Brain Damage/Brian Damage

Chapter 10

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"I miss them already," Justin commented as he traced lazy circles around Brian's nipples.

Brian shifted a bit in their bed. "I don't miss having our house to ourselves."

"Brian!" Justin slapped him playfully.

"I'm missing so much of his life," Brian replied quietly and Justin knew he was talking about Gus.

"We'll have to make it a point to see them more often."

Brian nodded. "So, what are you doing Saturday night?"

"Ooh, why? Are you asking me out on a date?"

"Yes. No. Sort of?"

"Um, what the fuck?"

Brian propped himself up on one arm. "There's this thing for Pittsburgh business owners on Saturday night. It's kind of like a networking thing. I want you to be my date."

"Briiiian," Justin whined. "I thought you hated these things. I thought they were too hetero for youl"

"I do, but Ted and Cynthia talked me into it. They convinced me it will be good for business. And it is too hetero. That's where you come in."

"Ah, so I get to be your token gay husband to piss off the straight people."

"You are my husband, not a token, and I don't want to piss off the heteros. I want to take their money. Besides, didn't you know? Being gay is in right now."

"Do I have to wear a tie?"

"Jacket, no tie."

"Fine. I'll do it."

Brian rolled over on top of his lover. "You'll be paid handsomely," he whispered as he gently took hold of Justin's cock and began to stroke.

"See that I am," Justin gasped in return.

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Brian and Justin sauntered into the crowded ballroom of the swanky hotel in downtown Pittsburgh. They couldn't help but notice the admiring looks they were receiving from both women and men. A waiter approached them and Brian ordered them both a few strong drinks. "I'll need it to get through this," he said in a low voice to Justin.

"Then make mine a fucking double. I'm bored already."

"You know, it wouldn't hurt you to network a bit yourself. I'm sure many of these people are patrons of the arts."

"That's what my agent is for," Justin replied with a sweet smile.

Brian rolled his eyes and then was approached by one of his clients. As it turned out, they had a fairly good time. Brian made a lot of contacts and Justin was surprised to learn that a few of the people had heard of him. One lady actually owned one of his paintings. Many of the business cards Brian handed out that night had Justin's information written on the back as well.

Brian was talking to another prospective client and Justin was hovering, hoping to get his husband to leave as soon as he was done. He heard someone clear their throat behind him. "Justin."

Justin's heart sank and he turned to find himself face to face with his father. "Craig," Justin replied evenly.

"What are you doing here?" Craig asked, his voice cool.

"I'm here with Brian." Justin noticed that Brian had finished with his conversation and pulled on his lover's arm to turn him around.

Brian's eyes grew hard and steely. "Craig," he said shortly, grabbing hold of Justin's hand so he could pull him away from his father.

"I didn't know they allowed fags in this association," Craig sneered.

"Uh, last time I checked, it was for all Pittsburgh business owners, not just straight ones," Brian replied. "And since Kinnetik is a Fortune 500 company now, I guess I have as much right to be here as you."

"I wonder how they'd feel about letting child molesters in," Craig asked conversationally.

"You bastard," Brian grated out between clenched teeth.

Justin moved between them and placed a hand on Brian's chest. "Brian, no. I'll take care of it." He turned to his dad. "Craig, you've made your point with me. You don't approve of my disgusting lifestyle, I'm not your son anymore, blah, blah, blah. I'm over it so you need to get over it too. I would appreciate it if you would leave my husband and I alone from now on."

"Husband?" Craig spat out. "Molly told me you cancelled that farce of a wedding when you moved to New York a year ago.

Brian tensed and he noticed Justin go pale and his jaw clenching. "It's really none of your business, Craig," he said stiffly, not wanting to give his father the satisfaction of watching him fall apart from this little piece of information. He took Brian's arm. "Good night."

The valet brought the car around and when they were settled Brian started to speak. "Justin..." he started.

"Is it true?" Justin interrupted, in a flat emotionless voice.

Brian took a deep breath. "Sort of."

"What the fuck kind of answer is that? Either it is or it isn't!" Justin yelled.

"It's complicated," Brian answered in an even tone.

"No, it's really not. Did we cancel our wedding, and have I been living in New York for the past year?"

"Yes...but..." They pulled up to the loft. They had decided to stay there that night instead of driving out to Britin so late.

"Fuck, Brian!" Justin willed himself not to cry. "I can't do this right now. Can you please just leave me alone for a bit?"

Brian nodded and they made their way up to the loft in silence. Justin moved over to stand by the windows. Brian wanted nothing more than to talk with him, but decided against it after reading his body language. He decided to give Justin some time and went up to the bedroom to strip and take a shower instead.

Justin stood lost in thought. Brian had been lying to him. All this time, Brian had let him believe they were happily married, when in fact, they hadn't even been in the same city for the last year. A sudden flash hit him.

He was sitting at his computer drawing, and Brian wrapped his arms around him from behind. "Brian, why am I here?"

"Well your mommy and your daddy decided they wanted a baby..."

"I'm serious. If I hadn't gotten hit in the head, would I even be here?"

Brian had looked down, unable to answer.

Justin sucked in a breath and pulled out of the memory, only to be assaulted by another.

An explosion at Babylon with smoke and fire all around. People screaming in hysteria and then a soot covered Brian finally...finally uttering those words he had longed to hear. "I love you."

Justin's shock and pleasure, but then the next day rejecting Brian's proposal, thinking that it was solely based on the fact that Brian had almost lost Justin again.

He remembered the first time they went to Britin and finally realizing Brian was serious about settling down with him. Their whirlwind engagement and then the mutual decision to call it off.

All of these visions swirled around Justin and he became angrier and angrier. When he awoke in the hospital, Brian had lied to him. Had tried to manipulate him into thinking they were married, because once again, he felt pity, or guilt, or whatever.

Justin grabbed his coat, wallet and cell phone and ran out of the loft. Once outside, he began to make his way down the street and called a cab.

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Brian stepped out of the shower and dried himself off. He needed to talk to Justin and explain. God knows what the boy was thinking. He moved through the bedroom, "Justin, we're going to talk. I don't care if..." he trailed off. The loft was empty. "Fuck!" he exclaimed.

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Justin settled back in his seat and closed his eyes. He was only vaguely listening to the flight attendant. "Welcome to Liberty Air flight 598 from Pittsburgh to New York..."

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Brian waited impatiently for Jennifer to answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"It's Brian."

Jennifer smiled. "Hi, Brian, what's up?"

"Have you seen Justin?"

"No, I haven't. Brian, what's wrong?"

"He's gone."

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