The Vow

He grasps the idea with desperation, clinging to it as if it were his only tie to sanity during the long, lonely hours of his vigil. Florian's sleep is restless and Ray never knows if his touch will be accepted or send Florian deeper into torment.

The precious amethysts are always clouded now – with tears, with pain, with fear. They accuse Ray with their lifelessness and he offers no defense. He has no defense.

The bottle becomes Ray's confessional and he drains it of bitter liquid only to fill it with his guilt. "I'll make it right," he pledges, resting his flushed cheek against the cool glass. "Whatever it takes, I'll make it right."

Florian cries out then, as if in protest and Ray salutes his unseeing eyes with the nearly empty bottle. "My promise," he says, and drains the bottle to seal the agreement.

Florian bolts upright, eyes open but unfocused, arms up in self-defense.

"Shhh," Noir murmurs soothingly, keeping his touch light and his voice soft. "You're safe. You're safe." Perhaps if he says it often enough it will be true.

Florian leans against him like a child and Ray feels the dampness of tears stain his shirt. "Rest," he whispers and pats Florian's back until the blond drifts off to sleep again, calm for the moment.

Ray returns to the idea, examining it, refining it until it's perfect. It has to be perfect. When Laila delivers his breakfast, he sends her away with a plea. He knows it's unfair to ask this of her, but fairness is beyond him now. Everything is beyond him. Unless…

It's Michel who delivers it, of course, but Ray is too worn to play his games. He accepts the small box with thanks and waves off the protests. He's deep in debt to his cousin now, but he hasn't the energy to care.

Ray's never been fully accepted by his extended family. He knows that, but it never really mattered, until now. He clutches the box like a lifeline and makes a silent promise; whatever this might cost him, he'll gladly pay.

He lifts the lid slowly, almost reverently and gazes at the item inside. It's small and unpretentious but beautiful all the same, an unbroken circle of milky jade with just a hint of green. The surface is silky smooth and he strokes it with a light touch until he finds the secret. Michel had been furious at first but even he couldn't withstand Ray's unyielding determination. In the end he'd returned with the ring and the prediction of "hell to pay".

Ray sets the empty box aside and carries his treasure to Florian's bed. The blond is restless but asleep and Ray pets his head to soothe him before taking Florian's left hand in his own.

The jade circle fits perfectly on Florian's little finger and Ray twists it slightly so the secret is hidden, palm-side, away from casual glances. The carving is simple and small. By birthright Florian should have something bigger, perhaps in gold, encrusted with jewels and the Rochefort crest. All Ray can offer is a vow to keep him safe, made in the form of a simple band etched with the Courland family crest.

::end::

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