Before There Was You, There Was You

 

 

Chapter 35

 

 

 

 “All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.” ~ Anatole France


***
 

 

Old habits are hard to break.

If nothing else, the well-used cliché eased Shane’s guilt a bit.

Shane sat at the bar in the lounge of the upscale hotel dressed in her "boyish" attire; complete with bound breasts and slicked back hair.

She'd been dressing like a woman for the past several weeks; a condition she agreed to when she took the job at Kinnetik. She had chafed at the idea at first but eventually had come to accept it, still she couldn’t resist slipping back into familiar territory.

She knew Rena wouldn't approve. Rena felt she was finally progressing towards finding her true identity. But it wasn’t a matter of finding her identify, it was a matter of creating one. She had no self-identity. She grew up pretending to be what other people wanted her to be. It was how she survived. She never had time to discover who she really was.

Brian was right in one aspect, Shane was more attracted to men then she was to women. She was straight. However there was a certain comfort and control she enjoyed when she played the gay boy with straight men. When she got over whelmed with life she resorted back to her old lifestyle. It was what she knew best, where she felt most in control.

The Empire Hotel was twenty miles outside Pittsburgh. Just far enough away from all the demands and decisions she faced at home. Her life was changing, drastically. Neither Brian nor Rena would allow her to “hide”, as they saw it, behind her boyish image anymore. It was very hard letting go, and when things got too much for her, she donned her “gay trick” personality and went out looking for release. For her it was, to coin Brian’s phrase, “pain management”.

She hated hiding these little excursions of hers. She knew both Rena and Brian had their own methods of “coping” when life got too much for them; it wasn’t like they wouldn’t understand. Still, Shane felt like she was letting them down each time she slipped back into old habits. And after her little slip about Emilian’s phone call, she didn’t want to disappoint Rena, yet again.

Shane was restless, and confused. She needed a distraction. Preferably in the form of some straight businessman who wanted to indulge their deep-rooted fantasy of fucking a young boy. And tonight, Shane was just the girl for the job.

Currently she had her sites on one of the two gentlemen who sat at the other end of the bar.

"Another scotch,” she called to the bartender in the deep baritone voice she used when in character.

The bartender was a burly man with a sour disposition; not at all fitting into the typical bartender stereotype. He didn't want to hear her problems and wasn't pleasant in the least. Each time he gave her a drink, he'd ask for ID. This was her third drink. Shane took a long swallow of the heated liquid and turned her attention back to the men at the end of the bar.

“Derek, I would never presume to instruct you on how to counsel your client, but if I WAS so inclined, I would advise you to tell your client to take this offer. My clients’ generosity in this situation is really astounding when you think of it. I have photos of her entertaining boys of questionable ages, in their marriage bed for God sakes. The fact that there is ANY offer on the table is truly amazing considering the facts.” The man making the offer put his hands up to ward off the other man’s objections.

“Not that I’m judging, mind you, far from it. Personally I applaud your client’s contribution to the sexual education of these young boys. However, my penchant for deviant sexual behavior is not shared by all.”

Shane smiled as she listened to the man work his skill on his opponent. She’d been ease dropping in on their conversation for the past twenty minutes. The sandy haired man impressed her. From what she overheard, they were two lawyers trying to come to an agreement over a divorce settlement. The sandy haired man was representing the husband and employing what sounded to Shane like some pretty strong armed and questionable tactics on his opponent.

“Fuck you, Slatter. Pictures? What did you do? Hire a P.I. or did you just manufacture these so called pictures?” The second lawyer made a rude sound before he continued his tirade.

“I know all about you, Slatter. It’s a wonder you’re still allowed to practice law at all. Word is that you’ll do anything to win a case. Even resort to blackmail and extortion. Yet no matter how many times you’ve been slapped by the courts, you’ve managed to escape being disbarred, AND your caseload is full. Why is that I wonder?” The second lawyer asked, clearly bewildered.

The sandy haired man, Slatter, looked amused by his opponent’s outburst. He looked down at his drink and idly ran his index finger around the rim of the glass.

“Maybe it’s because I like to win Derek. I’m sorry, but are you at ALL familiar with that? Winning?” He looked up from his drink and gave Derek a pitied look.

“Oh well, never mind I’m sure you can imagine how a thing like “winning” would make any client, or judge, since most my clients are judges, turn their heads the other way when I’m erroneously accused of crossing legal ethical bounds. Actually I’m quite offended you suggested I would resort to such tactics.” Slatter tilted his head and gave Derek a curious stare.

“If you’d like, I can be more than offended; I could be hurt, devastated, even humiliated; whatever it would take to make you accept this generous offer,” he baited.

Shane turned her head and smiled. Slatter was clearly playing with opposing counsel.

Derek huffed. “You have no scruples, do you? How could you defend that man anyway, he hates you! If I recall correctly, last year he was calling for your disbarment. Yet here you stand representing him,” Derek retorted angrily.

“Speaking as an enormously unlikable person, I find it difficult to maintain grudges against all those who hate me, don’t you? Besides, his money is a good as those who supposedly like me. And speaking of money, did I mention that this is a very generous offer? It seems to me that a long drawn out trial would be a terrible strain on your client. I mean just think of the media coverage. Pictures of her and those “boys of questionable ages” splashed all over the news might be upsetting. Then again, it might not be so bad. She’s very photogenic.” Slatter donned a sinister smile. His meaning was not lost on Derek.

Shane marveled at Slatter’s relentless verbal onslaught. He was extremely intelligent, witty and cunning. She instinctively knew Derek was no match for this shark.

Slatter raised his drink to his lips and looked up. His eyes met Shane’s. She knew she should look away, but she couldn’t. He had the most amazing slate blue eyes; mischievous eyes that were currently twinkling at her. He tossed her a knowing smile before turning his attention back to the business at hand.

“You’re bluffing,” Derek challenged.

Shane watched Slatter’s face. She saw the intensity in his eyes; he was mapping his next move. He looked up at her again. She smiled and winked at him. He nodded, a gleam shone in his eyes.

“Am I? Well Derek, lets ask my friend over there,” he said and motioned over towards Shane.

Shane froze. Derek turned around and looked at Shane. His face went white. Shane had to hold in her laugh. She knew Slatter’s game. He got lucky just now. Shane looked like a young boy of questionable age. Slatter was going to use her as bait to get Derek to take his offer.

Shane was feeling generous. She lifted her glass and saluted the unsuspecting lawyer.

He turned around quickly. “Deal,” he said and gathered his coat and briefcase up.

“Fuck the rumors. It’s all true I see.” He looked back at Shane one more time and hesitated.

“That kid looks like a pro. I wonder… Did you hire him just to make me believe you had pictures?” he said, catching on to Slatter’s game.

“What does it matter?” Slatter returned shrewdly.

“Maybe I did. Or maybe he IS one of your client’s boys. But either way, your client is screwed,” Slatter said holding the man’s stare.

“How do you figure?” Derek asked.

“If he is one of your client’s boys, then I have those pictures. If I hired the boy, then that should tell you how far I’m willing to go to win this one. Like I said, either way, your client is screwed. Take the offer Derek. Do us both a favor, it’s Sunday evening, and I’ve a long week ahead of me. I’d rather be tearing a new asshole into some other lawyer. I actually like you Derek. You’re a dying breed. A lawyer with some morals left,” Slatter said mockingly.

“I’ll bring it to my client,” Derek said. He put his coat on and gave Slatter a scathing look.

“This didn’t have to get ugly you know,” he said quite seriously.

Slatter’s face went blank. He picked up his drink and downed it. “I’m a lawyer Derek. A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table,” Slatter said.

Derek shook his head and left.

Both Shane and Slatter watched him leave. Slatter got up and walked over to Shane.

“Mind if I join you?” he asked sitting down on the stool next to her, not waiting for her answer.

“Are you going to charge me by the hour?” Shane asked.

Slatter laughed. “Lucky for you I work on contingency.”

“Too bad, cause I charge by the hour and the clock started running the moment you sat down.” She smiled and raised her glass to him.

He smiled back. “Ah, so you are a pro,” he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

God those eyes were amazing Shane thought.

Slatter leaned over and whispered to Shane, “You know, we’re both in the same line of work.”

Shane tilted her head. “Yeah, how do you figure?”

“We both fuck people for money,” he said and called the bartender over.

Shane laughed.

“What are you drinking?” Slatter asked.

“Scotch,” she answered.

Slatter ordered two scotches. “So tell me, what’s a nice boy like you doing in a place like this?” he asked playfully.

“Looking for true love. You?” Shane retorted.

“You mean besides applying my unscrupulous legal tactics on that poor defenseless lawyer by using you as inducement to achieve my goal?” he asked.

“Which I haven’t charged you for, yet; but yeah, besides that.” Shane was enjoying their banter.

Slatter shrugged his shoulders. “It’s as good a place as any I suppose. I’ve got nowhere better to be.”

Shane heard something very sad in his voice. A sadness she was all too familiar with. She drank her scotch in silence.

“I’m sorry, where are my manners?” Slatter said, interrupting the silence.

“Adam Slatter.” He offered his hand to Shane.

“Shane,” she said taking his hand.

Adam held on to her hand, he caressed the back of it with his thumb.

“Soft,” he murmured to himself.

Shane pulled her hand away. His touch was warm, comforting and all too inviting.

Adam smiled at her, revealing even white teeth.

“Shane? Just Shane?” he asked.

“Yeah, just Shane.”

“Ok, Just Shane. Tell me, have you eaten yet?”

Shane looked at him as if he lost his mind. Here she was, out looking to get laid, and paid according to what she told him, and he was asking her out to dinner?

“Hey, it’s your dime. You sure you want to waste your time? I mean, in case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m a sure thing. You don’t need to buy me dinner,” she said conspiratorially.

Adam chuckled. “I don’t want to fuck you, Shane. No offense. You’re extremely attractive. But I’m not gay. However, I could use some company. Some honest company,” he amended.

“Honest?” Shane laughed. “Now that’s rich. If you’re looking for honesty, you’ve got the wrong gir...guy.” Shane almost slipped. Fuck!

Adam gave her a sly look. “I beg to differ. Between my personal life and my line of work, I’d say you’re just about the most honest person I know.”

“Now come on, get your skinny ass up and let’s go get some tacos. I’m in the mood for Mexican,” he said and pulled Shane from the stool.

Shane laughed, enthralled by this man. “I’ve got a great Spanish accent,” she said as she let him pull her from the stool.

“I’ll bet. Hey, if it gets us a decent taco, I’ll pay extra,” he said and led her out of the hotel.

They waited in the cold while the valet brought his Mercedes around. He opened the door for Shane.

“A gentleman, huh? I don’t know about that. Might cost you extra. Not used to gentlemen,” Shane teased.

“Get in the fucking car, Shane,” Adam said and winked at her. “Better?” he asked.

Shane smiled. “Much. More my style.” She got in the car.

Adam closed the door and walked around to the driver’s side. He tipped the valet and got in.

“If I put my Andrea Bocelli CD in will that cost me extra?” Adam said as he sped away from the hotel.

Shane made a face like she just tasted something bad. “Oh man, I hope you’re loaded ‘cause that will cost you BIG time!”

Adam laughed. “What the fuck. I just made a fortune off of that deal. I feel like splurging.” He put the CD in. The first song on the CD was Ava Maria.

Shane groaned loudly. “Hey, I’m not into torture! I'd rather you just fuck me.” Shane hated classical music.

“Hey, my dime, right?” he said smiling.

“What if I pay YOU to turn it off?” Shane teased.

Adam took pity on her and switched to the radio. Randy Crawford’s voice flooded the car.

“I play the streetlife, because there’s no place I can go
Streetlife it’s the only life I know
Streetlife and there’s a thousand parts to play
Streetlife until you play your life away

You let the people see, just who you wanna be
And every night you shine, just like a super star
That’s how the life is played a ten cent masquerade
You dress, you walk, you talk
You’re who you think you are

Streetlife you can run away from tide
Streetlife for a nickel or a dime
Streetlife but you better not get old
Streetlife or you’re gonna feel the cold”


Shane sank deep into the soft leather seat of the car as the music washed over her. Street life. Her life. The song permeated Shane’s brain. The lyrics summed up her whole existence perfectly. Her life was painfully being bared with each verse. She suddenly grew morose. She turned her head and looked out the window of the expensive car.

What the fuck was she doing? She was a girl, pretending to be a gay boy who just picked up a straight trick; which would have worked out fine if she were pretending to be the straight girl she really was. Can a person be more fucked up? God, what a mess! A tear rolled down her cheek.

Adam watched from the driver side as Shane’s mood changed. He wondered how such a young, beautiful boy came to such a life. He contemplated his own life and how it wasn’t that much different from the boy's.

He was pushing forty and still masquerading through life. He had sold his soul years ago for a life of wealth and prosperity. He attained the wealth and prosperity. He had forgone the life.

He lost his first wife through his callous nature and unyielding obsession with work. All his other relationships since were either business or personal arrangements. His whole life was a series of deals, contracts and negotiations. He couldn’t remember the last time he actually felt genuine joy.

He reached over and captured the tear that ran down Shane’s face with his finger. She didn’t flinch.

“Come on, fancy face, no crying,” he said softly.

Shane turned her head and smiled weakly at him. “I think this is a mistake. Let me out here.”

“At least let me take you back to the hotel,” Slatter said. Sorry to be parting company with the boy so soon. For some reason, he found his company enjoyable.

Shane shrugged. “Whatever.”

Slatter pulled the car over and turned to look at Shane.

“Hey, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m great at making deals,” he said and winked at her. Shane smiled.

“I have a deal for you. You pretend that you actually give a shit, and I’ll pretend that I actually care. We’ll go eat some spicy Mexican food. Then I’ll take you to this Salsa club I know uptown. We’ll eat, drink and dance till we fucking pass out. I’ll take you home, or wherever you want afterwards, and tomorrow, we can each go back to our fucked up lives. But tonight, well tonight we’ll both do what we do best. Pretend. Only tonight, we’ll be pretending for our own benefit, and not for someone else’s.” Slatter paused, waiting for Shane’s answer. He couldn’t believe he was actually anxious about what he would say. He really wanted the boy to say yes.

“Deal?” he asked

Shane put her tongue in her cheek and stared at him. A habit she picked up from Brian. “Deal, but won’t you feel funny dancing with a boy?”

Adam smiled widely. “Not if you’re a good dancer.”

Shane laughed. “I’ll have you know that my dancing skills are only surpassed by my cock sucking skills,” she said teasingly.

Adam laughed heartily and put the car back into drive.

“Yeah, well considering how many times I’ve been called a cocksucker, I would argue that makes ME the expert.”

Shane laughed. He was very witty. She enjoyed bantering with him. “Look at that! Something in common. Who’d have guessed?”

Adam winked at her. “I would have,” he said and turned the car towards the restaurant.

 

***


 

“Why is he baking?” Rena asked Brian.

Brian shrugged. “He’s trying to make up for upsetting you last night.”

Rena sighed. “He doesn’t have to make up for anything! I told him that. We were both upset, and it was YOUR fault anyway,” Rena complained.

Brian made a face at her and turned the channel on the TV with the remote.

Justin and he arrived at Rena’s around dinnertime. They had spent the whole morning at the loft just indulging in each other. They slept in late, and leisurely fucked when they woke. They showered and Brian gave Justin a long deep massage to work out the kinks from the previous nights activities. Justin’s arms and back were sore. Brian felt guilty that he was still a bit tender today, but it was to be expected. Justin’s body wasn’t use to that kind of exertion.

He tended to Justin’s sore body with extreme care. Rubbing soothing oil all over him. His blond took advantage of course and kept finding new places that needed ‘tending’ throughout the massage. Justin insisted that his sore muscles felt so much better when Brian kissed them. Brian was only too happy to oblige. The massage turned sexual and Brian wound up getting oil all over himself and his expensive silk sheets. The designer sheets were ruined. For once, Brian didn’t mind.

Afterwards, Brian went down to the diner and bought them take out pancakes for breakfast. Brian was NOT about to cook. Deb gave him a suspicious look when he ordered the take out. She wanted to know where her Sunshine was. Brian informed her that “he was back at the loft waiting to get fucked.” That earned him a slap and a glare.

He brought the pancakes home and they ate in silence. The day was perfect, they were enjoying just “being” with each other and Brian was content to spend the entirety of it at the loft. But Justin was anxious to go to Rena’s to apologize to her for snapping at her last night. Brian assured him he didn’t have to, but Justin was adamant. Brian would have preferred spending the whole day just lounging around the loft, having Justin all to himself. Last night was amazing, and Brian was feeling ridiculously romantic today. A condition he’d rather share in private with Justin.

When they got to Rena’s, she insisted they stay for dinner. James made lamb stew. Justin insisted on making dessert. Needless to say, Brian was not happy. He chose to sulk in front of the TV.

“God you’ve got the attention span of a two year old. I was watching that!” Rena said and grabbed the remote away from him.

“Well find a decent movie or something. What the fuck is it with Sunday’s anyway? There’s a fucking religious show on every other station,” Brian complained.

“We can always watch Lifetime. I hear you fags love that shit,” Rena teased.

Brian glared at her. “Do I fucking look like Emmett?” he said in mock outrage.

Rena laughed.

“Emmett does not watch Lifetime.” James perked up at the name of his lover.

He was coming out of the kitchen where he was helping Justin make Chocolate Crème Brulee. James, like Justin, enjoyed cooking. The Crème Brulee recipe was handed down from Justin’s grandmother. James couldn’t wait to taste it.

“I need a torch,” Justin yelled from the kitchen

Brian flinched. “Don’t give it to him. I have reason to believe he might use it on me,” he said.

“I wouldn’t blame him the way you’ve been acting tonight. What’s your fucking problem anyway?” Rena asked.

“I have one you can use,” James said answering Justin.

Brian groaned. “Why does that not surprise me?”

Rena laughed. “There is nothing about James that surprises me anymore.”

“Where’s Emmett tonight anyway?” Brian asked getting up to stretch.

“Working. Some big shot TV producer hired him to plan their wedding. The fiancé is thrilled with Emmett’s theme choice,” Rena informed him.

“The pimp look must be in this season,” Brian said.

James came back with the torch. “Emmett has excellent taste.”

Brian laughed. “Well that proves that theory. Love is blind.”

“And speaking of blind, what the fuck are you doing with John?” Brian looked pointedly at Rena.

“What? You want details?” she asked saucily.

“We’re not in college anymore, Rena. I don’t need to hear the details of your sex life. Well, not unless you’ve picked up some new tricks I haven’t heard about.” Brian smirked.

Rena threw the couch pillow at him. “As if I could teach you anything. Big fucking whore that you are,” she countered.

“Ouch!” Brian laughed.

“Justin, where are you! Rena just called your partner a whore, you going to let her get away with that?” Brian yelled between bouts of laughter.

“Rena, Brian is not a whore,” Justin said as he walked into the living room.

“He’s just monogamously challenged.” Justin smiled brightly at Brian and put the tray he was carrying that held the Brulee and some spoons down on the coffee table.

“Dessert is served,” he announced.

Brian reached for him and pulled him in for a deep, long kiss.

“What do you say we go home and have dessert in bed?” he whispered to Justin.

“I heard that,” Rena said and reached for a spoon to dig into the Brulee.

Brian sighed. “See, this is why I didn’t want to come here. She’s too fucking nosey,” Brian whined.

“Ha! I’m not the one asking details about your sex life!” Rena quipped.

“I’m not asking for details about your sex life, sis, I want to know what the fuck are you doing with John, He’s serious about you. Does he know you’re not serious about him?”

Rena looked up at him, her cheeks puffed out from a mouth full of Brulee. “What makes you think I’m not serious?’

“Because every time I see you two you’re acting like honeymooners. And you, my dear sweet sister, are not the honeymoon type.”

Rena glared at him. “Really? And what TYPE am I?” she asked dangerously.

“The type that fucks them and leaves them when they start getting too serious. The type that selfishly takes from her lovers and gives nothing in return emotionally. That type. The type that makes a guy fall in love with her then dumps them with some lame excuse to get out of it. That type. Should I go on?” Brian said cruelly.

“Brian!” Justin gasped his name.

“THIS, coming from you is beyond ridiculous!” Rena laughed bitterly. “YOU are the expert at avoiding attachments, Bean. Justin is the only guy you’ve fucked more than once, and you have the nerve to criticize ME?” Rena’s temper was boiling.

“I’m not criticizing you, Rena. I would never do that. But I am being honest with you. You use men. I don’t know if it’s because you are afraid all men have the capability to be like Emilian, or if it’s something else. But you do use them, and I believe it’s out of fear.”

Rena’s mouth dropped open. She didn’t know how to respond to that. She looked at Justin. “Justin, do me a favor, throw him out. I can’t.”

Brian sighed. “Great, why is it everyone wants to throw me out these days?” Brian turned to Justin “Is it me?” he asked incredulously.

Justin glared at him. “Brian, you have no right saying that to Rena. True or not, it’s hurtful; you need to apologize to her.” Justin fumed.

“Sorry, Sunshine, I don’t do apologies. Besides, she knows it’s the truth,” he said then turned to Rena.

“Rena, NO one loves you more than me, you know this. And it’s because I love you I am telling you that you have to stop this madness. You’re scared to death of letting anyone get close, and you’re hurting other people in the process. What happened with Sean should have been a wakeup call. Are you going to let the same thing happen with John? When it gets too serious, will you push him away too? ”

He sat down beside Rena and took her in his arms. She struggled at first but then she let him hold her.

“Re, personally I could give a fuck what you do to John or any other man. That’s your business. But I DO care how it’s going to affect you, because I do believe you actually like John. A lot. That’s why I’m asking you to really think about where this is going with him. Be honest with him, Re. We agreed, remember? No more lies. Nothing can hurt us anymore. Only we can hurt ourselves.”

Rena sighed and pushed away from Brian. “I don’t know what the fuck is going on with John. I know I like being with him, but I can’t think past that. I’m not ready to,” she said honestly.

“Then tell him that,” Brian said.

Rena slumped back on the couch, a deep sigh escaped her.

“Promise me you’ll at least think about what I said, ok?” Brian asked Rena.

Rena rolled her eyes. “Fine. I’ll think about it.” She sat up and picked up her spoon and dug into the Brulee.

“Fucking control freak,” she muttered between mouthfuls of the creamy desert.

“I’m sorry, did you say something, worm?” Brian grabbed a spoon and dug into the dessert, playfully pushing Rena aside.

Rena put her spoon down. “The doctor called.”

Brian stiffened. “What did he say?” he asked, spoon suspended in his hand.

“He wants me to come into the office tomorrow to discuss the results.”

“Call Cynthia and tell her what time the appointment is. I’ll clear my schedule.” Brian said then went back to eating the Brulee. It was very good.

“Why Cynthia? I’ll just tell Shane,” Rena said.

“No, tell Cynthia. Shane has enough to deal with. I have her managing the art department. The staff is still having a hard time working with Claude, and until I replace him, Shane’s the only one who can keep order down there. I think Claude is afraid of her.”

“Brian, I can go work a few days a week in the art department. I’ve worked with your staff before, I’m sure I can handle Claude. This way it can free Shane up to do her job. I know it’s been very stressful for her. She told me she’s trying real hard to learn all she needs to know about Kinnetik and all your clients so she can better assist you plus keep order in the art department. She’d never tell you, but you’ve got her stretched pretty thin,” Justin said.

Rena smiled at Justin. “I’m glad she has you to talk to Justin. It’s not just work either. I know that she’s having a hard time adjusting to being a girl. She is trying so hard.” Rena turned to Brian. “I can manage your art department, Bean. For God sakes, I’m a therapist! I’m sure I can create some working harmony down there.”

“I appreciate the offer, from both of you, but I’ll handle it. I’m interviewing another Art Director this week. Shane can hold out another few days,” Brian said.

He knew Shane was having a hard time, but he wasn’t going to let up on her. She didn’t need coddling; she needed to know that Brian believed she could handle it. That he had confidence in her. God knows her confidence level had been slipping lately. Brian saw it. She was itching to go back to her boyish ways. Brian wasn’t about to let that happened, at least not in his presence.

He liked Shane. The little shit got under his skin. She’d been so confused for so long, it was going to take some time. Brian knew about her little excursions. She was probably out on one tonight. He didn’t say anything. Change was never easy, as he well knew, and sometimes you slipped back a bit. But he had confidence she would eventually accept change and become the person she was destined to be. And not what she thinks she should be.

The phone rang. James got up to get it

“Domina, Viv is on the phone.” James handed the phone to Rena.

“Viv! Jesus that was fast! I just spoke to you yesterday,” Rena said into the receiver. She paused, listening to what Viv was saying on the other end. “Actually, tell him yourself, he’s right here. Hold on.” Rena handed Brian the phone.

He gave her a questioning look.

“I called Viv yesterday and told her about you needing a lawyer to get your rights to Gus back. She said she has some information,” Rena said.

“This soon? It’s the weekend.”

“When Viv calls, they jump. She has several lawyers on retainer you know.” Rena smiled. That was Viv, her multiple marriages kept many lawyers gainfully employed.

Brian took the phone. “Hello, Viv, how’s the new husband. Does he fit?” Rena told him she had just recently got married again. Marriage was Viv’s hobby.

“Brian, so nice of you to pretend to care! You actually sound sincere too. Nice touch,” Viv said mockingly.

“Comes from years of practice dealing with you “Aunty Viv”,” Brian drawled out sarcastically.

“And Peck’s bad boy rears his ugly head.” She sighed into the phone.

This was how they usually communicated. Beneath the snipping though, there was affection. Justin observed the two of them enough to know they each had an appreciative respect for the other.

“What do you have, Viv?” Brian asked, ending their banter.

“Well, Marc, who just happens to be the best civil rights lawyer in all the country, gave me a list of names of lawyers in your area that he would recommend to represent you. His advice is to NOT get some outside high-powered lawyer. He’s familiar with the courts in Pittsburgh. They are uncomfortable with gay custody battles to begin with, and have been known to take exception when big guns are hired to come into their courtrooms. And they tend to favor the women.”

“Thanks Viv. I’ll look at the names. Fax them to my office.”

“Already done, Peck.” Viv’s voice was full of mirth.

Brian sighed.

“There was one lawyer in particular that he suggested you call. He had worked with him on a few cases. According to Marc, the man is brilliant, though a bit unconventional. “He never loses, he’s a God damned miracle worker when it comes to winning un-winnable cases.” Those were Marc’s words,” Viv said.

“What’s his name?” Brian asked.

Viv gave Brian the name; he grabbed a napkin from the table and motioned to Justin to get him a pen. Justin got a pen for him and Brian scribbled the name down on the napkin.

“Thanks, Viv. I’ll check him out.” Brian then handed the phone to Rena, without saying goodbye. He folded the napkin and put it in his pocket.

Rena gave him a scathing look. She took the phone. “So, Viv, you are coming for Thanksgiving, right?”

Thanksgiving was just two weeks away and she was planning a big dinner. This would be the first Thanksgiving “ever” where she would have ALL of her family with her. Viv, Brian, James, Justin, and Shane. She was very excited.

“I’ll be there, sweetie, don’t worry. I’m bringing my new husband too. I know you’ll just love him!” Viv said.

“Don’t I love them all?” Rena teased.

Viv laughed. “Yes, you do. Gotta run, baby. See you soon.” Viv blew kisses into the phone and hung up.

Rena hung the phone up and looked at Brian. “So, now what?” Rena asked.

“Now I check out this lawyer.”

“With any luck, Lindsey and Mel will be reasonable. I don’t want this to become ugly. I’m sure we can work out an arrangement. I just want my rights back. I am his father; I never want him to forget that. And I want a say in his life. It’s not like I’m asking them to give him up. They are his parents, I know that. But so am I,” Brian said flatly.

He hated having to do this. It was his fault this was happening to begin with. Justin was right. He should have never signed his rights away.

Justin got up and went to sit by Brian. “It will be fine, Bri.”

Brian looked at him and smiled. “Yeah.”

Justin put his arms around Brian’s neck and hugged him. Brian leaned into him and closed his eyes. God this was going to be tough.

“You know, we can take the rest of the Brulee home and you can feed it to me in bed,” Justin whispered into Brian’s ear.

“You’re not taking it all, it’s too fucking good!” Rena said.

Brian groaned. “See, I told you she’s too fucking nosey. Got hearing like the fucking bionic woman!”

Justin laughed. “Don’t worry, Re, there’s more in the kitchen. I left some for Shane,” he said and picked up the remains of the Brulee to wrap it to take back to the loft.

Rena nearly fell off the couch reaching for the retreating Brulee.

Brian laughed and got up to leave. “Take the Brulee, but leave the torch!” he called to Justin’s retreating form.

Justin laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ve much more effective means of torture,” he called back.

Brian moaned. Fucking kid was going to drive him crazy. Hell, he was half way there already. “Ok, sis, time to go. Tomorrow. Call Cynthia. Don’t forget,” Brian instructed Rena as if she was a child.

Rena stuck her tongue out at him. Brian stuck his tongue back out at her then went to get his and Justin’s coat. Rena laughed.

Justin came back into the room carrying the left over Brulee. He hugged Rena goodbye.

“I haven’t forgotten, Rena. I still want you to hypnotize me,” he whispered in her ear.

Rena pulled back from him. “This week, I promise. You’re really sure about this?” Sshe asked.

“More than ever,” Justin said.

He and Brian were getting so much closer in some ways, yet in other ways they still were very distant. His memory loss was a big obstacle in their relationship. Justin was determined to do whatever it took to work out their feelings about the bashing. And if there were even the slightest possibility that he could remember that night, and the dance… well, he had to try.

Brian came back with their coats. Rena walked them to the door.

Rena hugged her brother. “Don’t worry, Bean, Viv wouldn’t steer you wrong. I’m sure this lawyer will take care of everything.”

“We’ll see. I’ll call him tomorrow. See what he has to say.”

“What’s his name anyway?” Justin asked.

Brian pulled the napkin out of his pocket and read the name out loud.

“Adam Slatter.”

 


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