Molly's Thoughts


They're at it again. Right there on the couch.

Do I really have to see this?

I mean, it is kind of interesting and all. But really, they're as bad as Candace Watson and that disgusting Sean Forbes after lunch in the locker commons.

All I want to do is get my books and every day I have to walk right past the spit-swapping patrol.

So I want to go to the mall and get that new CD I've been waiting for and what do I get but: "Not today, dear, your brother and Brian are joining us for dinner."

Like that's such a big deal.

Okay, I did like it when Brian took us out to that fancy pizza place. Tiffany was so jealous. She thinks Brian is totally hot.

She doesn't have to watch him drooling all over her brother.

Justin's way worse, though, the way he kind of hangs all over Brian and keeps touching him. It weirds me out sometimes.

At least Brian's not a total freak like that violin guy. What was that about? Sometimes I think that baseball bat scrambled Justin's brains more than anyone realizes.

I mean, hello.

I know they all think I'm a clueless kid but I do live here and I'm not deaf. I heard all the stuff Dad said about Justin and Brian. It's not like I'm stupid.

Not that I really get the whole deal.

So what if Justin kisses boys instead of girls. I don't see where that's such a terrible thing. At least he and Brian love each other, even when they aren't together.

Not like Mom and Dad.

I didn't pay attention to that stuff most of the time, but even I could tell that they just sort of were used to each other.

Dad was hardly ever around, and when he was, he was always watching TV or off in the den doing paperwork.

He treated me pretty good, but he was always on Justin

about stuff - doing chores around the house, making friends, being responsible.

Justin's really nice to me most of the time, even if I'd never tell him I think so. He used to laugh all the time, and we'd hang out. He got along great with Mom, but Dad seemed to always make him sad.

I remember once, before we found out about Brian. Justin was working really hard on a drawing for Mom and Dad's anniversary and he lost track of time. He was late for dinner and Dad spent the meal giving Justin a hard time, telling him he was irresponsible and a disappointment.

Mom tried to settle him down, but Dad was on a roll - he gets like that sometimes - and he just kept yelling at Justin.

Justin just sat there, his head up, looking at Dad, accepting everything without defending himself. I could tell that it was really hurting Justin, but he just sat there. He didn't eat anything, which is so not Justin.

When supper was finally over he cleared his plate and did all his chores without saying a word. Then he looked at Mom with a really sad face and said he was sorry.

He took his backpack and went upstairs really slow. I went to see him later and the drawing was all neatly folded and put away in this big art book with all the other things he had drawn but never given to Dad.

That weekend he went to the mall and bought an anniversary present.

So it's not like Dad and Justin got along all that great before Brian. When Dad found out he completely freaked - like total meltdown freak out. He was pretty scary.

Then Mom freaked out back at him and then Justin didn't live at home any more. It's kind of selfish, but I was glad he was gone. It was not a lot of fun listening to all the screaming and everything. Especially after Dad left and Mom and I had to move.

I kind of hated Justin for a while.

Then he got hurt at his prom and everyone went nuts again. I mean, I didn't want him to be hurt, but I didn't want everyone to be so mad all the time either.

So I was glad when he went back to Brian's.

I like Brian. And he is kind of nice when he's not being all kissyface with Justin. He never talks to me like a dumb kid, either.

So then Justin goes and does something to mess everything up.

Give me a break.

At least he bought a clue and fixed things with Brian.

Now maybe we can just be normal for a while instead of like something on some dumb TV show.

And anyway, Brian promised to take Justin and me to the mall this weekend.

I bet I can get him to buy me that new CD.

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