Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Yesterday

"Daph, please. You have to." Justin was sitting on the end of his best friend's bed, watching her apply nail polish to her pinky. He had told his mom he was spending the night with Daphne, but he had other plans. Plans he didn't want his mother, and especially his father, to know about. He was seventeen, and needed to finally explore the realities of an undeniable longing that he couldn't explain.

Daphne blew her warm breath onto her fingernails. Not even bothering to look at Justin, she spoke. "Justin. If I take you to Liberty Avenue, we'll both be dead. If my parents don't kill me, yours will." Then she looked directly into his blue eyes. "And you, too. Besides, what will I tell my mom when you're not here in the morning? And what do I tell your mom if she calls here? And it's pouring down rain out there. You'll get soaked and look like a drowned chicken, then I can visit you in the hospital when you get pneumonia. And what if, God forbid, some pervert tries to hurt you. Then what? Huh? Then I can come visit you in the hospital when you lay bleeding on the..."

"Daphne!" Justin didn't realize the tone of his voice until he saw his friend's eyes wide with surprise. "You're overreacting. I don't understand you. It's barely drizzling, I won't look like a drowned chicken and I won't catch pneumonia. And I think I know enough about people to tell if someone is going to hurt me. There won't be any hospital visits, for anything. I promise. Look, just tell your mom I had to go home early because I forgot my homework or something and tell mine I'm in the shower and I'll call her back. Please." He couldn't believe she was giving him such a hard time all of a sudden. When he first brought the subject up, she was eager to help him.

"Okay. Why do I let you talk me into these things? It's like when we were eleven. Remember? We rode our bikes over to old man Melvin's house at midnight, just because some boys dared you. You had to prove you weren't a scaredy-cat . All of a sudden, he was standing at the corner of his garage with that huge, monster dog of his. What was his name? Oh, yeah, Killer. If I wasn't there to see him first and warn you, well, we definitely wouldn't be here talking about...THIS." Giving a big sigh and shaking her head, Daphne grabbed her keys. "Come on, let's go. This may be the one stupidest thing I've ever done." She turned suddenly and stared at her friend. Pointing a freshly polished finger into his chest, she smiled. "You owe me so, so big for this."

A half hour later, Daphne pulled her car over to the curb and stopped. She had never been in this part of the city she grew up in. Looking at her friend with concern on her face, she asked, "Are you sure this is what you want, Justin? We can go back now. Maybe get some ice cream or something. I'll even watch Yellow Submarine with you, even though it'll only be my hundredth time."

Justin got out of the car and walked around to the driver's side window. "I can't go back now, Daphne. This is the only place I can find what I need, what I want. Thanks for being such a good friend, even if you are a pain sometimes. Love ya."

"Yeah, you, too, Justin. Like it'll matter when we're dead." She put her dark hand softly on his pale one. "Be careful, ok?" Then added hopefully, "Look, how 'bout if I wait here for a while, and if you change your mind, just come back here...."

"Go on home, Daph. I don't want you hanging out here alone, this time of night. I'll be fine." Then he looked up at the sky and smiled. "It's not even raining." Daphne started to say something, but let it go. If she hadn't talked him out of this by now, she never would. She gave Justin a smile and drove slowly into the night. Justin watched the taillights merge into the other traffic. Unconsciously, he pulled his jacket tighter around him and let out a breath. "The first day of the rest of my life," he murmured to no one in particular as he watched two men stop in the middle of the sidewalk and kiss. They caught him staring and smiled as they turned and walked up the steps of a noisy bar.

****

Justin spent the next hour walking up and down the brightly lit, yet unfamiliar, street, aware of the eyes that were following him as he moved amongst the crowd. People, mostly men, were everywhere. "Why didn't I let Daphne stop me? I'm not ready for this. Meathook, BoyToy? It's not like I thought it would be; that's for sure. Daph would come pick me up if I called her. I bet she's sitting a few blocks away in some grocery store parking lot just waiting for my call. But I can't. I have to do this. Not everyone here can be a jerk or a freak."

Although the rain had stopped, the streets were still wet and small puddles dotted the road. Justin stopped under a lamp post to further survey his surroundings, wondering for a second time if he should call Daphne and give up his quest, at least for tonight. He saw, or maybe felt, a subtle change in the light and shadow that only an artist would pick up. He raised his eyes in time to see a tall, slender man getting into a black Jeep. Justin couldn't believe how beautiful he was and stared straight at him.

The dark haired man looked up as if he felt the eyes on him. He was drawn to the hazy yellow light given off by the street lamp in the damp, heavy air.

"He's just a kid," Brian thought, but something made him move away from the Jeep and walk toward the blonde angel in the light. He had to make sure this wasn't just a vision induced by the drugs and booze he had consumed throughout the evening. And if he was a vision, he wanted to make sure he remembered what he took, so he could have the same vision again.

Brian carefully approached the vision, afraid it would evaporate into the haze. The first thing he noticed was his eyes. They were the bluest eyes he had ever seen. Blond lashes rested softly on his cheeks every time he blinked. Brian hesitated before speaking. Finding his voice, he asked, "Had a busy night?"

When the kid answered, Brian was mesmerized by his full, strawberry-colored lips and stifled a laugh when the blonde mentioned the leather bar, Meat Hook. When the boy said he wasn't headed any place special, Brian said softly, "I could change that."

Justin looked into the hazel eyes, judging the man whom he knew was going to be his first lover. There was no doubt that he was beautiful. But there was something else, too. Perhaps, a vulnerability that he was trying very hard to hide. Whatever it was that he saw, Justin knew he could trust this man with his life. He felt it deep down inside like a hug or hot cocoa by the fireplace after playing in the snow. Justin smiled and gave a slight nod.

The man smiled back at him and turned towards the jeep, expecting the young blond to follow, even though no further words were spoken. Justin settled into the passenger seat, noting the angry looks aimed his way from the three men standing on the sidewalk, obviously upset at the sudden change in plans.

"Get a ride with Ted," the man said calmly as he drove off.

Justin sat quietly, looking out of the window at the unfamiliar scenery. The silence was making him nervous and his companion didn't seem to be in a talkative mood. Finally, unable to stand it any longer, he commented, "Your friends didn't seem very happy with you, just now."

"They'll get over it."

"My name's Justin."

"Uh huh."

Justin shook his head. "That went well," he thought to himself.

Finally the Jeep stopped in front of an old brick building. He had heard that these old buildings had been turned into expensive loft-type apartments.

His companion walked up to the door then turned to him, nodded and went in. Justin was right behind him, suddenly not so sure of what he was about to do. It's not that he was scared...well, maybe a little. But mostly, he was...thinking about how his life would forever be changed after tonight.

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