Power Struggle

It was business as usual in the loft. The fake fireplace was lit and the guys were settling themselves in place to watch the flickering flames. Brian wondered at the beginning of a grin on Justin's face as he wound his arm around the twink.

"OK," Justin began the evening's discussion. "OK, I have something to ask you and I don't want to argue about it so I'd like just a 'yes' or 'no' answer and that will be it. Ethan and Tom and Malcolm and Hunter want us to go with them tomorrow to see Brokeback Mountain at Loew's Waterfront. It won some big Critics' Award on TV Monday night. I think I'd like to see it. Do you want to go? If you don't want to go, I might still go with them but only if that's OK with you. Well, what do you say?"

"I guess Ben and Mikey are too smart to go?" Brian answered. "Ben and Mikey are pretty smart."

"That is not a 'yes' or 'no' answer, Sweetheart," Justin maintained, "But actually they already saw it and they liked it a lot. In fact, that's how come we were talking about it and decided to try and go together."

"I don't think I want to see Brokenback Mountain at all," Brian conjectured. "I hear it's about two old guys who are in love and they don't even know it. Now there's a crock if I ever heard one. If somebody's in love with somebody, they know it. And they're cowboys too."

"I can see this is going to be harder than I hoped, but maybe not harder than I thought," Justin laughed. "First of all it's Brokeback Mountain and not Brokenback Mountain as I'm sure you know. And it is possible for someone to be in love and not know it. I can think of one couple who were really in love for a long time and only one of them knew it. The other one eventually caught on but it took him some time. And, you know, Bri, cowboys are people too. They're a lot like other people. They have feelings too - and lives. There's more to cowboys than you see in those old movies you like so much."

"Yeah?" Brian came back, "Well cowboys are supposed to love their horses, and maybe sometimes the daughter of the rancher the crooks are picking on - but not some other cowboy."

"So you're saying that gay people shouldn't be cowboys?" Justin asked for clarification. "I thought you always said gays could do anything better than straights and now you're saying gays can't be cowboys, or cowboys can't be gay, or whatever it is you're saying."

"OK Twink," Brian decided. "Quit trying to twist my words. You know exactly what I'm saying even when I don't, so you know darn well what I'm saying now."

"You win as usual, Bri," Justin appeared to surrender. "Whatever you say. I think I got your answer to my question and it is that you don't want to go. Do you mind if I go without you? We're figuring on the 5:30 showing so I could probably be back here by 8:30 in case you were really missing me."

"Isn't 5:30 an ungodly time to go to the movies?" Brian questioned. Then he began to laugh. "Oh I get it. Frugal Justin wants to get in before the price changes at 6:00. Always an eye for the dollar saved, eh Kiddo?"

"It's exactly the same movie at 5:30 as it is at 8:00," Justin gritted his teeth. If Loew's is dumb enough to sell it cheaper at 5:30, it seems to me to be a good idea to let them. And we won't be getting the senior citizens' discount like some people might either. But you still haven't answered my question. Do you mind if I go with the guys without you, or will it be too hard for you to get through the couple of hours without me? They're going to stop at the diner after the show but I wouldn't want to go there without you so I'll come right back here."

"You know the trouble with you, Honey," Brian informed him. "When you get the answer to one question, you just ask another."

"Brian," Justin semi-whined. "Is it all right for me to go to the show or not? I won't go if you don't want me to, but I promised I'd let the guys know tonight."

"If I'm not there," Brian surmised, "You won't have anybody to hold your hand and I'm sure you like to hold someone's hand during movies."

"If I need to, I can borrow somebody's hand to hold," Justin commented with a big grin. "I'm sure somebody will have a hand available. Ethan will have an extra hand, I bet. You know that old song you like to croon at me, and a little bit off-key too, 'When I'm not near the hand I want to hold, I hold the hand at hand.'"

"That's not the way the song goes, Twink," Brian groused. "And I don't think Ethan's hand would be a good substitute for mine. Here, let me hold your hand now so you'll see what you're missing." Brian took the kid's hand in his, and continued. "Isn't that a lot better than holding Ethan's hand?"

"I think so," Justin admitted, "But I forget how holding Ethan's hand felt, so I could give you the definitive answer after the show tomorrow, that is, if you say I can go."

"Damn it, Taylor," Brian pointed out. "I am not trying to talk you out of going to old Brokenback Mountain like you are trying to talk me into going. Of course you can go. But you won't be getting kissed during the movie either - unless Ethan has a couple of extra lips too."

"That's funny, Brian," Justin laughed. "You never kiss me at the movies. You're always too busy with the movie to even notice that I'm there. If you kissed me at the movies, I might try to talk you into coming, not that I ever want you to do anything just because I want you to. But the way I get it, you're not going and I am. I'll call Ethan in a while to let him know. Meanwhile, if it's OK with you, I'll put my head on your shoulder and rest a while. Some things tire me out."

"And some things don't," Brian smiled at him. "But just put your head on Brian's shoulder and rest. He doesn't mind at all."

There was a period of silence in the loft which both of the guys appreciated. Brian was still holding Justin's hand and Justin was showing no signs of letting go.

"You know," Brian eventually rekindled the discussion. "I never actually said I didn't want to go with you guys tomorrow. Maybe I should go. Lots of people are talking about Brokenback Mountain so maybe I should see it."

"Well if you wanted to go, why didn't you just say so in the first place?" Justin wanted to know.

"I thought you wanted to argue for a while so you could think you talked me into going," Brian told him.

"Brian," Justin responded. "Didn't I start out by saying I didn't want to argue about it?"

"Yeah, you did," Brian agreed, "Which is the exact reason that I thought you wanted to argue about it. But I don't think you should give yourself credit for talking me into going. I always figured we should see it."

"Brian Kinney," Justin decided. "I don't know if we should even allow you to come with us now, but I guess you can come if you promise to kiss me during the movie."

"You drive a hard bargain, Baby," Brian allowed, "But OK, I'll kiss you during the movie if I don't get too wrapped up in the story and forget all about you. But you know what I think I will do? I think I'll kiss you now just in case I forget tomorrow. OK?"

That seemed to be OK with Justin so Brian kissed the twink. He might have kissed him again but Justin's cell phone rang and disturbed them. Brian could hear Justin's side of the phone conversation.

"Hi, Eth. Yeah we're going. How about you order the tickets in advance? We'll see you in the lobby about 5:15….. No, I didn't have to talk him into going at all. He wanted to go. If he didn't want to go, I could never have talked him into it."

Brian had to smile. The kid had his fingers crossed.

Return to Fireside Chats