Enjoying Life Together

Always Together

Justin left Brian reluctantly but here he was on the way to Daphne's. He had seen her only a few short times since he was back with Brian and as much as he loved Daff and enjoyed her company, he considered every hour spent elsewhere a waste of time if it could be spent with Brian. But Brian himself had shooed him out so he accepted Daphne's call to come over. "Aren't 21 hours of togetherness enough for today?" Brian had asked, "How many hours a day do you think we need to be together?"

Justin had answered, "24 aren't enough. Let's try 25 or 26 tomorrow."

Maybe Brian agreed with Justin but he shooed him out anyway. After all, he had instigated Daphne's call in the first place. He might regret the separation this minute but he wanted Justin to have a life separate from him. Justin was only nineteen years old and needed a separate life. Brian didn't think that was so important for a 31-year-old but he wanted Justin to have the best of everything. He looked at the clock and was surprised that Justin had only been gone ten minutes.

It had been another Saturday afternoon several weeks back, and under vastly different circumstances, when Justin had last visited at Daphne's. She was alone again. Her roommates apparently liked to study on the weekends. "Well, stranger," she greeted him on his arrival, "I told you I'd call you if you didn't call me, didn't I?"

"A lot of things have happened since then," Justin smiled, "A lot of really great things, and maybe that all started out right here."

"Maybe a lot more nice things will start today then," Daphne suggested.

"I don't need any more nice things, Daff," Justin answered, "I've got everything I want."

"Brian," Daphne surmised.

"Brian," Justin confirmed.

Justin recounted all the details of the events following his last visit. Daphne listened in rapt interest. "Gosh," she said to him, "You are one tough guy. Sometimes you show it and sometimes you don't, but you always seem to get what you want."

"Well, I was pretty scared for a while this time, but if something is worth wanting, it's worth fighting for," Justin told her, "Brian is worth it. I told you right after I met him that we would be together someday. I loved him the first time I saw him."

"Don't I know it?" Daphne admitted, "Remember you dragged me down to Liberty Avenue with you. Remember that first crazy night at Babylon, when you stole those two hunks from Brian, and then he stole you from them. You got just what you wanted then, like you always do. You're tough, Justin Taylor. I knew it that night and I've seen it since. Does Brian know how tough you are?"

Justin smiled, but he didn't answer the question. He did say, "I think early on I was ready to give up on Brian and you kept me going. I dragged you down to Liberty Avenue only after you insisted I go back down there. It looked like there was no hope but you kept pushing me, and now he loves me and we're together all the time."

Daphne wondered about that. "So when did he fall for you?" Daphne asked.

"I'm not sure. Someday I'm going to ask him," Justin replied.

"Why don't you ask him now?" Daff continued her interrogation.

"I'll know when to ask him, Daff," he answered, "I don't think he even knows himself. I think he was in love with me a good while before he knew it. He's made a big change in his life for me. He's adjusting to a lot of new things now; he needs help and I need to help him; so I'll hold off on the questions. I really love him, Daff, and I want him to be happy, even more than I want to be happy myself, and I intend to see that he is. Believe me, I'll know when to ask."

"Well for all your sweetness, I wouldn't want to be between you and the watermelon if you wanted the watermelon," Daphne declared.

"You'd be safe, Daff," Justin laughed, "But you're one of the few."

"How do you get away with it?" Daphne wanted to know.

"I'm cute," Justin bragged.

"I might be crazy but can I offer an opinion which might look like advice?" Daphne asked.

"You, Brian, and Debby have given me good advice when I needed it before, so go ahead. I'm listening," he replied.

"Don't over manage your life with Brian. Let him be Brian. You're sure he loves you. Let him be himself. He has to have a life of his own before he can really have a life with you," she told him, "You both need time apart. I can see how antsy you are to get back to him right now. I don't think that's all that good. I think if you enjoy your time away from Brian, you will enjoy your time with him all the more. You're not going to lose him because you're not with him 24/7."

"But I was so miserable when I didn't have him," Justin remembered, "I don't know if I could stand being away from him."

"Well, think about it. You're tough, Justin," she reminded him, "and cute."

Meanwhile, back at the loft, Brian waited about an hour and looked at the clock again. Justin had been gone 25 minutes. Brian decided that watching the clock was not productive and headed out for the comic book store to visit with Mikey.

When Brian entered the store, Michael looked up. He was surprised to see Brian alone. "When was the amputation?" he said with a smile.

"No amputation, wise guy, " Brian responded, "My much better half and I do have separate lives. He's over at Daphne's."

"Well you could have fooled me," Mikey answered, "You could have fooled everybody."

"He wants to be with me all the time, and I want to be with him, but that's not good for him," Brian responded, "Justin is still a kid. This 24-hour monogamy might be OK for us older guys but he's nineteen. He doesn't know what the world's all about yet. We probably shouldn't even be together at all but he seems to want it and I sure want it so we have to give it a try. I think it will work. This is a big adjustment for him and I have to help him, but I want him to be happy, and he has got to have other friends beside us old guys. I'm going to see that he's happy whether he likes it or not. I do miss him when he's gone though."

Michael smiled. Brian had never talked to him like this before. He had never talked about his feelings He had always acted like he didn't have feelings. Michael didn't think he was as smart as either Brian or Justin, but he wondered if he didn't see their relationship more clearly than they did. "You're not afraid of losing him, are you? You couldn't even push him away when you tried. Let him go a bit. Let him know that when he's done doing what he's doing away from you, you will be waiting for him, and he'll be waiting for you when you're out somewhere too. If you want him to be happy, be yourself and let him be himself. You don't want to smother him and you'll eventually resent it if you let him smother you. If you're happy, he's going to be happy too, and vice versa. You will both always have someone to come home to. I think you guys are hitched for life."

There was still a bit of the old Brian in the new Brian, so he replied, "Shit, Mikey, living with a professor has made you very wise."

Mikey saw the humor in Brian's response, and told him, "No, I got that wisdom from my mother."

"Oy Vay," Brian replied, but he was thinking about the advice. "Hitched for life," he thought. That didn't sound so bad to him.

Brian got back to the loft a scant five minutes before Justin. "I hate being away from you," Justin said.

"And I hate being away from you," Brian agreed.

They had planned to stay in that night and just be together with no specific agenda. Brian made sandwiches and Justin heated up some soup they had bought that morning at the deli. They were quieter than usual. They were both thinking and pretty much about the same thing since their afternoon conversations had ended on similar notes - though they didn't know that. Each of them had reluctantly concluded that the advice they had received was good advice.

After they ate, they sat down on the floor next to each other in front of the couch, and Brian started the conversation, "While you were out, I spent a couple of hours with Michael this afternoon. It was the first time we had a chance to just hang out for a long time."

"What did Mikey have to say?" Justin wondered.

"He talked about us. He likes us being together. He thinks we're 'cute,' but he told me he thought I was holding you too close to me - that you needed more time to yourself and to spend with other people. He told me what I already knew - that you have to have a separate life as well as our life together."

"That's funny," Justin said, "That's pretty much what Daff told me - that I had to let you live your own life too. I know she's right but, Brian, I spent four months away from you and I'm afraid."

"Sunshine, if you're not with me, don't you know that whatever I'm doing or wherever I am, I am always going to come home to you?"

Justin had heard that before so he smiled at Brian and asked, "By three?"

A little of the tension had disappeared with that exchange of banter. "Oh no, no more 'Rules,' but I'll want to get back to you as soon as I can," Brian assured him laughingly.

Justin replied, "Well, if I'm not here when you get home, don't wait up for me." They laughed. Then Justin said, "Brian, I'm still scared."

During the discussion, they had moved around and now they were kind of kneeling on the floor facing each other. "Don't be afraid of anything, Justin, I love you and I promise I'll want to be with you forever no matter what happens good or bad, better or worse, " Brian said. He took both of Justin's hands into his, and went on, "For richer, for poorer."

"For richer, for poorer," Justin echoed, "In sickness and in health."

Brian was smiling now and Justin was crying. Brian continued, "In sickness and in health till death us do part."

"Till death us do part," Justin repeated, "Oh Brian, I'll love you forever too."

They fell into each other's arms and stayed that way for a long time. Finally, Brian broke the silence. "Wanna go out and celebrate?" he asked.

"Let's go to Woody's and to Babylon, find the gang, and see how many heart attacks we can cause," Justin responded.

And that's what they did.

Return to Enjoying Life Together