The Duke of Tremont

Chapter 19

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Brian awoke early and sat up in bed parting the heavy velvet bed curtains. Peering out the window he could see the sun peeking over the horizon. The air felt a bit warmer this morning, perhaps some of the snow that had covered everything for so long would melt a little today.

He knew the warm temperatures and sunny day would be short lived, it was still only January after all. Still it was nice not to have to run shivering to the fire to dress for once.

“Brian?” The voice brought him out of his reverie.

“I’m here,” he moved back to the bed and pulled open the curtains once again.

“Oh, all right,” Justin replied trying to pretend he was looking at Brian, but really focused on a point somewhere over his shoulder.

The two shared an awkward silence for a moment; “how did you sleep?” Brian finally spoke.

“Fine,” Justin answered shortly.

“Any nightmares?” Brian pushed.

“No.” Again a short answer and also a lie. Brian knew for a fact that he had at least two during the course of the night.

Brian sighed inwardly, this is how all of their conversations went lately. Justin had been entirely closed off from him since the Christmas fiasco two weeks ago and Brian was at a loss of what to do.

He watched Justin crawl out of bed and dress himself in a plain black tunic and breeches of mourning. He then went out to the sitting room and grabbed some parchment and his drawing pencils moving to the overstuffed chair he had drug in front of the large window. He sat down and pulled a blanket over his feet, for he still had not entirely gotten over his illness, set the pencils and paper in his lap and commenced with staring out the window.

Brian sighed again at the familiar scene, for it was one that Justin played out every day. He sat and stared at nothing for hours on end, only eating and sleeping when he was forced. He did not speak to anyone beyond short one or two word sentences and would not allow anyone to touch him.

The last had been the most difficult to cope with for they had always been a very tactile couple. To not be able to hold Justin, especially when he was so obviously hurting was killing Brian.

Brian had tried several times to talk to the young man, but to no avail. Patrick and Vic had tried as well, but both men had also received the same flat stare and then a polite, but pointed brush off.

Through it all Brian kept his promise to stay out of Justin’s emotions, though he wanted more than anything to get into the boy’s head and begin to heal all the hurts that resided there.

Brian ran a hand through his hair and dressed himself in simple black as well; “I have some things to take care of, will you be all right here until Emmett comes?”

“Yes, fine,” replied Justin without turning his attention away from the window.

“Very well,” Brian turned and went out the door closing it softly behind him. Once out of the room he leaned his forehead against the door and brought his hand up to rest his flattened palm against the dark wood; “let me in Justin,” he whispered softly.

Inside the room Justin’s eyes rested on the door where Brian had just exited their room. A single tear slipped down his cheek; “I’m sorry,” he mouthed.

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Brian had decided to take advantage of the slightly warmer weather and made his way outside to the gardens. He found himself wandering the same part of the garden where they had all picnicked earlier that summer. The same day that The Duke’s man had come to them asking for a meeting with The Sap and Claire.

He recalled the carefree way he had laid his head in Justin’s lap and the kiss they had shared in front of their family. He once again cursed his sister and her husband for ruining what he had with Justin and causing such a senseless war.

“My Lord!” Brian’s eyes shot up to find Molly hurrying to him where he had sat down to think on one of the benches. She looked odd wearing an obviously hastily donned woolen cloak that was much too long for her. He thought he recognized it as one of Lindsay’s.

“Lady Molly what brings you out here? Should you not be inside where it is warm?”

She smiled and sat next to him on the bench; “I was in the solar with the other ladies when we saw you walk by the window. I told Lady Lindsay that I needed to speak with you so she gave me her cloak and here I am.” Molly ducked her head briefly and then brought her eyes shyly up to the handsome lord, “any excuse to get out of embroidery,” she said in a bemused tone.

Brian laughed out loud; “though I have never really tried it myself I would probably agree with you.”

“Emmett was with us. He does wonderful work.”

“Of that I have no doubt Lady,” he smiled warmly at his lover’s younger sister; “I feel as if you did not chase all the way out here to speak of embroidery though.”

Molly’s face grew solemn; “how is my brother today?” She asked looking pointedly into the older man’s eyes.

He turned his face away; “the same,” he spoke quietly. Molly visited her brother daily so she knew his condition. There was no need for Brian to elaborate any more.

Molly sighed and took one of Brian’s hands, pulling him around to face her; “Justin is...” she stopped sighed and then started again, “Justin is sensitive.” Brian snorted and she smiled at him, “perhaps you have noticed this already.”

“It is one of the things that drew me to him Lady,” Brian answered with a quiet sincerity.

Molly nodded and continued; “he was very close to our mother. I loved her too, but the two of them shared a special bond. I don’t think he ever really thought about the possibility of our parents actually coming to harm.” Molly clenched her hands into tight fists in her lap; “I, on the other hand, knew that both our parents were doomed the day Justin returned from your parley and told me they had been taken.”

Brian retook one of Molly’s hands in his; “you are wise beyond your years young Molly,” he spoke fondly.

Molly smiled and then hardened her expression again; “you must make him stop this My Lord,” she spoke firmly; “he cannot be allowed to fade away from us.”

“I’ve tried everything. I don’t know how to reach him anymore.”

“You mean you’ve tried everything but force,” Molly replied calmly.

Brian looked to the young woman, horrified; “surely you don’t mean that? You would have me force myself upon your own brother?”

Molly stood and began to pace back and forth; “if it is the only thing that will pull him out of this melancholy then yes!” She exclaimed; “we all know of your bond and I know that he has asked you not to use it, but I think you must, whether he wills it or no. I think it is the only way he will return to you. To us.”

“I don’t know,” Brian hesitated.

Molly turned suddenly approaching Brian, who was still sitting on the bench. She stopped and fell to her knees in front of him; “please My Lord...Brian. I don’t want to lose him too. You must help him!”

She bowed her head to his knees, her warm tears soaking into his breeches, and he ran a gentle hand over her head; “I promise I will try Molly. I will try.”

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“I brought you some food Sunshine!” Deb exclaimed as she burst into the room with her usual liveliness.

Justin cringed inwardly, Deb being the last person he wanted to deal with in his current mood. He stood and moved to the table; “thank you,” he said quietly moving to sit in front of the soup and bread Deb had laid out.

It was all he could do not to scream when she sat across from him buttering her own piece of bread; “so how have you been doing?”

“If you did not already know you would not be asking me;” replied Justin in a less than friendly tone.

“Well, I believe that is the most you have said in two weeks young man. I suppose my presence irritates you, but at least I’ve got you talking,” she retorted.

Justin rose quickly from the table and walked back over to stare out his window; “you have no right to judge anything I do,” his voice was dull.

Deb rose and went to him; “no I suppose not,” she replied as she laid her hands on his shoulders. He flinched but did not pull away, “I cannot imagine what that must have been like for you.”

“No you really can’t.”

“But I do know,” she continued turning him to face her; “I do know how much Brian loves you and how you care for him. You must stop closing him out and let him help you.”

“No...No...I...can’t do that.”

Debbie took his chin in her hands; “I doubt that your mother would appreciate that you are destroying two more lives because of her. You must try to heal from this. Let yourself feel again; for your sake and Brian‘s.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek then escaped the room, leaving him alone to ponder her words.

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Brian stayed away from their rooms until late that night. Molly had given him much to think about and though she had made some solid points he still felt hesitant about her suggested tactic. He tried to think of any other way to get through to Justin and make him open up.

He shivered as he pressed on down the corridor. The slight warming trend had lasted less than a day. Even before he and Molly left the garden this afternoon the sky had begun to cloud over and chilly wind had blown in.

Outside the storm was in full force, an icy sleet tapping against the castle windows. Brian entered their suite happy to see that Emmett or James had a roaring fire going in the bedchamber fireplace. He looked around surprised to see Justin vacant from the chair he had practically lived in for two weeks.

“Justin,” he called as he wandered into the bed chamber. He stopped short as he felt a cold blast of air hit him. Justin was nowhere to be seen and the doors to the balcony were wide open; “Justin!” Brian saw a dark shape huddled out on the balcony and he ran through the doors full of dread. “What are you doing? Are you crazy?” He asked the young man who was standing in the freezing rain still dressed only in his tunic and breeches.

Justin turned to face Brian. His eyes were rimmed with red as the tears mingled with the sleet on his face; “I’m...I’m...trying...to...feel...ag...again,” he stuttered, teeth chattering; “Deb…s…s…aid I must feel again. I thought…the…the…cold would clear…my…my…mind.”

“What?” Brian stared at him for a moment before wrapping him in his arms and leading him back inside; “my God Justin are you trying to kill yourself? You are still not well!” He began to strip a silent but compliant Justin out of his clothes and grabbed a warm robe wrapping the young man up in it. He moved him to sit on the thick bearskin rug in front of the fire.

Brian removed his own damp clothing and put on his robe as well. He returned to the fire, sat behind Justin and wrapped his arms firmly around his lover, not letting him pull away this time; “tell me why you did that,” he said in a tone that brooked no argument.

Justin was silent for a long moment as he gazed into the fire; “I don’t...I can’t talk about this.

Something inside Brian snapped. All the anger of the senseless death of an innocent, the frustration of Justin’s silence and now the fear of Justin perhaps hurting himself had all become too much for the man to bear.

He pushed Justin away from him and then spun him violently in his arms so they were face to face; “tell me why!” He shook his shoulders a bit; “damn it Justin I deserve to know! I have trusted my deepest secrets with you and now when you need someone; when you need help, you push me away!”

“Brian stop it!” Exclaimed Justin struggling to get free, “get your hands off me!”

“I won’t stop! Not until you talk to me,” Brian responded gripping him tighter still. Brian closed his eyes and opened his gift, easily slipping past all of Justin’s defenses and melding with his emotions.

“No,” Justin cried weakly, still half heartedly trying to push Brian away.

“Yes,” whispered Brian, clenching his teeth at all the turmoil he could sense inside his lover. The black despair was breathtaking, but even more troubling was the overwhelming feeling of guilt he sensed. Suddenly Brian realized why Justin was so bottled up; “oh Justin,” he spoke softly, pulling the young man close to him; “it was not your fault.”

Justin’s tense body finally relaxed into Brian’s arms; “I killed my mother,” he sobbed out; “I voted to kill her.”

“God, no,” Brian spoke again, sending all the peace and love he could muster into the boy’s soul. He stroked the blond hair rocking him gently, “she was already dead Justin. The moment they took her it was over, deep down you know that. Molly knows, she told me today. If anyone is to blame it is I, or Jon. We should have known what Claire and her husband were capable of.”

“And my Father? Is his life forfeit as well?” Justin sobbed out.

“You already know the answer to that too my love. I’m so sorry.”

Justin let his tears flow freely, finally letting all of his guilt and grief go; “I’m sorry Brian. I’m sorry for shutting you out like that,” he said when he could finally speak again.

“It’s all right, as long as I have you back,” he cupped Justin’s chin in his hand and brought his eyes up, “do I have you back? You won’t leave me again?”

“I won’t leave you Brian,” he answered softly closing his eyes as Brian leaned in to place a gentle and loving kiss on his lips. Justin pulled back a bit then turned and snuggled back into Brian’s arms; “tired. Sleep now,” he muttered softly.

“Yes, sleep Justin,” Brian spoke into soft, blond hair as he pulled a blanket closer and covered them both with it.

It was not long before both men succumbed to slumber.

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Brian was having the most amazing dream. He dreamt of hot hands trailing down his torso and an even hotter mouth engulfing his cock. He had this dream quite often in the last few weeks since him and Justin’s physical relationship had come to a halt.

He tossed his head a bit and moaned reaching down to stroke the hair of his dream Justin. There was another loud moan in reply and Brian’s eyes suddenly snapped open. He raised his head a bit and looked down realizing that this was not dream.

Justin had thrown their blanket aside, opened Brian’s robe and was indeed sucking his cock; “God Justin,” Brian panted; “please don’t stop!”

Justin smiled to himself; “it had been a long time for both of them and he could tell Brian was close so he pulled off.”

“What the…?” Brian raised himself on his elbows and started to protest. He was cut off as Justin’s lips devoured his own.

Something felt off and Brian brought his hands up to cup Justin’s neck and stroke his cheek. He pushed the young man away quite suddenly.

“What is it?” Justin asked, his eyes slightly glassy.

“You’ve a fever,” Brian answered as he began to get up so he could find clothes; “I must send for Mel at once. I knew you would become ill again!”

Justin rose from his spot on the rug and stood a bit unsteadily; “no.”

Brian glanced at him; “what do you mean ‘no’?”

Justin’s hands slipped to the tie of his own robe, which he slowly and sensuously untied, letting it drop slowly to the floor; “I mean no you are not going to get Mel right now,” he purred in a husky voice as he moved to Brian and cupped his still exposed cock.”

“You are mad! I’m not going to make love with you right now Justin. You are ill! You need a healer!”

“Oh, I think you are going to make love to me. Right. This. Minute.” Justin answered as he punctuated each word with a stroke to Brian’s cock and playful bites to his nipples.

“But your fever,” Brian moaned, his voice quite a bit weaker than it was just a few moments ago.

“Will still be here when we are through My Lord;” Justin answered, drawing one of Brian’s earlobes into his mouth as he slowly manipulated them closer to the bed. “The sooner you are inside of me, the sooner I will become a good little patient for Mel and Daphne,” Justin moved away from Brian and crawled onto the bed now stroking his own cock for Brian’s viewing pleasure.

Brian looked at the beautiful, nude man on his bed, face flushed with fever and desire and his will left him all at once; “Christ you are such a demon! Mel will kill us if she finds out!” He pounced on the bed next to Justin and took him into a passionate kiss reveling in the heat that was radiating off the young man.

“How would she ever know?” Justin gasped out between kisses.

“Have you met the woman?”

“Good point;” Justin gasped as Brian trailed hot kisses down his neck, then attacking his sensitive nipples.

“You’re so hot, it feels as if you are on fire;” Brian muttered, moving his mouth even lower on Justin’s body.

“What about Mel?”

“If we keep talking of Mel this will be over before it starts Sunshine;” Brian said as he pulled Justin’s cock into his own mouth.

“Ah! Good point, My Lord;” Justin grated out as he clenched the sheet and raised his pelvis into the welcoming heat.

Brian continued to work Justin over, bringing him to the edge a few times, denying his release. Finally he pulled away completely, moving back up Justin’s body, licking and nipping the heated skin as he went; “I want to be inside you;” he whispered into Justin’s ear.

Justin’s hair was damp and matted to his forehead and as his fevered eyes met Brian’s the other man thought he had never seen anything more beautiful; “yes,” Justin replied, “I want that too. Make me yours again Brian.”

Brian reached into the small pot of oil by the bed and then gently rolled Justin onto his side. He stroked Justin’s fevered body some more and then settled himself behind the younger man. He slipped two fingers in, gently preparing Justin for it had been awhile since they had done this. After a bit he added a third and then applied more oil to himself before gently slipping inside. He waited for Justin to relax before he started quietly rocking into his lover.

Justin raised his head, turning and reaching up to pull Brian’s head closer to him, never breaking their rhythm as they kissed deeply. Finally as Brian felt himself get close he reached around and stroked Justin until the younger man gasped and spilled his seed with a satisfied moan. Brian was not far behind and soon experienced his own release melding with Justin’s mind again so he could once again feel the double pleasure.

Justin moaned again as he felt the warmth of Brian’s seed spilling into his bowels and felt the other man’s orgasm at the same time; “hmm, was so wonderful;” muttered Justin sleepily as Brian pulled out.

“How do you feel?” Brian asked, brushing the damp hair from Justin’s forehead.

“A bit cold,” Justin shivered as his eyes started to droop.

Brian kissed his temple and covered him gently with a blanket before moving off the bed to call for James; “wait here. I will have James fetch Mel.”

He pulled the bell for James and cursed himself for letting Justin talk him into such foolishness when the lad was so obviously sick. Justin sat up a bit; “you worry too much My Lord;” he said, reading Brian’s thoughts; “I shall be up for another round in no time.”

Brian snorted a laugh shaking his head at the boy’s pluck; “I’m sure you will be. Now lay down and rest!”

James entered the sitting room and Brian greeted him; “please send for Mel, James. Justin seems to have gotten himself a fever.”

“Among other things;” came a faint, but sassy reply from the vicinity of the bed.

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