King’s Wolf

Chapter Six

Michael’s sleep was restless — he was troubled by nightmares frequently.  Colin learned this only after the two of them began to share a bed, and nothing he tried of the many remedies he knew as a druid seemed to help. All he could do was watch helplessly until his love woke, or finally fell into a more restful sleep, though the latter rarely happened. He tried, subtly, to discover the cause of Michael’s troubled slumber, but his partner looked at him perplexed when questioned, as though he had no memory of the dreams that tormented his nights.

That was not quite the truth — Michael remembered many of his worst dreams. He just saw no purpose to sharing them with Colin and possibly ridding himself of them. He thought he should keep a strong recollection of the events that most troubled him. His collection was growing. Where once he dreamed mainly of Adam and Suzanne’s deaths, he now had the battle at Candone and Nic’s kidnapping away from Rafe’s wedding to add to his repertoire of night terrors.

The one that filled his mind this night was one that came rarely, but unlike the others, he had trouble remembering the details when he woke. That very fact, his fear upon wakening without any clear memory of why beyond the sense of being hurt and frightened and very young, told him that he’d had the nightmare, his oldest, again.

Why now, when he should be happy? Nic was back, and even his brother Ben, long believed dead, was returned to the family.

Ben. 

Michael’s mind reached for Colin’s consciousness. They were so attuned to each other than even still half asleep, he was able to reach him.

‘Colin, I need your help.’

‘Thank the goddess. I cannot bear to see you in pain and not help. How can I ease your mind?’

‘Help me uncover what happens in this nightmare that torments me — if I do not wake fully, perhaps you can help me find what has eluded me for so long?’

‘I will,’ Colin promised, determined to help Michael now that he’d been given the opportunity. Despite all that had happened that day, he was filled with energy.

‘Do whatever you can to uncover this dream…this nightmare…from my subconscious…please.’

Michael’s tone was as tense as Colin had ever ‘heard’ it. Considering all that his lover had shared with him of his memories, he trembled to think of what horror might be hidden. Still, he firmly believed that much of any terror lay in what was unknown about it. Remove the mystery and one removed the fear.

Murmuring a spell to ease Michael back into a deeper sleep, Colin waited a moment, and then began to ease his way into Michael’s thoughts as Michael had taught him to do. They had done this a few times before, but only when both of them were awake. Probing Michael’s mind now, when he was back in the throes of whatever dream or nightmare held him, was far different than the sharp dreamscape of Michael’s usual very orderly, clear mind, through which he took Colin on extremely clear trips when awake. Now it was like walking through a mist filled forest…no…now, Colin found himself suddenly in a many roomed palace. Possibly the former Emory palace at Candone; it had that look to it, but dark and misty as places often looked in dreams and visions.

Colin walked along the long hallway, making his way as best he could. He was not sure where he was headed but assumed that Michael’s subconscious would take him somewhere. With that thought, he found himself in a bedroom. It was a child’s bedroom, if the size of the bed in it was any indication, but more ornate than any self-respecting Third Kingdom Royal would consider appropriate for a child. The bed’s head and footboards were gold — not gold plated, Colin would swear, but truly made of gold — and decorated with runes and images from bard-songs.
There was a small dark-haired child in the bed, a boy who looked much like Nic and Rafe when they were small, no more than a few years old. The child seemed to be in a deep sleep, but something caused him to stir in his sleep. He moved slightly, and then, abruptly, his eyes opened wide, revealing beautiful eyes of brilliant green. Suddenly, Colin’s perspective shifted, and he felt himself as one with the child Michael, suddenly aware of some danger. His heart was pounding as he sat bolt upright and looked toward the room’s single window, which was open to the night air.
A large mountain cat stood on the window sill, its green eyes, which were somewhat similar in color to the child Michael’s own, though different in shape, gleamed malevolently. In less time than it took to blink, before he could even draw enough breath to scream, the cat sprang toward the bed.

Colin/Michael felt paralyzed with fear. Just as he felt sure he was about to be mauled to pieces, another person, a boy, entered the room in a rush, and Colin/Michael felt both relief and renewed fear. The rescuer had no sword and was but a boy himself! This then was Ben Emory as a youth, barely a teen, as Colin recalled the tale, come to rescue his baby brother. But the story took an unexpected twist. Just as the large cat turned to look at the intruder, its big paws pressing down heavily on its small prey’s body, preventing the child from being able to cry for help, the boy’s large green eyes showing his abject terror, his would-be rescuer morphed into a cat and sprang toward the bed, knocking the other cat from his brother with his larger Metamorph body.

The battle between the Metamorph Cat and the mountain cat was fierce, and bloody.  When it was over, Ben morphed back and kneeled over the dead body of the mountain cat and vomited, before getting to his feet and going over to the child on the bed.  Michael, with Colin sharing his consciousness in this vision-like dream, stared at him, eyes still wide and afraid.

‘It’s okay, little one, it’s okay,’ Ben whispered, his voice already showing signs of the huskiness that would be its trademark in later life. He reached toward Michael but hesitated. Colin’s heart ached for both young boys. It was so clear that Ben was trying to fight off shock; Colin suspected it was the first time he’d ever killed. From the awkward way he’d changed back and moved afterward, it may have been one of the first times, if not the first, he’d ever morphed. Yet his first concern was for the younger child, and he was clearly concerned that he would add to his brother’s fear if he went closer.

The child Michael did not reject his brother; he clung to him desperately, crying out his fear and relief as the young teen tried awkwardly to comfort him. Eventually they were discovered by a guard, who called out an alarm, which brought the King and Adam, along with several of the King’s druids and advisors. The dead cat was examined by the Head Guard, and there was much exclaiming over Ben’s feat.  Colin noticed a young apprentice druid place a knife and sword in the room — he was clever and placed them in darkened corners so that they would be discovered later and he remembered to drag them through the cat’s blood. Thus, when people were beginning to question how the boy had managed to defeat a hunting mountain cat, the young druid was able to casually come upon the seemingly overlooked weapons. Colin suspected that plans for this ruse had been shared telepathically.

Adam’s eyes narrowed as Ben gave a quiet, simple explanation of hearing Michael cry out and coming in, armed, and making the kill. There were bruises on Michael’s small body to attest to the close call — and Ben’s body was also cut and bruised, showing that he did not have an easy time defeating the cat. He was praised by the guards, and even the King offered a word of praise, but both Jerad and Adam looked troubled, Colin thought, and not just by the fact that the precious youngest prince almost died. The King and his Heir kept exchanging glances, and their praise of Ben was temperate at best.

Michael, however, could not be separated from his hero, and insisted that Ben stay with him. Adam tried to tease him away, and offered to take him to his bedchamber for the remainder of the night — a rare treat — but to everyone’s surprise, Michael turned him down. He asked to go with Ben instead. Ben ducked his head down, but his pleased flush was obvious in this dreamworld.  The two younger ‘brothers’ went to sleep together, the small one tucked securely under the arm of his rescuer.  Colin could not help noticing how much more sparely decorated Ben Emory’s bedchamber was than Michael’s, or even than what he remembered of Adam Emory’s.  Ben’s could have been a druid’s room, it was so simply furnished.

Michael’s subconscious was not done with him yet. Colin was not sure how much time had passed but he thought it was at least some weeks before the events in the next vision, which revealed a young Michael running to the same bedchamber where he’d slept so peacefully with Ben, and looking desperately for his ‘brother’.  He called and called for him but could not find him. He pushed and kicked at the guards who tried to stop him from searching through the rooms and to return him to his own room.

Adam was brought.

Arms crossed over his small chest, young Michael demanded to see Ben. Adam bent down and picked him up. The usual cheery expression was on his handsome face, but there was a coldness in his eyes that had never been there before. Michael’s small face was pressed against his shoulder and Colin wondered how he knew but children see more than the adults around them realize. This was a memory that Michael’s subconscious must have buried deep, as it was not consistent with what he liked to remember of his brother Adam.

‘Ben needs to do some traveling, Michael. It is his duty as a Prince, and particularly one who will be an Assassin one day. He must go to the Third Kingdom and train in special techniques. We will miss him but at least we still have each other for now.’

‘I need him!’

‘Why, little one? Isn’t your Adam enough? Why do you need Ben so much?’

‘To fight the cats! And,’ Michael looked down for a moment, before looking up to meet his oldest brother’s gaze bravely as he said, ‘he keeps me warm and safe.’

Adam laughed and Colin wanted to think it was his genuine laugh. But it had a forced sound to it, at least in this dream it did. ‘I will keep the cats away, little one, and keep you safe and warm. Ben will be back later, after he learns his lessons and duty as each of us must. We will say prayers to the goddess for his safe return, will that please you?’

Michael continued to keep his gaze fixed on Adam’s face and whatever he saw in those matching green eyes did not satisfy him.  In the way of children, he was blunt in his appraisal as he said, ‘You are not telling me the truth. Why, Adam? You always tell me the truth.’

Adam frowned and he actually shook Michael a little, something he never did, but this was the first time he’d ever lost his temper with his younger brother.

“You will listen to what I say and you will believe me and it will be the end of this, Michael Emory. Ben is going away and you will forget about what happened, nay, you will remember only that you were attacked by a Mountain Cat Metamorph. Have nothing to do with them. You will remember that much, Michael.’

With sinking heart, Colin realized that Adam was sending feelings of fear to his small brother, feelings of fear that he connected to Cat Metamorphs, and the normally kind King’s Heir replayed the experience of being attacked in the small child’s mind, without the sensations of being bravely rescued and loved that had accompanied the frightening attack. Adam had refilled Michael with the fear that Colin knew with a certainty Ben had carefully and patiently drained from his younger brother’s mind — to what end had Adam acted so harshly?

Colin wrapped his arms around Michael tightly as he carefully worked to lift away the illusion that had been planted so long ago and replaced it with the feelings of safety and caring that Ben had nurtured in his small ‘brother.’

Long after Michael was sleeping peacefully, and dreamlessly, Colin stayed awake and pondered the significance of the dream, nay, nightmare vision. Why had Adam, whom he knew to have loved Michael like a son, deliberately tampered with his memory like that, an action that could only cause him pain? Why had he denied Ben the hero’s role he deserved and why had Ben been sent away so soon after he’d done such a good, brave deed?

The answers might be lost forever, with Adam long gone, but Ben’s return at least meant that his version could now be heard, and for the first time, Colin felt that he could hear it with an open heart and mind.

*******************
 

Once they were in their own room, Lycan picked Dominic up in his arms and kissed him deeply.

“I need a bath first,” Nic whispered into Lycan’s mouth. “I have dirt and blood and countless horrible things on me.”

“I do not think I can wait.”

“Then come into the bath with me.”

Lycan made a face but Nic just laughed softly and loosened the tie on his mate’s pants. He tried to start the water flowing into the tub with the telekinesis that it was designed to respond to, but he was too tired. He sighed. He felt as though it had been an age since he had more than enough mana for his needs. The mana he’d gained with the Druid Deryk’s drink was used up in healing Ben. He wondered how soon he could drink more.

Nic rested his head on Lycan’s chest, enjoying the feel of his mate’s hair, and the rumble of his laughter — even when it was directed at him!

“You will get your bath, weary Cub. I will use a trick of my people — and turn the faucets on with my hands. They can be very useful.” 

Nic laughed as Lycan intended, though his thoughts were still distracted.  He needed to have a talk with Lycan about Lydia, but for now he pushed that aside and allowed himself to enjoy being cared for by his mate.

Lycan set Nic down on the edge of the deep tub, which was shaped like a small pond, and twisted the handles, sending water flowing into it. It was a pleasure to sit in the steaming water, actually, but he never admitted as much to Nic, preferring to let him beg and tease for Lycan to join him in the water. It had been so long since he had heard his mate’s teasing! The steaming hot water felt very good to aching muscles, but the sound of Nic’s laughter was even more pleasing to him.

Once the water was deep enough, he sat in the tub and then pulled Nic in to sit between his legs. Nic leaned back against his mate’s chest and pulled Lycan’s arms around so that they wrapped around his chest. They rested like that for several minutes, enjoying the feel of the water and each other’s body.  Lycan pushed aside his shock at how thin Nic was and concentrated on being grateful that he had him back in his arms again. Now that Nic was with him again, he would be able to get the weight back on him. He ran his hands down his Cub’s sides, feeling each rib, the jut of his hipbones, and was so grateful to the goddess…and his sister…that Nic did not starve before he was able to reach him.

I needed you so much, Wolf.

I tried to get to you.

We are together now.

There was another pause and then, The She-wolf…Lydia? I have to tell you about her, Wolf.

I think I already know, Cub, and it is of no importance. I am more glad than you will ever know that you had her with you.

There may be…consequences.

Another pause followed. Shorter than the first one. Then Lycan tightened his hold on Dominic. This needed to be spoken out loud as it was beyond his ability for the mind speech to convey.

“Dominic, Cub….I promised your Sire that I would not stand in the way of your continuing your line with children. I admit, I did not anticipate it being accomplished in quite this manner, but I should have learned that you always do the unexpected. It is good that it is with a She-Wolf — the goddess works in strange ways. Stranger than you know.”  There was another pause as Lycan searched for the words to tell Nic his own secret.
Meanwhile, Nic was laughing in relief. He rolled out of Lycan’s arms long enough to duck under the water and rinse his curls. His hair had grown very long during his captivity and time on the run. He turned and looked at his mate.

“Are you sure you are not angry with me?”

Lycan stretched out and glided through the water. Nic could not help admiring the way his mate’s body looked as it stretched — he was so unconscious of his own beauty, which was part of his attractiveness. Nic felt his member harden — it had been so long since they had been together. He swam over to Lycan, balancing his body over the hard muscular form of his love.

“I am not angry,” Lycan assured him, balancing Nic on top of his body, holding him so that the warm water covered his back and his front floated lightly against his own much larger frame. He hated to delay their lovemaking but it was necessary, he felt, that they first cleared the air of all secrets.

“There is also something I need to tell you. Something important,” Lycan told Nic somberly.

“Can it wait until after you have filled me with your hardness?” Nic asked softly as he straddled Lycan, his hips teasing over Lycan’s swollen organ. He shifted so that their members rubbed together deliciously, the movement in the water almost more than he could take after his long months of abstinence, but for the one time with Lydia. To his frustration, Lycan stilled his movements.

“It cannot wait. I do not want us to join again until I tell you all that you need to know.” Lycan sat up against the wall of the pool again and pulled Nic up so that he was facing him, his knees on either side of his waist. Their members still bobbed together in the water and Lycan had to grab Nic’s hand to stop him from palming them together.

“There will be enough time for that after I have told all. The She-Wolf, Lydia, she is not a stranger to me.”

“I was worried about that!” Nic exclaimed. “Could it be that out of all the packs in the Three Kingdoms, Lydia is a former lover of yours?”

Lycan stared at him blankly, then laughed. Nic made a face and he quickly stopped. “No, that is not it. At least, it is not completely correct, though in part, you are right. Out of all the packs in the Three Kingdoms, she did in fact once belong to my Pack. But she was not my lover — she is my sister. She was born a full year after I was.”

Dominic was torn between relief and concern. He was glad that Lydia had not lain with Lycan, which was not very reasonable of him given that he had lain with her. But the fact that he was her brother? That left him with more questions than it answered, though it did explain why she always reminded him so much of Lycan. But why was Lycan’s sister so bitter about his Pack? The discussions they’d had about her old Pack had convinced him that she had come from a Pack very different from Lycan’s!  He wrapped his arms around his mate’s neck and rubbed their cheeks together.

“What happened?  Why did she leave? Did you really force her to go away? She said as much.”

“It is a long story. But no, I never wanted her to leave. I am relieved that she is well. And strong. Though I believe she has lived a lonely life.” 

Without embellishment, Lycan told Nic the story he’d already shared with Michael.

“She could not forgive me for being the stronger leader, the stronger wolf, than her bondmate. He was not honorable, as a man or as a wolf. She chose to live without the Pack, when we would have welcomed her then or at any time since. Bran is very happy to see her; he has worried about her these ten years, as he loved her like a daughter.”

Nic was quiet for another long pause. Lycan waited. His mate’s hands were massaging his shoulders absently as he thought, so Lycan was not concerned. There was no loss of closeness.

Eventually, Nic leaned forward, his head touching Lycan’s.

“This has happened as the goddess has willed it. Your sister must stay with us. And my children will be your children. We will raise them together. I have dreamed of wolf cubs, but truly only thought they were wishful dreams. Now I dare to hope they are dreams of the children to come — a girl and two boys, as handsome as you and Lydia in their wolf forms, as strong and graceful as my father in their human forms. I thought at first she was having twins, but I now believe that there is a third — the boys are twins and there is a third, a special child, as a gift from the goddess.”

“I believe they are all a gift from the goddess, as is your safe return, and my sister being the one to help you. I hope she will continue to bless us and lead Lydia to agree to stay.”

“I will talk to her. She will see that it is good for all of us. She is a wonderful person — almost as wonderful as you are.”

Nic lowered his lips to Lycan’s, and kissed him, reveling in the taste of his mate’s mouth after so long. Their joining was passionate and fierce, like the first time they were together. Afterward, Lycan gently washed his mate and then carried him from the water and dried him.

Lycan laid Dominic down in their bed and climbed in beside him. He was not as sure as Nic that all would work out well with Lydia, but he knew that he would do all in his power to make it work for his mate’s sake — and also prayed that the goddess would continue to lend a hand. It certainly seemed that she had taken a direct interest in Nic’s affairs. They had not yet spoken of what had happened at the Standing Stones — something powerful had occurred there and he had almost feared that his laughing Cub was lost to him forever, that the goddess-kissed stranger who glowed with white energy and power and who spoke directly to the goddess had forever taken his place.

He would never deny the goddess anything she asked of him, but Lycan gave sincere thanks that she had not asked that he give up his Cub to her — it would have been a great sacrifice that would have ripped the very heart from him.

*******************

 
In the healing room, too early to be considered the next morning, as the sun had not yet broken the horizon, Michael was sitting by the bedside of the man he once believed was his brother. Colin brought him a glass of wine.

“Can I not convince you to sleep some more, Michael?”

“I am resting. Sleep will not come back even if I were to lie down and close my eyes. Dominic conveyed to me just a little of what he learned during his captivity. It is difficult to comprehend.  I cannot fathom what my grandfather could have been thinking, to play such cruel games with his sons and grandsons, as though they were puppets instead of people. There is still more Nic has to tell me, I dread learning it but know that I must.”

Colin was not sure if Michael remembered any of his nightmare — he had been gone when Colin woke after finally falling into an uneasy sleep. It had not been difficult to guess where he would find him.  Before going to Michael, Colin had searched for Deryk, who had been hard at work, brewing.  He joined him, and in working with his brother druid, was able to achieve a measure of peace with him. He also learned a good deal of information that never would have been given had he attempted to force it from him through suspicious questioning. He shared some of it now as Michael stared broodingly at his sleeping “brother.” Colin was able to tell Michael some of what Nic had learned during his captivity, concluding with this sobering information. 

“From what I have been able to learn from Deryk, the segregation of those children who were believed to carry the so-called ‘taint’ went on long before your grandfather. If there is any comfort to be taken, it is from the fact that at least Aaron did not kill his family members who were Metamorphs.”

Michael shook his head sadly. “I never knew. I am considered to be a strong Telepath and yet I never guessed what was going on in my own family.  Ben is twelve years older than me. He never seemed as easy to talk to as Adam, who was half again older and yet it was he who often seemed more like my peer. If I had known Ben carried such a heavy burden….”

Colin wrapped his arms around Michael. “You were a young boy when you were sent away. It was not really your duty to fix the problems in your family. Was Adam closer to Ben than you were?” Colin waited to see what Michael remembered of Ben’s personal history with him.

Michael frowned. “No. That troubles me also. He used to tease Ben, call him ‘the loner’ but he never was unkind, at least, I never thought he was. I have to wonder now if he knew Ben was not our brother. He would have been six when Ben was born. He should have known he was not our father’s son, shouldn’t he, even if they were supposedly from different mothers? My memory is oddly vague of my early years. My mother died in childbirth so I do not know how much interaction Adam and Ben would have had with one of their father’s other wives, to even know if she was expecting. Did a child just suddenly appear at the Royal Court back in those days? And all those times Ben went away, supposedly to train. Was it like the time I went to the Second Kingdom, with all the planning and discussion, or was he sent away for some other purpose and suddenly? I feel as though I should remember more.”

So Michael did remember something of the times Ben was sent away, Colin thought. But he obviously did not remember his own earliest reaction to Ben’s leaving. He gently touched Michael’s arm.

“You can find out tomorrow. He needs his rest and so do you.”

“I will not bother him with questions. I just want to stay here in case he wakes and feels…concerned… waking in a strange place. He is still very weak.” Michael flushed slightly as he paused, searching for an excuse, realizing that it was undoubtedly foolish to worry about a man who had spent more years as a cold-blooded assassin than Michael had, but still he felt loathe to leave Ben alone.

Ben was listening to the conversation between his brother…still hard not to think of Michael as his brother…and Michael’s Druid partner, the Third Kingdom Royal.  Ben was good at feigning sleep so he used that talent now to get a closer look at the man he had looked at from afar many times.  He was curious about the man who had tamed his wild younger brother. He had spied on him many times over the past year, both in Deryk’s scrying glass and in his own trips to the First Kingdom. He had not been on the mission that had destroyed the monastery at which rumor had told them the Allym heir had been hidden. Another Assassin had undertaken to lead that mission. It was that failure that had caused Jamyn to send Ben to lead the attack on Adam’s Court.

Because one small baby and a Druid had survived that bloody attack, Ben had been forced to plan the mission that killed another baby, yet unborn. It mattered not that it was not his knife that ended Queen Suzanne’s life; his was the tactical skill that planned that attack and made it as successful as it was. He bore the guilt all these years. Seeing those Allym gray eyes so close now, as he watched through his lashes, he recalled watching from the shore as this weather mage raised a storm like none that he had ever seen and sank the ships his father had sent chasing after Michael and his children, as well as the tiny Queen and her Protector. He had believed in the goddess on that day — for the first time in years — and known he was on the wrong side. 

The faith he felt that day wavered over the intervening years as he served his father’s foul quest, but it was reborn when he began to know his nephew Dominic. That faith flared to full life at the Stones of Tuneric when he saw Dominic, burning with the goddess’ favor, perform a miracle by raising the stones that Jamyn and his druids had toppled with dark arts.  Like the defeat of the Hell Hound of Candone, this second Emory miracle would spread through the lands, uniting the people and restoring all the peoples’ faith and hope.

Before closing the door behind him, Colin paused. “You can stop pretending to be asleep, Ben Emory. But know this — if you try to harm my bondmate, you will wish you had died as I know methods of inflicting pain that your Druid has never imagined, much less learned how to cure.”

“I would expect nothing less, Colin Allym,” Ben answered, in a voice that was little more than a hoarse whisper. “But my little brother is safe with me — my intent is pure, even if my body were capable of harm, which it is not.”

“Just of deception,” Colin noted wryly, before leaving, closing the curtain behind him, to give the two men some measure of privacy.

When the silence that followed grew prolonged, Michael commented, “Colin loves getting the last word. It is difficult in our family — having met my son, Nic, I am sure you can imagine why.” His love for the tall Druid was apparent in his voice for all that he projected a cool nonchalance.

Ben’s dark eyes had been watching Michael closely, but he was difficult to read — no change there, Michael thought, remembering the quiet young man he had been with some difficulty. The reference to Nic did bring a half smile to his dark face.

“He is…remarkable. You would have been quite proud of how he handled his captivity. He withstood difficulties with…grace and humor.”

Michael’s expression darkened. “You kidnapped my son, Ben. You starved him and tortured him — I have accepted you back because he asked me to do so and I can deny him nothing at this time. Plus, he tells me that not only would he not have escaped without your aid, but that when I hear all, I will understand why you have acted the way you have, but I must tell you, it will take a lot to make me understand and forgive your action in taking him and harming him. And that is without considering your actions toward Rafael and Mellisande… and then there is…..” Michael stopped. He could not even speak Suzanne and Adam’s names, not in connection with forgiving the man who caused their murders. Not yet. His green eyes glittered coldly.

Ben met his hard look evenly. “Then we are in agreement with our disagreement with your son as I also do not think anything justifies what I have done. I acted to help Nic because I tired of being on the wrong side of a very long battle for vengeance, but I know that my actions in the past, both long ago and recently, have put me beyond any forgiveness. All I can say is that I saw no other choice when I was young and I was taught to believe that I was a soldier in enemy territory. I followed orders seeing no other path. Nic opened my eyes to seeing that I had the right to make a choice to say no when the orders became more than I could take, and he actually made me see that I had been saying no, thank the goddess, when I could. I pray that the goddess may forgive me; I do not look for you to do so, Michael. It has been enough to see you again and see your sons make it back safely and thus repay the evil I did you in that small way.”

“You helped Rafe in the Tower.” It was a statement.

Ben nodded. “I was…torn. I had hoped that you would stay away once you escaped but we knew from the increased Telepath activity that you were not alone in making your trips to the Mainland. Then the Druids kept telling my father of the prophecy….” He fell silent. Then he said with great sadness. “You have to understand. Jamyn has a valid claim to the throne.”

“Did you hate us for what was done to you? All the years we were growing up, did you already know to hate me? Adam?”

Ben looked into the green eyes that were so much like his own, like his father’s and his son’s. How to answer that? 

“When you were but a baby, my father sent a Mountain Cat to kill you. I transformed into a Cat in order to fight it — it was the first time I ever fought to the death — I was barely fifteen and terrified when I saw this creature standing over you. The fear made me shift — and I was able to fight the attacker off. Shock at finding another Metamorph there, and no doubt the knowledge that he could not kill his master’s son, gave me an advantage over the killer, but I was badly hurt nonetheless. Still, you were my brother; at least, I still thought you were my brother, and it was both my duty and my desire to save you from attack. Until then, it was known that I bore the taint but no one thought that I was that close to a Metamorph that I could actually transform. It was…not taken well, though the immediate benefit was acknowledged. I did not fully understand what had happened to me until the next day, although I did know enough to have Deryk bring weapons and make it look as though I had used them to kill the Metamorph. It was not enough to fool the King.   I was watched carefully and soon enough, they confronted me. I was taken aside and questioned and I confessed how I had managed to make the kill. That was when it was explained that, grateful though my grandfather and ‘father’ were that I had saved the favored youngest prince’s life, I was to be sent away.”

Michael paled. “I never knew. I was told that you had saved me, not that you were sent away as a result.”

That same half smile. “They waited a few weeks and then it was done in the usual way, explained as an opportunity to form an alliance with the Third Kingdom. It was there that my true father came to visit me, and explained my real status. My sojourn in the Third Kingdom was the beginning of his tutelage. In between the Druids’ lessons, many of which were aimed at teaching me to control signs of the taint, once they satisfied themselves that they could not poison it out of me, but through it all, I was being trained in secret by Jamyn in how to hate.”

Ben closed his eyes. He was exhausted. A moan made him open his eyes. Michael was bent over, his hands clutching his head, his features twisted in pain.

“Michael, what is it?”

The cat, it’s on top of me, it’s so heavy and its breath is so hot. I’m so frightened and I can’t draw a breath to scream, and the fear, it’s stopping me from calling for help in my mindspeech. It is going to bite me now and I will die…. Michael’s mental speech was that of his much younger self; it was as though he was having a flashback to when he was a child.

Ben was startled but reacted instinctively, reaching out with his mind for his brother’s familiar thoughts. No, Michael, that was many years ago, you are safe now, I killed the Cat, you are safe, call Colin to you now, Michael. You are safe. You are a powerful Telepath and no one can hurt you now.

Ben sent a telepathic call to Deryk to bring Colin as he forced his weak arms to move high enough to pull his trembling brother down onto his bed so that he could hug him close. He was conscious that some of his wounds pulled open and began to bleed but he ignored that, all of his focus was on calming Michael, who was overwhelmed by memories that had been buried for over thirty years and were now released by their conversation, he thought, not knowing of Colin’s well-intentioned action during the night in removing the block that had been placed so long ago by Adam.

Colin and Deryk ran into the room.

“I warned you, Ben Emory,” Colin exclaimed, but before he could attack, Dominic and Lycan, with Fen on their heels, entered the healing room from the opposite side. Dominic put a shield between Ben and Colin, though even he was barely able to withstand the force of Colin’s anger fueled blast. Fen went straight to Michael to aid him with the fear that he could feel crushing his foster father. Using his empathic power, he drew it away, and sent calming sensations into Michael’s mind, not controlling ones but gentling ones, triggering emotions much like those that Ben’s physical sensations were generating. He tried to send some of the same feelings toward Colin.

“What is going on,” Nic asked, collapsing onto the chair Michael had been sitting in. Lycan was holding onto Colin, to keep him from pulling at Michael, who was just beginning to calm.

Lycan was restraining Colin, Deryk was tending to Ben’s reopened wounds. It was left to Fen, who had his arms around Michael, to answer.

“Michael has had a terrifyingly realistic flashback to the Metamorph attack he experienced when he was a very young child. Ben did nothing to cause this, Colin, but on the contrary, I sense that Ben’s presence was comforting to him.  I’m trying to determine why this event, which he has mentioned before, has suddenly caused him such distress.”

Fen’s homey face reflected his confusion. Nic moved over to the bed and placed his hands on his father’s head, the better to lend his comfort to him telepathically also. Neither of them noticed Colin’s stricken expression; they were concentrating on Michael, but Lycan, who was still holding onto him, did. He asked, in a low voice intended for Colin’s ears only, “What do you know of this?”

Colin shook his head, and whispered, “I never thought…I did not intend for this to happen.”

Deryk turned to him from Ben, his keen hearing picking up the softly spoken words. “So, it was you who caused the harm to Lord Michael that you were so quick to blame on Lord Ben? See, in his efforts to help, my master has caused fresh injury to himself!”

“He’ll survive,” Lycan said, glancing at the bleeding areas. “Such minor bleeding would not cause a tough old cat like Emory to blink twice.”

Ben gave his half smile at that, knowing it to be a rare compliment from the Wolf Leader. And, he reflected, it was true. He brushed Deryk and his fussing away with an impatient hand.

“I am fine, Deryk. If you wish to do something, get all of us something to drink since it appears that half the household has awoken at this ridiculous hour. And get the Wolf some meat. He is eying my blood too speculatively for my liking.”

Lycan’s laugh at that rude comment caught Nic’s attention, and it even jarred Michael out the traumatic memories.  Colin, seeing that Michael was calmer, judged it time to take over from Fen, and wrapped his arms around his partner.

“Michael, I am so sorry! I never dreamed that helping you with your nightmare would cause you such distress.”

“I am fine,” Michael said coolly; although he allowed Colin to put an arm around him as he stood up, it couldn’t have been clearer that he was resuming the aura of tough infallibility that had been his for so many years.

Nic raised an eyebrow.  Fen’s brow furrowed. Colin sighed. Ben’s smile deepened as he surveyed the reactions.  Lycan just shook his head.

“Pack sire, you are still weary, as is my Cub. I suspect everyone is, including the little bear here, who takes such good care of all our pack. Let me gather some blankets and put them near the fire in this healing room. It is a good time for all of us to be together. Nic can call Rafael and Melli to us as well. Bran will bring Lydia to a pallet near the fire also. We have Nic back with us and your brother, it is natural for us to feel called to be close. I have had some time alone with Nic and now can share him with his family. He needs you all close, just as you all need to be close.”

Fen nodded his agreement. Michael’s face reflected his surprise while Nic hugged Lycan  happily before he turned to Colin and hugged him also.

“Colin, do not say no, this is a brilliant idea! I do want my family close after being away from all of you so long. And Ben won’t mind. We can keep an eye on him — not that Deryk is not doing a wonderful job of caring for him.” Nic flashed his charming smile at the quiet druid. “But it does feel right to all be together for this homecoming instead of shut away in our separate rooms. Lycan, get the blankets and tell Bran to get Lydia. I’ll send a message to Rafe and Melli! I’ll call Magda too. It will be just like the old days at the island.”

Nic’s joy was infectious, and it was enough to remove the remaining awkwardness.
 
“I will let you rest now. We will speak again. I am grateful for the aid you gave Rafe and Nic when they needed a friend in captivity — those acts of kindness alone would outweigh any mistakes you made in the past, and the courage you showed in fighting on our side yesterday put us in your debt. I do not yet understand the wrongs done by my father…but I do know I spent over sixteen years sworn to avenge the murders of my wife and unborn child, as well as that of my King and brother, and if I can forgive your part in those great wrongs for the sake of the future of the Kingdoms, perhaps you can forgive the wrongs done to your father and you for the good of those same Kingdoms, because I have to believe that whatever rights your father had, there can be no doubt after yesterday that Dominic is the goddess’ choice for King.”

Ben smiled, his eyes still closed.  He whispered, “You have no idea what a relief that is to me, not just your forgiveness, which I do not take lightly, but that the goddess has placed the future of the Kingdoms in such able hands, as there is a greater danger than my father or son. Perhaps discussion of it can wait until morning?”

Lycan did not leave it up to debate, but with a quiet growl, soon had everyone settling back down to sleep, with only the entry of the rest of the family, his “Pack” disturbing the quiet for the next few minutes. And then there was blessed quiet for several hours while all slept a healing sleep.
 

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