I Will Remember You

Chapter 15

~ Molly's Dilemma ~

South Carolina, a few days after the wedding

By the time Justin and Molly arrived in Carolina, Justin was wishing that he had taken the bus with Tee. He never knew just how much a sixteen year old girl could talk. When they stopped at a convenience store to get gas, he idly considered getting some tranquilizers. If they didn't work on Molly, maybe they'd work on him.

It was late evening when they arrived at Justin's home. He introduced Molly to his 'grandparents' and took her bags up to her room. The elder James' were more than happy to have the young lady staying with them. Molly quickly became one of the grandkids to them, just as Justin had.

The first few days back in Carolina were rather hectic for Justin. He had his job at Pat's each day plus he was trying to spend time with Molly. Luckily, there were plenty of cousins around to make sure that Molly didn't get bored. Tee seemed to be making himself scarce, although Molly mentioned seeing him while Justin was at work.

During that first week, Justin was fairly sure that Tee was avoiding him which gave him a lot of time to think. He was still rather unsettled after his talk with Brian. A part of him had built up that relationship to the point where even he had to admit it was probably unrealistic. But the apparent reality was so different; he just couldn't reconcile the two.

Justin had to admit, at least to himself, that he was in love with Brian. Or, if he was honest, he was in love with the image of Brian that he had fabricated based on a dream he had. The real Brian just didn't fit into that image. Oh, he was hot. That much was for sure. If Justin had met him without a clue as to who he was, he would have fucked him in a heartbeat.

As Justin lay in bed, his thoughts chasing each other in circles through his mind, he heard Tee come in and get ready for bed. He usually waited until he thought Justin was asleep to come home.

"Am I imagining things or are you trying to avoid me?" Justin asked, rolling over to look at his brother as he undressed for bed.

Tee hesitated when Justin spoke, then shrugged. "Wasn't too sure what to say."

"How about I start then?" When all Tee did was shrug again, Justin plunged ahead. "I'm sorry about what happened at mom's. It not your fault that dad's such an asshole. I'm sorry if it sounded like I was blaming you for anything."

Tee swallowed hard, remembering how much it had hurt thinking he was being blamed. Instead of answering, he just nodded.

Justin decided that a change of topic was in order and there were some things he really wanted to know. Things about Brian… about Brian and Tee. Deciding to keep the information that Tee's Brian was the same guy as in his dream to himself for now, Justin sought a round about way to get the information he wanted.

"I went by Babylon that night you were there. I saw you up on the catwalk with your arms around some hot guy. Was that the Brian you keep telling me about?" That should be innocent enough.

Tee looked over and grinned slightly, "You should have told me you were there. I never saw you. And, yes, that was him. Think he's hot, huh?"

Justin smiled a bit, "Yeah, I'd fuck him. He any good?"

Tee just shrugged and gave Justin a wry grin, "So I hear. Rumor has it that he's had most of the guys in Babylon and is highly sought after."

That bit of information didn't really make Justin feel any better. "But what do you thing? Nothing like first hand experience."

Tee gave his brother a quizzical look. "We're just friends. You don't fuck your friends."

Justin snorted, "I seemed to remember you saying gay men couldn't be friends not to long ago. And what about that bet you made with him? He still doesn't know your name?"

Tee laughed a bit at that, "No, he doesn't. And I haven't been treated to dinner in NY yet either. As for being friends, you and Tris proved me wrong about that."

Taking a deep breath, Justin pondered what else he could ask without being to obvious in his search for information. "So, you planning to visit him in NY any time soon?"

Tee sighed, "No. I doubt it. He told me he didn't want to see me again."

Justin remembered Brian saying he'd throw Tee out because of the games 'they' were playing. "What'd you do this time?" Tee was notorious for his games.

Throwing his hands up in the air and dropping them, Tee groaned, "I'm not really sure. The only thing I can think of is when I called him my boyfriend in front of his friends. He told me later that I would ruin his reputation saying stuff like that. Maybe someone said something about it later that ticked him off." Tee hadn't been able to come up with any other explanation, even though that one sounded kind of weak to him.

Justin thought that now they were getting closer to the truth. There was something going on, Tee just didn't want to admit it. And the tidbit about Brian was appreciated as well. Apparently, Brian and his 'reputation' came first. Boyfriends were kept secret and not talked about. Justin wondered if that's how it had been between them. If only he could remember.

A soft "Night, Jus" floated through the air.

"Night, Tee." The thoughts began chasing themselves in circles again, getting nowhere fast.

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A few days later, Tee's grandparents called the family together and made an announcement. They were selling the big house and getting a condo. The outside upkeep would be taken care of for them and the condo would be much smaller and easier for Grandmother to take care of. They then asked that all the kids take some time during the next couple of weeks to go through the stuff in the closets, attic and garages and find anything of theirs that was still here and take care of it.

The next day, Justin and Molly went up to the guestroom to rummage through the closet. Justin had been storing his paintings up here as he finished them. He and Molly carried the dozen or so wrapped canvases back down to the basement. Of course, Molly insisted on unwrapping them so she could see what her brother had painted.

She told Justin how impressed she was as she unwrapped each one. There was one of the grandparents. One of Justin at the prom. One of Tee asleep with a kitten wrapped around his neck. The next one was a man in black that looked familiar.

"I know this guy." Molly exclaimed. "He was at the hospital when you were hurt. He doesn't live around here, does he?"

Justin looked up, startled. Molly had seen Brian at the hospital? "No, he lives in NY now. Are you sure you saw this man at the hospital?"

Molly nodded, "Of course, I'm sure. He's gorgeous, you know. I don't remember his name though. And he stopped coming after you woke up…Well, everyone stopped coming after you woke up. Dad didn't like your friends being there very much."

Justin felt his heart skip a beat, "His name is Brian." He said absently, stunned that Brian *had* been there. He had come after all. Then the rest of what Molly said registered.

"What do you mean, about Dad not liking my friends being there? Did he do something to make them stop coming?" He had always figured they had stopped because he'd been so unsociable at the time.

"Well…" Molly hesitated, as if not sure how much she should say.

"Come on, Mol. Don't get shy on me now." Justin chastised.

"Oh, alright. I overhead Mom and Dad arguing a few days after you woke up. Mom said she'd gone by some guy's house and told him that they didn't want him coming to the hospital anymore, but she didn't like doing it. She said the guy had seemed upset about it, although he'd agreed not to come back. Dad said good, he hated the guy. He also said that he'd told 'the others' not to come back by either. He didn't want anyone around that was going to remind you of your disgusting life beforehand….I think he was referring to the fact that you were gay." She added the last part with an apologetic smile.

Justin couldn't believe it. Could this be why Brian had never come by? Maybe he was wrong about him after all. At least about this part.

Then Molly seemed to remember something else, "Oh, I did see him again. Mom forgot something while we were visiting you at the hospital. It was kinda late and we were on our way home so we stopped and I ran up to get her stuff and he was there." She pointed to the guy in the painting. "He didn't go into your room, but he was watching through the window like the nurses did sometimes."

Justin stared at the painting as Molly prattled on about something else. He filed this tidbit away under 'confusing and conflicting information about Brian Kinney'.

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When Justin came home from work that evening, Tee was sitting in their apartment, smoking a joint. Something he never did at home. Justin walked in slowly, aware that something was up. "Where's Molly off to?" He asked.

Tee exhaled slowly. "Off with Lessa and Lawrence to see some movie." Was all he said. He was obviously stoned.

Justin walked over to where Tee was sitting on the bed. "You shouldn't be doing that here. What if the grandparent's decide to come down?"

Tee continued to stare straight ahead, not looking at Justin at all. "Come join me." He said, patting the bed next to him.

Justin sat cautiously on the bed, watching Tee's face for some sign of what was going through his mind.

Tee waved his hand toward the far end of the room. "I'm impressed." He said. "To think that you did that all from memory."

Justin looked across the room and the bottom dropped out of his stomach. He thought he'd put all the paintings away, but there, in plain view, hung the one he'd done of Brian so many months ago.

"Oh, don't worry. You hid it well. It was Molly who pulled it out. She wanted to show me all the great stuff you'd done." Tee answered the unasked question. Then asked one of his own. "So, were you ever planning to tell me? Or was I just supposed to go on, blithely unaware? Didn't you trust me enough to tell me the truth?"

Justin was beginning to feel a bit defensive. He knew he should have told Tee the truth, but he didn't like being the one in the wrong. He spoke sarcastically, "And what was I suppose to say…Tee, guess what…we have something else in common now. Your new boyfriend used to be my lover…no, scratch that…used to be my fuck buddy….is that what you wanted to hear?"

Tee wasn't in any condition to think logically about this, or he at least would have answered more calmly. "I wanted to hear the truth! If my boyfriend, or lover, or fuck-buddy or whatever the hell he is, was something to you, I deserve to know that. How long were you planning to pump me for information before saying something? And why? Why not just tell me the truth and ask me straight out what you wanted to know? Did you think I'd keep something like this a secret from you?"

Justin didn't answer right away. To be honest, he didn't know why he hadn't told Tee the truth. Maybe it was because Brian had come off as such an asshole and it was embarrassing to admit that this was the man he'd been dreaming about all this time. Or maybe, he couldn't bear the thought that Tee had something he had only thought he had had. Did he really want to know the truth about that?

"I guess this is the real reason Brian was so pissed at me, wasn't it? He saw you, maybe at Babylon that night, and somehow figured out that we knew each other. I guess I'd have thought I was the butt of some joke at that point too. Did you even care that I thought it was something I'd done? Or were you just glad that he'd thrown me out?"

Not hearing any response from his brother, Tee decided he must have hit the nail on the head. "Well, fuck you!" He snarled. He stood up, a bit unsteadily, then headed out the door.

Knowing Tee wouldn't go very far since his keys were on the desk, Justin made no move to stop him as Tee slammed his way out of the apartment. They could talk about this tomorrow, when Tee wasn't stoned and he, Justin, could figure out what was going on in his own head.

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Justin didn't see Tee again the next day, or the next. Molly said he'd come by while Justin was at work, then left saying he had plans.

A few days later, Justin had to borrow Uncle Rick's car to take Molly to the airport since Tee had taken off in their car again. When he got home, there was a note taped to the computer monitor with 'Justin' written on the outside of it. He pulled it off and opened it up.

'Jus, Sorry I lost it the other night. Sorry I didn't know who Brian was. Sorry if I hurt you. This is so fucked up. I'm going back where I belong. Sorry…I took the Saturn. Tee.'

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Justin spent the next two weeks, working extra shifts and bouncing off the walls at the apartment when he wasn't working. The whole family knew by now that Tee had left and wasn't planning on coming back, at least not any time soon. No one seemed to know where he'd gone though. What had he meant by 'back where I belong'?

The Cartoon Network was playing in the background as Justin looked over the course catalog for the next semester. He had been planning to move into the dorms in Columbia with Tee. They had gotten enough of a scholarship to cover tuition/books and worked enough to cover dorms and cafeteria. But now that Tee was gone, he was having trouble mustering any enthusiasm at going off to school and being on his own in a new place.

The phone rang several times before it registered with Justin and he answered. Immediately, an excited female voice began talking on the other end.

"Jus, you've got to help me! Conley's getting temporarily reassigned to Oregon for 6 months and they want me to go with them." Molly was nearing the hysterical mark. "It's my junior year and I don't want to spend half of it in some god-forsaken, back country, hick-ville. Please….you've got to save me!"

Justin wasn't sure what Molly expected him to do. "You could go live with Dad." He suggested, knowing the response he was bound to get.

"You have got to be insane if you think I'm going any where near that asshole after what he did." Molly was beyond indignant at the suggestion.

"Well, what do you expect me to do?" Justin asked a little exasperated.

Molly's voice changed to a wheedle, "You could come up here and stay with me. I mean, you said you weren't looking forward to school down there since Tee wasn't going. You could go to school here. There's even a great art school here. I'm sure you could get in if you applied."

Justin sighed, he couldn't believe he was even considering this. "Put Mom on the phone, brat."

When Jennifer came on the line, she sounded a bit distressed. "Justin, please don't worry about your sister. It won't kill her to move for a few months. Her friends will still be here when she gets back."

Taking a deep breath, Justin asked, "What if I wanted to stay with her and go to school up there? Would you have a problem with it?"

There was along pause on the other end of the phone. "Justin, if that's really what you want to do, we'd be more than happy to have you come home regardless of whether you stay with Molly or not."

"And if I wanted to stay with Molly? Would it cause problems with Dad? Would you be ok with it?" Justin asked hesitantly.

"You took great care of Molly when she was with you this summer. I'd have no reservations about leaving the two of you together. How your father feels about it isn't an issue. He hasn't asked to see Molly since the wedding." She paused for just a moment. "Are you really sure about this?"

Justin made up his mind. "Yes, I'm sure. I'll give my notice at Pat's and start packing."

A week later found Justin saying goodbye to his adopted family and heading back to the Pitts. In just one year, he'd come full circle.

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