Broken Toys

Chapter 58

"I'm sorry I could not attend the graduation, Billy. I had other matters to attend to. But I wanted to see you, to wish you luck."

Billy returned Mr Trotta's smile and tried to ignore the bodyguard trailing behind, and the weight of the eyes upon them. He looked up towards the house and squinted, wondering if it were a trick of the light or if he really saw Casey at the upstairs window, watching.

Pushing those thoughts aside, he turned his attention back to Mr Trotta who was talking again, moving at a slow but steady pace. Joey's father had suggested that they walk on the pretext of stretching his legs, but more likely it was to give them some measure of privacy.

"You probably thought you'd never see me again after I collected Joey's things." The older man looked down at his feet for a moment, then back up, his gaze steady. "I wasn't exactly at my best then. I said some things I regret."

"Mr Trotta."

"Allow me to say this. I am a decisive person, Billy. I react quickly. That works in business but perhaps not as well in more.... delicate matters. You were my son's friend. His... lover. I had no right to try and keep you from his funeral."

Billy hunched his shoulders uncomfortably. "Sir, I... Look, I appreciate that you came here, but I really don't think that today is the best time to do this." He looked towards the house. His mother was standing on the porch looking in his direction and Billy had the sense that she was watching his every move. "It's just... we have to move on, right? Keep the good memories and all that?"

"That's part of why I'm here. I've brought you a graduation present."

Billy looked up at the taller man in surprise, then slowly turned to look back at the parked cars. He had a sudden suspicion as to what the gift might be and his throat tightened. Before he could speak, Joey's father started to explain. "Joey and I did not always get along, but I know how he felt about you."

Billy looked over at the man, working hard to stay silent and hear his explanation. Joey's father smiled back sadly.

"It's only after my son's death that I learned to understand him, Billy. I read his books, listened to his music, looked at his drawings. He loved you." The words were drawn out of the man with pain but he looked at Billy with kindness. "And I think you loved him just as much in return."

"When I came to get Joey's things... I had no right to speak to you that way." Mr Trotta placed one hand on Billy's shoulder. "I apologized with words, then, not with my heart. Now I apologize with my heart. I only hope you will accept." Trotta placed his other hand on Billy's left shoulder and waited.

Billy cleared his throat uneasily and offered up a scratchy, "Sure."

Trotta removed his hands slowly. "You are a good man, Billy. My son was fortunate to know you. You are better now?"

"I'm fine." Billy forced a grin. "Graduated and everything."

"I was concerned." Trotta turned and looked back towards the house. "But it seems as if everything is working out for you."

An awkward silence stretched out between them until, at last, Mr Trotta looked over at his bodyguard and nodded. They walked briskly back towards the parked cars.

"I'm sorry I can't stay longer. I only wanted to come today to see you, to make sure you were all  right. You see, my son... he loved this car." They  stopped beside the old junker and the driver, who had been standing beside it, stepped forward and handed Billy the keys while Mr Trotta continued speaking. "Joey would want you to have his car, Billy."

Billy turned, not really shocked, but still not wanting the reality of this. "No! Mr Trotta, I can't."

"You can. You will. For Joey. Take care of it for him, Billy." Mr Trotta stepped back, looking at Billy and then the car for a moment.

The sound of another car broke the awkward silence and Billy was thankful for the disturbance. He looked towards the house and realized that Zeke and Casey were approaching, as if sensing his need. Unfortunately, his mother was right behind them.

A tan Lexus roared into the clearing, raising dust and causing everyone to move back as it glided to a stop. Zeke was close enough that Billy could hear his muttered curse.

"Fashionably late, as usual," Zeke muttered. "My parents always have to make an entrance."

"At least they came," Casey said soothingly, brushing a hand against Zeke's.

Zeke's whole body had tensed as soon as he realized that his parents had actually showed up. Casey moved closer, hoping to offer support without intruding. Billy was there, slightly behind the pair, caught between his desire to be with them and his need to complete the conversation with Joey's father.

"I should go." Mr Trotta gripped Billy's shoulders and pulled him in to kiss both cheeks. He released Billy and stepped back, his eyes fixed on Billy's face as if he was memorizing him. "All the information  you'll need for the car is in the glove compartment. Treat it well."

Billy nodded and accepted the set of keys he was offered. He wanted to say something more, something that would let this man know how much he appreciated the gesture, even though accepting the car made Billy feel uncomfortable. It was like grave-robbing or something.

"Joey would want you to have this, Billy. Remember that." Without another word, Mr Trotta nodded to his hirelings and turned away. The bodyguard hovered as the man walked determinedly to his car and got into the back. The man who had driven Joey's car had already climbed into the other vehicle. Less than a minute later, the car was accelerating out of the driveway, leaving only dust behind.

"Do you know who that was?" Billy started at the demanding voice and turned to see that Zeke's mother had emerged from the car. Zeke's father trailed a few steps behind her, both of them overdressed in clothing more appropriate for a formal garden party than a picnic. They both appeared to be half-intrigued, half-repulsed by the visitor who had just left.

Billy joined his two lovers, ready to reply, but Zeke beat him to it. "Yeah, that was the father of Billy's old roommate. What about him?"

"Son, that was Joseph Trotta, head of the --"

"We know who he is, sir," Billy interrupted. He was suddenly exhausted and was getting a headache. He was in no mood to discuss anything about the Trotta family.

"Surely that is not the kind of person with whom you've been associating while at this school." Mrs. Tyler studied the three boys with equal scrutiny before fixing her eyes on Zeke.

"Nope," Zeke replied coldly. "Considering his son's dead." He looked over at Billy, telegraphing apology before continuing. "Not that his being here is any of your concern." Zeke ignored the brush of Casey's hand and crossed his arms. "Why are you here, anyway?"

"Do you always have to be like this?" Mrs Tyler complained. "You turn every conversation into an argument."

"Would that be all -- what, three conversations we've had in the last year? Wait, we talked earlier today. Make that four."

"Zeke."

"It's no wonder he is the way he is." Billy's mother had joined the group. "Faggots have no respect for anyone, not even themselves."

"Mother," Billy protested. He was appalled by her behavior. Despite his reluctance to out himself, he'd never really believed that his parents would turn out to be like Casey's. Yet there was his mother staring daggers at Zeke, denouncing Zeke before his own parents.

"What is she talking about?" Mrs Tyler took a step closer to her son, her eyes narrowing at the sight of the purple welt on Zeke's neck. She looked at Billy suspiciously, then at Casey, gasping when she saw the matching welt.

She pointed one elegantly manicured finger at Zeke. "What exactly is going on here?"

"What does it look like?" Zeke countered. He hated this, he hated that every single time he faced his parents there was a confrontation, but he had no idea how to break the habit.

He felt the warmth of Casey's hand brush against his back and reached for it, grateful for Casey's strength. He drew the smaller teen closer and smiled down at him before looking up at his parents.  He let his smile thin and harden. "I believe you've already met Casey... my lover?"

"This is ridiculous!" Billy's mother exploded, disgusted by the boys and by the ineffectual protests of Zeke's parents. If no one else was going to put a stop to this outrage, she would. She stomped over to Billy and grabbed his arm, trying to drag him away.

"Come with me, Billy. We're packing your things and getting out of here. It was bad enough when I suspected, but now - I won't have you living with such - such filth!"

"Stop it!" Billy pleaded. He pulled out of his mother's grip and backed up. "Just stop it." He was almost whispering now, his eyes wild. The exhaustion, the chaos of graduation, the fear of being found out, the memories of Joey... It was too much.

"Billy," Casey said softly. He exchanged a quick look with Zeke, then slipped away from his side. He moved quietly towards the miserable boy, one hand slightly extended. Billy reached for it as if he were grasping for a lifeline.

"It's all right." Casey spoke only to Billy, ignoring the voices behind them. He held Billy's gaze as if his will alone could calm him. When their hands connected, he let Billy pull him in until they could wrap each other in a desperate embrace.

Billy buried his face against Casey's neck, breathing in his lover as if he had been oxygen-starved. They clung together while Zeke joined them, standing slightly apart, almost uncertain of his welcome. Taking a tentative step closer, he laid a hand against Billy's neck, letting it rest there in a calming gesture.

"Zeke." Billy lifted his head from the haven of Casey's shoulder and looked over at the taller boy. It was clear what he needed.

"Shh. It's okay." Zeke leaned down and their lips met in the gentlest of kisses. Casey moved one hand to draw Zeke into the embrace. The trio held on to each other, blocking out everything beyond their circle.

Until they were torn apart by parents' fingers turned to talons that dug hard into arms and shoulders. Casey went first, dragged away by the fury of Billy's mother while Zeke's parents attempted to control their son.

Billy staggered back, eyes wide with the horror of his mother shaking Casey, shouting into his face. He felt suddenly ill, as if he might vomit or pass out. Desperately he looked for his father, hoping the same madness hadn't infected him.

"Stop it. Stop it. Stop!" he cried, launching himself into the nightmare, gripping his mother's arm and trying to pull her away from Casey. He was saying something, maybe screaming it, but he couldn't understand a word.

"Billy, Calm down! Calm down!" Hands were on him again - hands that didn't belong to Zeke or Casey, and Billy reacted violently, jerking his body away.  The hands captured him again, pulled at him. For a horrifying moment, he saw the face of Cali, the terrorist who had tormented him.

Billy erupted, kicking and screaming, flailing his arms - anything to free himself from his captor. His vision blurred and the memory of being held down across the large wooden desk returned with frightening clarity. He could smell furniture polish, pen ink and blood.

Large hands caught his face in a gentle hold and a familiar voice pressed insistently against his ears. Another set of hands caught his and guided them to rest against yielding cloth-covered flesh. A second familiar voice joined the first.

Slowly he calmed, awareness returning in bits until he could comprehend what he was seeing and hearing. Zeke. That was Zeke talking. And Casey. Their voices, their warmth surrounding him, sheltering him. He sagged, trusting them to hold him upright while he gathered enough strength to face everyone.

"You're safe, Billy. It's okay. Breathe." Their voices were reassuring in a way Billy had never heard before. The feel of Casey's heartbeat under Billy's palm helped to ease the fear until Billy could gather enough strength to face the assembled parents. He leaned to Casey and kissed his forehead while letting Zeke's embrace support him.

It *was* okay. He could do this.

Billy eased out of the arms that had shielded him and turned to face the parents. He didn't expect to see his father and his step-father, both equally red-faced with anger, restraining his mother. They each held one arm tightly, while she struggled between them. A few feet away Zeke's parents watched, stunned. Snuffy, the Dean and Billy's step-mother stood further back, wearing expressions of shock and horror.

Billy's father released his ex-wife's arm, nodding his thanks to Billy's step-father before he approached Billy. Without a word he gathered his son into his arms and squeezed him fiercely. He pressed his face into Billy's hair and tightened his embrace, as if he was afraid Billy would disappear. Billy felt something wet on the top of his head.

"Dad," he whispered.

"I'm so sorry," Billy's father whispered. "Billy."

"It's okay, Dad. I'm okay." Billy clutched at his father's arms. It had been a long time since his father had hugged him like this. Billy could feel moisture pressing against the backs of his eyelids, threatening to spill over. He swallowed hard a few times and managed to force the tears back. He couldn't cry. There had already been too much upset on what was supposed to be a happy day.

"Casey, Zeke, get over here."

Exchanging a glance, the two other boys moved closer to Billy and his father. They were surprised when he gathered them both in a hug, holding them tight before finally letting go. It was clear that he didn't like indulging in such displays, but his expression was determined. He looked at the rest of the group, who were watching with degrees of interest and concern.

"I'm going to say this once, Elizabeth... and anyone else who needs to get their heads clear about this. You don't have to like the boys' relationship, but I expect every one of you to support them."

Zeke opened his mouth to say something but Billy's father squeezed Zeke's shoulder and shook his head. Zeke closed his mouth without uttering a word.

"I've just heard a lot of nonsense today, so let me remind you of some truths. Last fall Billy was almost killed by terrorists. The same terrorists that killed his roommate, Joey. While we were waiting for news about our boys, Mr Trotta and I spoke briefly. We both learned a few things we didn't expect about our sons and their very close friendship. I doubt either of us were very happy at the time -- but tell me if that mattered to Mr. Trotta a day later when he found out that Joey was dead."

"Then a little while later I find out that my Billy's not doing so good." He reached for Billy's hand and held it tightly. "Billy needed help. But what could I do? What could anyone do?"

Mr Tepper motioned towards the Dean. "So I had a long talk with the Dean. He told me about a transfer student, Casey Conner. Turns out Casey and Billy had a few things in common." Tepper placed a hand on Casey's shoulder and squeezed it lightly. It wasn't his place to speak about the dark place both boys had been in, but he felt it necessary to remind everyone how perilously close they had come to failing these young men.

"I want all you wise parents to tell me what's more important? A child who lives the way we want him to, or a child who lives at all? Because less than a year ago there was a very real possibility that none of these kids was going to be alive to see their graduation day. Do any of you understand that?"

"This is outrageous!" Billy's mother started to protest but her husband stopped her with a quick gesture.

"Elizabeth..." Billy's step-father spoke quietly but firmly. "Billy is a bright young man with a promising future. You should be proud of him and the fine young men who are sharing his life. Their relationship might be a little unconventional, but from what I've seen, it's good for all three of them." His expression softened. "This has all been too much for one day. Why don't we go back to the hotel and get some rest. You'll feel better about everything tomorrow."

Elizabeth looked at her son, then back at her husband. The anger and hurt were slowly replaced with uncertainty. "I don't understand this. I just..." She slowly nodded. "Maybe you're right." She cast another look at Billy and the two other boys, then  nodded to the group and let herself be led to the car.

Everyone watched the couple leave. Only after the car had faded far into the distance did anyone speak.

"Man, Ric is going to be ticked off that he missed all of the excitement," Snuffy commented. "You guys throw a hell of a party."

"Family drama night on the farm, news at eleven," Billy intoned.

"Just so long as we don't end up on one of those daytime talk shows where they throw chairs," Casey said. "They'd probably bring in my dad as the surprise guest."

Zeke snorted. "Don't give anyone in this crowd ideas, Case." Zeke cast a look at his parents, who were speaking to Dean Parker. In an undertone he asked, "How soon can we ditch the parents? I need a drink!"

"That's not what *I* need," Billy countered, grinning.

"Whoa. Too much info," Snuffy said, making a time out motion with his hands. "I think that's my cue to leave. Don't want the parentals sending out the search dogs." He punched Billy lightly, then messed up Casey's hair just to tick him off. "We still on for tomorrow afternoon?"

"Yeah. See ya, Snuffy," Billy yelled as he, Zeke and Casey waved. For a moment, the boys were alone, and then Zeke's parents and the Dean approached. The Dean reminded Casey of their meeting in two weeks and left. Before his car was out of sight, Zeke's father spoke.

"You've always done things differently, Zeke. But this... I think your mother and I need time to absorb everything. We were planning on leaving tomorrow but maybe we'll stick around for a few days." He looked over at his wife for confirmation and she nodded once, almost managing a smile. He turned to Zeke. "If that's okay with you?"

Zeke nodded, his expression neutral. He was too raw right now to let himself feel too optimistic, but one tiny, rebellious part of his brain clung to a thought that maybe there was hope for his parents after all.

As if he knew what was in Zeke's mind, Casey reached over and squeezed Zeke's hand. Zeke smiled at him, then stepped forward towards his parents. "You didn't get to eat anything. Would you like cake or something? You could take it with you."

Zeke's mother started to refuse, then changed her mind. "Maybe something small?" She looked up at the darkening sky; it would be twilight soon, not too late for a snack.

"I'll get a container," Casey offered, then dashed off towards the house. Zeke smiled at him, then led the way to the picnic table where the food was. He lifted the cover on the graduation cake that Snuffy's family had brought.

Billy had gone to talk to his father, and the Tylers were alone. Zeke's mother placed a hand on Zeke's arm. She looked at him searchingly for a moment, then smiled. "We could came to visit tomorrow, if you don't mind... maybe bring some pizza? You could show us around?" She faltered. "Unless you have other plans?"

"Pizza would be great," Zeke said. "One o'clock?"

"Fine." Awkwardly, she leaned forward and brushed her lips against Zeke's cheek. "Tomorrow at one." She moved back, then stopped. She offered a small but genuine smile. "We are proud of you, Zeke. We're not very good about showing it, but we are."

Zeke looked at her, then at his father, and nodded. He watched his parents hold hands while walking back to their rental car, pausing only to accept the cake Casey had wrapped for them. They smiled and waved as they drove away. Zeke tried to remember the last time he'd seen them smile like that.

"They're coming back tomorrow?" Casey asked as he moved close enough to put his arm around Zeke's waist.

"Umm," Zeke murmured, his eyes unfocused as he stared off in the distance.

"Good." Casey rested his head against Zeke's shoulder. He could hear Billy's voice a short distance away and the sound, combined with Zeke's presence soothed Casey. He could almost close his eyes.

The deep bass of Billy's father's laughter startled him and Casey pulled away to see what was so amusing. Billy and his dad were trading fake punches as they walked towards Mr Tepper's SUV. Billy's step-mother was already in the vehicle.

"Everybody's gone, so we'd better take the hint, too." Billy's father reached out and grabbed Billy, giving him a huge hug. "We'll be back for the chairs and things."

"Sure, Dad. We'll get the rest of this cleaned up tonight and be ready for you."

"Leave it. We'll take care of the clean up tomorrow."

"It's okay. I think we need to wind down a little anyway."

Billy looked over at Casey and Zeke who had gone to take the last of the food inside. They wanted to give Billy time alone with his dad.

"About what you said tonight - " Billy started.

"I meant it, Billy. I won't pretend to understand when I don't, but that doesn't mean I won't accept your choices. All I expect is that you'll be careful. You're smart enough to know the risks of what you're doing."

"We're careful."

"Good." Billy's dad reached over and punched him in the arm lightly. "Mr High School Graduate."

They shared a laugh before Billy's dad stepped back. "I don't say it enough, but I'm proud of you, kid."

"Thank you." Billy looked down, blushing lightly.

"Now let me get out of here so you boys can get some rest. It's been a big day."

Billy smiled. "Yes it has."

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