A Garden in Secret

It's a gorgeous Friday night and I'm on a mission, looking fabulous in teal I might add. I strut into the diner and wave at Deb who is completely unaware that I'm here to kidnap everyone's favorite twink. Okay, everyone but Michael. And maybe Ted.

Well, he's my favorite twink, anyway. And my mission, which I've chosen to accept without the mess of self-destructing things - like in that old TV show which they run on late night cable and I never can resist watching. Anyway, my mission is to deliver the twink for a not-so-secret rendez-vous. So not-secret in fact that he's the only one in our little circle (besides Deb, who can't keep a secret like this to save her wig) that doesn't know about it.

He's lugging around a plastic bin full of dirty dishes and looking hopelessly unsunshiny at the moment and I just know we're going to have to do something about that before I can complete my mission. Or at least get the boy to change into something that doesn't scream: "angst killed my fashion sense".

It's one thing to be depressed, it's quite another to dress like that. Maybe he got his laundry mixed up with violin-boy's before he moved out. What a nightmare that would be.

I'm sitting at the counter talking to Henry, who should never wear that shade of pink, by the way, when Justin returns looking like tragedy in sneakers. He manages a weak greeting, barely looking up from the order pad.

He's back with the coffee before he responds to the second half of my order. "I don't really feel like going to Babylon, Em."

"Good, because that's not where we're going." I reach out and take his hand, pulling him close so he has to lean way over the counter. I whisper the promise of culinary delights into his ear and he's smiling a little when I let him go.

"Ready?" I ask unnecessarily - Debbie's given him permission to leave and he's already taking off his apron and heading for the back, happy to be sprung a few minutes early. When he returns, he rings up my order and hands me the change before waving to Debbie and following me out the door.

We pause on the street while he gets out a cigarette and lights up. Just getting out of the Diner seems to have lifted his miasma of gloom a little.

"So where's this new place? Is the food really that good?" He's looking a little skeptical but that might just be his normal expression these days. All has not been roses for the boy since the little violinist's sweet words turned sour.

"It's exclusive, Baby, but I happen to know people so... we're in. We'll check it out, have something to eat, and if you don't like it, we'll still have time to hit Babylon."

"Whatever." He drops the cigarette and shrugs like he doesn't really care - the boy is just not himself at all these days. Which is exactly why this needs to be done tonight. He takes a step forward, ready to go but I stop him. "First, you need to change. No twinkie fashionware allowed."

I can tell he's about to protest but I reach into the shopping bag I've been carrying and pull out a to-die-for mist-grey shirt. It shimmers under the streetlights and he reaches out automatically to touch the silksoft fabric.

"Let's go get you properly dressed, shall we?" And I turn and march off, putting the shirt carefully back into the bag. Not that I'd ever tell Justin, but that little bit of fabric would set him back more than a few weeks worth of tips. It's just one of the night's surprises courtesy of his secret benefactor.

"Ted loaned me his car so we can arrive in style." I tell him as we stop beside the familiar vehicle. "We'll just stop over at my place and let you get all tidied up before we go. It's closer."

And we're off, cautiously. I don't drive very often and it makes me nervous when I do, especially after the lectures Ted subjected me to since agreeing to loan me his car for this little plot.

We travel in silence, and while I'm glad to be able to completely focus on driving, it's just not right for the boy to be so quiet. At a stoplight I cast a glance in his direction, but he's looking out the window and I can't see his face. He's oddly still, as if pressed down by the weight of this thoughts.

He thanks me for the shirt and other items in the bag, managing a smile that fades all too quickly, as if it's too much effort to maintain it. He accepts my vague explanation about the clothes without question and goes off to wash and change.

Watching him walk away, I get a shiver right up my spine. It's like seeing a ghost image rather than myreal Sunshine.

While Justin showers, I make a few phone calls to let everyone know we're on schedule. Michael arrives looking decidedly *not* happy and we talk about comics, lord help me, until the boy is squeaky clean and dressed.

With that shirt, a pair of tight black jeans, and his longer hair he looks older and decidedly un-twinkie. In fact, I have to give myself a stern reminder or two about how things are with the boy. Together or not - at the moment - he's still Brian's. I leap up and clap my appreciation.

"Looks like we're ready." I look over at Michael who looks even less happy than he did before. Too bad. It's show time.

"There's just one more thing, Baby," I tell Justin, moving between him and Michael. "Remember I told you this was an exclusive place?" He nods and I smile my most charming smile in return. "Well the owner is a bit... odd about things. He doesn't let anyone see the outside of the place until they've been in the club. So..." I grab him quick while Michael zooms in and gets the blindfold in place.

Justin struggles and for a minute I'm afraid he's going to have a panic attack or something, but I hold on and talk him down until he's under control again. I ask if he's ok and then I take his hand, reassuring him that Michael and I will take care of him.

After a few minutes all the resistance goes out of him and he seems to droop. He waits passively for us to tell him what to do. It about breaks my heart to see the boy like this but I keep my voice happy and keep telling him how much fun he's going to have.

We have a few Three Stooges moments before we work out a system for moving around but finally we're in the car with me in the driver's seat and Michael and Justin in back.

"Just wait until you see the food. You'll forget all this silliness," I try to distract Justin with my comments, but his body language screams anxiety. "Teddy's waiting for us at the club, and he'll help us get you inside. No one else will touch you. Once you're in the club we'll take the blindfold off, okay?"

"Michael brought a CD player for you to listen to. It will make things easier. Ready?" He nods again and Michael puts the headphones over Justin's ears and presses play. It's a new CD by one of his favorite groups and after a few minutes he's more relaxed and his fingers are tapping out the rhythm on his leg. I drive around randomly for a while to completely confuse him. It wouldn't do to ruin the surprise by having him guess where we're going; this little drama needs a big finale.

Ted's waiting impatiently on the sidewalk when I pull up and park. I don't miss the fact that he eyes the car before moving over to open Justin's door.

"Ted just opened the door. He's going to help you out while Michael and I get out. We'll all go up together." I talk loud to be heard over the boy's music and he nods, but I'm not sure if it's in response to my words or the tune.

Thankfully there's an elevator that takes us most of the way up and we only have to worry about a short flight of stairs at the end. For a second, when we first got into the elevator, the boy seemed like he knew where we were - probably the sound and smell of the elevator - but then he shrugged and didn't say anything. I just patted his shoulder and let him listen to his CD.

Justin is getting anxious again and he drags his feet the whole way up the stairs. He almost falls once, and his left hand grips my arm so tight I'm sure there will be bruises.

Our little entourage pauses just outside our destination and I lean in close and tell Justin that we're there. Three more steps and we are.

Our host walks over to greet us and we nod silently before guiding the boy forward.

"Ready, Baby?" I ask as my hands move towards the blindfold. He nods eagerly, he's more than ready for the blindfold to be gone. I slip the headphones off and take the player, shoving it at Michael who has been hovering, waiting, as if he thinks the boy is going to break it or something.

As I'm undoing the blindfold, I feel the boy's posture change. He turns his head slightly and a smile curves his mouth. He's moving as soon as the knot comes undone and I'm left holding the blindfold. I use it to wipe my eyes.

They're standing a few feet apart, motionless, consuming each other with their eyes. We could set off explosives at their feet and they wouldn't even notice. The oddest thing is that they're even breathing in sync, I can see it, chests rising and falling in tandem.

Teddy slips an arm around me and we lean against each other, unable to look away. I'm aware that the others are as spellbound as we are, watching the magic as it happens.

Without breaking eye contact, Brian holds out the object he's been clutching and reluctantly Justin looks down. When he looks up again, his smile could light up half of Pittsburgh. He accepts the offering, and I know right then I'd better hustle over and save it because we're about two seconds away from the patented Taylor-Kinney clinch.

I rescue the gift just as it begins to tilt and set it down on the table in the center of the catered food - all Justin's favorites. I wonder how long it will be before he even notices the food, or the people, or anything else.

"Nice cactus," Mel comments, frowning at the terra cotta pot with its small green plant covered in long deadly-looking spikes.

"It is nice." I give her a sweet smile and help myself to a variety of nibbles, topping off the plateful with two of those big, soft chocolate chip cookies that Justin got me addicted to. It amazes me how some people constantly miss the obvious.

I leave Mel to glower and/or fill up her plate and walk over to the cushioned bench where Daphne is sitting, idly touching the ferns overflowing the planter. I hand her one of the cookies and settle down beside her for a chat. Lindsey is a short distance away, stretched out on a plastic lounge chair with a sleepy Gus in her arms. Michael and Ted have gone to collect Vic and Debbie.

I look over and see that Justin is fused with Brian, oblivious to everything else. He hasn't even noticed the planters overflowing with flowers and greenery that Daphne and I worked so hard on, or the ridiculous tree that Michael picked out. Mel and Linds contributed plastic lawn furniture, much to Brian's horror, and Ted came up with strands of white lights that illuminate the whole place.

It really is a beautiful little garden spot right here on the roof of this old building. Daphne gets up and returns with two glasses of her special fruit punch complete with little umbrellas. We talk quietly and drink and try not to make it obvious that we're watching Brian and Justin's every move.

When Teddy and Michael return with Deb and Vic, the boys separate enough to actually talk to us. Justin manages to put a dent in the buffet and he even gets Brian to eat one of those cookies.

After a while Mel and Linds leave with Gus and the rest of us settle down in chairs or on blankets, just talking or looking up at the stars.

Justin is practically glued to Brian's side the whole time, and Brian holds the boy close, his hand idly caressing the soft fabric of Justin's shirt.

They're seated on a blanket beside the tree and as the evening wears down, Justin pulls a bemused Brian down so they're stretched out side by side, heads resting on a cushion Justin took from one of the chairs. They're kissing again, or maybe it's *still* and it's pretty clear that neither of them would notice if we all slipped away. So we do, giving them privacy to rediscover whatever they thought they'd lost.

I'm the last to go, and I cast one last look back at the two of them, tangled together and beautiful under the stars. I ease the door closed as quietly as possible, leaving the little garden to shelter them and keep them safe.

End

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