Broken Toys

Chapter 39

"What's his problem?" Hank demanded, gesturing at Casey who stood some distance away, pressed against the wall, an armload of textbooks held tightly against his chest.

"Nothing," Snuffy said casually, grabbing Hank's arm and trying to turn him towards the door to the cafeteria. "Come on, the mystery meat'll get cold."

"No," Hank pulled away and took a step towards Casey. "I asked what your problem is, Conner."

"Hank," Snuffy tried to intervene again but Hank brushed him aside and took another step. Casey slid back along the wall, trying to put some distance between them, his expression wary.

"Come on, Conner. I know you can use that clever mouth or Billy wouldn't spend so much time with you. Of course, it's not your conversation that he likes so much, now is it?"

Hank ignored Snuffy's protests, moving closer to Casey, his large form threatening as he closed in on the smaller boy. Casey looked up at him, wide-eyed and pale, speechless with shock at this sudden change in behavior. Hank had never been a close friend, but they had gotten alone ok until that night at the farmhouse. Since then Casey had tried his best to stay away from him.

"What do you want, Hank?" he managed to ask, his voice barely above a whisper. He kept his eyes focused on Hank's face, but didn't look into his eyes, afraid that Hank would take it as a challenge. He wanted to either fix whatever was wrong or at least end this confrontation, for Billy's sake as well as his own.

By now there was a crowd gathering, waiting to see if there would be a fight. Casey tried to ignore them and concentrate only on keeping himself calm. He could do this, he didn't need someone to bail him out this time.

Hank caught Casey's shoulders and slammed him back against the wall. Casey gasped and tightened his grip on his books. Hank was leaning in close enough that Casey could tell he hadn't brushed his teeth since eating breakfast.

Words were flowing, cruel, hateful words spoken so that only Casey could hear them. He couldn't stop himself from turning his head away, desperately wanting the torrent to stop. It hurt so much more than the beatings he used to get at his old school. At least that pain would fade...

"I said, stop it!" Snuffy shouted, grabbing Hank with more strength than Casey would have imagined he possessed. Snuffy was shouting into Hank's face, diverting his attention and Casey managed to slide farther away, out of Hank's reach. He could feel the eyes of the other students watching him and it made him feel sick.

Somehow Snuffy was dragging Hank away and the other boys were starting to move as well. Casey remained pressed against the wall, trying not to hear the comments and laughter. He caught one last glimpse of Snuffy before he and Hank disappeared into the cafeteria. Snuffy was looking at him and his expression was apologetic.

Casey leaned against the wall for another moment before heading off in the opposite direction. He had no intention of walking into the cafeteria while Hank was in there. Question was: how was he going to avoid the boy from now until graduation, especially when he was Billy's friend.

Sick at heart, Casey started the long journey to the darkroom, needing time alone.

*****

He woke up feeling groggy and disoriented, his head stuffy and his throat painfully sore. It took him a few seconds to realize where he was; curled up on a chair in the darkroom. It took even longer to remember why.

Hank.

He peered at his watch, dismayed to find that he'd slept most of the afternoon away and it was nearly suppertime. He'd missed his afternoon class and didn't doubt that Zeke and Billy would be annoyed or even angry at him for disappearing without telling them where he was headed. He just hoped the dean wouldn't find out and be angry as well, it would be nice to have one person who wasn't upset with him.

He rose slowly, trying to ease the stiffness out of his body, and moved efficiently around the room, straightening it. He had been cleaning the darkroom rather than developing photos so at least he hadn't ruined anything by falling asleep. With a final look to make sure the room was tidy, he reluctantly headed towards the door.

"Casey."

"Dean Parker," Casey replied, startled to find the man sitting on the steps, apparently waiting for him. "What are you doing here?"

"Your teachers might ask you the same question, Mr. Conner."

"I'm sorry, sir. I came down here at lunchtime to straighten up but I fell asleep."

"You must have been tired to sleep away the afternoon in there, Mr. Conner. I don't imagine it's very comfortable."

"No, sir. I'm sorry."

"Have you been to the school nurse for that cold, Mr. Conner?"

"No, sir. I mean, I intended to, but..."

"You fell asleep."

"Yes, sir."

The dean sighed and stood up slowly, taking a step towards the miserable teen. It might have been a trick of the poor lighting down here, but Casey looked terrible.

"Casey, I'm going to overlook your missing class if," he paused and gave Casey a stern look. "And only if you report to the nurse immediately." He took another step closer and reached out to Casey, placing a hand on his arm. "You need to get better."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."

"And Casey," the dean made sure he had Casey's full attention before continuing. "If anything is troubling you. Anything. I want to you know that you can talk to me about it. I'm not Dr Carson, but I'll do what I can to help."

Casey swallowed hard against the sudden lump in his throat and nodded, unable to form words. Obediently he followed the dean up the stairs and headed off to the nurse's office.

*****

"It's got to stop, Billy." Zeke's voice was carefully controlled but Billy knew he was furious. His body was tense, ready to strike out, aching to extract payment in pain from somebody, anybody.

"I don't have any control over it, Zeke. Look, Hank's my friend. I've known him a lot longer than I've known you. I'm not just going to blow him off. There's got to be a reason behind what happened today. The least I can do is hear his side of things."

Zeke half-growled and turned away. "I don't give a damn what he is, Tepper. If he pulls anything like he did today; if he does or says anything like that ever again to Casey..." Zeke turned to face Billy and there was cold resolve in his eyes. "I will make him sorry."

"Oh, big threats, Zeke. Save it for the drama department. We weren't there, we didn't see what happened. I'm not going to accuse my friend of anything until I know what really happened."

"While you're over there playing nice maybe you can ask your *friend* what he did to your *lover* considering no one has seen Casey since their little talk outside the cafeteria."

Billy's control snapped and he lunged forward, fist already moving to strike. He'd been aching to do this for days, maybe even weeks now. Didn't matter that they were lovers, didn't matter that they shared a bed almost every night. Zeke had been begging for this ever since he showed up that Saturday afternoon when Casey fell out of the tree.

The feel of fist on face was satisfyingly real and Billy almost laughed when Zeke returned the favor. The pain felt far off and Billy barely noticed it as he tried to land another punch.

They were too close for really good punching now, and had switched to almost-wrestling without conscious thought. It was just act and react, the only thing that mattered was the rage.

Items were knocked off of desks and dressers as they fought, the sounds of impact providing an irregular rhythm for their movements. Beyond the door was the sound of hallmates gathering, talking with raised voices, debating whether to open the door or not.

Something distant was heard, almost a hum or a buzz, building like the music in a dramatic movie scene. Neither Billy nor Zeke could pull themselves from their rage to acknowledge it although they both knew it would be bad. Terrible.

Casey.

He stood in the doorway, watching, horrified, his mouth open but no words coming out. Breathing quickening, face flushed, he ignored the jostling of the boys behind him all vying for a view of the carnage. An accidental elbow caught Casey in the ribs and jolted him out of his shocked silence.

"Stop it!"

He waded into the fray, an edge of hysteria in his voice as he tried to intervene. He grabbed the first body part he came in contact with - Billy's arm - and held on tight, trying to make him stop. Instead, a solid punch went astray and sent Casey backwards into a dresser, his body colliding painfully before he lost his balance and slid sideways, landing hard on the floor.

There should have been a moment of stunned silence, followed instantly by regrets and self-recriminations. Like the movies. Instead, Casey was all but ignored as Zeke and Billy continued fighting each other. Casey felt anger of his own, furious at the stupidity he was witnessing.

He dragged himself up, ignoring the pain, waving off Snuffy and the others who were willing to help, wanting to laugh at those who were only there for the show. None of that was important. What mattered was destructing right in front of him.

Casey had never hit anyone before, not like this, wanting to inflict pain. He lashed out blindly. In that moment he hated his lovers so intensely he could feel the blackness of rage consuming him. There was nothing rational left, no inner voice to urge caution or question his actions. There was only pain and anger and despair so profound it was drowning him.

It took the combined efforts of Snuffy and Ricardo to pull him off of Billy and Zeke. They dragged him to Snuffy's room and tossed him onto the bed, leaving Snuffy to try and calm Casey while Ric went back to help separate Billy and Zeke.

Casey was out of his head, trying to get past Snuffy to return to the fight. He wasn't throwing punches, but he used bony elbows and knees to try and get free. Snuffy quickly decided he'd had enough and dragged Casey roughly across the room and shoved him in the closet, slamming and locking the door.

The change was almost immediate. Casey assaulted the door with almost desperate strength, his screams changing from angry to frantic before quickly fading to silence. The strangeness of Casey's behavior unnerved Snuffy and he reached for the doorknob, anxious to release him from the closet. Billy's angry voice stopped him; better to keep Casey where he was until things calmed down.

Stepping into the hall, Snuffy saw that Hank and Ric had managed to separate Zeke and Billy and the crowd was dispersing. Billy and Hank were headed towards Hank's room while Zeke and Ric were amid the ruins of Zeke's room.

Returning to his own room Snuffy called through the closet door, letting Casey know he was going to let him out. He was appalled to find Casey huddled on the closet floor, pale face already revealing an angry bruise and bleeding lip. Casey's eyes were haunted and he flinched away from the hand that Snuffy held out to him.

Snuffy backed away and watched as Casey struggled to his feet. Moving like a wary, wounded animal, Casey made his way across the room, not looking at Snuffy. He stopped suddenly in the doorway and turned, completely lost. His eyes swept the room as if grasping for something, anything that would make sense of what had just happened. Finding nothing, he turned again, leaving the room and turning away from his roommates. It wasn't until he was gone that Snuffy realized what had been bothering him - there had been blood on Casey's wrist.

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