Isn't It Romantic?

Flames were flying in the fake fireplace as the guys settled themselves into their usual position on the floor. Justin had a pensive look on his face and Brian had the beginning of a smile on his. He put his arm around his favorite twink and began the conversation.

"You have that look on your face," he told the kid.

"What look?" Justin wondered.

"The 'I want to tell Brian something I don't think he wants to hear' look," Brian answered. "Or maybe it's the 'I want Brian to do something I don't think he wants to do' look. They're pretty close so I sometimes get them mixed up. But I'm pretty sure I'm right. I don't know why you ever have that look either. You ought to know I always want to know anything you want to tell me, and I just about always do what you want me to do."

"I'm not sure you always act like you want to hear everything I want to tell you, Bri, or do what I want either," Justin smiled at him. "But it just so happens that you're a little bit right this time. And don't you dare laugh at me, Kinney. I want us to do something really romantic. I'm not sure what though."

"Is that all?" Brian seemed surprised. "I think we can manage that all right. I even have an idea, Baby. They're having a John Wayne film festival at those new theaters on the South Side. I don't know which ones are playing tonight but all John Wayne pictures are really romantic. Say the word and we're on our way."

"Not if I say the word I'm thinking of saying," Justin replied, his smile turning into a laugh. "I almost wish now you had laughed at me."

"Well I tried, Sweetheart," Brian laughed back at him, "It was just a suggestion though. But if there's some other romantic thing you have on your mind, I guess I'd like to hear what it is."

"That John Wayne film festival would be very romantic, I'm sure, Bri," Justin concluded. "But actually I did have something else in mind. I thought maybe we could talk about how we fell in love."

"Would that make for a very long discussion?" Brian wanted to know. "You fell in love with me the first time you ever saw me, and I fell in love with you right after you told me I was in love with you. What more is there to say?"

"OK, Kinney, you win," Justin seemed to give up. "You're just not very romantic. I guess I'll have to get used to being in love with a guy who is just not romantic."

"But I do love you, Twink," Brian protested, "And you know that. And I think I'm kinda romantic too. I don't think you appreciate how romantic I can be. Yeah, I am romantic. You just won't give me any credit but I am romantic. Brian Kinney is a very romantic guy. That's what I think."

"OK, OK," Justin laughed. "I surrender. Brian Kinney is the most romantic guy in the world. It's just that he's the only one who knows it cause he never lets it show."

"OK, yourself, Mr. Romance," Brian came back at him. "You never surrender so I know you have another way to get to your agenda. So go ahead. Be romantic. Tell me how you fell in love with me."

"You know already because I've told you a lot of times," Justin responded with a smile, "But I'm always glad to tell you again. I was standing under this lamppost outside of Babylon. I wasn't sure I was brave enough to go in. I probably wasn't. And then this guy came out. He was the most beautiful man I had ever seen. Maybe the most beautiful guy in the world. I could hardly breathe. Then he looked over at me and I couldn't breathe at all for a minute. Then he came over and started to talk to me. I could hardly hear what he was saying but I thought he was asking me to go with him. That's what I wanted to do - be with him forever - but I tried to play it cool. I knew he was the guy I was looking for - the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. The guy I was in love with for ever and ever."

"Geez," Brian responded. "That guy could have been an axe murderer. You're lucky I came out right after that and saved you. If I hadn't been there, you might have gone with that guy and who knows where you'd be now."

"Dammit, Kinney," Justin had to laugh. "You may be romantic but you sure do conceal it well. I really do give up. Justin Taylor surrenders. He's got love but he's not going to get romance, and that's that. I'll bet you do know when you fell in love with me, but I'm not ever going to know. I still love you anyhow, Brian. "

"You know what, Baby," Brian cuddled the kid closer. "I'm not sure when I fell in love with you. I'd tell you if I knew. I thought you were just another trick when I first saw you outside Babylon, right after the axe murderer had left because he figured you couldn't hear or speak, but I knew there was something different about you before the night was over. I was scared about that."

"So you tried to get rid of me because you thought I was special," Justin remembered. "You were in love with me that first night."

"Maybe," Brian told him. "But I didn't know what love was then so how could I know I was in love? I did know that being around you made me feel different, and that scared me. That's why I tried to get rid of you. I tried to get rid of you because I didn't want to get rid of you. Now I'm sounding crazy, like Justin Taylor, I guess."

"You're not getting any sympathy here," Justin replied. "I happen to think Justin Taylor is a very sensitive and sensible human being. And romantic too. I think it's OK to sound like Justin Taylor."

"I'm not surprised," Brian pointed out. "But maybe I was in love with you then. I wanted to do things for you and protect you. It must have been love even then."

"Brian," Justin reasoned. "You always had that hard-boiled attitude. You had to act like you didn't care about anybody or anything. But that wasn't the real you, Bri. You were always there when your friends needed you, long before I came along. So those feelings for me weren't all that much different from what you felt for your other friends. You always wanted to help anybody who needed you - and you always did."

"No, Baby," Brian recalled. "It was different with you. When I did things for my friends, I was doing it for them. When I did things for you, I was doing it for me. I did things for them because it made them feel good. I did things for you because it made me feel good. Is that love, Kiddo? Maybe it is. You're the expert."

"I'm not the expert," Justin told him, maybe wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. "I'm not the expert at all. I told you that you aren't romantic. I was wrong and you were right. You are romantic. You may be the most romantic guy in the world. I'd love you anyhow, but you are still the most romantic guy in the world."

Justin burrowed his head into Brian's cheek and brought the discussion to a halt. He had got more that evening than he had bargained for. It was quite a while before the discussion resumed.

"I am really surprised at how romantic you are, Brian," Justin said. "I love you. Say something else romantic, while you're in the romantic mood."

"Maybe we've had enough romance for the night, Sweetheart," Brian reasoned. "Don't you think maybe we've had enough romance for one night?"

"C'mon, Bri," Justin insisted. "There's no such thing as too much romance. You always tell me you do everything I want you to do. I want you to say something romantic."

Brian moved in and kissed the kid. "Do you think," he wondered, "That maybe we could go to the John Wayne festival tomorrow night?"

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