Be Careful What You Wish For
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"No way! It's not happening! I'm not going out with another one!" Brian insisted as he paced the library. It was barely noon and they had just finished up with their meeting with Lyle when Justin had suggested another "date".
"But Brian, how're you going to find a partner if you don't meet new people. I promise this one won't be dressed up in a costume," Justin told him, struggling to keep his laughter inside. "Kevin is a really great guy. I've known him for years and he's just as normal as I am."
"Well, considering that I'm beginning to think you're insane after the last two guys you threw at me, that's not helping your argument," Brian replied dryly.
"Look, you just got done telling Lyle that you're planning on settling down like John requested. I don't think now's the time to stop your search," Justin pointed out. "Just give Kevin a chance. If you don't like him, we'll try to come up with another way, okay?"
Brian wanted to object, but unfortunately for him, Justin was right. He had less than a year to find a suitable mate, if there was such a thing, and work out a partnership that he could live with. Telling his potential mate the reason behind their partnership was out of the question. The last thing he needed was some gold-digging fag looking to score big. So that meant that he needed time to build up some kind of relationship, God he hated that word, to pull off his plans for the future.
"Fine, call good old Kevin and set something up. But if this one turns out to be anything like Mutt and Jeff from last night, I'm going to take it out on your ass." Brian saw a gleam in Justin's eyes and growled. "And not in a good way."
"Yes sir." Justin saluted Brian before heading off to his room to give his friend Kevin a call. He wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to hide his amusement.
Trying to find Brian a partner was a lot more fun than he originally thought it would be. D'Arcy was a bit of a problem since his sensitive nature had required him to call twice already that morning to find out why Brian left so quickly, but Shawn was mildly amused by Brian's sudden illness. Now it was all left to Kevin, and he would be perfect for the final performance.
Brian climbed out of the limo at exactly 7:55. He was meeting Kevin for drinks at a small, out of the way bar at 8:00. He reminded Justin once again to sit in the car and wait for him, before walking through the doors. The bar wasn't too crowded and when Brian spotted the back of a head sitting alone at a small table in the corner, his gut told him he had found his "date". He took a deep breath before making his way across the room. He stopped at the table and looked down at the man sitting there.
"Brian?" Kevin asked as he took in the man before him.
"I take it you're Kevin," Brian said as he took a seat. This time it seemed that Justin had been right on target. Kevin was dressed casually in jeans and a pullover. He had medium brown hair with just a touch of highlights, nice brown eyes, and looked very rugged and masculine. In fact, if Brian were to see him across the dance floor in Babylon, there was no doubt that he'd be good for the night's entertainment. "Thanks for meeting me."
"No thanks necessary. Justin's description was right on target. He told me you'd be the best looking guy in the room," Kevin replied, laying the flattery on pretty thick. He signaled for the waiter. "What would you like to drink?"
"Jim Beam, straight up."
The two men spent the next hour talking about their careers and business in general. Kevin was an artist, but he had a profound knowledge in advertising and spent the last couple of years working part time in the art department of a local ad agency. They each had a taste for the finer things in life, and Kevin's knowledge of Prada and Armani was almost as staggering as Brian's. Even his views on monogamy weren't what Brian expected. He felt that an occasional trick now and then wouldn't hurt a relationship as long as both parties were careful. In fact, Kevin seemed just about perfect for what Brian needed. Unfortunately, nothing was ever perfect.
"So, Justin tells me that you're looking to settle down with a partner," Kevin said as he finished off his drink and signaled for another one.
"Yeah, I figured since I'm in my thirties now it was time to look for something a little more stable," Brian lied, trying not to choke on his words. "I can't be cruising the bars for the rest of my life."
"That's so true. I was just telling my friend the other day that there's more to life than drinking and fucking. There comes a time when a man needs to settle down and start his family," Kevin replied, seemingly oblivious to Brian's stunned expression. "I've always wanted three kids, but I'm willing to settle for two. I was an only child and lonely as can be when I was growing up. I refuse to put my son or daughter through that. I already have the names picked out for the first one. Stephanie if it's a girl and of course Kevin Jr. if it's a boy. You can choose the names the second time around. Now I don't mind cutting back my hours at work, but I refuse to do all the work. I'll expect you to take care of half the diaper changes and at least some of the feeding…Brian, are you all right? You don't look so good."
"Um…excuse me. I'll be right back. I just need to use the men's room," Brian stammered as he rose quickly and headed towards the back of the bar.
Kevin chuckled to himself as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell. He waited patiently for Justin to answer. "Hey Jus, I suspect that your friend is looking for the back door as we speak. You owe me big time for this one. I could've easily taken this one home for an enjoyable evening of mindless sex," Kevin teased.
"I'm sure you could've, but I think Tony would have a problem with that and considering that you've only been living together for six months, you probably shouldn't push your luck," Justin reminded him with a smile.
"Yeah, I guess you're right," Kevin sighed. "But somehow I have a feeling that one night with Brian would've been worth it."
"You have no idea," Justin said with longing. He looked up just as Brian was coming around the corner. "I better go. Your date's making his way to the car as we speak. Thanks for helping me out. I owe you one."
"You owe me more than one. Good luck."
Justin quickly put his cell phone away just as Brian ripped open the door. "Let's get the fuck out of here," he demanded as he slouched down on the seat and leaned his head back, closing his eyes.
"You were in there for a long time. I guess things went okay. I knew Kevin would be perfect for you," Justin said, earning himself an evil glare from Brian.
"Perfect for me? Are you out of your fucking mind?" Brian snapped angrily.
"What's wrong? I thought he'd be exactly what you're looking for. He's good looking, has great taste, he's very intelligent. What's not to like?" Justin asked innocently.
"He already named our first fucking kid!" Brian exclaimed. "I can't believe I let you talk me into this!"
Justin had to struggle to hold back his laughter. Kevin had assured him that he'd find a way to scare Brian off, but apparently he underestimated his friend's acting abilities. Kevin didn't even like children. "I'm sorry, Brian. I really thought that he was the one. So what's next?"
"I don't know, but you're not setting me up on anymore dates," Brian insisted. "I'll give it some more thought later, after you're done sucking me off."
"Sucking you off?"
"Hey, you owe me after making me go through something so traumatic. Can you imagine me changing a diaper?" Brian replied indignantly.
Justin didn't respond. Instead he sat back in his seat and anxiously waited for them to get back home. If Brian thought he was owed a blow job, who was Justin to argue?
One blow job and one good fuck later, Brian and Justin were lying side by side in Brian's bed, trying to catch their breath. Justin was trying to think of a way to get Brian to see that they'd be perfect together when the older man suddenly jumped out of bed.
"I've got it!"
"Got what?" Justin asked in confusion.
"The perfect plan. You and me," Brian replied.
"You and me?" Justin prodded, feeling his heart rate pick up speed. Was it possible that Brian finally realized how good they could be as a couple?
"Yeah, you and me. You could be my partner. It's an ideal situation. Instead of going out looking for someone who would expect something from me, we could just pretend to be together until after the will is probated. There wouldn't be any hard feelings when we split up because you know it's not a real partnership." Brian paced the room, proud of his plan. "Why didn't I think of this before?"
The blood drained from Justin's face as Brian's words sunk in. Brian didn't suddenly realize that Justin was the one for him. He just realized that he'd be easy to pull off his charade with. "I…I don't know, Brian."
"Because that's crazy. No one's going to believe that we're a couple," Justin said, trying to find some way to convince Brian his plan wouldn't work. He couldn't think of one.
"Yes they will. We've already been fucking for the last week. They'll just think that we fell for each other in the process. I could even move my stuff into your room and make it look authentic. It'd be more believable than moving in with someone I hardly know," Brian pointed out. "Come on, Justin. You were willing to help me out before. Can't you see this is a better solution?"
Justin didn't know what to say. On one hand, he had to admit that the two of them falling for each other was a lot more believable than anything else they could come up with. On the other hand, he'd been hoping to have time to make Brian fall for him before he made his move. If they were to start actually living together, sharing the same space, sleeping in the same room, Justin had more of a chance of having his heart broken. He knew without a doubt that he was already falling for Brian as it was. Taking things to the next level, even if they were only pretending, was sure to give him the final push. Of course, if they were pretending to be together, that could work to his advantage. Maybe he could prove to Brian just how much they could have if they were a couple. That would be easier if they were living as one.
"So, what do you say?" Brian asked impatiently.
"I guess you've got yourself a partner," Justin said, hoping he was doing the right thing. "But we have to set down a few ground rules."
"Rules? Like what?"
"Well for starters, there'll be no tricking," Justin said, watching for signs of anger.
"No tricking?" Brian asked in horror.
"None. I refuse to let the house staff feel sorry for me because I have a partner who can't keep his pants on. These people are like family to me, and if I'm going to be forced to lie to them, I don't want them to be whispering behind my back." Justin watched Brian as he thought about Justin's request.
Brian thought about giving up tricking with a heavy heart, but then he realized that he wouldn't really be denied. He'd have Justin in his bed every night, tending to his needs. "All right, no tricking. But then you better make sure you put out enough. I have a very high sexual appetite. What else?"
Justin let the thrill of passion wash over him as he thought about feeding Brian's appetite every night. "We have to act like a couple…at least when others are around. That means hand holding, smiles across the room, and flowers on occasion."
"Yeah, you know those pretty bright things with all the petals? A dozen or so every couple of weeks should be enough." Justin could've sworn he saw Brian wince.
"Fine, hand holding, flowers, smiles. Got it. Is that all?" Brian was quickly losing his excitement over his perfect plan.
"One more thing," Justin smiled, wondering if he was pushing too hard. "I imagine that you'll be flying back to Pittsburgh on occasion to visit your friends. I want to go with you." He waited until he saw the relief on Brian's face before continuing. "As your partner."
"As my partner? You mean you expect me to let everyone back home think we're together, too?"
"Of course. If the people in my life are going to be fooled, so are the people in yours. Besides, what if we told them the truth and one of them called or came to visit and let something slip? We have to make this look real. Otherwise Lyle could find out and you'll be left with nothing," Justin explained. "Then this would all be for nothing."
As much as he hated to admit it, Brian could see his point. He could just see Mikey coming to Denver and ruining everything with his big mouth. "Yeah, I guess you have a point. That's it, right?"
"That's all I can think of," Justin replied with a smile. "Is there anything you'd like to add?"
"Other than that putting out thing, I'm good," Brian smirked. "In fact, maybe we should work on that one right now. Make sure we have it down right."
Justin shivered at the lust in Brian's eyes. "Hey, you know what they say. Practice makes perfect."
"I think this arrangement is going to work out just fine," Brian replied before pulling Justin to him in a deep kiss, ending any further conversation.
Justin woke up before the sun the next morning. He'd been having a dream about John that seemed so real that it took a moment for him to remember that the older man was gone. With a heavy heart, he climbed out of bed, careful not to wake Brian, and headed down to John's bedroom. He took a deep breath before opening the door and walking inside. He was immediately overcome with sadness and covered his mouth to stifle the sob that tore through him. In the last two days his mind was so focused on Brian and the will, that he hadn't allowed himself to spend too much time on his friend, but now the anguish and tears ripped through him forcefully, causing him to sink to his knees. He missed John so much. Missed the love they had for each other, and the strength that John always showed him. He couldn't stand the thought of never seeing him again.
Once the tears started, Justin was unable to stop them. He pulled himself up off the ground and walked over to the bed. He stood there for a moment, his hand resting on the pillows that remained untouched, before pulling back the covers and climbing inside. He felt closer to John as he lay down in his bed. How many nights had they lain together, talking about the future and trying to forget about the horrible disease that was slowly eating away at the man John used to be? He'd promised John on so many of those nights that he wouldn't spend his days grieving, but how could he not? How could he not grieve for the man he loved? The man who took him in when no one else wanted him? The tears continued as Justin lay there, memories of happier times running through his brain making it almost impossible to breathe. He remembered promising to go on. To continue on with the life that John had helped him begin, but he didn't know if he could do it. Going on seemed so much harder than giving in to the grief that was eating away at him.
Brian woke up with a start and reached for Justin, only to find his side of the bed empty. He figured the blond had gone to his own bed and was about to go back to sleep when he heard the faint sound of sobbing coming from down the hallway. Knowing exactly where the sounds were coming from, Brian got up and threw on his robe before making his way down to John's room. He listened to the soft sobs that were coming from the room as he quietly opened the door and went inside. He spotted Justin immediately and walked over to the bed, climbing in and taking Justin in his arms.
"Shhhh, it's okay," Brian said softly.
"I miss him so much, Brian. Everything that I have and everything that I am I owe to him," Justin cried as he buried his head in Brian's chest. "I knew he was going to leave me, but I never realized how hard it was going to be to say goodbye. I don't know what I'm going to do without him."
Brain felt a pulling on his heartstrings as he listened to the despair in Justin's voice. He wished there was something he could say or do to make everything better, but he was out of his league. He never had to say goodbye to someone who was so important to him before. Losing John was sad, but he didn't have the emotional connection with him that Justin had. "You'll go on, just like he would've wanted you to. You'll finish school and take the art world by storm, proving to everyone that you're as talented as he knew you were. You'll make him proud, and I'll be there to help you get it all together."
Brian continued to hold Justin as he settled down and finally succumbed to sleep, wondering if he really had what he needed to help Justin through his grief.
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