Without A Song

"I hope you won't miss me too much," Justin said to Brian over breakfast in the loft, "This is something that I have to do."

"I know that," Brian responded with a smile, "Meddling is a character trait of yours and I know it's something you have to do. Actually sometimes you're pretty good at it."

"That's not fair, Brian," Justin countered, "I have to help my friends out when I can. I said you could come along and you didn't want to."

"It's true you asked me if I wanted to come but I don't think you really expected me to say 'Yes,'" Brian told him, "You think you can do this better by yourself, don't you?"

Justin returned the smile. "Yeah," he told Brian, "You're good at a lot of things and you've helped me through a lot of tough times, but this is something I think I can do better myself. Thanks for understanding."

"You know it's only dinner tonight. I can get along without you for that long," Brian stated, "Especially when I'm going to have dinner with Ted and Emmett at the diner. Mikey and Ben too if they can make it. We won't talk about you."

"It's OK to talk about me if you feel you have to," Justin joked, "Just don't be too complimentary and bore the other guys out of their wits."

Brian gave up. Justin was on a roll. He hoped that what Justin wanted to do that evening would be successful too. Justin was having dinner with Ethan at a little restaurant near the campus. Ethan had told Justin the previous day that his boy-friend Tom had decided not to join Ethan in Pittsburgh. Justin thought Ethan was taking that information pretty hard, and wanted to provide some comfort for his friend. Brian was pleased that his relationship with Justin was now such that he could send his little twink off to dinner with Ethan in good spirits and without any qualms at all. They had come a long way.

"When will you be home?" Brian asked Justin as he was leaving the loft for the office.

"No earlier than nine, and no later probably than ten," Justin answered, "I want to finish a sketch for school tomorrow, and I want to save some time for you. I don't want you to feel deprived."

"I won't feel deprived," Brian laughed, "And I'll have the trick out of here by nine."

"Don't forget to turn off the surveillance camera," Justin cautioned Brian. They were both smiling.

"And you better watch out for Malcolm the Stalker," Brian called back as the door closed.

Debby and the guys - Michael and Ben were able to come - offered some good-natured ribbing to Brian during their dinner at the diner. "So he's back with Ethan," Debby laughed, "Who would have thought the great Kinney would lose his man to the fiddler?"

"Mom," Mikey told her, "Quit picking on Brian. Us older guys have enough trouble keeping our young guys in tow without getting a lot of criticism. So what if Justin was Brian's very last chance."

"Can't keep young guys in tow?" Ben wondered, "So that's why you picked an older guy like me."

It was a lot like old times that night at the diner - the gang together, giving each other a hard time. But it was also different, Brian thought. He was different. And he liked the change.

It was almost nine when Brian got back to the loft. He lit the fireplace and sat down in front of it. He hoped Justin would be home soon. Darn it, he was feeling deprived.

Unfortunately, it was a few minutes after ten before the door to the loft opened to admit Justin. Brian looked up at him. "You're late," he told the kid.

"More rules?" Justin pretended to pout, "Wait till you hear what happened. What a night." He plopped himself down, nestled himself up next to Brian and put his head onto Brian's shoulder. Brian felt very able to excuse Justin's tardiness. He put his arm around the kid, and they just sat there for a few minutes.

Brian was happy that Justin seemed so comfortable, but he also was curious to know about Justin's mission, and Justin just sat there so contentedly that Brian was afraid he would never bring up the subject. He figured that there had been some measure of success for Justin to be so calm.

"Well," Brian finally asked, "Are you going to tell me what happened or not?"

"Not until you tell me how much you missed me," Justin declared.

"Then I guess I'll never know," Brian replied.

"We got to the restaurant and ordered," Justin began, "Just a little small talk. I was just about to bring up the subject of Tom when Ethan started looking right past me. 'There is a beautiful kid in the booth behind you,' Ethan told me, 'Look back when you get a chance.'"

Brian was smiling but Justin warned him, "Don't interrupt my story. I know what you're thinking and you're right. It was Malcolm stalking me."

"I know the feeling," Brian interjected.

"Shut up, Brian," Justin responded, "I had to think fast. Guess what I did."

"You don't really want me to guess," Brian ventured.

"I waved at Malcolm, and asked him to come over to our table and eat with us," Justin related, "I introduced Malcolm to Ethan. Brian, I think it was love at first sight. They just looked at each other the whole meal."

"Weren't you just a little upset about how fickle Malcolm was being?" Brian asked, "After all, it was you he was stalking."

"Just about as upset as you would have been," Justin replied, "If I had switched to Michael when I was stalking you, Bri. Anyhow, Ethan invited us back to his place afterwards for some ice cream. Malcolm said he just loved violin music and Ethan wanted to play for him."

"That's original," Brian allowed, before Justin continued.

"I told Ethan to play the Meditation from Thais for Malcolm," Justin went on, "And that did it. Malcolm told Ethan that that piece should be 'their' song forever. I left then but Malcolm stayed. Brian, I killed two birds with one stone. I got Malcolm off my trail, and I left Ethan happy. I never even had to say a word about Tom."

"Wasn't that Meditation thing your song with Ethan too?" Brian asked.

"Sort of," Justin admitted, "But Ethan and I don't need a song now. We're just friends. Well, what do you think, Honey. How was that for fixing things quick?"

"I think young people are too quick to pair off, and too changeable when they do. Malcolm's just a little kid and Ethan's not much older," Brian opined, "I hope this all works out. You did a great job, Sweetheart. I'm proud of you."

Brian noted a quasi-hurt look on Justin's face so he quickly added, "Present company excepted, Sunshine. I'm glad for your forty-year old mind in that twenty-year old body. You're the exception, being so mature for your age. And you really did a great job tonight. All's well that ends well."

The hurt look on Justin's face went as quickly as it came but it was replaced with another look that Brian knew and dreaded. There was more. Brian was right.

"Brian, Honey," Justin told him, "We don't have a song."

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