Truth Be Told
Part Five
Thanks to Linda, my new beta. This will be an easier read because of her wonderful help.
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Justin, you were so tired. I just wanted us to have a quiet evening together with no stress, Ethan tried to explain.
What did you tell my mother? Demanded Justin.
I told her you were out, said Ethan, looking to the floor.
You had no right to make that decision for me. Of course, I would have talked to her, Justin said, tears filling his eyes again. But now, I might never get the chance.
Justin, I had no idea this could happen. I just wanted
Its not about what you wanted, fumed Justin. Im going back to Molly now.
We cant leave things like this. We have to talk, pleaded Ethan.
Get out of here, Ethan. I cant stand to look at you right now, let alone talk to you, said Justin, before he went down the hall.
Ethan grabbed his jacket and looked at Daphne.
I may have made some mistakes over the last few weeks, but I didnt mean any harm tonight. He hasnt been sleeping well. He has nightmares. His headaches are getting very frequent and his hand is bothering him. I just wanted him to have one night with no work, no art projects, no comic book, no studying, no obligations, and no stress. I made dinner because hes not eating much lately, and I rented a boring movie. I was hoping he would fall asleep fifteen minutes into it and get some rest, explained Ethan.
No matter what you think of me, Daphne, I do care about him. So could someone please keep an eye on him? Hes getting another headache, continued Ethan, looking at Brian.
I dont need you to tell me about Justin or the after effects of the prom. In fact, I probably should have explained a few things to you weeks ago. It might have helped. Does he have his pills with him?
Im not sure if he grabbed them when we got the call or not. Ill go home and check. If they are there, Ill bring them, Ethan said before leaving the waiting room.
Well, I guess even the violin maestro isnt perfect either, smirked Brian. You are quite a little firecracker, arent you? Brian said, putting an arm around Daphne.
Daphne glared at him, Ive wanted to tear into you for almost two years now.
What the hell did I do?
Theres a long list, but for now I have two words for you-- birthday present.
Brian winced.
Everyone laughed. Shes got you there, asshole, smiled Mel.
For someone who is obviously very intelligent and extremely successful at his job, you sure do spend a great deal of time acting dumber than a rock.
Excuse me? gasped Brian.
And what is worse, youre a coward too. You are so scared of your feelings for Justin and his feelings for you, that you throw him to that that... Daphne paused and searched for the right word to describe Ethan. HIM she finally finished, pointing to the door where he had just left.
What makes you think you know how I feel? asked Brian.
Daphne smiled. You can try to fool yourself, Brian. And you can fool Justin because he doesnt really remember. And you can pretend to everyone else because they werent there, so they didnt see, but I was there and I saw, so you cant deceive me. You love Justin. But more importantly, you are IN love with Justin.
Brian lifted his eyes and met Daphnes for a moment, then stared at the floor again.
The group sat quietly. Mel, Emmett, Ted, and Debbie were thrilled to see Brian Kinney put in his place by a teenage girl. Lindsay, Michael, Ben, and Vic were concerned.
Daphne softened her voice and sat next to Brian.
What I really dont understand is--why dont you just admit it and be happy? You were so happy that night. You were sober and happy.
Brian shifted in his chair again.
It was a beautiful sight. And your eyes . Ive always thought you have beautiful eyes, Brian. But that night they just sparkled, said Daphne choked up at the memory. Just like Justins.
You should have seen them Emmett. It was just like out of an old black and white movie, Daphne said. She smiled at Emmett who smiled back.
And you smiled. Not that smug shit-eating grin you usually have, but a real smile. Then you laughed and even giggled. Brian Kinney giggling. It was . Amazing.
Im not going to listen to this, said Brian as he started to leave. Justin is with Ethan now and hes better off.
Why are you so scared to be happy. The two of you could be happy. You just have to let it happen.
Brian stopped and looked at her, Its not that simple.
It could be.
No, it couldnt. You think I have to let it happen. Well, I did. A year ago I turned thirty. I wasnt very happy about it but after some thought I decided to take a step. So I got dressed up and I did it.
Youre right. That dance was a declaration of love, to me as much as Justin. Ill even admit that I was truly happy, for the first time in my life. No fear, no self-consciousness nothing but happiness. But I let my guard down. Finally, I let myself feel and and. How long did it last? How long did that happiness really last? It wasnt worth the cost. It was my fault. I finally gave in but did we get to be happy for a year? A month? A day? No, not even an hour. How long do you think it lasted, Daphne? he challenged.
Daphne shook her head and looked away.
What? It might have been fifteen, twenty minutes at the most. Then I was holding him in my arms while he bled to death. Brian was shaking. Do you know his heart stopped in the ambulance due to blood loss?
They got him back, thank God.
As I sat here soaked in his blood, I promised myself and whoever else might be listening, admitted Brian as he looked up, that I would do whatever was best for him, if only hed live and be okay.
On the third day, I promised Id leave him alone, if that was what was best.
Craig mumbled to himself from the corner.
Anything. Less than an hour later, he stabilized. He was going to live. So, I turned around, walked out of this place, and I didnt come back.
You didnt come back during the day, but you were here every night. All night, corrected Daphne.
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