Scrubbing the shower tiles, Emmett was thinking about the changes in his life over the last few weeks. It had been mostly bad. First, Ted’s downward spiral and then their break-up. He was trying to concentrate on the good, though. His relationship with the girls was stronger than ever. He enjoyed spending time with Gus and the party planning business was really taking off. He hummed one of the infectious tunes from Gus’ favourite cartoon as he scoured the toilet.

 

“Em, we keep telling you that you don’t have to clean the house from top to bottom every other day,” said Lindsay. Gus squirmed to get out of her arms. She put him down and he raced to Emmett.

 

“I told you, cleaning helps me work things out in my head and relieve stress.”

 

“Lucky us, I guess,” she smiled.

 

“Me hep Em,” Gus said excitedly.

 

“No, sorry pal, but these cleaners aren’t kid friendly.”

 

The boy’s face fell. Emmett felt awful.

 

“If it’s okay with Mommy, maybe we could go for a walk.”

 

“It’s alright with me, but do you really have time? Don’t you have a party tonight?”

 

“Yes, but it is just wine and cheese. Vic and I did the prep work this morning. As long as I get there by six for the last minute details, there isn’t much else to do.”

 

 “Okay. I will go get Gus ready.”

 

“And I’ll go change my clothes.”

 

When Emmett passed Lindsay in the hall, she gave him a hug.

 

“I’m so proud of the way you are bouncing back.”

 

“Not much choice but to go forward.”

 

“That doesn’t make it easy, even though, you are being so strong; you make it look that way.”

 

Emmett kissed the top of her head and continued down the hall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After an hour of playing in the park both Emmett and Gus were ready to get out of the cool, crisp air.

 

“How about milk and cookies?” He asked the toddler.

 

“Kookee,” smiled Gus.

 

They walked hand in hand into the diner a few minutes later.

 

“Hey, Sonnyboy,” smiled Brian.

 

“Daddy,” yelled the boy as he ran to his father. Emmett joined them at the table with Ben and Michael.

 

“Did you get stuck babysitting at muncherville?” Brian asked.

 

“No, I had a few extra hours before getting to a party and I couldn’t think of a better way to spend it than with the little man at the park.”

 

“Daddy. Me. Em go pak,” giggled the boy.

 

“What did you do there?”

 

“Swing and weeee,” he answered.

 

“Weeee?” Ben asked.

 

“Weee!” Gus repeated, but this time he lifted his arms over his head.

 

“Oh, the slide,” smiled Michael. I hope my baby is as smart and cute as Gus, he thought.

 

“Kookee. Kookee. Kookee,” said Gus looking at Emmett.

 

“Okay, cookie. I know. Deb, could we get the little man a chocolate chip cookie, please.”

 

“Sure. Milk or hot chocolate to drink?”

 

Gus’ eyes lit up. “Chocate,” he said. “Wip Keme.”

 

“I guess I got my answer,” she laughed, as she went to get the order.

 

“That’s a lot of junk,” Brian said. “You are going to ruin his dinner.”

 

“Probably not. He didn’t eat much for lunch and has been playing hard,” assured Emmett.

 

Deb returned with a cookie on a plate and two mugs of hot chocolate heaping with whip cream. Gus was so excited he could barely sit still. “Oh, I almost forgot,” she said as she handed the boy a shaker full of rainbow sprinkles.

 

“Rinkles,” he squealed, grabbing the shaker. He shook it over his mug. He got more on the table than the whip cream.

 

“Rinkles, Em?” He asked the man sitting next to him.

 

“Yes, please.”

 

The toddler stood on the seat to get better access to his friend’s mug. Pleased with his effort, he sat down to enjoy his treat.

 

“Thank you,” said Emmett.

 

Gus smiled with whip cream all over his face.

 

The four men watched as Gus ate the whip cream with his hands and a spoon.

 

“He sure likes whip cream,” chuckled Ben.

 

“You have no idea. I bet if we put it on liver, he’d eat it,” Emmett laughed.

 

When Gus was almost done with the creamy part, he stopped and looked to Emmett again. “Haut?”

 

The man took the mug and sipped a little of the liquid. “It’s okay. Do you want a straw?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Emmett reached over and took the straw from Brian’s glass of water and placed it in the boy’s mug.

 

Brian felt his heart tighten when he realized how much more Emmett knew about his son than he did.

 

After eating the whip cream and most of his cookie Gus was too full to finish the rest. “Done,” he said, sitting back into the seat.

 

“Let’s get you cleaned up then,” said Brian, carefully lifting the boy. “Emmett, get out of the way.”

 

Father and son made their way to the washroom. Michael looked to his former roommate, “You sure do know how to handle little kids. I am going to need your help in a couple of years.”

 

“No, you won’t. It’s natural. If you trust yourself, kids will too, but if you try to hard then forget it. Kids have the best bullshit meter going.”

 

“Hey,” interrupted Justin, appearing beside their table. “I am running late to meet Brian. Did he give up on me?”

 

“No, he took Gus to wash up in the bathroom. I brought him here for a treat after an afternoon at the park and he kind of made a mess,” replied Emmett, looking at the table.

Justin looked to the table and chuckled, “I bet Brian enjoyed that.” He placed the portfolio on the next table and went behind the counter to get a washrag. Wiping the table clean he added, “You should have seen Brian when I made spaghetti for dinner on a night we had Gus at the loft. I thought he would have a heart attack before it was over.”

 

“Jusin!”

 

“Hey buddy. Looks like you are having a good day,” the teen said, pulling the boy into his arms. Brian joined them and kissed his lover.

 

“You’re late.”

 

“Sorry, Daph was having a dilemma about the new guy she’s dating.”

 

“Sweetie has a new beau, do tell,” exclaimed Emmett.

 

“I don’t know much. I haven’t even met him yet. Tall, dark, gorgeous, cut, smart, funny, that’s all she said.”

 

“Sounds great,” said Michael.

 

“Yeah, or too good to be true.”

 

“You aren’t falling into the trap of being jealous of your best friend’s new relationship, are you?” asked Ben.

 

“No. It’s just that she doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to finding guys that will treat her well.”

 

Brian thought about that last comment as the conversation continued. That was a trait Justin shared with his best friend. Feeling more than a little guilty about being the most significant example of it, interrupted the group.

 

“Did you bring the layout?”

 

“Yes, it’s in the portfolio,” he answered, looking over his shoulder.

 

Brian got up and went to look at the design that he hoped would help him land the last big client he would need to get his new business up and running. He carefully opened the large case and looked at the art before him. He was speechless, better than he ever imagined it would be, he literally couldn’t speak.

 

Justin watched his reaction and stood to join him. “I know I changed the font of the lettering, but I really think this looks better.”

 

The guys at the other table exchanged looks and waited for Brian’s temper.

Justin was getting nervous at the quiet response he was getting from his lover. “This isn’t the final copy. I wanted you to see it before I got the good one printed at the print shop. I can change anything you want. It would just take an hour to make changes.”

 

Brian turned and looked at the blond. “Don’t you dare change a thing! It is perfect. The client is going to love it. Thank you, I am so lucky to have the most talented artist in Pittsburgh working with me,” Brian said and then kissed Justin passionately.

 

 

Justin sat in the living room of the apartment he shared with Daphne. He stared at the almost blank computer screen. I hope Brian’s meeting is going okay. He really needs to do something. The amount of trouble his idle hands could get into is hard to predict, he laughed to himself.

 

The door opened with Daphne leading a good-looking guy into the apartment.

 

“Hey.”

 

“Hey, any news?”

 

“No. I think this is the longest business dinner in history.”

 

“It’s all going to work. He’s too smart not to make this work,” offered the girl.

 

“Thanks, Daph. Are you going to introduce me to…”

 

“Oh, sorry. Dylan, this is my best friend, Justin. Justin, this is Dylan. We have biochem together.”

 

“Nice to meet you,” offered Justin, holding out his hand.

 

“Thank you, it’s good to meet you, too. I feel like I know you, my mother cut your picture out of the paper and put it on the fridge. My sister is a lesbian and my mother is very involved in PFLAG in my hometown. I was relieved when Daph told me how well you are.”

 

“Thanks,” answered Justin, a little uncomfortable talking about the bashing. “What are you guys up to?”

 

“We were going for coffee, but she wanted a sweater,” explained Dylan. “Would you like to come with us?”

 

“No. I’m waiting to hear from someone. Thanks, anyway.”

 

“Ready,” Daphne said, returning to the living room. “See ya.”

 

“Later,” replied Justin.

 

As Daphne opened the door, Brian came down the hall.

 

“Hello beautiful,” he said, giving her a hug. Dylan’s eyes narrowed.

 

“Good news?” Daphne asked.

 

“The best,” answered the older man, kissing her cheek. She blushed, “Justin’s inside.”

 

“Good. Who is this?” Brian asked, looking Dylan over.

 

“Dylan, this is Brian Kinney. Brian, this is Dylan. We have some classes together. We’re going for coffee.”

 

“Hello.”

 

“Nice to meet you.”

 

“Well, you kids have fun. I have some celebrating to do.”

 

Brian pulled Daphne back for a second, “He’s cute.”

 

“Leave him alone. I know all about your gay, straight, or undecided philosophy,” she smiled.

 

“I wouldn’t do that to you, Princess. Besides, he’s too young for me.”

 

“Not really, he’s older than Justin,” she giggled.

 

“Yes, but Justin is the exception to every rule,” he said, rolling his eyes. He went through the door and was attacked by a smiling blond.

 

“You don’t even know what happened,” said the older man between kisses.

 

“Yes, I do. I heard what you said to Daph,” he replied, before recapturing his lover’s lips with his own.

 

“I got the account. I can’t believe it. That’s enough to start. You, me, and Cynthia. Fuck. There is so much to do. I have to find some office space. Does your mother sell commercial real estate too? Would that be too weird? She probably wants to string me up by my balls for luring you back into my depraved lifestyle. I have never really looked at office space until this week. I don’t know what’s better getting something a little smaller in the business district or getting a cooler bigger space somewhere else. I realized on the way over here that there will be a lot of shopping involved in this. Could it be any more perfect? I have to start making a list of smaller local companies that could be potential clients. I think after the five large ones, several smaller ones would be good. They tend to be less demanding and will be less work for you. After things get settled we can work on the mid-level clients that will be the life blood of the firm. The work you do for this company will have to be worked around your school schedule when you go back. I have to think of a name. I am more than open to suggestions. Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

 

“With that weird little smile, what are you thinking?”

 

“That I have never seen you so excited about something. It’s adorable. Your eyes are dancing. You thrive on a challenge. I can see it. I’m grateful that you want to include me in this.”

 

“We are very much alike, Justin. I know we have never discussed this, but it’s time I told you how much I respect and admire how strong you are. The trials and tribulations that you have overcome in the years that I have known you are remarkable. I should be grateful to you for agreeing to work with me. On top of the fact that you are an amazing artist, your intelligence and good instincts are just as valuable to me in this new agency.”

 

Justin had tears in his eyes and was scared to say anything, he was sure his voice would crack. On top of that, he had no idea what to say; but also knew that too long of a silence wasn’t appropriate either. He walked over to his lover and gave him a sweet sensual kiss and one of his sunshine smiles. They stared at each other for a few minutes and then the younger man thought it was time to deal with the realities.

 

“Okay, one thing at a time. My mother could help you find a place and no, she doesn’t hate you. She will like you even more if you get her a half decent commission for a sale. My Dad is giving her a hard time again.”

 

“Would it help if I beat the shit out of the selfish prick? That would make my day even more perfectly satisfying,” Brian laughed.

 

“No, but I’ll keep you posted. I think the office should be cool. Vanguard was so dull. I could never figure out how you could be creative in such a boring and uninspiring environment. The art department wasn’t quite as dull because the art was all over the place, but the last thing the new firm will need is grey or beige walls.”

 

“Justin, it’s an advertising agency. The clients are all corporate stiffs. It is important that they feel comfortable.”

 

“I am not suggesting that you have them sit on a crate. However, they are coming to you because their products are not selling. Wouldn’t it be better if they saw a visually stimulating, invigorating place instead of the boring monotonous beige walls and beige furniture? The building should match the style of your ideas; sharp, bright, bold, and in your face. The first time I went to your office, I couldn’t understand how such an exciting and spontaneous person had such a predictable and tired working space.”

 

“What do you want me to do? Let Emmett decorate?”

 

“No, but that would be better than the status quo. Emmett would include too many animal prints. Maybe Cynthia and Lindsay could find the right balance or at least the right interior decorator. Hell, you could even do it. The loft was sleek, cool, and sophisticated. That would be another way to go. I will not work in a stifling place. I get enough of that at school.”

 

“You might be on to something. See, I told you that you are full of great ideas. What else?”

 

“As far as the client lists go, that is your job. I have no idea how you decide to whom to pitch. My schedule shouldn’t be a problem and who knows when I will go back to school. I will not apologize to Stockwell. No matter what!”

 

“Now that he lost the election, hopefully, they will lift the suspension. I think you should go talk to the dean again.”

 

“Maybe.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Debbie was cooking. It was the only way she could keep busy while they waited to hear from Melanie. Ben and Michael were in the living room trying not to drive each other crazy. It had been days since Hunter had been forced to go home with his mother. The only thing they knew for sure was that he had run away the first night and had spent twenty-four hours in a group home. He was once again released to his mother’s custody and that is all they knew.

 

Mel had volunteered to be the boy’s lawyer more as a way to see him than for the fact that he needed any real legal advice. He was not being charged with anything.

 

Debbie placed the lasagna in the oven and started to clean up the kitchen. There was a knock at the door and Michael ran to open it. He showed Mel into the living room and went to the kitchen and brought back a glass of milk for the mother of his unborn child. Ben smiled. One of the things that he loved about the man was how he took care of people. Deb placed a pillow on the chair where Mel was about to sit. Michael comes by it honestly, Ben thought to himself.

 

“I talked with Hunter,” Mel began.

 

“How is he?” Ben asked.

 

“He was very quiet at first and I don’t know him that well, but physically he looked okay. He was clean and well dressed. He asked me to thank you guys for trying and he was very concerned that you were in jail, Michael.”

 

“He really is a good kid,” smiled Deb.

 

“I told him that the two of you were going to try and fight to get guardianship of him but he would have to help. He was reluctant. He said that you should go on with your lives and not worry about him. He would take care of himself. I explained to him that that wasn’t going to happen so he might as well help. He told me there was a social worker involved in the case but he couldn’t remember his name. We are lucky that it was a man because that narrows it down and he gave me a description. I will call a friend in that office and figure out who it is tomorrow. Then we can proceed from there.”

 

“Thanks Mel,” said Michael, as he squeezed her hand.

 

“I just hope we can help him because I want you guys to realize that the odds are stacked against us big time. Two gay men trying to get guardianship of a teenage boy is a very hard sell. Especially in the polarized environment that is this city after the election.”

 

“What if I tried?” Deb asked. “They couldn’t attack me on that issue. Hunter could have Michael and Justin’s old room. I have taken in a teenager before and it worked out well. I bet if we explained the situation and the details to Jennifer she would help by testifying for me. Justin, too.”

 

“That might be a better idea. As much as I hate to play their games, the stakes are too high to get on a moral gay equal rights high horse. Choosing the most winnable case despite the politics might be a preferable choice.”

 

Ben and Michael looked at each other; they knew what the other was thinking without saying a word.

 

“We would rather have him with us, but his safety is more important. Do whatever you have to. We have to do this quickly before she hurts him again or before he runs away and we never see him again.,” Ben said for both of them.

 

“Okay. I will track down the social worker tomorrow and see if he can offer any information that might be of help.”

 

“Thanks Mel,” said Ben as he helped her on with her coat.

 

“Take care of the pumpkin and let us know what we can do to help Hunter,” offered Michael as he kissed her cheek goodbye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Strumming a pencil on the edge of the desk, Ted stared at the piece of paper in front of him. When we talked about this in group, I didn’t think it would be this difficult, he thought to himself. A list of the people I have hurt by being an addict. Okay, I can do this.

 

Gus, how could I steal from a baby? I am ashamed to say that wasn’t even my bottom. I still made excuses and kept trying to convince everyone that nothing was wrong.

 

I doubt that Mel will ever trust me again and I can’t blame her. She worked very hard to save that money and was relying on me to protect and nurture it for her son. But what did I do? I wasted it on drugs and sex.

 

Lindsay was trying to be kind, but I know she didn’t approve of the website. I can just imagine what she thinks of me now.

 

I still can’t believe that Brian didn’t beat the shit out of me for stealing from his son.

 

I know my drug use hurt Michael too. He is a very sensitive and protective person. He tried to warn me early on, but I was too fucked up to realize it.

 

Ben and Vic. I have made a fool of myself in front of them so many times. How will I ever face them? Both of them have every reason to feel sorry for themselves, but they are moving on with life. I am so ashamed. Even with such wonderful role models, I still let hard luck get to me.

 

Tears filled Ted’s eyes as he carefully printed EMMETT on the piece of paper. Not only have I ruined our relationship, but our friendship as well. His mind filled with images of Emmett’s sad heartbroken face. Dissolving into sobs, he crumpled the paper and threw it against the wall.

 

Blake knocked and opened the door to find Ted crying. He picked up the piece of paper and smoothed it out. He placed it in front of Ted.

 

“You forgot someone very important.”

 

“Who?”

 

“The most important person you hurt,” he answered. Then he wrote a name on the paper.

 

Ted looked at it and then laughed.

 

“This is the person that was hurt the most and until you make peace with him, nothing else will help you recover,” explained Blake and after a reassuring squeeze to Ted’s shoulder, he left.

 

Ted thought about what Blake had said as he stared at his own name on the piece of paper.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Justin pulled his sweat pants down and crawled into the large bed beside Brian.

 

“Mom said she would gather some listings tomorrow morning and show you the places in the afternoon.”

 

“Great. You have to come with me. If your mother gets me alone in an empty building, she might kill me while she has the chance.”

 

“My mother does NOT hate you. Besides, I think you could take her.”

 

“I don’t know. She’s pretty tough.”

“I think it is hilarious that you are afraid of my mother,” chuckled Justin as he snuggled against Brian.

 

“You are going to go with us, right?”

 

“Sure. It should be good for a laugh. You both make each other incredibly uncomfortable.”

 

“Well, at least one of us will enjoy the afternoon.”

 

“Speaking of uncomfortable, what did you think of Dylan?”

 

“I only saw him for a minute in the hall. I was too preoccupied to really notice him.”

 

“Yeah, right.”

 

“Okay, I did notice he’s hot, but that’s it. You don’t like him?”

 

“I got a weird vibe from him. I only saw him for about five minutes myself.”

“You decided you didn’t like him before you met him, admit it.”

 

“I know, but if I had been wrong, I would be willing to admit it. His sister is a lesbian and his mother is involved in PFLAG in his hometown. He knew about the bashing.”

 

“You talked about all of that in five minutes?”

 

“I know it’s weird. Daph sure has a hard time with guys. I am just glad that I will be around to see how he really is.”

 

“I still don’t understand how the two of you live in that closet together,” sighed Brian, covering them with the duvet.

 

“It’s not THAT small.”

 

“Justin, I bet Ted’s room in rehab is bigger than that whole apartment.”

 

“Ted,” Justin repeated. A long silence followed as they both thought about the man.

 

“It’s good that he’s getting help. One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned, is that a man has to know when to ask for help.”

 

“That was tough on all of us while you learned that,” admitted Brian, pulling Justin to his chest.

 

“Emmett seems to be doing better. I feel for him. It’s not easy to wear your emotions on your sleeve for the whole world to see.”

 

“I know. He seems to spend a lot of time with Gus.”

 

“I envy that so much. I wish I had more time to spend with him. He is so much fun to take to the park and stuff now. It’s so cool to watch him learn something. You can actually see it in his eyes. It must be good for Linds and Mel to have some extra help, too. From what Michael said the other day, she has had some complications with her pregnancy.”

 

“Yeah, Michael is going to have a heart attack before the baby is born at this rate.” Brian replied, but his thoughts were focused on the fact that he hadn’t spent much time with his son lately. “Why don’t we see if we can take Gus for a day this weekend? Maybe they would let us have him for the whole weekend. I realized at the diner that he is becoming his own little person and I don’t want to miss it. We could take him to the zoo or something.”

 

“That would be great. He would love to spend time with you. Maybe it should be a Daddy and Gus day.”

 

“No. We are together now,” Brian paused and smiled. In unison they continued “in a non-defined, unconventional kind of way,” they both laughed.

 

“Gus should spend time with both of us.”

 

“I can’t think of anything I would rather do.”

 

“If he is going to stay here for the night, that means no sex. We should make up for lost time now,” said Brian, sliding down under the duvet.

 

“We haven’t missed anything yet?” Justin laughed.

 

Brian poking his head out from under the blanket, “Are you complaining?” He asked before he disappeared again.

 

“Absolutely not,” sighed Justin. What a perfect night he thought. We had a normal conversation and now this. He bit his lower lip and moaned. His thoughts fluttered away as the sensations that Brian was creating for him clouded his mind.

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