Just Like Heaven

Chapter 5

The family gathered at Debbie's house for breakfast, although no one had any appetite. In a couple of hours, they would go to the hospital to say their final farewells to Brian before the life support system was removed.

"Do you think I'm doing the right thing?" Michael asked for the thousandth time.

"Michael, the doctors have all said that there's no indication that he'll ever wake from the coma. Brian wouldn't want to be dependent on machines to keep him alive." Ben said gently.

"We know it wasn't easy for you, sweetie, but we all support you." Emmett said.

The others all voiced their agreement as well. No one else there would have wanted to make that decision.

Gus, who had been the only one interested in eating, wandered in from the kitchen, putting a temporary halt to the conversation. No one wanted to upset the little boy by talking about his father dying.

"Mommy, I need to talk to Sunshine." Gus said.

Lindsay sighed, not wanting a repetition of the scene they'd had a few days ago. "Gus, we'll have to wait until later. Justin is at work right now."

Gus shook his head, a determined look on his face. "Daddy says he going away today. Sunshine promised to make him stay. I got to talk to him, now, Mommy."

Michael threw up his hands in disgust. "He's got the kid doing it now."

Emmett glared Michael into silence. "Gus, when did your daddy tell you that?"

Lindsay interrupted before Gus could answer. "He's been talking about seeing his father ever since we went to the loft that night. He even insisted on seeing Justin the other day. I had no idea that Justin would promise him something so outlandish."

Emmett waved Lindsay into silence then repeated his question to Gus.

Gus frowned at his mother then looked at Emmett. "He told me while I was eating breakfast. He told me to take care of Sunshine and not to be mad at him because he had to go away."

"Is your daddy still here, Gus?" Emmett asked, shushing the other adults who tried to interrupt.

"No, he said he had to keep Sunshine company." Gus said, then turned to his mother. "Sunshine's not at work, he's at the hospital. Daddy said he's been there all night."

Lindsay shook her head. "Emm, please don't encourage him. This is going to be hard enough as it is."

Emmett leaned back with a thoughtful look on his face. "Justin said he and Gus were the only ones that could see Brian. What if he was telling the truth?"

"Fuck, Emm, I can't believe you'd fall for that kid's nonsense. Brian's lying in a hospital bed, not haunting the loft or whatever the fuck Blondie thinks he's doing." Michael said. "I'm going to the hospital to say goodbye. I'll see you guys there."

Lindsay stood up also. "I think I'd better drop Gus off at preschool. I think this is going to be too much for him right now."

The rest of the group filed out the door, talking quietly. When they arrived at the hospital and walked into Brian's room, Justin was already there. The young man looked like he'd had a rough night and was still wearing the same clothes he'd had on the day before.

Emmett gave the others a knowing look before walking over and putting an arm around the distraught young man. "Have you been here all night, baby?"

Justin nodded numbly. "I keep thinking there's something I'm missing. If I could just figure out what it is…."

The others exchanged uneasy looks as they all remembered what Gus had said.

"Is Brian here?" Emmett asked.

Justin looked at the still figure in the bed, then gave Emmett a puzzled look. Finally, Emmett's meaning sunk in. "You believe me?" He whispered.

"Well, let's just say I'm leaning a whole lot further on the belief side than the disbelief side." Emmett said with a smile.

Michael huffed in disgust. "Believe what you want, Emm, but Brian's in that bed; not floating around somewhere."

No one else made a comment, but there were quite a few apprehensive glances around the room.

"Maybe I'd better go." Justin said, feeling decidedly out of place with Brian's family here.

Emmett followed Justin into the hallway and walked with him to a nearby waiting area. "Just ignore Michael, baby. This is really hard on him."

Justin nodded sadly. "I don't want to lose him, Emmett." He looked up as Brian joined them. "I don't know what to do to stop it though."

Emmett noticed the direction Justin was looking. "He's here, isn't he?"

"Yeah, right in front of us." Justin smiled slightly. "He says he knew if anyone fell for this kind of bullshit, it would be you."

"I believe in having an open mind." Emmett replied.

They both looked up as Michael walked into the room. "The nurse is ready, Emm, if you want to say goodbye."

With Justin's assurance that he'd be okay, Emmett joined the rest of the family. Michael and Justin stared at each other for a long moment. "I didn't want to ever have to do this." Michael said in a broken voice. "I feel like I'm letting him down."

Justin looked off to the side for a moment, then gave Michael a wan smile. "He understands, Michael. He's knows you're doing the best you can for him, just like you promised."

Michael looked slightly relieved. "Why don't you come inside with the rest of us?" He offered. "It won't be long before…"

Justin nodded in understanding when Michael couldn't finish. Brian followed silently as they returned to the room.

As the nurse began the process of removing Brian from life support, Emmett began crying and fled from the room, unable to watch. Ted left to comfort his friend. One by one, the others filed out as well, not wanting to witness that final painful moment.

In the end, only Justin and Michael were left as the hum of the machines died down.

Justin's eyes filled with tears as he watched Brian grow fainter. "Brian… I love you." He managed to say before Brian faded completely.

Michael put a hand on Justin's shoulder, squeezing slightly as the heart monitor slowed. He'd finally accepted that maybe Justin had experienced something he couldn't understand. Whatever had happened, he could see the pain he felt reflected in the blond's face.

As the heart monitor flat-lined, Justin completely broke down, throwing himself across Brian's chest and begging him not to go. As much as Michael would have liked to do the same, he had to be the strong one for once. He gently pulled Justin up, pausing as Justin gave Brian a kiss goodbye; the only kiss they'd ever shared.

Justin straightened up, trying to pull himself together. They stood lost in their own thoughts as the nurse cut the heart monitor off and left the two men alone.

Michael held Brian's hand, idly stroking the back of it. "I'm glad he had someone to talk to these last few weeks."

Justin looked up in surprise. "I'm glad I got the chance to know him. Even if it was just for such a short time." He walked to the other side of the bed and held Brian's other hand.

Michael swallowed hard. "About the loft---"

"I'll move out just as soon as I can find another place." Justin hastened to say.

"Take your time. It's not a big deal."

"It won't be the same without him there."

"No, it won't." Michael agreed.

Silence descended again. Suddenly, Justin jumped, startled. "Michael, did you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

"Brian; he squeezed my hand."

"You're just imagining it---" Michael began, then stopped as he felt something as well. "Holy shit, he did."

Justin put a hand to Brian's wrist. "Michael, there's a pulse. He's still alive!"

Brian stirred in the bed, coughing slightly.

"I'll get the doctor." Michael cried excitedly, running for the door. By the time Michael returned with a nurse in tow, Justin had backed against the wall by the door, a devastated look on his face. Fearing the worst, Michael looked at the bed.

"Mikey?" Brian's voice rasped.

Michael rushed over, ecstatic that his friend was awake and talking. When he looked up again, Justin was gone. "Where'd Justin go?" He asked, confused.

"Who?" Brian asked.

Michael focused back on his friend. "Justin. He was just here, but now he's gone."

"Who's Justin?"

~ * ~

Michael cautiously walked through the open loft door. "Justin?"

A young woman stuck her head out of the bedroom. "He's not here. I'm Daphne, his friend. I was just packing his stuff up for him."

"Where is he?" Michael asked, then introduced himself almost as an afterthought.

"He's over at my place." Daphne said, continuing to pack the clothes from the closet. "I don't think he could bear to come back here after what happened."

"He told you?"

"That Brian woke up but didn't remember him? Yeah."

Michael sat on the bed. "Do you believe him? About Brian, I mean?"

Daphne paused as she debated how to answer. Justin had told her about Michael also. "I wasn't so sure at first. But there were just too many coincidences. Someone - fate - whatever - went to a lot of trouble to make sure those two met."

"Then why doesn't Brian remember him?" Michael asked. He hadn't been able to get Justin's shattered expression out of his mind. The part of him that lived through comic books wanted to believe that his super-hero could have defeated the odds and escaped his comatose prison.

"How should I know?" Daphne asked. "If you're so interested, why don't you asked that psychic Justin talked too, Mysterious Somebody."

Michael nodded absently. "Maybe I'll do that."

~ * ~

"Well, here we are; home, sweet home." Michael said cheerily as he and Brian walked into the loft.

Brian entered slowly, looking around as if seeing the loft for the first time.

"Brian, is something wrong?"

Brian turned slowly, taking in the whole loft. "Did you move something?"

"I don't think so." Michael said, glancing around. "But I told you about that guy your mom rented the place to. He may have."

Brian shook his head, a puzzled expression on his face. "No, it's not that. Something's… missing."

"He could have taken something by accident, I guess. If you figure it out, just let me know. I've got the address he's staying at."

Brian nodded absently.

Michael carried Brian's bag up to the bedroom and set it out of the way. When he turned back, Brian was still standing in the center of the room, looking slightly lost. "Do you want me to stay? We could order some Thai or something."

At the mention of Thai, Brian glanced sharply at the sofa, then shook his head. "No, I think I'll make an early night of it, Mikey. Go on home to your hubby."

After a bit more convincing on Brian's part, Michael reluctantly left. Once alone, Brian aimlessly wandered around, reacquainting himself with his home. No matter what he did though, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was off.

~ * ~

"Hey, Jus. What 'cha doing?" Daphne asked as she entered the kitchen and joined her roommate at the table.

Justin tore off another sheet of paper and tossed it in the trash. "Trying to write a resignation letter without sounding like a total retard."

"Why are you resigning? You haven't even been there two months yet."

Justin rubbed a hand over his face. "I cant' keep doing this, Daph. Seeing him everyday and knowing… it's just too hard."

"So you're just going to quit and run away? The Justin I used to know wouldn't give up so easily."

"Yeah, well, he's not here anymore."

Daphne snorted in irritation, then rose to answer a knocking at the door.

Justin looked up in surprise as Michael and Emmett joined him at the table. "What brings you guys here?" A moment of panic seized him. "Brian's okay, isn't he?"

"He's fine, baby." Emmett said. "Well, fine physically anyway."

"What do you mean?" Justin asked, his concern dampened but not completely gone.

"Since he got out of the hospital, he's been… well, not quite himself." Michael said.

"They say that when people face life-altering events, it can change them." Daphne said.

"I think it's more than that." Michael said hesitantly. It had taken him most of the week to admit to himself that maybe what Brian needed was the young man sitting across the table from him.

"We talked to Mysterious Marilyn." Emmett said. "She thinks that fate has been trying to set right something that went wrong."

"I thought we had." Justin said morosely. "But he doesn't remember any of it."

"We have an idea that might fix things." Michael said. "But we're going to need your help."

~ * ~

"I thought Justin was supposed to be here by now." Michael shouted to Emmett, trying to be heard above the usual din of Babylon. "I don't think we're going to be able to keep Brian here much longer. He's getting antsy."

"I'll go outside and call. Maybe he just got held up." Emmett yelled back.

Once outside, Emmett paced the sidewalk in front of the dance club as he waited for Justin to answer his cell. "Baby, where are you? You should have been here half an hour ago."

Justin sighed as he watched Emmett from the safety of his car. He'd been sitting there for an hour trying to work up the nerve to go inside, but had failed miserably. "I'm about a block away, Emm." Justin stood and waved at his friend.

"Well, you better get your bubble butt over here before your stud-muffin decides to make a break for it. I don't think he's having much fun inside."

Justin put his phone away and walked down the sidewalk, trying to tell himself that this wasn't a big mistake. He'd almost reached the corner to cross over when Brian strode out of Babylon, Michael in tow. Justin stopped as he watched Brian saunter down the steps and over to his new Jeep. It was so much like the first time he'd seen Brian, so many years ago, that Justin was momentarily frozen in place.

By the time Justin recovered his wits, Brian was standing in front of him. "You're late."

"What?" Justin asked. Had Brian figured out what his friends were up to?

"We were supposed to meet here four years ago. What took you so long?"

Justin stared at Brian, hope and fear at war on his face. "You remember?"

"Do fortune tellers talk in riddles?"

Justin reached out, his hand shaking, and gently touched Brian's cheek. His breath caught when he felt the warm skin under his palm. "You're solid. I thought that you might…"

Brian pulled Justin close, wrapping his arms around him. "Completely tangible."

Chuckling (partly in relief), Justin rubbed up against Brian suggestively. "Definitely solid."

Brian sucked in a sharp breath. "And getting more so by the second."

They stood for a long minute, just holding each other. "Where do we go from here?" Justin finally asked, not relinquishing his hold on Brian.

"Back to the loft so I can fuck you into the mattress."

"And toss me out on my ass in the morning?" Justin asked cautiously, pulling back slightly, but not completely letting go.

Brian touched their foreheads together and said softly, "Every time I walk into the loft, I look for something that's suppose to be there, but isn't. Now I know what's missing."

Grinning, Justin threw his arms around Brian. "And you said you weren't romantic."

"Can we go home and fuck now?" Brian asked, tongue in cheek.

"Home?" Justin asked, his heart in his throat. Had Brian meant to say it that way or had it just been a slip?

"It's taken me this long to get you to clean up after yourself. I don't have the patience to train someone else."

"Can I eat on the couch?"

"At the coffee table." Brian corrected.

Justin grinned. "Can we fuck on the couch?

"And on the coffee table."

"And under the easel."

"And on the chaise."

"Dining room table."

"Kitchen counter."

"In the shower."

"Floor."

"Bed."

"Mmm, unimaginative, but if you insist."

"So, now that we've got tonight planned out, what will we do tomorrow?"

Brian smirked. "I would say that this is the beginning a beautiful relationship, but everyone knows I don't do those."

"If I can learn to clean up after myself, you can learn to do relationships." Justin said with a smug grin, then his eyes lit up. "How about the back of the Jeep?"

"Back might be a little cramped, but the front seats recline."

Justin grinned and began to pull Brian across the street. "See? You're already learning to compromise."

As they approached the Jeep, Justin turned toward Brian, his expression suddenly concerned. "Brian, this fate thing - do you think we got it right this time?"

Brian pushed Justin against the side of the Jeep and kissed him until they were both breathless. "Couldn't be any more right, Sunshine."

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