Wheeling and Dealing
Justin waited until the guys were seated on the floor in front of their
fireplace to tell Brian what he wanted to tell him.
"Brian, I am going to tell you something because I don't want you to think I'm
keeping stuff from you," he started off. "I do not want you to do anything. I
just want to tell you something. OK?"
"Sure, Baby," Brian assured him, "You can tell me anything any time. You know
that. Why would you think I'd figure you wanted me to do something just because
you tell me something?"
"Cut the sarcasm, Kinney," Justin took the offensive. "I don't want to do this
and I don't want you to do this either. Daphne's sorority is sponsoring a trip
to the dog races in Wheeling. It's for charity. She wanted us to go but I told
her 'No' cause I didn't think you'd want to go and I didn't want to go either."
"You're sure you didn't want to go?" Brian inquired.
"Naw," Justin repeated. "I didn't want to go. If you wanted to go, of course I'd
go too, but I don't really want to go. We could give them a donation for their
charity though. What do you think about that?"
"Yeah," Brian agreed. "Good thinking, Twink. You can pick the amount and we'll
send it off."
"OK, Brian," Justin concluded. "That's what we'll do. You're sure you don't want
to go?"
"Yeah, I'm sure," Brian replied. "I'd rather go to the Wheeling Symphony than
the dog races."
"Careful, Mr. Kinney," Justin grinned. "You don't want to commit yourself too
much. You know Ethan played the Mendelssohn Concerto with the Wheeling Symphony
last season and they want him back for the Tchaikovsky as soon as they can
schedule it."
"Like I wouldn't have to go down there if the fiddler was playing," Brian
laughed. "Like you wouldn't weasel around till you got me to go. Like maybe I
don't know how Justin Taylor operates. Well, save yourself the trouble. I'll go
willingly when the time comes. I actually like the Tchaikovsky."
"You try to take the fun out of everything, Kinney?" Justin retorted half in
jest. "And you actually know the Tchaikovsky?"
"Yep, Brian responded. "Dum, Dum, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da ,Da, Dum," Brian
approximated the major theme of the first movement. "Don't you know I know a lot
of stuff about classical music?"
"Yeah, I do," Justin conceded. "But I'm still surprised a little bit when you
demonstrate it."
"Crash Laundry Detergent," Brian told him.
"Crash Laundry Detergent?" Justin echoed.
"Yeah," Brian told him. "Remember my Crash Laundry Detergent TV commercial. That
was the tune the soap sang to that crazy housewife when she poured Crash into
the washer."
"I forgot that, Bri," Justin laughed. "That commercial played about two years. I
guess I forced myself to forget it. Gosh, that was irritating."
"Raised Crash's sales 33% and brought a wad of cash to Kinnetics," Brian
reminded him, "But I guess it was a bit irritating at that. I guess being
irritating is sometimes a part of an advertiser's job. Whatever moves the
product. Some people are irritating for commercial reasons - and some other
people seem to be irritating just because they enjoy it."
"Are you possibly trying to insult me?" Justin laughingly questioned the big
guy.
"Not unless you really do enjoy being irritating," Brian came back.
"Well, we use Crash right here, BK, and it never sang any Tchaikovsky to me when
I poured it in the washing machine," Justin groused, ignoring Brian's previous
statement. "And it never sang any Tchaikovsky to you either since you've never
done a load of washing – probably never in your whole life."
"OK," Brian replied with a smile. "I'll do a load tomorrow and I'll bet I hear
Tchaikovsky when I pour the Crash."
"If you don't forget to add the soap entirely, Bri," Justin told him. "Which you
probably will. You can do a lot of things well, Sweetheart, but I'm not betting
on you in the laundry."
"OK, Twink," Brian informed him. "I'm going to let you in on a little secret
that we didn't even mention in the commercial. If you forget to put Crash in the
washer, it plays the theme of the second movement."
"Cut it out, Brian Kinney," Justin laughed. "You know I don't want you anywhere
near the washer and you're taking advantage of that. I'll handle the washing and
I'll think Tchaikovsky when I pour."
"OK," Brian acquiesced, "but I'll bet you never used Crash till that commercial.
Bet that's why we're using Crash around here now – my Tchaikovsky commercial."
"Gee whiz, Brian," Justin smiled broadly. "Here I thought you said you were only
irritating for business reasons. I hope you're not a person who just gets a kick
out of being irritating."
Brian squeezed Justin closer to himself, which did not seem to irritate Justin
in the least, and silence fell upon the loft for a considerable period.
It was Brian who eventually renewed the conversation. "You're sure you don't
want to go to the dog races?" he asked. "You know I'll go with you if you do."
"No, I really don't want to," Justin assured him. "But if you wanted to go, you
know I'd go with you."
"Naw," Brian responded. "We'll just send the contribution. Make sure it's a nice
big one though."
"Will do," Justin concurred.
"And, Twink," Brian added with some fake superciliousness. "We'll be there when
Ethan plays the Tchaikovsky. It's the month after next, isn't it?"
"How did you know that, Kinney?" Justin was surprised. "I don't think the actual
date has even been set but you're probably close enough. Just how did you know?"
"Met Ethan on the street the other day and he just happened to mention it,"
Brian revealed.
"You know, Bri, I can't really figure out whether you like Ethan or not," Justin
wondered. "But you should like him. He likes you."
"He damn well ought to like me," Brian riposted. "If it weren't for me, old
Ethan Gold might have got stuck with you."
"Thanks a real lot, Brian," Justin replied with a grin. "You just might be right
but I don't think so. Actually Ethan was just not the right guy for me."
"Of course not," Brian said confidently. "Brian Kinney was the one and only
right guy for you."
"Yeah," Justin purred, rubbing his head against Brian's cheek. "Yeah, he was. I
couldn't irritate Ethan no matter how hard I tried."
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