Getting It Right

The Second Meeting

Since Justin was helping out at the comic book store, he and Michael had moved their working place to the back room there. That gave them time to work together between customers. They couldn't very well continue to use Brian's loft and this filled the bill admirably. The store itself was making a slight profit but Michael was OK financially because of Rage's success. They had settled their differences mostly in Mikey's favor as Justin admitted that he would also have told Brian if somebody else had been deceiving him, and Justin felt guilty that he had not himself told Brian about Ethan.

Mikey had made the case that he had told Brian in the unsuccessful hope that Brian would do something to avert the break-up. Michael was Justin's main contact with the "family" although he dropped by Lindsey's regularly to see Gus. He also stopped by Debbie's but with her romance with Horvath moving right along, she wasn't always available. He saw Ted and Emmett occasionally but he avoided the diner and Babylon because he wasn't sure how he could deal with running into Brian there. The fact was that Brian wasn't there all that often either but Justin didn't know that.

They were working on Rage together in the back room a few days after Justin's traumatic afternoon at Daphne's. Justin was still trying to make sense of what he had learned there so he said to Michael: "You know, I don't think we talked about what happened at the hospital the night of the prom. We talked a lot about the bashing, and I'm sure that helped me, but I'm not sure what you told me went on when I got to the hospital"

"That was a bad time." Mike replied. "Brian stayed there for three full days until they said you were going to survive. I stayed with him most of the time. Your mother was there most of the time too, but she had to take care of Molly. Daphne was there every day. My mom and the others were all in and out. Then you woke up and you remember the rest, don't you?"

"Yeah," Justin allowed, "they kept coming all the time I was in the hospital, except for Brian."

"Brian acted weird afterward," Mikey admitted. "I know he didn't come to see you. Nobody saw much of him all the time you were in the hospital. He would stop by a few times a week but he always left early and always alone. He did a few tricks but mostly didn't seem interested in sex. He sure didn't act like himself. It wasn't the Brian we knew. We knew it was partly because of you being in the hospital but he wouldn't talk about it. He wouldn't talk about anything. Mostly, he didn't talk at all. He just sat and stared at nothing in particular. And his drinking and drugging got worse. Brian was having some real problems of his own. He didn't stay away from the hospital because he didn't care about you. He did care but he just couldn't seem to handle it. I think he loved you even then." Mike concluded.

"Do you really think he loved me?" Justin asked.

"I've told you a thousand times he does." Mike responded.

"That's a thousand times more than he ever told me." Justin muttered, but from Daphne's revelation, he was thinking that he was wrong to say that. Not that it mattered very much now. Kissing Ethan in front of the crowd at the Rage party and then leaving with him would have destroyed any feelings Brian might have ever had for him. It was all over with Brian and he had brought it on himself.

"Justin, you and Brian need to get together. You need to tell each other the truth about how you feel. If you did that, you could solve the problems you're having." Mike prodded. Justin didn't answer. He didn't think he and Brian had problems. He didn't think they had anything at all. Justin was feeling miserable and didn't think things could get worse.

Then the door to the store opened and from the front of the store came the voice of Brian Kinney. "Hey, Mikey, I've got some Rage ads for you to look at." "Oh, Hi Justin," he said as he entered the back room. "You should look at them too. I've used some of your sketches,"

"Yeah" Justin forced his words out, hoping they sounded all right - he couldn't hear what he was saying - "But I gotta get to class so it'll have to be fast." Justin looked at the ads Brian had brought but he did not see them "Gotta go," he said, beating a fast retreat through the store and out the front door. He was pretty mixed-up, he thought. He was right. "At least," he said to himself, "I didn't give myself away. I thought I was going to faint when I saw Brian but they never noticed, I'm sure. I guess I do something right every once in a while."

Brian looked at Michael: "He couldn't get out of here fast enough when I got here, could he? And you've been telling me that he misses me, and knows he made a mistake. Sure didn't much look like that to me."

"Well things aren't always what they look like," Mikey answered, though he was also surprised a bit by Justin's abrupt departure.

"Mostly they are, though," Brian countered. He was thinking that he had driven Justin away and it was no surprise that Ethan's arms were ready. Somebody would have been there - if not Ethan, then somebody else. Justin was a very special kid, and probably happy with Ethan, who seemed able to be what Justin said he wanted. It actually looked like a good match to Brian.

"You two ought to get together and talk," Michael said, breaking into Brian's thoughts. "And what would we say?" Brian came back. "What you are really thinking and feeling." Mike stood his ground.

Brian smiled a half-smile and didn't say anything. "Fat chance of that" he thought. "I'll get the ads where they need to be, Circulation will be moving up. Believe me," he told Michael, as he got ready to leave. Out on the street, Brian congratulated himself. He was sure that Michael didn't see his knees buckle when he saw Justin. He was glad Michael hadn't realized how nervous he was in the presence of the kid with whom he had once been so comfortable. Nobody knew that he was in love with Justin - still in love with Justin. Life would go on. Nobody would ever know, nobody, of course, but Brian.

Back at the comic book store, the phone rang as Michael was sorting some new deliveries. It was Emmett. "Guess what, Em" Mike said, "We are right. Brian and Justin were in here together a few minutes ago, by accident of course. They are as crazy in love with each other as I have ever seen two people. You should have seen the looks on their faces. They wouldn't look directly at each other so they didn't see, but I saw. It's as obvious as it could be. I'm not sure that they know, though. When do you think they'll find out?

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