broke about a hundred traffic laws racing to the hospital, he was surprised he didn’t cause an accident. He couldn’t think about anything except getting to Justin. From the moment he got the call from the assistant dean, he had been running through every worst case scenario he could think of. He pulled up to the hospital and raced inside. He went to the emergency room admitting desk. “Justin Taylor please.”
The nurse looked at the frazzled man in front of her, “Are you family?”
“I’m his … uh … partner.”
The nurse glared at him coolly, “I’m sorry, I can’t give any information to anyone but family members.”
Brian was pissed, he remembered going through this with Melanie, “Look he is covered under my medical insurance, surely that can allow for some kind of cooperation from your hospital, since that is how you will be getting paid.”
Resigned, the nurse decided to help, looking over he charts, “He’s in exam room six, just down the hall.”
Brian raced down the hall, and saw the doctor leaving the exam room. “Excuse me doctor, how is Justin Taylor?”
The doctor looked the man up and down, “He’s fine, I was just getting ready to release him. He collapsed mostly from exhaustion and a little dehydration. He needs to slow down his schedule, but other than that, he’s fine.”
“Thank you doctor,” Brian turned and walked into the exam room. Justin was sitting on the exam table, putting on his shoes. His eyes showed his surprise when Brian walked in.
“What are you doing here?”
“It seems I was still listed as your emergency contact in your file at school.”
“Oh shit, I’m sorry, I never thought to change it. You didn’t need to rush down here, I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine! You fucking collapse in the middle of the day from exhaustion? Does that sound like fine to you?”
“Brian, it’s no big deal, I just need to get some more rest.”
“And when are you going to do that? Between your two jobs, or your classes, or babysitting Gus, or working on ‘Rage’ and god knows what else you’ve been up to?”
“Look, it’s not your concern …”
“Well that’s where you’re wrong, I happen to have a financial stake in your success at school, so it is my concern.” Brian saw Justin’s shoulders slump at that remark. Brian knew immediately that this was part of the reason that Justin was pushing himself so hard. He kneeled in front of his former lover, and looked into his eyes, “Look, you can stay with me, so you don’t have to worry about rent.”
“Brian, are you totally fucked? What, I can sleep on the couch at the loft, maybe a blow up mattress?”
“I moved.”
“What?”
“I moved a few months ago, and I have a guest house at my new place. I was thinking of renting it out anyways. You can come and go as you please, we don’t have to see each other.”
“Brian, I can’t, I owe you too much already.”
“Look, you can help me with the lawn maintenance or something. I pay for it anyway as part of my mortgage payment, so it’s no real imposition if you use it or not.”
“That’s not the point and you know it.”
“Look, come over, check it out, and decide then.”
Brian could tell Justin was contemplating the offer, “Ok.”
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
They drove to Brian’s house in silence. A few times, Brian had been tempted to break the silence, but when he looked over at Justin, staring out the window deep in thought, Brian decided to hold his tongue. They arrived at the house, and Brian went around to open the passenger side door. This sudden show of chivalry surprised Justin, but he said nothing.
Brian led Justin into the house and headed straight to the back door. As Justin followed Brian, he took note of the house. It was completely different from the loft. Brian was no longer living in his sexual lair, but in a true home. The furnishings were warm and inviting. It was the type of place he had always dreamed of living with Brian in.
Brian opened the door to the backyard. Justin took in the surroundings. There was a large pool with a diving board and slide. On the concrete deck were dozens of pool toys, including toddler size water wings. He must have Gus over to play in the pool. This surprised Justin more than anything. Obviously Brian had considered his son when picking out his new home. He caught a few snippets of Brian’s relationship with his son when he would babysit. Gus loved to babble about his Daddy, but Justin never imagined anything like this. Brian unlocked the door to the guest house and gestured for Justin to come inside.
The house was really a large studio. It had been partially furnished and divided by screens. There was a small kitchenette and a small bathroom. In the back, sectioned off by screens was a bedroom area with large closets. The majority of the space was left open. Justin could picture his easel and art supplies filling up one corner. There was plenty of room for a sofa and entertainment center. Near the kitchen was another area that could serve as a dining room.
Brian watched as Justin looked around. He hadn’t admitted it until now, but when he was having the contractors work on the space, he had it set up to be a home for an artist. And that artist was Justin. He had never thought about how he would get the young man to move in, but it looked like fate had intervened. Justin walked into the back and examined the bedroom area.
“It’s all set up. Everything is wired for a phone, cable tv, internet access, all I would need to do is turn it on.”
“Brian, I don’t know …”
Brian interrupted him by pulling him back outside. He led the younger man around the back of the guest house. Justin could see that it was set up for private access. “We don’t have to see each other Justin. You can come and go through this back entrance. I only have one key, so it would be your place. Before you jump into your speech about being indebted to me, hear me out. There’s no reason you should be living like you do. Your family should be taking care of you. You should be able to go to school and cultivating your talent without worrying how you’re going to pay for the roof over your head. I feel partly responsible for the fact that you don’t. So please, let me help you. You won’t owe me anything, I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t want to do this for you. The only condition is that you have to quit your job at that bar and cut back your hours at the diner. I know you need spending money, and working part time at the diner should cover that. I want you to focus on your schooling. You’re going to be a famous artist someday, and now is the time to concentrate on that.”
Justin looked at Brian, and almost didn’t recognize him. He looked like Brian, but he was different. He was softer, the hard edge had been replaced by a relaxed, peaceful demeanor. He made his decision. “Ok Brian, I’ll move in here.”
“Good, do you have a lease that you need to get out of.”
“No, I rent month to month.”
“Jesus Justin, that only makes it more expensive,” seeing the clouds cover his baby’s expression broke his heart, “so you can move out by the end of next week?”
Justin nodded, “Yeah, I don’t need to give much notice.”
“Do you need some help?”
“No, my friend Mike has a truck, I’m sure we can do it this weekend.”
Brian nodded stiffly. “Well, I’ll leave you to look around a little bit more. Let me know when you’re ready to leave.”
Securing that promise from Justin, Brian left him alone, and walked back to the house.