Finally

Chapter 3

“Sir.  Sir.” 

Justin felt a gentle hand on his shoulder and he sat up running a hand through his hair.  “Huh?”

“I’m sorry, sir,” said the nurse who was standing next to him.  “I’m Irma, the day shift nurse,” smiled the older woman.  “Eileen said you were sleeping so soundly that she left you alone all night, but I do really need to have you step out so we can change his bandages and the doctor can do his exam.”

Justin nodded and looked up at Brian, who was sound asleep.  “Yeah, sure, I’ll be right outside.  Thanks.”  He leaned over to kiss Brian’s cheek before he got up to leave.

“I think Brian has some more visitors out there as well,” Irma smiled.  “He’s been very popular.”

Justin smiled and left the room, and after a pit stop at the public restroom, made his way out of the double doors and was immediately pulled into a hug. 

“Sunshine!”

“Hey, Deb, it’s good to see you,” he said a little breathlessly as she held him tightly. 

“My turn.” 

Justin smiled and looked up to see his own mother who gently pried him from Debbie’s grip and pulled him into her own comforting arms.  “Hey, Mom,” Justin choked out and was completely mortified to find himself blubbering like a little baby.

“Oh, Justin,” his mom rubbed his back, and she and Deb both led him to the couch in the waiting area where they sat him down in between them, and just let him cry for a little bit.  Finally Jennifer handed her son a box of tissues.  “Honey, have you been here all night?  When was the last time you slept?”

Justin wiped his face and blew his nose.  “I’m so sorry.”  He dabbed at his face again.  “Ben dropped me off here from the airport, but I did get some sleep.  The night nurse let me stay with him and I slept in the chair all night, which I think is why my back feels like hell.”  He reached back to rub the offending body part.”

“You need a real bed and some real sleep, Sunshine,” Deb scolded him.

“I can’t leave.  I haven’t even spoken to Brian.  I have to talk to him, even just for a minute.  Just so I can see…see that he’s going to be okay.”  His eyes teared up again.  “Shit.  What if he doesn’t even want me here?”

“Oh, Sunshine, of course he does.”  Deb patted his knee.  “That bastard has wanted you from day one, and he‘s never stopped.”  Jennifer and Justin both shot her matching sardonic looks.  “Well, he has,” Deb insisted.  “Even if he didn’t always realize it.”

“I understand how you feel, sweetheart,” Jennifer replied, rubbing Justin‘s back.  “But you won’t be any good to him if you make yourself sick.”

“I’m staying, mom.”

Jennifer recognized the stubborn set of Justin’s jaw and sighed.  “All right, honey, but here, at least drink this.”  She picked up a coffee out of a tray that sat on the table next to her and placed it in his hands.

“And eat this.”  Debbie reached down to the floor and pulled a container out of a bag that Justin recognized as being from the diner.

He handed his mom the coffee and grabbed the food out of Deb’s hands.  “Oh, God, you two are lifesavers!  I'm starving.”

Justin bent over the container and dug in as Deb and Jennifer smiled at each other behind his head.  At least one part of their mission had been accomplished.

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After Justin had eaten and Jen and Deb had both peeked in on Brian, who was still sound asleep, Justin sent the two women on their way, promising he would be fine.  He stood up, cracking his back, and made his way back to Brian’s room.

He stopped short at the door when he realized Brian was sitting up a little more than when he had left and that his lover’s eyes were open.  “Hey,” he said softly as he took a tentative step into the room.

Brian looked at him with a puzzled expression on his face.  “Do I know you?”

Justin felt his heart drop into his stomach and he took a small step back.  “Um,” was all he could manage to say.

Suddenly Brian smiled evilly.  “I’m just fucking with you, Justin,” he said, his voice a little hoarse.  “Get your ass over here, Sunshine.”

Justin actually put a hand up to his heart as he let himself breathe again.  “Asshole,” he muttered, as he hurried to Brian’s side.  He stopped when he reached the bed, unsure of what Brian’s reaction to his presence would be.  “How…” his voice cracked a little and he cleared his throat.  “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit.”

“I’m so sorry.  Is there anything I can do to help you?”  Justin fidgeted, still trying to gauge Brian’s mood.

Brian held up his hand for Justin to take and intertwined their fingers.  “Well, you can start by kissing me,” Brian smiled at his lover.

Justin’s brow wrinkled in confusion, but Brian was already pulling him closer for a kiss.  Justin pressed his lips to Brian’s, which felt cracked and dry, but God it was Brian and he was kissing him, and he was alive and pretty much okay, and just thank fucking God!  He tried to kiss Brian gently, not wanting to hurt the man, but Brian opened his mouth and slipped him some tongue before pulling away to catch his breath. 

“God,” Justin breathed out as he pulled back too.

“Yeah,” Brian replied.  He winced a little and let go of Justin’s hand to reach the trigger to his morphine pump.  He pushed the button and sighed.  “This is the good shit.  Too bad they don’t send these things home with you.”  He smiled up at Justin and once again held out his hand, which Justin took.  “Sit down, you look tired.”  Justin sat down in the chair that had been his bed last night and tried to figure out what the hell it was about Brian that was freaking him out.  “I’m really glad you’re here,” Brian said softly. 

Justin actually looked around for a moment to see who Brian was talking to.  “Huh?” was his brilliant response.

“I’ve missed you,” Brian smiled again, and Justin realized why he was so spooked.  It wasn’t Brian’s regular smile.   It was an open and honest smile, that could possibly even be called sweet.  Justin had seen this smile before in rare moments when Brian let his guard down, but those moments were few and far between.  Not only that, but Brian was being attentive and caring, and nice.  Brian with painful, helplessness inducing injuries, was actually being fucking nice.  The hell?

Alarms were going off in Justin’s brain, but he made himself smile back.  “I…I’ve missed you too,” he replied.

“I was almost afraid you wouldn’t come after I’ve been such a shit to you, but I’m so glad you did.  I really don’t want to go through this alone, and you know, Mikey’s great, but he’s not you, you know?  I’m not in love with Mikey.” 

Justin almost leapt from his chair.  Who the fuck was this pod person?  It was like the pre-marriage Brian times fifty.  The same Brian who had actually used the word “cuddle,” and had meant it.  Justin gritted his teeth and tried to keep his terror from showing.  “I love you too, Brian.  You know I’ll always be here when you need me.”

Brian yawned as his eyes began to droop again.  “I know…” he slurred a little bit.  “Sorry, I’m so fucking sleepy all the time.  Love you.  Go home and get some rest.  I‘ll be fi…” he drifted off again.

Justin’s heart contracted and after making sure Brian was out, he stood, made his way hurriedly from the room, out of the ICU and into an elevator.  Fuck!   He left the hospital and lit a cigarette with shaking hands.  After a few puffs he took out his cell, and after scrolling through his contacts hit send. 

He waited impatiently and finally she picked up.  “Hey, Daph,” he said shortly.  “Can you come get me?  I‘m at the hospital.”

“Justin, what’s wrong?” Justin’s best friend asked, alarmed by his shaking voice.  “Is it Brian?  Is he all right?”

“He’s awake, and he’ll be okay.  It’s just…”

“Fuck, Justin, you’re scaring me.  What’s wrong?”

“I think he has brain damage,” Justin almost whispered into the phone.

“I’ll be there in twenty.”

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