Hard To Talk To

The guys had just settled themselves down in front of the fake fireplace. Brian had his arm around Justin who was resting his head on Brian’s shoulder. Justin was happily thinking what a typical night it was in the loft. Brian wasn’t thinking that at all.

“Are you in a good mood?” Brian asked the kid.

“Yep,” Justin assured him contentedly. “I’m always in a great mood when I’m with you.”

”You are?” Brian seemed surprised - at least slightly surprised – maybe more. “Well I sure don’t want to expand on that particular statement with you - not right now. Because I really need you to be in a good humor. There’s something I have to ask you and I think you better be in a pretty good mood when I ask it.”

”Gee whiz, Kinney,” Justin seemed surprised in return. “You’re the one who’s hard to talk to around here. People are always getting me to ask you stuff because they’re afraid to ask you themselves. Remember. I’m easy to talk to. I don’t see why you’d be worried about asking me anything.”

“Well….” Brian hesitated.

“Go ahead, Bri,” Justin prompted him. “I’m getting really interested now. You know you can ask me anything or tell me anything….”

“OK, Baby,” Brian complied. “We’re invited out to dinner - next Thursday, I think.”

“OK, Brian,” Justin suspected. “That is not all there is to this. What would I be upset about if we’re going out to dinner? If you want to go, it has to be some place that you’re willing to go – and you’re way harder to please than I am. If you didn’t want to go, I probably wouldn’t be hearing about it at all.”

“The Herrings,” Brian bit the bullet.

“The Herrings?” Justin choked slightly. “The Herrings from the boat ride from hell? Those Herrings? They want us to come to dinner – at their place?”

“Yep,” Brian admitted. “Those Herrings all right. And we’re invited to their place in Fox Chapel.”

“Brian,” Justin protested. “That would be awful. There wouldn’t be anyplace to hide from them – or throw their musical instruments – or anything. You can’t want to go. Can’t you just tell them we’re busy that night? We can sure arrange to be busy. There has to be something. Anything would be better than the Herrings. I don’t get it, Bri. Business? Do we have to go? Why do we have to go if we do have to? I guess I’m not in as good a humor as I thought I was. Do you want to go, Bri? Wasn’t the boat trip enough? Will the Mallards and the Swanns be there too?”

“Yeah,” Brian answered. “And the Trouts and the Fishers too, I think. They’ll all be there.”

.”And you really want to go, Honey?” Justin still didn’t get it. “I guess if it’s for business….”

“It’s not really business, Baby,” Brian told him, “Kinda like business but not really … But I think maybe we should go anyway…..”

“You know what, Brian,” Justin concluded, with a slight smile on his face. “This is getting just like when you’re trying to get the whole story about something out of me. So how about the whole story right now? From the very beginning if necessary. I can’t say I’m happy at this point - but I am interested.”

“OK, Sweetheart,” Brian agreed. “From the beginning it is. Seems Red Herring was having some legal problems. Me and Red are like - on a first name basis since we both survived the boat ride. His name is really LeRoy but all his friends call him ‘Red.’”

“Red Herring?” Justin interrupted. “Red Herring? You’re making all this up, Kinney. That’s what you’re doing. You’re just trying to get a rise out of me. That’s mean, Brian. Trying to scare me like that. You’re a real sadist.”

“Nope,” Brian told him. “It’s all the honest Injun truth, Sweetheart. Red was having some kind of legal problems with his business and I suggested he call Brandon about it. He was kinda mad at his old attorneys. So he called Brandon and Brandon solved the problem for him and everybody is really happy now.”

”Maybe not me, Bri,” Justin pointed out, “Not if we have to have dinner with that bunch – but I’m still missing the connection, I think.”

“Geez, Baby,” Brian wondered. “I’m surprised you don’t get it yet. The Herrings are having this dinner party to celebrate the solution. I guess it’s like - to honor Brandon more than anything else, and Brandon and Jason kind of have to go. We’re invited too, I guess cause I told Red about Brandon, and I could refuse or make some kind of excuse to get us out of it but….”

“But what?” Justin wondered back. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Brandon and Jason are afraid to go,” Brian told him. “You told them all about the boat ride and now they’re scared to death. They both really want us there but Jason is actually scared out of his wits. That’s why I think maybe we should go. Jason probably won’t get through the experience without you at his side - providing your valuable guidance and advice.”

“OK, maybe I can see that, Bri. But why isn’t Jason telling me all this instead of you?” Justin prodded. “Seems to me Jason should be telling me and I should be trying to get you to go instead of you telling me and trying to get me to go. Come on, Brian. There’s more to this story, isn’t there? How would you know Jason’s so scared? He’s afraid to even talk to you. Did Brandon tell you – or what?”

“Jason was afraid to ask you, Baby,” Brian confessed. “I guess the horror stories you told him about the boat ride really impressed him. Anyhow, he was afraid to ask you.”

“And just how did you find all this out, Kinney?” Justin smiled with a look of doubt on his face. “I can’t picture Jason being scared to tell me – and then talking to you about it? Nope. Not at all.”

“Malcolm,” Brian admitted. “Jason wanted Malcolm to ask you for him, and Malcolm was afraid to ask you too,” Brian grinned at him, “So Malcolm came to me. Malcolm is not afraid of me. He knows he can tell me anything. Malcolm’s not afraid of me. He really understands the real me – like maybe better than anybody …”

“Well, if it were the other way around, and I was asking you to go,” Justin concluded – keeping to the subject while reserving another argument for another day, “You’d just bitch around for a while and then go - because I wanted you to. So I guess we’re stuck with the Herrings next Thursday. We’ll even try to enjoy ourselves. You’re really a great guy, Brian Kinney – and I’d still think that even if I wasn’t in love with you too.”

That seemed to close the discussion – and it did - for a considerable period too. It was quite a while before Justin felt the need to post-script the evening’s conversation.

“Bri,” he asked finally. “Am I really getting hard to talk to – like you? Jason not wanting to ask me about this – and even Malcolm too. I don’t want that. I want people to be able to talk to me about anything.”

“Gosh I hope not,” Brian came back, smiling, “Nah – you’re still as sweet and accessible as ever, Sweetheart – it’s just this once-in-a-lifetime situation. Perish the thought that you’d ever get to be like mean old Brian Kinney, Baby. Nobody would want to be that mean.”

“Cut it out, Brian,” Justin smiled back. “You know what I mean. And you know I love you just the way you are – but I don’t want to be Brian Kinney. I want to be Brian Kinney’s boy-friend, the love of his life. That’s who and what I want to be. Forget that question I asked. But I guess I’ll be telling Jason and Malcolm what I think anyway …. Bothering you instead of me .”

“No you won’t, Baby,” Brian interrupted him. “You won’t say anything to either of them about it – except to tell Jason that we’ll be there and that you’ll get him through it smoothly. That’s what you’ll tell him and that’s what you’ll do. The guy I’m in love with is Justin Taylor – not Brian Kinney. And JT does not try to scare people. That’s my advice and it’s good advice too – so take it.”

“Yes Sir,” Justin grinned as he rubbed his hair against Brian’s cheek. “You’re absolutely right, Bri – just like always. Maybe the thing I love about you the very most is your always valuable guidance and advice. Yeah, I think it is.”

“You know what, Baby,” Brian smiled back at him, cuddling the kid closer while formulating some plans about just how to change Justin’s mind. “I really hope not.”
 

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