Blood and Roses

Justin and Ethan had been having a great dinner till a knock at the door interrupted them. As soon as Justin answered the door his world changed forever. All of his suspicions since the night of the concert proved to be true. The proof was an unknown guy standing in the doorway with a dozen red roses. It made Justin sick. He turned away from the door and pinned Ethan with a steely gaze.

"It's for you."

Justin wandered to a far corner of the small cramped apartment. His mind was reeling. The fucker had lied to him and he had the gall to deny it to his face. He couldn't believe he actually felt bad about accusing him of cheating, when deep down he knew his instincts were right. Ethan got rid of the guy as quick as he could. Justin noticed that he did accept the flowers from his 'fan.'

"It's not what you think." Ethan crossed the room to where Justin was.

"I think it's exactly what I think."

Ethan reached out a hand.

"Don't touch me!"

Ethan held up his hands. "I'm sorry."

"I knew, I knew, you bastard!"

Justin made a grab for the roses. The innocent flower would forever be tainted for him now. He didn't feel the pain as the thorns pricked the sensitive flesh of his palms. He started ripping the heads off the roses, crushing them. Justin pelted Ethan with the mangled flowers.

"I only wanted to be with someone who wants to be with me, someone I can be with forever. What a crock of shit," Justin yelled.

"I meant it. Christ, look what you're doing to your hands."

Blood pooled in Justin's palms as he continued to take his frustrations out on the roses.

"I was lonely and you weren't there."

"Oh, so now it's my fault? So, what, this is payback, I had it coming?"

"No, it was one stupid mistake. How many times did you forgive Brian?"

"Oh don't you dare bring Brian into this. I never had to forgive Brian because he never promised me anything. He never once lied to me and he never wanted me to hide and lie about who I was, you did."

Justin pulled off the cheap ring and slammed it down on the dresser with a smear of blood. Given time the ring probably would have turned his finger green; he didn't doubt it.

"Justin, I need you, I don't know what I'm going to do without you."

"You don't need me," Justin spat. One tear slipped down Justin's face. "Your music is the only thing you ever really loved."

Justin stormed out of the rat infested apartment and out of the building. When he hit the street he began walking with no destination in mind. As he walked grief overtook him and tears streamed down his face. His thoughts weren't of Ethan, they were of Brian. How could he have left the one man that was true to him if not in body but in mind and spirit? He had his chance; Brian would never take him back. Brian didn't do second chances. He lost the one man he ever loved and his heart was breaking. Justin felt so stupid for falling for Ethan's crap. Brian was right all along. Love didn't exist and roses wither and die. Justin was lost in his own thoughts and misery. He didn't even realize that he was starting to wander off the sidewalk.

Brian had just come out of the diner after having the worst cup of coffee. He happened to glance to his left when he saw Justin wandering in the street. His head was down and he obviously wasn't paying attention. Brian's heart stopped as he saw a car coming straight for Justin. He made a mad dash for the teen.

"Justin!"

Brian grabbed him by the waist and swung him out of traffic, still hanging onto him and panting he yelled out of fear. "What the fuck were you trying to do, get yourself killed?" Brian tipped his face up and noticed the tears that wouldn't stop flowing. "Justin, what's wrong?" He noticed that Justin's hands were bleeding. Anger welled up within him. "Did that fucker hurt you?" Brian brushed the bangs out of his face and caressed his wet cheek. "Come on, let's get out of here," he said quickly.

He put his arm around Justin and led him to the Vette. Brian opened the door for him and hooked his seatbelt for him. Justin sat there so quietly with this look of utter defeat in his face. It was really scaring Brian. He'd never seen Justin this way not even in the aftermath of the bashing. They rode in silence to the loft. Brian was willing to bet serious money that the fiddler was behind this.

In the elevator he kept one arm around Justin and only let him go when he had to unlock the door. Brian tugged Justin over to the kitchen sink and washed the blood away. He examined the small cuts; they weren't too deep but they would hurt for a few days. He got Justin some water, which he drank without thinking. Brian led him over to the couch. Justin just sat there staring off into space.

"Justin, talk to me, you're starting to scare me. What the hell happened?"

"You were right," Justin whispered.

"About what?"

"Love is bullshit."

"Did he hurt you?"

Justin stared at his hands. "No, I cut my hands on the roses that he got from another guy. The fucker cheated on me. Now I know how it feels, doesn't feel too good. I'm sorry I did that to you, Brian."

Brian squeezed Justin's leg. "Were you trying to hurt yourself tonight?"

Justin looked up startled. "No, God no. I was upset; I just wasn't looking where I was going."

"Good, cuz the greasy little shit isn't worth it."

Justin smirked at Brian's comment.

"Why did you have to push me away? If only you would have told me to stay I would have. Ethan was the biggest mistake of my life and he cost me the one thing I ever wanted."

Brian hated to ask, "And that would be?"

"You, all I ever wanted from the first moment I saw you was to be with you. I threw it all away for the garbage Ethan spouted."

"We all make mistakes, Justin. There's no shame in that."

"I just want things back to the way they were," Justin whimpered.

Brian pulled Justin up from the couch and led him into the bedroom. "Come on, you're exhausted. Why don't you get some sleep and maybe things will look better in the morning."

Justin kicked off his shoes and flopped down on the bed. Justin looked up into Brian's eyes and pleaded. "Hold me?"

Brian got into bed and pulled Justin into his arms. Justin rested his head on his chest and let out a contented sigh. He held Justin as he fell asleep. Brian watched over him as he slept. It felt so good to have Justin back in his arms again. Justin looked so beautiful when he slept. He'd be lying to himself if he didn't admit it; he wanted Justin back. He'd been a wreck without his golden boy in his life. It was funny; they both wanted each other back but both were afraid to take the steps to make it happen. Undoubtedly Justin thought he wouldn't take him back. Brian fell asleep stroking Justin's soft downy hair.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Justin awoke in Brian's arms. He watched as Brian slept. He never wanted to leave the safe confines of Brian's arms. Brian awoke to two brilliant blue eyes staring at him.

"Did you sleep ok?"

"Yeah," Justin said quietly.

He pulled himself out of Brian's arms and sighed. "Look, let's just get to the truth here. I don't know how you felt about last night but…"

"Terrified."

Justin frowned, "of what?"

"Last night, it was one of the best nights of my life lately."

"Me too," Justin smiled.

"I've never been close to anyone except you. All I did was hold you and watch you sleep. It was the best night of my life; it's terrifying."

"It doesn't have to be."

"Like I've said before it's your choice where you want to be. If you want to come back you can."

"Do you want me back?"

Brian didn't answer for the longest time and Justin feared he wouldn't say anything at all.

"Yes, I want you here with me. I've missed you, you little shit."

They both smiled at each other.

"That's all I needed to hear."

Justin threw himself into Brian's arms. They held each other tight, never letting go.

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